Dark Lord Dumbledore

Before Chad left Australia, there was still one thing he needed to do. He had with great restraint put off testing one of the most famous artifacts in the Potterverse for the sake of safety, but now he had plenty of test subjects.

Ravenclaw's Diadem was said to enhance the wisdom of its wearer and was attributed to Rowena Ravenclaw's success, so much so that her own daughter stole it out of jealousy.

Since Chad was not stupid enough to place a magical artifact with unknown abilities and side-effects on his head, he had spent quite a bit of time theorising what its properties actually were.

His first idea was it held all of Ravenclaw's magical knowledge like a downloadable repository, but that had quickly been discarded since her daughter wouldn't have needed to steal it so much as just wear it once or twice.

Next was the possibility to have its wearer make smarter and more wise decisions while it sat atop their heads, but again Chad thought this wasn't the case since Voldemort had decided to split his soul seven times. This was not an example of enhanced wisdom, especially since he did nothing to counter the side effects.

Many possible ideas had flashed through Chad's mind of what the Diadem was capable off, but then a single piece of deduction had poured cold water over his enthusiasm to find out just what it was. Dumbledore surely had to have known where Voldemort's Horcruxes were, but he had not taken them for himself.

Voldemort may have had the charm and skill to find it in the first place, but Dumbledore had manoeuvred the man to leave it at Hogwarts, his power base. It was either that, or the Diadem clearly didn't grant its wearer wisdom since Voldemort thought he was clever by practically handing it over to his most hated foe.

Chad refused to believe Dumbledore was so incompetent that he failed to know there was a Horcrux under his nose when he was in charge of the ward scheme and had an army of house-elves and magical portraits to spy on people. Why would he let Voldemort roam Hogwarts unsupervised?

To be on the safe side, Chad had been operating under the notion that Dumbledore was aware of everything Voldemort was since only an idiot would create a weapon and not keep track of it. Though arrogance may also explain why both Dumbledore and Voldemort did so many retarded things, so anything was possible.

Either way, Chad was now free to field test the legendary item that all Ravenclaws dreamed of owning. As he looked at the muggle struggling in his restraints, he couldn't help but feel his excitement for figuring out the Diadem's attributes return.

Placing it on the test subject's head, Chad proceeded to ask a series of questions and slowly increase the speed he did so. While he did this, he monitored the health of the muggle to find any dangerous side effects.

Repeating the process nine times on different muggles, he replicated the process on ten of his enslaved wizards. After a few hours of 'SCIENCE!' he had worked out just how Rowena had made her name as the smartest witch in history.

The Diadem did not increase its wearer's wisdom or knowledge, it increased the thinking speed. The muggles had not been able to answer questions they didn't know but had fired off answers quickly to those they did.

Though the muggles had been worn out by prolonged usage, becoming mentally tired. The wizards, however, had been fine, their magic somehow bridging the gap of extended use with no repercussions.

At first, Chad had been underwhelmed by his conclusions as faster thinking speeds didn't sound very impressive. But the knowledge that he pillaged from expert muggle doctors soon made him aware of the many benefits and how overpowered it could be.

Faster thinking could help in many aspects of life:

-When people are required to think quickly, they report feeling happier, more energetic, more creative, and more self-confident.

-Faster thinking can enhance skills critical to success such as planning, goal setting, problem-solving, and the ability to stay focused on tasks.

-Additionally, research confirms that people who think fast are seen by others as more charismatic and self-assured.

-Quick thinking can make you a more efficient student who blasts through research, exams or problem-solving.

-Faster reaction times can also be attributed to better athletic performance.

Essentially, Rowena Ravenclaw would have learnt, reacted and attacked quicker than anyone not naturally blessed with genius levels of brainpower. Making her a very formidable witch.

If his own uneducated first thoughts on the abilities of the Diadem was any indication of why Voldemort and Dumbledore had discarded it as worthless, it was understandable why it had sat unused for decades.

To powerful, arrogant men like them, wearing women's jewellery for seemingly such little gain would have crushed the myth and legend of the artifact for them. With little research into mental agility in their time, they very well may have dismissed it as the frivolous vanity of a woman.

With its secrets now exposed, Chad had felt comfortable using it for himself. Ravenclaw was a witch generations ahead of her time to create something so simple, yet at the same time extremely complex. If only it didn't make him look so gay...

After hours of examination, Chad was still unaware of how she had even created such an item. Much like the Death Shroud and the Resurrection Stone, there were no runes or clues as to how they functioned, and Chad was loath to alter them in any way out of fear of destroying the enchantments.

Since it was only the appearance that made it undesirable to use, Chad would need to suck up his pride and just use the dainty crown when required. He couldn't be bothered to waste so much time trying to recreate such a marvellous item simply because it didn't suit his fashion sense.

With all of his checklist ticked off for his Australian trip, Chad had one of the Black elves teleport him back to Grimmauld place since Boppy would be staying here to lead his house-elves. There were three days until the Hogwarts Express left and Chad wanted to spend a bit of time with Sirius.

"Harry!" Came the surprised voice of his godfather as Chad suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

"Hey, Sirius, hows things?" He replied nonchalantly.

"Good, now that you are back! Come have a seat, are you hungry?" Sirius asked, mothering him.

It was nice to see just how much the man cared for him, even if it was slightly smothering in nature. If he was a normal child, it would have been acceptable, but Chad had an ad*lt mind and was independent.

Though even he recognised Sirius only had the best of intentions, and this was the main reason he came back early to see him. The poor guy had seen his life destroyed and was then tortured for ten years. Chad may have been selfish, but he could still help people he cared about or liked.

"I could eat. So what's been happening since I have been gone, I'm afraid I wasn't paying much attention to current affairs." Chad asked while Sirius ordered some food from the house-elf left behind to take care of him.

"Nothing too exciting. McGonagall has been made Headmistress of Hogwarts, much to Malfoy's disp.l.e.a.s.u.r.e. The git probably wanted one of his Death Eater buddies to take over so they could recruit directly. Luckily, Lucius had too much to worry about with the Aurors asking why he 'maintained' Potter property without paying you."

"Your joking, Malfoy was behind the stolen businesses? I thought he would have been smarter than that, though it would explain why they are richer than other 'Dark' Houses." Chad replied thoughtfully.

Malfoy fit the bill, but it seemed too obvious and shortsighted. Lucius must have known Harry Potter would eventually ask questions even if canon Harry was dumb as a plank of wood. Chad had always thought Dumbledore was behind it.

"Yes, it seems Malfoy was lucky enough to procure quite a few lucrative properties just as their owners died. The Aurors can't prove anything with them dead, but you will see all of the earnings made over the years plus a hefty fine paid into your vault!" Sirius smugly announced, he had been quite pleased to stick it to someone he despised.

"Ha! Seeing one of the people that got off with the 'I was under the Imperius Curse' finally get some justice, must have brightened your day! Even if it is only taking his money."

With his smug smile still in place, Sirius delivered an exaggerated bow like a pianist after a magnificent performance. "I was merely doing my duty as Regent of House Potter!"

Chad laughed at his tomfoolery, and his dogfather was quick to join in. Dinner soon appeared on the table by elf magic, and they spent the rest of the night talking about everything and nothing.

It was nice to hear about the man-child's exploits in Hogwarts and even his boasts of wooing the fairer s.e.x. If they had a few beers to drink, it would have been a perfect boys night, reminiscent of his previous life when he got together with friends to get drunk and talk sh*t.

Unfortunately, even if Chad had talked Sirius into giving him free rein over his life, he would have still balked at supplying an eleven-year-old with alcohol. Still, it was a pleasant night of bonding and Sirius seemed like a new man, free from the haunted look that had stayed with him since being released from Azkaban.

The next morning when Chad had come down for breakfast, the smiling visage of Sirius had greeted him. And by the mischievous gleam in his eye, the man had something planned.

"Harry, how would you like to become an Animagus?"