Dark Lord Dumbledore

"Sirius."

"Mother."

Watching Sirius and the painting of his dead mother engage in an emotionally constipated greeting, was more than slightly amusing for Harry.

"I will fill Mr Black in on the situation first, and then you guys can have a talk later." He said, prolonging the inevitable disaster of a reunion.

"Just call me Sirius, Harry. No need to be so formal."

Mrs Black was about to say something cutting before noticing Harry's stare and swallowing the insult.

"Of course, Sirius. Come on, you must be curious about what is going on." Harry said, leading Sirius away from all that was left of his mother.

The next hour was spent describing the contrived story he had come up with so Sirius would no be totally in the dark about Harry's feud with Dumbledore. This, of course, did not involve any mention of world domination or his global muggle empire funded by house-elf ninjas.

The story began after Walburga died and became a magical portrait. Kreacher had finally built up the courage to tell her about the facts surrounding Regulus' death and Voldemort's identity and plans.

This revelation drove Mrs Black to order Kreacher to investigate anything and everything about Tom Riddles life and eventual defeat at the hands of her son's godson. Since Sirius was locked up and unable to perform his duties, Mrs Black thought this was a good enough excuse to influence the last heir of a Noble House.

Finding many inconsistencies, Kreacher eventually tracked six-year-old Harry Potter down to where he was being enslaved by filthy muggles. Reporting the situation back to the portrait of his dead master, it was agreed that they would make contact and persuade Harry to their cause.

After explaining the situation to Harry, he agreed to change places with Dudley instead of just killing them like Kreacher initially wanted to do. This was mainly because when Mrs Black was informed about the spells on Harry and the spy across the road, she knew they had to be low-key in their movements less they exposed themselves to Dumbledore.

A child, a painting and a house-elf were not exactly equipped directly confront such a powerful wizard. Even if they could hide the child, Dumbledore could till politically brand them as the villains when Harry returned to the wizarding world.

Of course, with Harry being only six and having no knowledge of the magical world, he was soon making regular trips to Grimmauld Place to be tutored by Mrs Black.

By the time Harry was done filling in all the blanks and covering up any inconsistencies in his 'raised by Walburga' narrative, Sirius was in tears and on board with hating Dumbledore.

Since he already blamed the old bastard for his false imprisonment, the torture of his godson galvanised Sirius into following along with Harry's plans almost without question.

"First on your list to do Sirius is to get your Occlumency up to scratch. If Dumbledore reads your mind and finds out we know about him, we will have failed before we can even expose him. Just look at what happened to poor Hagrid, thrown under the bus as soon as he lost his value to Dumbledore!" Harry explained.

Though he said that, it didn't really matter if their plan to take down Dumbledore was found out, just that the fun will be over too quickly. Harry would just have to enact his backup strategy of killing the old man off with a swarm of ninja elves.

Hell, just killing the Dumbledore and having Skeeter print scathing articles about him would satisfy R.O.B's conditions in reincarnating him here. But that would take any fun out of his new life.

While he slowly enslaved the rest of the magical world to stop the inevitable war with muggles, he would play politics with magical Britain and live out his childhood dream of correcting JK Rowling's portrayal of Harry Potter. As much as he liked the first few books, the ending was terrible.

Sirius, for his part, could only marvel at how Harry was acting. Strong, confident, and pretty much demonstrating all the pure-blood qualities his parents had tried to force him to adopt. The boy did not behave how a first-year Hogwarts student should, he was too m.a.t.u.r.e. In his mind, this just proved he was raised by his dead mum's soul imprint on a painting.

"Don't worry Harry, I won't fail you again. We will show the world that Dumbledore is an evil old goat f*cker and get revenge for all the injustices he caused us." Sirius emotionally proclaimed.

"I don't think you failed me, Sirius, you were as much of a victim as I was. Even my parents were just pawns in Dumbledore's game of chess, ready to be sacrificed to further his legend. From what I have researched, it looks like he killed off his own sister to free him from any burdens restricting his path to glory. The man is simply a monster!"

After getting a hold on his emotions, Sirius remembered the part about learning Occlumency and was amazed that a first-year was already perficient enough in it to fend off Legilimency probes. Harry must have if he survived four months in the proximity of Dumbledore!

Sirius would have to step up his game, being shown up by his eleven-year-old godson was rather shameful, even if he had been in prison for ten years. Maybe he could teach Harry how to become an animagus to regain some respect...

Sirius was then badgered by Harry into quickly restoring his health and taking up the mantle of Lord Black. The Potter regency would also need to be filled by him until Harry came of age. Just like his Occlumency, Sirius would also need to focus on his customs and etiquette if he was going to handle the rebuilding of two prominent Houses.

There was also the need to follow up on the Auror investigation into the Potters inheritance, property and owed rent, not to mention the business of Hagrid's attempted Line Theft.

"But I thought he was innocent?" Sirius asked, unsure why Harry wanted to prosecute the half-giant.

"It's quite simple, Sirius. The pure-bloods need to make an example of anyone even daring to think of usurping their legacy. You have seen how they feel about muggle-borns supposedly stealing their magic, and that is just conjecture.

But this is an actual attack on their influence and power base, just like how you were locked away without trial, and they will demand heads to roll for it!

I wouldn't be surprised if Millicent Bagnold and Barty Crouch Snr are fined into paupers before being sent to Azkaban for a few years. Hagrid, on the other hand, will be executed for sure, seeing as they have already taken his wand and the rights that come with it in his youth.

I want you to push for having Hagrid become an indentured servant for his 'crimes' and serve our Houses. This way, we can stick it to Dumbledore and gain a loyal warrior and friend." Harry explained.

"Still, that's a little extreme, isn't it, can't we just clear his name? This will have everyone thinking he is a criminal!" Sirius argued.

"Magical Britain will want blood for this. Some for hurting the Boy-That-Lived, some for racist beliefs, and everyone else as a deterrent for Line Theft. Then you have Dumbledore in the mix that will either reclaim his pawn or kill him off to hide any evidence linking him to it.

Either way, Hagrid's life is over. At least this way we can help him live a prosperous life and probably get him his wand back. I mean, have you ever seen where he lives? It's so tiny that it doesn't even have a bathroom!"

It took a bit longer to convince the new Potter regent of the value in his plans, but he eventually caved and decided to go along with it. This also included Harry's need for an extended absence to take care of 'personal matters'.

Sirius outright objected of course, but it was easy enough to play the 'I have been looking after myself since I could walk' card, and the fact that it had been thanks to Harry that Sirius was free, not the other way around. This had confused Sirius as he was under the impression that it was Rita that had uncovered his innocence.

"Sirius, from all I have told you tonight, how could you think that Ms Skeeter found a poor, innocent, wide-eyed, naive bumpkin in Diagon Alley on her lunch break. One that just happened to bump into her and tell the reporter his terrible life story." The boy impatiently informed Sirius.

"I, uh, um..."

"Exactly. I then pointed Rita in the direction of my parent's will and the fact I had no godparents or guardians that were magical. Although she certainly was the driving factor behind your release, it was me directing her to do so!

Now I know that you are only trying to look out for me and have my best interests in mind, but I have been dodging Dumbledore and his schemes since I first met Kreacher at age six. If you need to find me for an emergency or send a letter, you only have to ask one of the elves to deliver the message.

Don't worry Sirius, I'm not running away because I hate you or anything. I just have some private things I need to do that have been planned since before Hogwarts started. You should take this time to sort everything out, so when I get back, we can do something fun." Chad concluded.

After a few more weak objections, Sirius once again conceded. Ten years of reliving all of your failures and insecurities in prison did a number on you after all. Harry liked Sirius Black's character in the books, even if he was heavily manipulated.

It would be fun to live with the fun 'dogfather' he had only read about, especially now he would not be browbeaten by Mrs Weasley into a shell of the man he was in his youth. Jut one more benefit from not following canon like the many fanfics Chad had read in his first life.

With the problematic topics out of the way, they continued to talk about lighter subjects like interests and hobbies. Harry didn't want to be all doom and gloom around his godfather after all.

Sirius was the definition of a man-child, but he truly cared about Harry's well-being, something that he had only experienced with Crystal and his elves until now.

Speaking of house-elves, with Dumbledore being ousted from his Headmaster's position, their bond will be broken until the next Headmaster is chosen. Chad couldn't see Dumbledore coming back to be paraded in front of his detractors like Lucius Malfoy in a symbolic removal of power and position.

Removing Dumbledore from Hogwarts was something Lucius had been to do since he bribed his way onto the school board, there was no way he would miss an opportunity to gloat! Though it may cause problems for Chad to get his hands on Riddle's Diary.

He would have his elves that were already established at Hogwarts try and tempt them into his employ. But even if they do end up bonding to Chad, he would keep them at school anyway.

What better place to have loyal teleporting minions, than in an easily defendable castle where all of his opponent's children lived for most of the year?