Alpha Tristan

When Matthijs and I wrapped up our conversation an hour later, I felt a buildup of frustration and slight anger in my c.h.e.s.t. I instantly knew it wasn't my own and glanced wearily at my mother as she opened the door. 

I frowned but before I could say anything, she did. 

"I promise it's not because of me." She reached for Matthijs' hand and frowned slightly too. "Just talk to him, okay, sweetheart?"

Nodding absentmindedly, I stepped into the house and closed the door behind me. I sensed him upstairs in our bedroom and I kicked off my shoes and took my jacket off before heading up the stairs. 

When I made it to the bedroom, he was placing something in the bedside drawer and turned around when he realised I was there. His shoulders were tense and a shadow of frustration crossed his face before he sighed and held a hand out to me. 

I linked our fingers and stared up at him, cupping his cheek with my other hand. "You're not okay, what happened? What did she say?"

He squeezed my hand and I could see his jaw muscles tighten as he closed his eyes for a few seconds. "I don't know what I expected from that conversation, but…" he trailed off with a harsh sigh of simmering anger. 

My heart dropped and I felt angry that my mother had upset him. Instantly sensing my shift in mood, he shook his head and leaned down to rest his forehead on mine. 

"I'm not angry at your mother, Kara. I just—" he couldn't control his anger and a low growl fell from his lips. "I can't f.u.c.k.i.n.g escape this man." His eyes screwed shut tightly. He seemed pissed and I assumed that he was talking about Samuel Carew. I couldn't blame him. Carew seemed to follow him everywhere because of me and mother.

"Tristan—"

His hand curled around my wrist. "I don't want to talk about him right now, Kara." He pressed his lips to mine squarely and pulled back, grabbing my face in his hands. "Let me make love to you."

I was shocked by his sudden roughness but I could never control the way he set my body alight. I didn't know whether or not it would do him any good, no matter how much I wanted him. 

"Tristan, I don't think—"

His eyes spoke the truth he couldn't. Samuel Carew and the other alpha had made his life a living hell, and just as he had started truly living again, they came back to haunt him. He needed reassurance but most of all, he needed me. To understand him like nobody else could. 

When he saw my acceptance, his lips slanted over mine with a searing intensity. He stepped closer to me and we stood there as he quickly deepened the kiss. "I love you okay?" he pulled back for a brief moment, staring into my eyes before his lips were back on mine. 

I gripped onto his shirt, stepping up onto my tiptoes to return the kiss. It was deep and passionate and he covered my hands with his, tugging his shirt clean off his body. He slowly sat down on the bed and I straddled him, cupping his face as the taste of him consumed me. 

His hands roamed my body and I sighed into his mouth when he began pulling my top off me. I lifted my arms quickly and felt my hair gather at the collar before it cascaded down my shoulders again. He gave my mouth a reprieve as he kissed my collarbone, pressing his hot tongue to my skin. 

Digging my fingers into his hair, I m.o.a.n.e.d out loud when he dragged his lips further down and pulled at my bra for better access. His mouth was preoccupied but he spoke in my mind. 

'I love how responsive you are, Kara.'

I stared down at him with half-lidded eyes, groaning as I brought his lips back to mine. His hands worked at my jeans and let go of me so I could pull them off. His eyes raked over my body and the sight of his hardening length sent anticipation flowing through me. Within seconds, I was b.a.r.e in front of him and he unbuckled his belt before standing up in front of me. 

Like usual, he towered over me and lowered his lips to mine again as I took it upon myself to unbutton his jeans and tug his clothes down his muscular t.h.i.g.hs. My hand spread out across his abdomen, and I looked up at him to see if the haunted look still clouded his eyes. 

When I saw it, I pressed a soft kiss to his mouth. "Tristan—I'm here. Be here with me." I implored, hoping to make him feel better. "I want you."

He wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me flush against his c.h.e.s.t, cupping my face with his other hand as he returned the short kiss. "I'm sorry. You have my attention—you'll always have my complete attention."

I nodded, tilting my head and resting my forehead against his. "Good." I pressed a kiss to his c.h.e.s.t. "Because I want to kiss every inch of your body." I cracked a small smile and made my way down his sculpted c.h.e.s.t. 

He g.r.o.a.n.e.d quietly, sliding his fingers into my curls and followed my movements as his abdomen tensed under my touch. The heat rolled off him in waves and I kissed his navel softly. He gripped my hair tighter and the breath caught in his throat. 

After a couple of minutes, I glanced up to see his eyes were nearly closed. There was the softest of smiles on his face and the haunted look in his dark blues was gone, replaced by a clouding mist of passion. The growl vibrated deep in his c.h.e.s.t and he forced his eyes open to look at me. 

"Kara…I love you so much." The desperation crossed his face before he suddenly pulled me up by my arms to kiss me.

He lifted me up and laid me down on the bed reverentially as if I was his universe and everything in it. I could barely think of anything but him as he set out to c.a.r.e.s.s my body passionately until I melted in his arms. 

I knew what we had was love. It was clear in the way I thought my heart only seemed to beat for him. It hadn't always been like that but I knew he had been engraved into the very fibre of my being. The mate pull, stronger than ever, pulled us together until our deep and passionate union made one thing very clear. 

I had fallen deeply in love with him and I was still falling. 

My hands curled against his c.h.e.s.t and I threw my head back with a m.o.a.n as he rocked my body on top of him like he had rocked my world, slowly then all at once until he followed me off the cliff. He was there to catch me and held me through it all, pouring his emotions into my mind and heart until the world began and ended with him. 

Pulling me down onto his sweaty c.h.e.s.t as I lost the energy to keep myself upright, he nuzzled his nose into my curls. He grunted quietly into my ear as the aftershocks of his euphoria lightly surged through his body. The only sound in the room was the sound of our heavy breathing and I slung my arm across his stomach before pressing an incredibly light kiss to his skin. 

"I love you too." I weakly murmured, too spent to glance up at him. He c.a.r.e.s.sed my hair gently and the vital organ in his c.h.e.s.t seemed to beat back the response. It was fast and never-ending.

His love for me would never end. 

With the cause of his past anger completely forgotten, I couldn't stop myself from falling asleep in the comfort of his warm embrace. 

—————

"Baby…wake up." I could feel his fingers delicately brushing the wispy strands away from my face and I slowly opened my eyes. 

Tristan cracked a soft smile, c.a.r.e.s.sing my cheek gently. "You're always so beautiful." He brushed his thumb over my slightly swollen bottom lip. "I ran you a bath and made you something to eat."

I sighed and smiled into the pillow. "What time is it?"

"Almost three o'clock." He gently pulled at the covers as I opened my eyes properly. 

"Don't you have to oversee the training?" I slowly sat up and revelled in the ache that coursed through me as I moved. Tristan stood up from the bed and I wrapped my arms around his shoulders before he lifted me into his hold. 

"Christian is leading it today. I want to spend the day with you." He walked us over to the bathroom where the bathtub was full of soapy water. It smelled strongly of the floral scent I loved to use and I exhaled loudly when he lowered me into it. 

I leaned my head against the bathtub and closed my eyes briefly before opening them. I was in one of those moods where I couldn't do anything but be honest. Soul-baring kind of honest. "I'm happy with you—You make me happy."

He propped himself halfway on the sink that was beside the bathtub, extending his arm to c.a.r.e.s.s my hair. "That's all I ever want to do." He couldn't resist leaning down and pecking my lips. "Being able to hear your thoughts and know what's in your heart makes this all a lot easier to know that I'm the right man for you."

He elicited a smile from me and I pushed a thought into his mind. 

'Doesn't being my mate already tell you that?'

Tristan exhaled a quiet laugh. "I mean that I don't have to doubt myself around you. You love me and you don't have to say it for me to know." A gentle smile pulled at his rosy lips. "I see it with the way you look at me. The way you looked at when we made love…no one has ever looked at me like that."

I lifted an arm out of the soapy water and the droplets met the floor when I reached for his hand. "Because I'm the only one who is allowed to look at you like that." The possessive side to me reared its head when I thought back to how Mindy gazed at Tristan with love in her eyes. "You're  my mate."

He chuckled lowly, bringing my hand to his lips and pressing a kiss to my knuckles. "I'm yours, Kara. I'm always going to be yours."

I tugged on his hand with a shy smile. "Aren't you going to join me?"

He stood up but let go of my hand. "If we go for another round, you're going to fall asleep on me again. And I really do want to spend some quality time with you." He ended his response with a sweet kiss on my lips and I smiled softly at him. 

After he left the bathroom, I soaked in the hot water for a few more minutes before cleaning myself. I applied lotion and decided to put on the sweater he was wearing earlier. It smelled strongly of him but also had my own scent, which sent a satisfying feeling through me. 

I headed downstairs when I changed the bedsheets and found Tristan downstairs in the kitchen. He was reading over a couple of papers and looked up when he heard me. I closed the washing machine door and smiled before wrapping my arms around him. Something about it all felt domestic and I realised that every day could be like that. 

Full of love. I hugged him tighter when it dawned on me that I could have had that from the beginning. I wished I hadn't been so stupid. 

I pulled back slightly and tilted my head to look up at him. "How did you love me in the beginning?

Tristan cupped the back of my neck with his hand and a pained look crossed his face for the briefest of moments. "I couldn't help it. Maybe it would've hurt less if I didn't want you so bad. But I have never wanted anything as much as I want you. I thought of what we could have and told myself we would get there somehow." His expression turned soft. "We have that now."

My c.h.e.s.t pained at the reminder of every mean thing I had ever said. I had apologised more than once but I didn't think anything could excuse my words. "If I could do this all over again with you knowing what I do now…" I reached my hand up to lightly touch his face. 

"What would you do differently?" he gazed down at me and he seemed like he was holding his breath. 

"Well for starters, I would've kissed you right there in Ramiel's office." My lips slowly lifted into a grin. "And I would've told you just how breathtakingly handsome I thought you were."

Amus.e.m.e.nt shone in his eyes. "Why do I think that's not it?"

I slid my hand into the back pocket of his sweatpants and pulled him closer to me. "Of course that's not it. I kept thinking about how s.e.xy you would look out of your clothes."

He threw his head back and chuckled deeply. I watched his jovial facial expression and laughed with him. 

"Don't tell me you didn't think the same thing about me."

He laid a kiss on my lips as he grinned. "I definitely did. And I could barely control myself when I walked in on you changing. The doorknob is still dented from how hard I gripped it."

I thought back to all those weeks ago. It was my first night in Greenland and I remembered not being able to get him out of my head. Especially after I told him I would never choose him for anything. Oh, how wrong I was.

I forced those thoughts out of my head before I could ruin the lighthearted moment between us. 

"You were a tease too." I placed my other hand on his abdomen. "Never wearing a shirt. I think you wanted to make me crazy."

"I wanted to make you a lot of things." He brushed the tip of his nose against my cheek. "Want me…love me…all while making you come."

As the l.u.s.t struck through me violently, I almost pressed my lips to his before he craned his head back. They landed on his neck as he spoke. 

"The food is going to get cold, αγάπη μου." He gave me a teasing smile, laughing as he slipped past me and opened the oven. 

I couldn't stop the frown that made its way into my face. "You don't play fair." I reluctantly sat down in front of the island, staring at the marble top before he placed my plate of food in front of me. 

He was smiling as he pressed his lips to my cheek, wrapping his arms around my neck from behind. "I promise we'll have the entire night for that. I don't plan on letting you sleep."

I rested my head back on his shoulder and brought curled a hand around his forearm. "I'm going to hold you to that."

He pulled back after another kiss to my face and got his food before sitting in front of me. "Please do."

Choosing to clear my head of the l.u.s.tful thoughts, I concentrated on eating my food. It was silent for at least five minutes until I couldn't help but just stare at him. He still had a soft smile on his face from the laughs we had but there was a sense of tension under it all. Like something was still on his mind. 

"Are you ready to talk now?" I asked quietly, setting my cutlery down. 

Tristan glanced up at me and cleared his throat. His lips parted like he was going to speak but it seemed like he didn't know how to say it. He sighed and placed his fork down. 

"Your mother—she…" he sighed again. "We spoke about her life with Carew. It seemed to me that her relationship with him bordered on abusive. It's not surprising but I don't understand how someone could be so…so cold-hearted."

My heart dropped and I suddenly found myself grateful for how my life had turned out. I was glad that I grew up without a father. 

"He wrote to her during the war, days before I killed him. I was the subject of conversation." The anger flashed in his warm blue eyes and he stood up with the beginnings of a growl vibrating deep in his throat. "And your mother gave me the letter. The last thing Samuel Carew ever wrote to her."