Daomu Biji: The Southern Archives

Chapter 18: The Plague God’s Kiss

The policemen looked at each other and then laughed. “Why so anxious? Doing obscene activities during the daytime?”

He Jianxi’s face was flushed, but it was because he was angry and frightened.

When did he have a woman in his bed?

He was positive that there definitely wasn’t anyone else under the quilt just now. Zhang Haiyan was the one who got under it. He saw it with his very own eyes. How did he suddenly become a woman?

Could it be that Zhang Haiyan was a man disguised as a woman? Wait, that couldn’t be right. Wasn’t he half-naked just now?

He Jianxi was utterly perplexed. Moreover, what did he say to him just now? He would claim he was his accomplice? There was too much information, which almost made He Jianxi break out in a cold sweat.

The policemen just thought that the kid was being shy, and they ended up laughing even harder. Then, they heard the woman under the quilt say, “It’s not daytime. There’s no such thing as daytime in the world.”

“You even dared touch a woman on this kind of boat. Watch out, or you might get syphilis.” The police lowered the curtain and continued their investigation.

He Jianxi listened to the sound of the policemen walking away. He wanted to flip the quilt over immediately to see what was going on, but when he turned around, Zhang Haiyan had already returned to his previous position. Not even his cigarette had been extinguished.

Zhang Haiyan looked at him coldly. “You don’t know how to lie to people. How have you even survived up until now?” He was still talking in that sultry female voice.

He Jianxi looked at Zhang Haiyan’s chest. Well, he had never seen a woman’s chest since he had started to learn the ways of the world, but in his mind, a woman’s chest was bound to have something. Zhang Haiyan’s chest, however, had nothing but pectoral muscles.

Zhang Haiya looked like all of the men he had seen before.

Is it possible that he’s one of those intersex people (1) I’ve heard about before?

He Jianxi’s mind was blown. At that time, he didn’t understand the concepts of gender equality. His first reaction was that an intersex person had slept in his bed. He didn’t know if it was because his head had been hit earlier, or because he couldn’t handle the situation before him, but he started to feel dizzy.

Zhang Haiyan touched his bed and said, “How am I supposed to sleep on this? I found that your bed was very comfortable as I lay on it just now. Can we sleep together? I’ll only be staying here for a few days anyways.”

His voice sounded beautiful and charming, as if he was the only orchid in an empty valley.

He Jianxi tilted his head and fainted on the bed.

Zhang Haiyan sat there stunned for a while. It was his first time seeing someone faint while he was still talking to them.

He sighed.

At this time, he heard the sound of the Nan’an’s horn. He looked out from a crack in the boat’s planking, and saw the Nan’an’s chimneys emitting smoke. It seemed like the ship was about to set sail.

Damn it. Zhang Haiyan knocked on the boat planks. There were police officers outside, so he couldn’t leave yet. And it was still bright out, so he couldn’t get into the water again, either.

In any case, he’d have to wait until evening to find a way. Moreover, it was impossible for the barge to keep up with the iron ship’s speed, even if he hijacked it to chase after the Nan’an.

He didn’t know if Zhang Ruipu’s men had seen him diving into the water just now. If they did, he was worried that Haixia would be in danger.

He closed his eyes and began to recall the old sea map from the conference room that contained information on the various sea routes. His mind raced through it quickly and it only took him a short amount of time to find that he still had one more chance.

If the Nan’an departed now, it would go to the deep-water port in Singapore and then turn back.

The route to San Francisco and the route to Xiamen were headed in the same direction. Brother Long had told him that the Baoen would set off at dusk, so based on his calculations, they would enter the open sea earlier than the Nan’an.

As long as he dove into the area where the coastal water met the open sea, he could float on the Nan’an’s route. If he was lucky, the Nan’an would arrive an hour after that. Although it was impossible to estimate the distance between the two ships accurately at that point, it wouldn’t be more than four kilometers.

In addition, it might happen tomorrow at midnight when the surrounding sea was dark and the lights on the Na’an would be bright. He could swim toward it.

The iron ship moved very fast, so he had only one chance to swim right in front of it and wait for it to come. The Nan’an had very steep sides, so he’d have to find a way to climb up. All of this could only be done if there weren't any accidents.

Zhang Haiyan really regretted his reckless behavior, and swore secretly that if the gods had mercy on him this time, he would be extra cautious in the future.

When He Jianxi woke up again at dusk, Zhang Haiyan was no longer across from him. There were various sounds outside that were noisy, but they were different from before. Moreover, the ship was shaking badly. He immediately checked his waistband, and felt relieved when he found that the money was still there.

He left the small cabin and understood why the sounds had changed. It was because they had already set off. The voices on the shore were no longer audible, the sea breeze was stronger, and the half-sail had been lowered to full-sail.

The people on the ship had become quiet as they tried to adapt to their new life at sea. Whether it was comfortable or not, this broken ship would be their home for the next few months.

The sea at dusk was very beautiful. The waves were neither big nor small, and the ship looked strangely beautiful under the soft light.

Where is that intersex person? Was it just a dream? No. My silver coins are still gone.

He Jianxi was captivated by the dusk and the setting sun in the distance. At this moment, he suddenly didn’t want to think about anything else. I’ll just appreciate the beautiful scenery first, even though I know I’ll face this same scene every day for the next few months.

As he was thinking this, he suddenly heard a clacking sound coming from off to the side. He turned and saw the intersex person playing mahjong with a few passengers.

Fuck, it wasn’t a dream after all.

Zhang Haiyan had just won. He flipped the tiles and waited for the passengers to give him the money. There were a lot of silver coins sitting in front of him, and the sailors were all watching him very closely.

He Jianxi walked over. Once Zhang Haiyan saw him, he counted out a pile of silver coins and handed them to him. “Take them. I’ve returned the money to you.” With that said, he counted out another pile of silver coins for Brother Long. “Brother Long, here. Give them to your brothers.”

Brother Long had obviously been rewarded more than once, for he took them and said, “How generous of you!”

Zhang Haiyan put a cigarette between his lips. “My cousin isn’t sophisticated, so he’ll definitely bring some trouble to Brother Long. Please take care of him.”

Brother Long immediately took out a match and lit the cigarette for Zhang Haiyan. “Don’t worry, Brother Yan, I didn’t know you were such a great man before. If I had known you were Mr. Ruipu’s apprentice, I wouldn’t have been so presumptuous.”

“Remember to keep the things that I’ve written. When my cousin arrives in San Francisco, you can take the slip and go to Mr. Zhang Ruipu to get the money. It’s a simple errand. Don’t mess it up.”

Brother Long nodded. His behavior was so flattering that it was almost sickening.

He Jianxi was puzzled as he looked at the silver coins. “You won these. I want my own money back.”

“You and your money are already that familiar with each other? Do you have feelings for it?” Zhang Haiyan laughed. “Brother Long. Look at this kid. He’s Mr. Zhang Ruipu’s accountant. He’ll never do anything wrong. He’s a piece of work, isn’t he?”

“Yes, he is. He’s a piece of work.”

Zhang Haiyan handed the silver coins to Brother Long and asked him to pass them to He Jianxi, who finally accepted them. He immediately gripped the coins tightly before he turned around to leave.

Zhang Haiyan won again this time.

The passenger on the side was covered in a cold sweat and going crazy. He glanced at the other passengers. A middle-aged woman came up to pull him away. “Stop it, old man. You’ll lose everything if you keep going.”

The passenger shook the woman off. “Go away. I’m losing because you can’t fucking stop talking.” With that said, he took out another silver coin and looked at Zhang Haiyan.

He Jianxi felt like something was wrong. He raised his hands and sniffed them, and found the faint smell of turmeric. He turned around, looked at Zhang Haiyan’s hands, and instantly became furious when realized what was going on.

When he went back again and saw that Zhang Haiyan had a set of good tiles in his hands, he immediately asked him, “You’re cheating?”

Zhang Haiyan was stunned. He Jianxi grabbed his hands and smelled them. That’s right. It’s the smell of turmeric.

“He has turmeric,” he said to everyone. “He’s cheating by marking these tiles with it. Whose money here isn’t hard-earned? If you cheat and steal their money like this, they’ll die. You’re treating these people improperly. Are you not afraid of the plague god coming after you?!”

Everyone looked at Zhang Haiyan, who was dumbfounded in the face of He Jianxi’s accusations. But before he got the chance to answer, the passenger on the side grabbed Zhang Haiyan’s collar and cried, “You’re cheating?!”

Zhang Haiyan was knocked over by a punch. He Jianxi also fell since Zhang Haiyan bumped into him. Then he saw the other three mahjong players get up and surround Zhang Haiyan.

Brother Long immediately came to help Zhang Haiyan up, but the other passengers gathered around to watch the scene. The sailors and the passengers were suddenly divided into two factions.

“You sailors are working with this liar to cheat and steal our money while we’re on the boat. You better give us an explanation today, and return our money to us!” The leading gambler yelled.

The other people on the boat had been bullied by the sailors before and were already very angry, so they immediately agreed.

He Jianxi was overjoyed as he saw everyone unite. He stood up and said, “They also rob and kill people. We’re passengers who have paid for our tickets. We want our rights!”

Everyone shouted.

There were more guests on the ship, which meant more people surrounded the sailors.

The sailor immediately panicked and looked at Zhang Haiyan, “Brother Yan, you’re in the wrong because you cheated.”

“I didn’t cheat.” Zhang Haiyan said with a smile, “The three of them are the ones who used turmeric. My hands just happened to touch it. Cousin, if you don’t believe me, you can sniff them and see who has the strongest smell of turmeric on them. Is it me, or them? They’re professional scammers who have scammed enough money in Malacca. Now they’re ready to go to San Francisco and cheat more people. They’re clever and have sufficient capital. If you keep them on board, you’ll all be unlucky.”

While he was speaking, He Jianxi had found that something was off. Since the two fractions had separated, he clearly smelled the strong scent of turmeric on his side.

He moved his nose and was just about to say something when the passenger punched He Jianxi’s nose and knocked him to the ground. “How can you believe his nonsense? Don’t be polite to them. From now on, we’re the bosses of this boat. There are more of us! Look, who has most of our money? Do we look like liars?”

Everyone looked at Zhang Haiyan. To be honest, he was the one who looked the most like a liar.

One of the passengers who was there to watch the show said, “This person has a compartment to live in, while we all have to sleep on a wide bed together. He’s young and rich enough to live in a compartment. He must have swindled the money.” Everyone started clamoring all at once.

The leader of the passengers sneered, looked at Zhang Haiyan, and then shouted, “That’s right. It’s all dirty money. You must still have a lot of money with you!”

Brother Long saw that the situation wasn’t good, and immediately pushed Zhang Haiyan out. “Don’t act rashly. Solve your own grievances by yourselves. Don’t disturb the boatswain. Otherwise, no one will get to San Francisco.”

“Brother Long, you have no loyalty.” Zhang Haiyan took a big puff of his cigarette and looked at the crowd. He was surrounded by a lot of people, but they all stayed on the sidelines, unwilling to attack first. They were professional scammers, after all. They weren’t good at inciting others, so they didn’t know how to end it.

There was a stalemate for a while, before the woman from earlier suddenly said, “You wicked person, let the plague god of the sea take care of you.”

It was as if the leading passenger had a sudden epiphany, and he immediately agreed. “Yes. We’ll take the money back and throw him into the sea. The plague god of the sea will take him. There are blades in the plague god’s mouth. Let him cut off your lying, stinky mouth!”

What a weak bastard! I deal with these kinds of people all day long, so of course I’ll get rusty. Zhang Haiyan thought to himself.

When the leading passenger saw that no one was willing to make a move, he winked at the other two mahjong players. The three people pulled out daggers and moved to surround Zhang Haiyan on all three sides.

The first one rushed behind Zhang Haiyan, who dodged slightly and smashed the man’s nose in with his elbow. As the person went flying, Zhang Haiyan swiftly moved to face the second one, patted his head directly, and knocked him to the ground.

He moved so fast that no one could see him clearly. By the time the leading passenger showed up in front of him, Zhang Haiyan had already squeezed his neck, lifted him up, and kissed him.

Everyone was extremely shocked. The passenger was kissed to the point that his hands were flailing, but he couldn’t break free.

When Zhang Haiyan finally let go of him, the person dropped to the ground, covered his throat, and started to heaving.

The woman rushed towards him, “You bastard! You’ve harassed my man!”

The leading passenger pushed the woman away, grabbed his neck, and started vomiting. He spat out copious amounts of blood, along with two or three blades. When the blades fell onto the deck, all those gathered took a step back.

“Didn’t you want to see the plague god?” Zhang Haiyan turned his back to the setting sun, put his hands in his pockets, and opened his mouth. The blades in his mouth reflected the light. “It's been a long time, everyone.”

Alas, Zhang Haixia is not by my side. I’m being a bit reckless, but it feels so good. Being reckless truly makes people happy, after all. Zhang Haiyan thought to himself.

As He Jianxi dropped to the ground, his last thought was: the hero he admired, the plague god of the sea, the hero who protected the Chinese on this sea route, was an intersex person.

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TN Notes:

(1) Can also be called androgynous, hermaphrodite, or a whole slew of other politically and not politically correct terms. Here’s more info

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Merebear note: I have absolutely no idea if this follows the book, but chapter 1 of the untranslated manhua for the Southern Archives is here. It's got some of the stuff from this chapter if you just want a pretty picture to look at lol

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