Club Luna

Announcement This chapter marks the beginning of Book 3. It picks up the very next day after Interlude 22 / the end of Book 2.

content warning: brief mention of amnesia & divine influence

=::= Cass's PoV =::=

My parents and I had a new years tradition that went back as far as I could remember.

We'd sleep in, then stay in our pyjamas or nightgowns for the whole day. Mum would make us something fancy for brunch, then we'd get comfy together on the sofa and watch old movies on TV. Dinner would usually be left-overs from whatever we had for new years eve.

It was our fun little family thing, but this year things were different. This year it wasn't just three of us.

There was my little sister of course, but in addition to Nina the two wolfgirls also stayed overnight. Kaylee ended up sleeping over as well. So the house was full, but it didn't feel crowded. And we didn't have trouble finding everyone somewhere to sleep either.

It turned out that the sofa in mom's office folded out into a bed, which is where Melanie and Cerys slept. And my girlfriend originally volunteered to sleep on the sofa in the living-room, but when she and I finally turned in for the night at around two in the morning she ended up coming up to my room with me.

That was actually the first night we'd spent together, but nothing happened beyond a little bit of cuddling and a whole lot of blushing. At least, nothing happened that either of us would tell our parents about anyways. Needless to say there were some tired but happy faces when we all eventually got up on new years day.

At about half past eleven we all gathered in the kitchen for brunch. Mum made a huge batch of pancakes and bacon, and there was coffee and juice and soda and water so everyone had plenty to eat and drink. And when all that was done, me and Nina did the dishes while our friends helped tidy up the house and stuff.

It wasn't until half past one in the afternoon that it seemed like the party was finally over. Melanie and Cerys decided to head for home, so mum offered to drive them but they didn't mind walking. It turned out that werewolfs don't feel the cold like humans do, and they were both feeling a little energetic and wanted to stretch their legs and stuff.

The two wolfgirls thanked me and Nina and especially our parents for having them over and for all the food and kindness and everything. Then they headed off together holding hands, which I thought was really cute.

After they were gone Kaylee figured it was time for her to head home too. And since she lived just around the block she also turned down the offer of a drive. She thanked our parents for the party and breakfast and everything, then she and I hugged and kissed before she finally set out as well.

And just like that it was only the four of us.

"So what next?" I asked. "Back to our usual new years day stuff? Old movies while we relax together on the sofa?"

Mom and mum exchanged a look, then mum shook her head. "Not just yet hon. There's a couple conversations we've been putting off for the past two weeks, but your mom and I think it's time we sat down with you and discussed a few things."

That didn't sound good, and I couldn't help cringing slightly. "Uh, what kind of conversations? What do you want to talk about?"

Rather than get right to it we got some refreshments first. Mom and mum made themselves fresh coffee, while me and Nina got mugs of hot chocolate. Then once the four of us were seated in the living-room and everyone was comfortable, mum started things off.

"The first thing we need to discuss Cassandra is your new status," she began. "Based on our understanding of what Socha planned to do with you, what you told us you did to protect yourself, and what actually happened when Brian attempted to complete the rituals last month..."

When her voice trailed off mom took over, "Cass hon, we know you gained access to Socha's power. And you know we have some experience working with gods. We're concerned that you've acquired more from her than just her power. We think you've probably replaced her completely."

Mum finally came out and said it, "Your mom and I are pretty sure you've become a goddess. You may have even taken over Socha's domain, as the new goddess of chaos."

By that point I was blushing and cringing, and instead of facing anyone I mostly just stared down at the mug of hot cocoa I was cradling in my hands.

"Cass?" mom asked softly. "Do you know if we're right? If you're not sure, maybe your mum and I can try and help you figure things out?"

I sighed and had a sip of my warm drink, then mumbled "You're right. I didn't just get her power. I've taken her place completely. But I don't..."

My voice trailed off as I noticed how my little sister was reacting to the conversation. I turned and pulled her into a hug as I apologized, "Nina I'm sorry. I know she was your friend for a long time, even if you were upset with some of the things she did."

She hugged me back as she replied softly, "It's ok Cass. It's not your fault."

"Nina honey I'm sorry too," mum apologized. "Your mom and I should have been much more sensitive to your feelings when we brought this up."

My little sister just nodded quietly as she and I continued holding each other, until she eventually prompted me to continue. "You were saying something Cass, about taking Socha's place?"

"Yeah," I sighed. I let go of her and had another sip of my cocoa, then got back to what I was saying earlier. "I really don't want to be a chaos goddess. Or any other kind of goddess? I just want to be myself."

Mum gave me a sympathetic look as she responded, "Your mom and I understand that hon. And we're glad you don't want to let this change you. But like it or not, this does change things. And it could continue to change things, if you're not careful. Gods need faith or worship to thrive, and with Brian banished from the Earth there might not be any mortals left to sustain you. I think -"

"There's others," I interrupted, although I was still sort of mumbling. "It wasn't just him."

My parents glanced at each other again, then mom said "Two or three people may seem like a lot, and that's definitely enough to keep you going hon. But it might not -"

I interrupted again, but like before I spoke quietly and kept my eyes fixed on my hot chocolate. "There's a few thousand people worldwide who actively believe in a modern incarnation of Chaos. It started four or five decades ago as an offshoot of Discordianism. They don't use the name Socha, but their beliefs align close enough to her domain that their faith is now flowing into me."

My voice got even quieter as I continued, "There's also ninety-four people who's faith feeds me more directly. And about a quarter of them even perform regular rites which amount to deliberate worship."

My parents and sister were all temporarily shocked by those numbers. It took a few seconds before mum finally commented, "That's... That's a lot more than any of us would have guessed. Those numbers would rocket you well past someone like May Hawthorne."

"I know," I mumbled. Then I sighed, "Except I don't want to be a goddess of chaos, I don't want to be a goddess at all. And I really don't want to take Socha's place. I just want to be me."

There was another long pause, but this time it was mom who broke the silence. "Cass? Those ninety-four people you mentioned, are they the people who used those plush toys?"

I nodded as my cheeks heated up again, "Yes."

Mum sighed, "That was the second thing we wanted to talk with you about hon. We know a little bit about those toys, after what happened back in June with May and the hospital. So we know they're based on Socha's magic, and obviously they're connected to her. We also know that you supplied the plush toys that transformed both Kirstie and Kathie Winters."

Mom asked, "Where did you get those two toys from? And do you know who originally made them, or where they came from?"

That had me cringing and blushing again, and I stalled a bit by gulping down the rest of my hot chocolate. I knew I had to tell them the truth though, there was no point lying or trying to hide it anymore.

"The actual toys came from some company in China," I replied quietly. "It was Socha's idea, but she had me do all the work. Except for some reason I could never remember that I was working for her? I guess I was only aware of it while I was actually doing the work. Then when it was over I'd forget again. I think maybe I figured it out once or twice over the past six months, but I kept forgetting. I didn't really get access to all those memories until after Brian did the ritual and removed those containment runes in my chest."

My family were all silent again as that sank in. Meanwhile I continued telling them about where the plushies came from.

"It started last February," I said softly. "I ordered two hundred and fifty of those little toys, and they got here in April. I enchanted about half of them at the time, but I didn't exactly follow Socha's instructions. I modified the enchantments to make sure the plushies would only do what people wanted, so they wouldn't make anyone unhappy. Then I set them up in a couple vending machines. One here, one in Toronto, and one at a truck stop near London. I also enchanted the machines, so they'd only give people the plushies that were most suitable for them."

Mom asked nervously, "Last February? But the second circle wasn't broken until June. That means..."

"Yeah," I nodded slowly. "Socha was influencing me over my entire life. Or, not exactly Socha, not directly? But there was a little piece of her inside that shard? Like a little part of her soul was left behind when she was banished, and that piece of her influenced me and talked to me in my sleep and stuff. It told me to make the plushies and it even taught me how to do it."

I added, "It's gone now. That little piece of her, when Brian did the ritual that little piece inside me died. Or maybe it rejoined the rest of her in exile? Either way it's gone now. Socha's gone, and she has no way to ever come back."

While my parents digested that information I continued answering the original question, "After May got involved back in June I ended up taking the rest of the toys out of the vending machines again. I started distributing them by mail instead, directly to people who wanted them. Mostly to trans people, since the toys can deliver an instant magical transition? Some cis folks want them too, they like the idea of being demi-human, or they want the other benefits they can get from the plushies. So I'm still distributing them one or two at a time by mail. I've got about seventy-five left now, out of the original two hundred and fifty."

Once again my family needed a few seconds to process all that. Then mum asked, "You still have seventy-five of them? Where are you keeping them all?"

"They're in a box in my closet," I replied quietly. "You won't be able to see them or find them though, the box has been enchanted to render it undetectable to anyone who isn't me."

Despite how quiet and embarrassed and uncomfortable I was, my answer made it pretty clear that I was going to keep giving them away. I had mixed feelings about some parts of the whole situation, but I still wanted to help trans people. And I figured with the instructions and warnings and stuff, people would be able to decide for themselves whether or not to take advantage of the magic.

The only thing that was a bit underhanded was how using the toys was the same as performing a rite in my honour, so everyone who was transformed by one of those toys became one of my worshipers. And the more they used their toys, the more faith or worship I got from them.

Like I told Kaylee though, I could live with the guilt since I felt like it was a fair trade. They got their instant transition and everything, and it didn't cost them anything. It didn't hurt them in any way either.

"All right hon," mom finally responded. "I can tell this is important to you. We're not going to try and stop you or take them away or anything like that. There are some practical concerns though, and that brings us to the third thing we wanted to talk with you about."

She kind of had her mom-voice on again as she continued, "Last month you gave one of those toys to Kirstie Winters, which she gave to her wife. Now both parents of that family are demi-human teenagers, and they need your help."

Then she gave me a firm look and stated, "Tomorrow afternoon you and I are going over there to meet with Kirstie and Kathie. You are going to find out what they need, and you're going to help them. I know you don't want to be a goddess hon, but you have the power, and their predicament is your responsibility."

I slumped down a bit on the sofa and sighed, "I guess. It's not like they didn't know what would happen if they used the plushies though. I included instructions and warnings and everything with them."

That turned out to be everything they wanted to talk about, but I had a feeling we'd be revisiting those first two topics again at some point. Like I was pretty sure they still had some concerns about the whole enchanted plush toy thing, and I was positive there were more conversations in my future about inheriting Socha's power and title and stuff too.

For now, there was another difficult topic I wanted to discuss. Not with my parents though, but with my sister. So with the big family conversation over, I asked Nina if I could talk with her in private for a bit. We ended up going upstairs to her room, while mom and mum both got themselves more coffee then relaxed in the living-room.

"So what did you want to talk about Cass?" my little sister asked. The two of us were sitting side by side on her bed, and we'd closed her door behind us for a little extra privacy.

I gave her an apologetic look as I replied, "I was hoping maybe we could talk a little about Socha? I know she took advantage of you and manipulated you sis, but I also know she was your friend for a long time."

Nina frowned slightly. She looked maybe a little uncomfortable or uncertain as she asked, "What did you want to know about her?"

"I'm not sure?" I shrugged. "I guess, I'm wondering what she was like? How long were you friends with her? What sort of stuff did you and she do, before she got herself banished? How'd you meet? That sort of thing."

I added a moment later, "That's only if it's not too difficult to talk about, ok? I don't want to make you uncomfortable. It's just, even if she wasn't a good friend she was still your friend. And obviously I'm connected to her too, that's another reason I'm curious about her."

"Ok Cass," Nina replied quietly. She had a thoughtful look on her face as she stared down at the floor for a half minute or so.

Finally she took a deep breath then with her eyes still on some spot on the floor she began, "We met towards the end of summer in eighteen-twelve, near Smolensk. She was playing games with Napoleon's army, spreading some chaos around. I'd been helping the civilians in Smolensk by consuming their nightmares after the French artillery bombed and burned the city. I'd never met a goddess before, and she'd never met a demon. We were both cautious but curious, and I guess she seemed nice? She was friendly and playful..."

For the next hour or so Nina told me about how she and Socha became friends and what the chaos goddess was like. I learned that Socha appeared as a girl of about my age, between eighteen and twenty years old. The humans who met her saw her as an attractive but innocent or naive young woman.

She told me how Socha was really nice to her at first, but she also soon realized her new friend tended to keep a lot of secrets. There were even times she figured out Socha was lying to her, but whenever Nina asked about it Socha had an answer or an excuse that made it seem ok.

After they first met the two of them spent the next century travelling around Europe. There were plenty of wars and stuff, and Nina would feed on the nightmares people got from the conflict while Socha spread chaos by messing with the armies. Like she'd break their equipment or mess with their maps so they'd get lost or stuff like that. Every couple years Socha would return to visit her mother in England, but Nina wouldn't go with her. She avoided visiting the British Isles for the same reason she stayed away from the Mediterranean, powerful demons lived in those places.

She mentioned after one such visit home, Socha returned to see Nina again with a new friend in tow. Brian was a young fae, and Nina immediately hated him. He had a cruel streak, and when Socha was with him her pranks and chaos tended to be darker and nastier. After that Socha divided her time between her two friends, but rarely brought them all together since they didn't get along. So Nina only got to spend time with her friend on and off, there were months or years at a time when Socha was off doing her own thing or hanging out with Brian.

Eventually my little sister got to the end, "It was around a hundred years ago when she hatched her grand scheme to thwart the status-quo. She convinced me and Brian to help, she said we were going to make the world a better place. She told me there'd be small sacrifices, but she promised I wouldn't have to do anything horrible. I agreed, and she gave me all the notes and stuff she'd prepared. Then she went and got herself exiled and... I guess you know the rest after that."

At that point I pulled her into a hug, "Thanks Nina. I really appreciate it, and I hope it wasn't too hard for you to talk about her?"

"It's ok Cass," she replied quietly as she hugged me back. "It wasn't too bad, but I don't want to think about her anymore right now. Let's go back downstairs ok?"

"Sounds like a good idea," I agreed.

We both got ourselves some more hot chocolate, then joined our parents watching old movies in the living-room. And I couldn't help thinking even though it was really different from past new years days, and the heavy conversations weren't great, it was still a pretty good day.

From waking up with my girlfriend to brunch with family and friends to old movies with my sister and our parents, it was a nice start to the new year. And maybe the beginning of some brand-new traditions.

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