Dream Star

He wanted to show her this time, that he's serious. To do that, he has to take her; it's the only way. Haruka looked at her, really looked. She's pretty; he's never honestly paid attention to her appearance now. He is looking at her like this, looking at her so cornered. So vulnerable lead to something shattering in the back of his mind. Whenever he got remotely close to her whenever he even so much brushed past her, these sorts of feelings would emerge.

What do you call this again?

Ah yes, l.u.s.t and d.e.s.i.r.e. At the end of the day, he's still a hanyou. Nothings changed at all. But none of that mattered now. His head felt fuzzy; it was pounding loudly. Did he drink something strange? Most likely, he went to see the boss and then those other girls. If they drugged him Haruka didn't notice, he never does.

"Ha—Haruka, um wait…" Lila protested.

He doesn't and slowly removed the girl's shirt. Lila still struggled. "Haruka, please you know we can't."

Haruka sighed in annoyance, "And why can't we? Every day, we already do such intimate things."

"But I. ."

He immediately shuts her up, "You're already mine. You belong to me." Haruka murmured.

Lila looked dejected at his words, a flash of disappointment in her eyes, "Haruka, but you said…"

"I can't wait anymore. Do you know how painful it is for me? Not being able to touch you?"

Seeing the girl shiver, he paused. He doesn't want to scare her into this. But at the same time, he feels like he's going crazy. He is going crazy. He's wanted her for such a long time.

He has had plenty of opportunities. He practically touches Lila every day, so why is it. Why is it that his self-control didn't break until now? He doesn't understand his thoughts anymore.

Before he could proceed, however, the girl's fist landed on his face. Since he spaced out he didn't that Lila had already broken free of his grip, she looked at him angrily.

"You can't do this Haruka. Please think straight."

Think straight?

Haruka understood when he saw her quivering figure, despite her fear she tried to remain strong. Think straight? Isn't his thoughts rational? He caught a glimpse of the packet on the ground and ran his hand through his hair, "...Take a bath Lila; I'll order us some food."

She seemed surprised, but Haruka continued, "Remove the filth." He was talking about him touching her even a little.

What is he doing?

....

When Lila finally exited the bathroom, the takeaway had just arrived, so the food was still fresh. Judging how her hands were in such a bad state, Haruka ordered sushi to make it easier for her. But even eating them with her hands proved to be difficult, so he found himself feeding her.

"Is it good?" he asked.

"En, it's yummy," Lila chirped.

How is she still able to smile brightly after what he did to her? Now that he's calmed down, he's starting to regret it slightly. He should have continued to wait.

Haruka knew what he did is wrong. Influence of drugs or not, he shouldn't have touched her. He already regrets it a lot; this incidence will leave a mental scar in her heart. She stopped him before anything happened but pinning her to the ground like that was uncalled for.

His thoughts broke off when Lila picked up one of the sushi and brought it to his lips, "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Um, feeding you," she replied.

"Your hands." Haruka reminded her.

"It's just one."

Haruka grabbed hold of her wrist and bent down to eat; in the process, he licked and s.u.c.k.e.d her fingertips to get rid of any remains of the food. It was clear that Lila struggled to hold back her voice, for the two, simple contact like this is no longer possible.

Once he finished, he noticed Lila looked down, "T-tell me Haruka.."

"What?"

"Why do you like me…"

Why? He has his reasons, but if he says it, then it means exposing that he knows her identity. She must have understood since she wrapped her arms around his neck, "I'm not a good person, I'm lying to you about many things and my heart belongs to another."

"I know."

He knows, there's hidden darkness about her that he hasn't seen before. But even then, "I don't think that side of you is bad."

Her expression was grim as he said those words, gaze filled with sadness, as she spoke carefully, "I will continue hurting you Haruka, are you okay with that?"

"...I am."

"Haruka.

"I know what you're trying to do. But it won't work."

It won't work, he's already fallen for her so badly. He realized his feelings for her even more during the time he was apart from her. Every second, every minute and hour during the day. All he could do was think about her; that's why he went to see her even though it was only for that brief time. However, after that time, Haruka understood that he should patiently wait for her here. Once she was no longer by Austin Kiryu's side, he would get his chance.

Haruka felt her hands trace his c.h.e.s.t, and he lets out a content sigh. "Do you, really not like me?" Haruka asked. He already knew her answer, but there is nothing wrong with trying.

"Honestly, I don't know.."

"You don't know?"

Lila nodded, "I don't know. I don't understand. Since coming here, I've had a hard time understanding things about myself. Have I always been this way? Or has something changed? If something's changed...is it how I feel towards you? My feelings.."

He knows what she's trying to get at. The feelings she has for him aren't the same as they were before. He's genuinely surprised about this. He didn't think she would cave in so soon. But then again, there was already such signs of it before. He raised his hand to her face, tracing her eyelids, eyes, nose, cheek before brushing his fingers against her soft lips. "Your feelings, where do they lay?"

It was a tricky question.

And he's taking quite a risk with it.

However, he noticed something different flash across Lila's eyes when he asked. For him that something is enough. It's the most progress he's had with her in a long time.

It's working like the boss said. 'all you have to do is spend more time with her, and treat her like she's your only one.' Damn, why does that old guy have such knowledge? Haruka leaned forward and kissed the girl gently. Eyes locked on hers after he's finished, "The fact that I like you, you know right?"

Lila nodded, "I know already."

"Then, you need to think it through more."

It's strange he is telling her this.

His thoughts break off when she leaned forward. He blinks..eh? What? Did she suddenly get horn--Haruka sees her eyes flash red.

If that were all, then he wouldn't have to worry. Haruka noticed that the girl's blue hair had turned purple. Is she that thirsty? Haruka asked, "Do you want some?"

Lila didn't answer his question and focused on the trail of blood on his c.h.e.s.t, flowing from the mark she just made, "Haruka, it's sweet…"

"..Is that so?"

"I'm so hungry…."

"Take some."

Lila seemed reluctant, but eventually, he found himself on his back and the girl hovering over him. "I don't want to.. keep hurting you…" eyes filled with pain. He really did hurt her, and yet Lila didn't run from him.

He brings her forward.

"I don't mind being hurt." he murmured.

And the words are lost after that.

Right now, the two of them are still searching for ways to connect their feelings.