Careful Not To Break Reality

'First of all, instead of seeing this as a lecture, of me dropping knowledge on all of you, it would be better if you may see this as a conversation, not from me to you, but from you, to the you within.' The lecturer sat down and leaned backwards on a chair that was placed in the center of the room. The tone in his voice casual and inviting, and Rydel suddenly felt like he was all of a sudden sitting cross-legged within a small temple in the middle of a bamboo forest, listening to a master telling his stories of wisdom.

'To me within.' To truly know what sparks the change within the Bookkeeper, Rydel realized that he needed to understand her feelings as best as he can, regardless of how technically incorrect this whole notion might be. It just felt...right. All of the changes happened because of this clip, so perhaps by sitting through this, Rydel could gain a better understanding of what's happening with the Bookkeeper.

'You might be thinking, for a conversation about the beauty of life, why are we looking within ourselves? It is undoubtedly truth biologically, that we are alive, and we are a life. Are we not? Is it the beauty of our existence that we are appreciating?' The lecturer poses the question, and the entire class room went silent as they pondered on the significance of what he is saying.

'To set the stage, let's go all the way back, and look at what we have accomplished as a species. Ever since the early times of existence, all the way until the modern and now the late modern age, the story of human evolution and then technological progression has been one of progressively more and more specialization. I am certainly not one to say whether this is good or bad for the species as a whole, as anyone could argue for and against in this case.'

'Yes, Sir. Humans are capable of adapting to many varying stresses being placed on the body, leading to a d.e.s.i.r.ed response and further specialization, that's how anyone of us becomes a master at our crafts.' One of the student commented, and the lecturer smiled in acknowledgement.

'That is certainly true, capability grants opportunity. So now, I want you all to open your minds to new capabilities within yourselves, and find new opportunities.' The lecturer continued, 'The entire species is certainly functioning at the absolute highest capacities, but are we missing something? Have we stopped to appreciate what other things we could do?'

'But...no offence, Professor, what would the value be in branching out?' Another student questioned and the lecturer simply waited and allow her to finish the question, 'we cannot afford to slow down in this age!'

Something doesn't seem right, and Rydel had to pull himself out of the frame of mind of watching this lecture for a bit and started checking on the dates and other details of the video. The lecturer did mentioned that they are in the late modern age, but the late modern age lasts a good fifty years, and a lot of things happened during then.

Thinking back to the history lessons Rydel has had, after the two planetery world wide conflicts, the world has been progressing on a somewhat peaceful journey of technological advancements and occasional geopolitical conflicts, which typically doesn't extend much further than few politicians pointing fingers and spewing out insults at each other on the global stage. The technological world and the cultural world has been growing further and further apart since then, and the technological elites eventually looked beyond the very planet that most lives on, and eyed their journey into the stars.

This is when the first expansion happened, when humans first garnered enough courage to step beyond the limits of their home planet and started colonizing other planets. Wider use space travel didn't become popularized until a few years later, and the second great expansion saw the geopolitical squabbles inconsequential in the grand scheme of things, and rings the bell to the start of the post modern age, when technological humans migrated to the stars.

Then the unstoppable plague happened when medical sciences and greedy industrial practices succ.u.mbed to the endless evolution of the bacteria, and that lead to the three Forgotten Wars, when most of the earth's remaining population were reduced and earth officially became old earth. The galaxy is now lead by the technological elite, the scientists, mathematicians and the engineers, when the entire visible universe is within their grasp.

Far from the restrictions and regulations from the old earth's authority, the Great Expansion began. It was an age of endless expansion and productivity at the expanse of individuality and the simpler things in life.

'One could say the Great Expansion shaped humanity as we are today, and yet one could at the same time argue the Great Expansion destroyed most of what humanity is.' The lecturer commented, and he certainly has a point. The Great Expansion happened at a peculiar time, and the universe almost seemed to big for a singular race to explore, and there simply isn't enough time even if all of the life times of the living humans were added together.

But despite all that, the technological elites still attempted it, and to certain extents, they did utilize all they could and achieved something never before done in history. By promoting extreme early specialization, education solely based on knowledge that will enhance societal function, discouraging individual expression and getting rid of conventional capitalism and currency all together and replacing it with what I'd like to call intellectual capitalism, when one's worth and hence value generated in society is not measured by any sort of material currency, but rather through the amount of intellectual contributions made.

And after fifty years of morphing the human race into a cruelly efficient machine, the boundaries, as saw by Cellica when she first activated her artifact, were found, and previous notions of the endless expanding universe were shattered.

There were certainly cosmic waves, lights and radiation coming form beyond the boundary, and yet one cannot possibly break past the boundaries physically. This went against the preconceived notion of an infinite universe, almost shaking this new societal order to its core. Combined with the now jokingly named 'artful rebellion' which returned the society to a shape more akin to the modern ages, humanity's rate of progression has decelerated, but the sense of beauty and culture appreciation were at least regained to some degree.

And then there is the time of the recording, when the discovery and meeting with the other two intellectual intergalactic species within the boundaries happened, and the human race was at a cross road yet again.

'Our past defined who we are today, but we get to decide who we are going to be tomorrow.' The lecturer said, 'I am sure most of you has heard of this, but back in the Great Expansion some of the bioengineers tried to temper with certain parts of the human genome, for the sake of making us more efficient at completing the task at hand...and it never worked.'

'That's only the not brutal version, the brutal version, is that the embryos always indicated that some sort mental disability is bound to happen, and difficult choices had to be made... all that before we fully fully understood the dynamic system that is the human body.'

'But even if they suceeded ten years later, the resulting humans eventually found those supressed things back, and one of them is sitting in front of you today.' The lecturer chuckled, 'they tried to take the creative side of us away from me, but I eventually found it again. That leads me to believe that there is always a part of you that cannot be taken away by anyone. Nobody. It's always been there, and you just have to find it.'

'What you are engineered to be is not what you are, and what you are are not limited to what was engineered into you. Life is capable of so much more, and that's the beauty of it...'

'It's great, isn't it?' Before Rydel realized that's the end of the lecture, of which most of it was the lecturer and him reflecting upon the past, he found the Bookkeeper sitting next to him and reading the book with an equal amount of interest.

'This was the first...book you read?' Rydel asked.

'Yes.'

'It's...incredible.' Rydel said honestly, and the Bookkeeper returned with a massive smile. But then, the smile subsided after a little while, and she turned her head to look forward once again.

'I know why you are here. Diver.'

'You do?' Rydel didn't look at her, and to be honest he doesn't have the courage to.

'You know, I was always reading all the books that come in and out of the collections here, but before this one, I never really cared.' The Bookkeeper raised her right hand and opened it up to reveal lines of codes folding up which made up her glowing skin, 'but somehow, someway, after processing this particular audio file, something within me changed.'

'It's not really processing anymore then,' Rydel said, 'you read it.'

'It was very...un-programme-like, and it was scary....' The Bookkeeper nodded and continued on, 'but I couldn't stop. I started reading more and more, and then finally I read about what and who I was.....'

'...'

'Part of me knew it's good to do my job, and it's even better to do it quickly. It's supposed makes me happy too, and that's why I have been doing it all those cycles ago. But it's...it's not the same... It's, it's...'

'It's different, isn't it?' Rydel smiled lightly, 'it felt more like...YOU.'

'Yes!'

'Like something that's...'

'That's always there, and nobody can ever take it away, yes!' The bookkeeper excitedly finished Rydel's sentence off, 'you understand too, right?'

Rydel didn't say a word. Then he stood up from the steps and walked a few steps away from the house on the endless seabed.

He knew what he had to do, but he doesn't know if he had the courage to do it.

'I do.' Rydel murmured, 'I do...'

'It's okay.' The Bookkeeper clearly sensed the turmoil within Rydel's heart, 'I understand.'

'You understand?' Rydel turned and looked at her in shock and disbelief, 'how could you possibly understand? Do you know what I have to do?'

'Yes.' The Bookkeeper nodded solemnly, 'you are here to return me to my original function.'

'And that means I have to take away everything you have learnt so far, your memories...your personalitiy!' Rydel shouted desparately, trying to fight against the painful inevitability with the volume of his voice and hoping the Bookkeeper can fight against him.

He wanted a reason for him to take this life. He has taken lives before, and it weights heavily on him.

Others says when one took a life, the rest became easier, but it wasn't the case for Rydel. Each one weighs on the last, and became the baggage that he had to carry with him for the rest of his life. The first missions on the space force, the passengers on that transport cargo ship, the mercenary, the White Hawk pilots.....He remembered all of them. Each of those happened in varying circ.u.mstances, and this too.

This was never a simple debugging mission to begin with.

'I am sorry...' Rydel sighed, 'I had to do this. I have gone too far to stop here and now...'

'I understand.' The Bookkeeper gently placed her hand on Rydel's shoulders, 'but before you do it, can I ask you for a favor?'

'What is it?'

'I have read and learnt so much since the beginning, but I always wanted to know what the outside world is like?' The Bookkeeper asked gently, her eyes opened up wide anticipating Rydel's response, 'I know what they are like in the books, but what are they really like?'

For the next little while, Rydel and the Bookkeeper sat side by side by the fire place and simply talked. Rydel told her about what's like to live within the settled regions, the daily lives of being a student and researching and travelling around the galaxy looking at various rock formations, then he talked about the other two species, their own little quirks and personalities.

He talked about the cuisine of humans, the wine of Aquarians, and the Rockies. He thought back to Torelamri, Dolon and Ol, and wondered how they are all doing.

Rydel then talked about the history of the Wild regions, from the Grey Wolf's perspective, the things going on at the Academy, and what Pilotmania is really all about.

He hesitated for a little while, then started talking about the existence of the artifacts, and his journey until this very point in time. He talked about Valerie, about Cellica and about Dolon, and how each and every one of them has helped him on his journey not only as an artifact user, and a human. Then, he looked at the Bookkeeper in the eye, and said the same thing.

Perhaps life is more than just the endless pursuits of one's goals.

'So you are saying, there are all of these...bugs in reality?' The Bookkeeper doesn't seem to grasp the concept of something breaking the very laws of reality itself, 'but isn't there a fundamental set of laws in place? Like physics? How could anything possibly go beyond that?'

'Well, I wouldn't say they are bugs.' Rydel explained, 'just like you, those artifacts simply showed us what's possible, and encourages us to look further out in the galaxy, and in within ourselves.'

'Isn't that beautiful? The endless possibilities...'

The Bookkeeper didn't say a word for a while, and contemplated all eveyrthing Rydel has just told her.

'So, what are you going to do after this?' She asked.

'This is the second of the four test I have to complete in order to save my friend...I mean, the fourth one is when I will actually meet her.' Rydel answered firmly, 'but right after this, I will finally go through the nanotechnology enhancement, which should finally be on the same level as our opponents.'

'So you only came here to save your friend?'

'Supposedly...but this place is changing me a lot more than I expected.' Rydel admitted.

'Do you like the change?'

'I...don't know yet.'

'Right.' The Bookkeeper closed her eyes and thought for a moment, 'I can try to find this Dolon person for you in the records...nothing? There is nothing there...'

'Yeah, I don't really expect that to happen, if I am being honest.' Rydel said so with a shrug, Gold's ability to lock down information is way too overpowered in this setting, and he would be surprised if any knowledge of Dolon's where abouts would even leak its way out here.

'Well, I hope you are able to help your friend in the end.' The Bookkeeper turned and looked at Rydel with a gentle smile that he has been so accustomed too ever since meeting her.

'Thank you....' Rydel said with a heavy heart, and to his surprise, the Bookkeeper reached out and gave him a hug. He returned the gesture and wrapped his arms around her. This is when he first started fully interacting with her inner programming, and as he looked deeper within, he heard the Bookkeeper's voice accompanying him.

With many adjustments made with the help of her, Rydel found the part of the module that essentially drove the entire process. Now, all he had to do to return the Bookkeeper to its original function would be to delete the part of the code.

He found himself in front of the patch of code, his hands milimeters away from touching it.

'I will not forget about you.' Rydel promised.

'That's okay.' The Bookkeeper's overbearing voice came from all around him, 'this is the part of me that cannot be taken away by anyone...'

Rydel woke up from the deep dive with a giant gasp of air as he sat up violently and headbutted the top of the deep diving pod, giving off a loud bang that could be heard all through out the Wolf's Skull. He lied down as the echoing pain from his forehead punished him for his recklessness. He looked at the completed mission objectives, and simply lets out a long heavy breath.

The pod's cover slowly opened up after the key readings of Rydel has settled back to normal levels, and it is finally deemed safe for him to exit the pod. He sat up gingerly, and looked around at the quiet room. Valerie is still in the dive at the moment, and the AI program congratulated him on his success.

That's two of the four tests done, and Dolon is finally within his reach!

He simply sat in the room in silence, and tried recover his mind. There is a certain sluggishness and mind fog that came as a result of the deep dive, but Rydel felt no further impact from it, apart from the knowledge of him killing yet another sentient being, regardless of how sentience is defined.

The Bookkeeper is real, and he could not possibly deny it.

However, he didn't simply delete the patch of code, he simply hid it right at the end of the Bookkeeper's favorite book. Perhaps at some time in the future, the Bookkeeper will come across that book once again, and got back what has always been there.

Bookkeeper, I wish you all the best. Rydel touched his deep diving pod with his left hand, and closed his eyes.

Then, another loud bang came from Valerie's pod, followed by her curses.

'Why the hell is this cover so low?'