Daughter’s Heart

The smell of disinfectant was in the air. There was a burst of pain in the head. There seemed to be the honking of cars and the honking of bicycles outside the window. There are also roadside hawkers chanting.

It’s just that Mo Xueyao’s eyes have been unable to open, as if they were stuck with super glue. Not far away, there seems to be a faint voice of someone exchanging conversations. It’s just like there’s a wall or a door, and he can’t really hear it. He struggled to concentrate, barely listening to some of the conversation.

“Doctor, how is Xiaoyao?”

“Let me tell you, hello, Mr. Yu, we met last time.”

“Yes, hello, Dr. Wang.”

“That’s right, the head injury of this child is not serious. He passed out just because the nerves in his head were compressed, and we checked his state before he passed out and concluded that he had fallen into a coma before he passed out. He had a severe headache, so he accidentally hit the car – it wasn’t the car that hit him.”

“This…then it should be fine.” This was an anxious female voice, which seemed to be the voice of Mo Xueyao’s mother.

“It’s just a scratch, it’s not a big deal, but I’m going to say something more important, his headaches stemmed from the abnormality of the external organs during growth and development, which caused a series of chain reactions. And then… it affects the nerves in the head, like when you have a toothache, you get a headache or even a stomachache.”

“So… that means, does this operation have to be done as soon as possible?”

“That’s right, I personally suggest that it is better to complete it earlier. He is now sixteen years old, and he is at the age to perform this operation. This is also better for his future. After all, he is only sixteen years old. In fact, the character has not been completely determined, and it is not too late to adapt to the girl’s life from now on.”

“Uh, about the money, because this is a special case, we need clinical data.” This seems to be another person’s voice, “So most of the fees can be reduced, and we will try to save you money as much as possible. ”

Then there was a long silence.

A boy-like male voice rang out, it sounded like the voice of godfather Yu Liang: “Are we doing operation in H City or Magic City?”

“The medical conditions in Magic city are definitely better, which is helpful for recovery, but the cost will be higher – after all, the prices there are also higher than those in H City.”

“Huh…” This was her mother’s voice, and she seemed to take a deep breath, “If you want to do it, try to do it as well as you can…but…let’s tell Xiaoyao.”

“I should have asked him what he thought,” said a slightly aged voice, “but continuing to be a boy will not do him any good, and it will be fruitless, because he has no real male internal organs at all. on the contrary, there are women’s uterus and ovaries, no matter from which aspect, it is better to be a girl.”

Mo Xueyao heard through the clouds and fog, but felt extremely flustered and confused. In the end what happened? Why is he suddenly going to be a girl? He tried to open his eyes, feeling a faint tingling pain in his eyelids. But it seems to be just an illusion. Finally, he opened his eyes wide and saw a pale and unfamiliar ceiling.

“Huh…huh…” Mo Xueyao, who only opened his eyes, seemed to have exhausted his strength and was covered in cold sweat, and sat up reluctantly.

“Squeak…” The door was also pushed open at this time.

“Xiaoyao! Are you awake?” As soon as she opened the door and saw Mo Xueyao leaning on the head of the bed, his mother rushed over like a gust of wind.

“Ah…a headache…just now…what did you say at the door?”

Yu Liang took a step forward and was about to speak, but was patted on the shoulder by an old man with white hair mixed with black and wearing black-rimmed glasses.

This old man… It’s not too old, but his hair is a bit short, especially the circle in the center of his head, which is obviously thinner than the sides on both sides.

“Let me tell you, can you avoid it?” The old man said with a smile, in a tone that sounded like he just wanted to share a little secret with the child.

“Okay.” Yu Liang nodded without hesitation, then pulled Yang Xiaoyu, who was still a little hesitant, out of the ward.

The door was closed again. This time, only Mo Xueyao and the old doctor were left in the room.

“Hello, my surname is Wang. You can just call me Dr. Wang. I’ve been involved in both internal and external surgery.” He moved a chair and sat in front of Mo Xueyao.

“My surname is Mo… Mo Xueyao.”

“Well, I know your name, but every time I hear it, it sounds good, haha.” Dr. Wang didn’t seem to be outside, and smiled relaxedly, “Do you know what happened to you?”

“I don’t know…” Mo Xueyao instinctively resisted and shook his head gently.

“How do you feel about being a boy?”

“…I don’t feel anything special.” Mo Xueyao replied, licking his slightly dry lips.

Dr. Wang didn’t answer him, just walked to the water dispenser, filled a cup of warm water in a disposable cup and handed it to him: “Drink some water.”

“Okay…Thank you.” Mo Xueyao took the water cup and took a gulp, half of the water was gone.

“Then you think being a girl…”

Before he could finish speaking, Mo Xueyao shook his head vigorously, his hair that had been neglected for almost two months during the summer vacation swayed slightly.

“Haha! I haven’t finished yet… What do you think it would be like being a girl?”

“I do not want to do.”

“Just think about it.”

“Girls’…” Mo Xueyao could only be forced to imagine, and then felt a chill, “have to wear a skirt or something, and also fall in love with a man…”

“Haha, it’s not the only difference.”

“Doctor Wang, I don’t want to be a girl.” Mo Xueyao looked at him with wide eyes.

“But you were born as a girl. What grade will you be in this September?”

“High school.”

“Oh, then you must remember the knowledge of physiology class.”

“I know.”

“You have a girl’s ovaries and uterus in your body, and the outside is an organ that looks like a male organ, but it has no actual function. They can’t even give you extra male hormones. The decorative effect is greater than the actual effect, don’t you realize that during the period of physical development, other boys have grown taller, have Adam’s apples, and have grown hair, but you don’t?”

“…” Mo Xueyao blushed slightly, but in fact, there was another point, that is, other boys were bigger than him. So that after the boys in junior high school began to develop, he had to hide in the cubicle to go to the toilet, because if he was with everyone, he would easily be laughed at.

“So, you are actually a real girl. The surgery we are going to do is not complicated. It’s just to change the external organs back to girls’ organs, just like a bun with bean paste, but it is made into It looks like dumplings, we have to turn it back into steamed buns now.” Dr. Wang made an interesting analogy.

“Can’t you go back without changing?”

“Well… let’s not talk about the social problems that will arise in life in the future, just recently, if you don’t do it, you will often have stomach pains or headaches, or even pain all over your body, and this abnormal physiological state will affect your brain, in short, it creates all kinds of trouble.”

Mo Xueyao rubbed his head, which was still aching, but did not answer. Just bowed his head in silence.

“In life, there are always many surprises. We all have to face them and solve them, don’t we?”

“If you keep rejecting it, it will make your parents very worried.”

“Actually, being a girl is also very good. Most people don’t have the experience of being a boy first and then a girl like you.”

Mo Xueyao let Doctor Wang speak, but remained silent. He grabbed the sheets under him, only to feel that it happened all too suddenly.

“Does it feel too sudden?”

“yes……”

“Life is like this, there will always be some dramatic things happening, and there are even many true stories that even the screenwriters dare not write.” Dr. Wang patted Mo Xueyao on the shoulder to comfort him. “If you feel that you have to fall in love with boys after being a girl and resist because of it, then you don’t have to, because girls don’t necessarily have to like boys.”

At this moment, the collection of various external factors finally broke through Mo Xueyao’s psychological defence line.

“me……”

“yes?”

“Let me…let me think about it…this…will this operation cost a lot of money?” Mo Xueyao rubbed his hair a little irritably, messing it up like a chicken coop.

“We will try our best to save money for your family, but it is estimated that it will be around 50,000 yuan.”

“A lot.” Mo Xueyao blurted out.

“But your body is more important.”

“Our family can’t afford that much money…”

“If you are really in difficulty, our hospital can help you apply for a bank loan – with the hospital’s relationship, the loan will be easier.”

Mo Xueyao rubbed his hair again, and lay back on the hospital bed as if he was out of breath.

He looked up at the unfamiliar ceiling again, then sighed and muttered, “It feels like an absurd dream…”

“It’s not a dream, it’s a reality.” Dr. Wang patted Mo Xueyao on the shoulder, “Think rationally, will this stalemate save the family money, or will the operation directly save the family money? What if you have such an accident again? In the end, you become someone who needs the personal care of others for the rest of your life, what should you do?”

When Mo Xueyao was told this, the image of lying in bed and unable to take care of himself suddenly appeared in his mind. His heart trembled, and he seemed to be beginning to shake. Not because I am willing to be a girl, but because I am worried that my stubbornness will make the family situation more difficult and bring more trouble.

Think rationally…

He slowly closed his eyes, feeling extremely annoyed in his heart.

“Then, let’s talk about it, I believe you will make the best choice.” Dr. Wang smiled, stood up, pushed open the door and walked out of the ward. After that, no one came in.

This blank and quiet time seemed to be reserved for him on purpose…