Comic Book Guy!

James woke up in a big bed that seemed empty. He stretched out and thought about checking out the latest news on his phone, he looked over at the side table that was three feet beyond his reach and frowned, he held his hand out and the phone flew to it fitting snugly in his hand he looked at the phone in disbelief. He looked around for something else and saw a glass of water out on the table on the other side of the huge bedroom. He once again held out his hand and reached out to the glass and it flew into his hand snugly. He laughed excitedly and said, "I am your father." While breathing heavily.

The mysterious beautiful woman walked into his bedroom and giggled, "You done playing Jedi yet?"

James blushed and then said, "Don't you ever knock?"

She thought for a moment and then said, "No, not really, get dressed. We're going to start your training." She walked out of the room, the sound of her heels cl.i.c.k.i.n.g over the tile floor letting him know she was waiting in the next room.

James went to the closet and looked at the clothes that were offered. He was surprised to find that they were all clothes he would normally choose for himself. At the back of his closet, he found a heavy suit of kevlar armor similar to something from one of the Batman comics. He grinned happily and put it on. It was exactly the kind of suit he always imagined for a superhero. Instead of tights with u.n.d.e.r.w.e.a.r on the outside, it was practical. He put it on and then walked out to where the lady was waiting. She laughed as he walked into the room and said, "You are such an edge lord. Do you need a cape too?"

James smirked at her and used the Batman voice to say, "I'm not the hero you deserve, I am the hero you need."

She laughed at his joke and then said, "So, yeah, the first few days of training will be on things like academics, useful skills like medical training, accounting, dental training, science, and architecture. You know, boring stuff. So if you want to dress like Darth Vader, it might be a little overkill. Maybe just a t-shirt and jeans or something, you know?"

James chuckled and then said, "Ha. Ha. By the way, what's your name?"

She looked at him like he was crazy and then asked, "Wait, you looked through my memories but didn't even bother to remember my name? Gross."

James turned bright red and said, "I've never been with a girl, you can't blame me, it was like a moth seeing a flame!" He raised his finger as if he were completely vindicated thanks to his v.i.r.g.i.n.i.t.y.

She broke out into laughter and then said, "My name is Angela. Angela Hale. They all call me the Red Queen now though."

James nodded and then said, "Because your hair is red?"

She shook her head and said, "No because my number is red."

James thought for a moment and then asked, "Does that make me the Red King?"

She shook her head and said, "No, right now you are just James Crosby, a guy who collects comic books. So, I guess you are Comic Book Guy?"

James frowned at her and said, "Worst. Superhero. Name. Ever."

She laughed again and said, "I'm gonna be sad if you die during training." She laughed and then walked toward the elevator.

James looked a little startled and asked, "Wait did you just say die? I thought this was academic training?" He followed behind her just barely making it to the elevator before the doors closed and then reopened almost instantly.

She gave him a little push out the door and grinned at him, "Work at your own pace, don't worry about the others."

James looked confused as the doors closed, "Wait, others?"

The doors closed a loud male voice boomed from behind him, "Hey comic book guy, get your a.s.s over here and crack a book. One with words in it, not pictures."

James turned around and glared at the man who yelled. He was a tall brutal looking man in a suit and tie. He had a rough scar across his face and gave off an aura as if he had walked through a battlefield full of dead and dying men and survived it through guts and skill. The man walked up to him and looked down on him saying, "In a few weeks, you'll scare me, but right now, you're just a little lamb ready for slaughter in front of me so wipe that glare off your face and have a seat. We only have a short time here and you have already wasted five minutes of my time with you."

James sat down next to a few random people. Some people were young, even one child, while others were much older than him. They looked like ordinary people in his eyes. They looked at his well-muscled frame and seemed to be afraid it was them that was unprepared. James picked up a book and started to flip through the pages. It didn't look like he was even reading the books. He finished one book after another. As he finished a stack of books another was brought over. The other people in the class thought he was making fun of them after a while. An older man slammed his current book closed and called out, "Can you please do something about the man that isn't reading and is just flipping through these books. It's distracting."

The tall brutal man walked over and picked up one of the books James discarded and growled out, "Page 135, second paragraph. Recite it, comic book guy."

The tall brutal man put the book in front of the man who called out James. James recited, "A system is said to be in stable equilibrium if, when displaced from equilibrium, it experiences a net force in a direction opposite to the direction of the displacement. For example, a ball bearing at the bottom of a bowl will experience a restoring force when displaced from its equilibrium position. This force moves it back toward the equilibrium position. Most systems are in stable equilibrium, especially for small displacements."

The older man looked at James with eyes that showed real fear. The tall brutal man said loudly, "That man is a red. Even you purples can't imagine just how powerful his mind is so don't pay any attention to his reading. This isn't a race, it's an opportunity for each of you to become more than you are. Comic book guy here will just become more than any of us in this room is all."

James said, "My name is James, not Comic Book Guy."

The tall brutal man roared at him, "Shut up comic book guy, you can have your own name once you get to the top of the tower. You're on the first floor right now, you might as well be the fry cook at Burger Kang, cause that's all you're worth."

James suddenly had a flashback to working at his last job. His manager yelling at him for cooking the fries too long because the oil was not hot enough thanks to the overuse of the fryer during a rush. James licked his lips and dug back into his reading. This time with even more focus.

Over the next few days, all he did was read. Book after book. Sometimes a teacher would come and check on his progress with an exam. At set times of the day, the group would have their reading interrupted for food and exercise. By the end of the week, James was at the Ph.D. level in most subjects. He understood the law like a well-practiced attorney and understood medical science better than most doctors. His old life started to feel distant and unworthy of his time. Thanks to his newfound knowledge of psychology he understood why comic books had been such an important part of his life. Knowledge is great, but it really sucks the fun out of things when you start to understand your own greater motivations.

The tall brutal man walked over and closed the book in front of James. He bellowed, "Comic Book Guy, you're done. Take the elevator to the next floor."

James got up and walked over to the elevator. Once again the elevator doors barely closed before opening up to the next floor. James started to wonder if the elevator was even real. It was almost more of a teleportation device like something found in Star Trek. He decided he would ask Angela the next time they met. He walked out into a gym. Standing next to a speed bag wearing workout clothes was an older Asian woman. She smiled as he approached and asked, "Hi, are you Comic Book Guy?"

James held out his hand and said, "James Crosby."

The woman took his hand and then James found himself being flipped over on to his back. Her foot smashed down on his throat and she said in a very nice pleasant sounding voice, "Shut the f.u.c.k up Comic Book Guy, you get to have your own name once you reach the top floor, didn't anyone teach you that downstairs?"

James choked out, "Sorry, I think they did mention that."

She pulled him back up to his feet and said, "You have all these muscles but you move like someone who doesn't even know how to throw a punch. Anyone looking at you can tell you have no idea how to fight. You are a walking target."

James nodded and said, "I've never really been in a fight. I used to get pushed around a lot though."

She made a derisive noise and then gave him a slap on the cheek, "You better learn how to fight quick, otherwise you won't live to see the next weekend. Today is the only day I'll be nice, after that you need to be prepared to fight for your life the moment you walk through the door."

James nodded and then asked, "Is there a book I need to read?"

She nodded and said, "Yes right here", she pointed down and as James looked her knee came up and smashed into his face. He stumbled backward and then she shouted at him, "You're so stupid! What book? This is fighting not math."

James stumbled around and said, "I think my nose is broken."

She said, "Let me see it." She grabbed his face and then painfully pushed his nose back in its slot. "It's just a little broken, so quit crying." She stomped on his foot and said, "Right foot here." She stomped on his left foot and said, "Left foot here. Balance, use your core." She gave him a push and he stayed still as a rock. "See? This is a stance. You will not be able to get into a stance against a real opponent, but you need to learn them."

James was beaten over and over again by the woman but slowly started to gain both muscle memory and the skill to defend himself over the course of the day. By the evening he was able to start making his own strikes. On one of his strikes, he even managed to graze her cheek hard enough to leave a mark. She nodded and smiled and said, "Good, good. You are ready. Tomorrow when you walk through the door I will try my best to kill you. You have to try your best to knock me out."

James frowned and then said, "Wait, shouldn't I try to kill you too?"

She laughed at him and then said, "Maybe just try to hit me first." She patted the top of his head like he was a child.

James went up to his room. He still had a few hours before bed so he got on the internet and started to study fighting. He found videos from hundreds of different sources and studied how people moved and attacked. He matched it up with what he was taught during the day and realized that he had huge gaps in his knowledge. He tried to find videos of people fighting with their lives on the line but could only find prize fights between people trying to knock each other out. When he finally did find some life or death fights, the fighters were below the level he needed to study.

James frowned hard and then started to practice the moves he had learned earlier in the day and mixed in what he had learned from watching real fighters professionally fighting. He knew that he was still telegraphing his strikes and not able to discern the difference between a feint and a real strike. He also noticed that he was still too reliant on his stances. His teacher had warned him already that a real opponent wouldn't let you have your stance or allow you to create your own spacing. His experience ticked away quickly as he trained. His skills started to attain some real polish. He could throw proper feints and could keep his balance even when his stance fell apart. He didn't feel ready for a real battle, but he was a decent enough fighter to survive an ambush and run away.

The next morning not knowing what he would be stepping into, he decided to wear his armored suit including the helm. He also brought a sword. His swordsmanship wasn't perfect but he watched and practiced enough Kendo to be able to guard against life-threatening sword attacks.

He got into the elevator and before the door closed climbed up to the ceiling. When the door opened a sword strike flashed through the opening. James jumped down and struck out with his own sword. On the other side of the door rather than his teacher, he found a room full of assailants all wearing masks. They started to come at him in waves. They had obviously practiced their teamwork, but James moved through them like a ghost. He wasn't striking to kill them, only to disable so each person he passed would fall to the floor screaming in pain until he made his way out of the doorway area and into the main room. Once he was safely in the main room three people stepped forward as the others fell back. They came at him as one unit. Fighting seamlessly. Their swordsmanship was far beyond what James could handle so he slowly fell back to the elevator area rather than engage them he would instead parry and feint, only defending against their attacks as he learned from their speed and attack angles. He started to see their attacks before they came. Eventually, he was able to start pressing them back with his own attacks that found the seams in what he originally saw as seamless swordplay.

James suddenly had an idea. He realized that he was fighting them on even terms instead of with his own advantages. He started to use his mind to trip them up and to attack them from behind. The three that were trying to kill him started to panic. James was even going as far as to tap into their consciousness to make them see things that weren't there. The more he used his power the more he realized the sword in his hand was useless to him. He cast it aside and started to really unleash his power. He lifted them off the ground and held them floating unable to move. He picked up the rest until every person in the room was held up in the air at once.

The teacher came flying out and started yelling, "You are all so stupid, why did you treat him like a normal person? You know that he is red. You need to bring something he can't stop like this." She pulled out a gun and fired a bullet right at his head. James knew that the bullet would reach him before he could find it, so instead, he imagined the air hardening until the bullet became encased in the solid air. Then he simply reached out and collected the bullet. He showed it to his teacher and asked, "Next floor?"

She nodded and said, "You might not be ready, but I think this floor has already served its purpose." He walked over to the elevator and watched the doors close. She waved and said, "Good luck."

He found himself back in his room when the doors opened. He walked in and collapsed on his bed. He found himself doing some breathing exercises to calm his body and mind. Then he got up and stripped off his armor before heading into the bathroom for a shower. He had taken a few hits in the melee so he made sure to care for each of his wounds carefully. Thinking about his powerful mind, he looked at the wounds and imagined what was happening down to the cellular level in the wound. He realized he had the ability to seal the wounds in real time. As long as he had focus, he could change anything he understood well enough to visualize. To practice, he changed the color of his eyes and the color of his hair. He thought about the rest of his body. He imagined his bones becoming as hard as steel. His muscles becoming so dense that he gained hundreds of pounds in an instant. He laughed, "Of course, that's what she was trying to teach me. I need to understand the world so that I can bend it to my will."

The more he manipulated reality the easier it became. He was able to change clothes with a thought. He could change the look of the room, he was even able to summon his comic book collection back into existence. He laughed long and loud as he looked through issue after issue of his favorite series. He shook his head and said, "There really is no purpose in collecting comic books for me anymore is there? I just need to memorize a book and then I can reproduce it with a thought. That really takes the fun out of it." He sighed.

Angela's voice came from right beside him, "That's true. For us, the world is not the same as it is for them. That's why we are needed, James. Without people like you and I, someone who has no empathy for humanity will simply walk around removing them one at a time. I can do that too, but put them back together? Impossible."

James nodded and said, "Some people just have an evil side to them, you can't reason with them, you can only try to stop them before they do too much harm."

Angela smiled and nodded, "Exactly right. I have followed your progress through the training, I think you are almost ready to see the real thing. But first I want you to find the man that blew up your apartment. He is a purple, a very dangerous purple. To you and I, he is merely an ant, but to the people of New City, he is a terror of unlimited power. I think that will be a good test for you. After you complete this task, we'll pick out your name and your costume."

James nodded and said, "Alright. That sounds like a good plan."