Hiatus Gifting This Unfortunate Guy With Blessings

Hey guys, you might have wondered why I haven't posted a chapter yesterday.

I wasn't slacking off. I was sitting with my hand above the keyboard for the majority of the day.

But my hand didn't move much.

This was not a phenomenon called a 'writer's block'.

It was more of a 'realization'.

I f.u.c.k.e.d up. Plain and simple. In so many places that I can't even begin to think about how to fix this mess.

Let's start with the basic thing. Protagonist. Or no. With an idea about the world. Konosuba is a comedic world with very little worldbuilding. I thought it would be awesome, even if I couldn't replicate such a wonderful comedy I could at least add more things that would make this world a little bit 'logical'. And what did I do in the first 500 words?

I introduced a character with a trait that didn't make a goddamn sense. Kazuki's scars. I mean, it would be all fine and dandy if this was a comedic series. It was a character trait like Maika's (from BlendS anime) sadistic gaze that scared everyone even though she was a cute anime girl. But do you see the problem with that? Yeah, it contradicts my idea about a more 'logical' world. It simply didn't make sense but my brain desperately clung to the thought it was somewhat logical.

Ok, let's leave those poor scars for a moment and talk about Motivation. It's something that defines the character. Since all of you are novel readers you don't need me explaining that motivation is pretty F.U.C.K.I.N.G important. Like Eren's d.e.s.i.r.e to kill Titans or Luffy's dream to be Pirate King or Naruto's to be a Hokage. My character got none... and what irks me the most is the fact that I could've easily given him a good motivation.

The Wish! You may not remember this thing, because it is mentioned only once in Konosuba novel and anime. One time in my fanfic as well. But it's pretty damn important. Or... it could be. For helping the world to get rid of Demon King you can get anything you want. ANYTHING. Erasing Kazuki's scars would probably be easier than ANYTHING, right? My dumbass brain never got that idea until just recently. That sounds like pretty good motivation. And after achieving the goal he could just find another one.

But as of chapter 54, he's got 0 motivation. And it would be impossible for me to add that motivation in any way that wouldn't make me cringe as a reader.

I won't start on how Kazuki doesn't have a defined character because there are too many situations that show this perfectly. He's like a walking contradiction at times. Sometimes calm, then rash. Sometimes calculating, then downright dumb. Sometimes confident, then nervous. Sometimes cunning, then dense. No one is perfect but Kazuki, after re-reading my novel from scratch, feels like a character that was written to suit the scene. And it should be a character that acts according to the scene. That is really important.

It might seem weird coming from the author but even I didn't realize how much I've f.u.c.k.e.d up until I sat down and re-read it from scratch while trying to think logically.

Ok... besides Kazuki being... a badly written character there's also Chris. I mean... Contrary to Kazuki I think she is portrayed somewhat well. At least I hope so. Besides one major problem. I can't... for the life of me ... understand why did I think that she would move in with Kazuki without batting an eye. I just can't fathom what was I thinking at that time. Since then I had lost the grasp on Chris's character. Because of the fact that they lived together, every time I was getting trying to write a scene with that house in the picture I had massive hold-backs. I didn't understand why writing about story in that place always gave me so many problems. It was because it didn't make ANY SENSE...

There's also [Imitate]. I still think it is an extremely interesting power. But it's not something I can possibly give justice to. I realized that somewhere around the 20th chapter. But I didn't want to be like my friend that constantly stops writing his novels at the drop of the hat. I thought that as my writing skills increase I will be able to pull it off. To this day I think it is too overwhelming power for me to write about.

I think I did well with Megumin, Aqua, and Wiz. Megumin being #1 girl in the series in my opinion probably was easy to spot.

Kazuma and Darkness on the other hand... I only realized how little I know of them when I started imagining their interactions with other people besides the original cast, with a different set of experiences. I don't understand them... and leaving them was impossible due to how I structured character interactions.

I just couldn't find a way to remove any of those problems at this point... and with them, it's simply impossible for me to continue.

Sorry guys that I've wasted your time but I hope that you had at least a semblance of fun until this point.

Thank you for all kind of reviews, thoughts, comments, and your votes with power stones.

I wish you all better luck in finding novels to read.