Pasifista

Holed up in my room at Asagi-sou (Heron Manor), I crouched on my bed with the futon over my body.

In the secluded darkness, I couldn’t escape it even when I closed my eyes.

I couldn’t escape the mire of nightmares.

Straddling the futon I used to cover myself with, it laughed kekeke.

Even with my eyes closed, I could see it, perceive it, understand it.

I had never believed that it really existed up until now.

It was something I once heard in a bedtime story from my grandpa, who used to work as an exorcist.

The story of a monster of the everlasting realm that emerged to this present realm.

I was possessed by an『Oni』.

When Sensei brought up the matter of recommendation, both my parent and I were in joy without any semblance of doubt.

I was not particularly fond of sports, but I was a high specs all-around athlete, if I do say so myself.

I never lost a single race in school, and I received zealous invitations from various athletic clubs, especially from the track and field club.

Even so, the reason I deliberately decided to join the cultural club was because I didn’t want to do something physically exhausting even at school.

We didn’t particularly take disciples, but there was a kenjutsu dojo back in my home that had been passed down from generation to generation, and nowadays we were conducting training as a kind of family-only exercise.

I heard that when my grandfather was still active, there were some disciples, though.

I was confident in sports, but my grades were on the level it was faster to count them from the bottom, so when the matter of going to higher education began to be brought up, it was also the moment that I finally regretted that perhaps I could have gotten some sports recommendations if I had joined some sports club.

When I was told about the recommendation to this academy, I jumped on it without hesitation.

I’d like to strangle the me who happily thought that it was like a video game, or that she could use all the sword fighting skills she’d learned to her heart’s content, even after she was told about the dungeon and monsters.

It was when I returned from the first dungeon training that I started being possessed by it.

It was a hairy, raven-like creature.

Not only was it invisible to everyone but me, no one could notice or touch it.

On top of the futon, it laughed gehihi vilely.

Even as I knew that it was useless, I flung off the futon and reached out my hands toward it to grab it by the neck.

With a swish, it slipped through my hands like a 3D hologram.

And yet, it could get on top of me, and it hurt when its nails pierced me.

This was unfair.

Even though I couldn’t touch it, it was heavy and it hurt.

「No, don’t….」

I had been cooped up in my room all this time that my voice sounded scratchy and thin, like I was crying.

My roommate was so creeped out by my odd behavior that she stopped returning to the room.

I guess that was inevitable, since from others’ point of view, I was performing a nonsensical one-man wrestling match, after all.

The monster, whose body was about the size of a baby, had protrusion rising from the midst of its black body hair and feathers.

It was a huge, unsightly meat stick that was wholly disproportionate to its tiny build.

I had no experience in sexual intercourse with any man before, but I understood that it was a male organ.

I was made to understand.

On top of me, who was wearing a sweatshirt as pajamas, it lightly moved and casually pushed its member between my thighs that were shut stiff.

From beyond the sweatshirt and through even the underwear, all I could feel was the sticky sensation of its manhood rubbing against my skin.

I squeezed the pillow and curled up my body, but it passed through and secured a position between my legs, which were clamped together, before then vigorously pushing its male organ in.

My crotch chasm, which I covered with both hands, was pushed open in the shape of its manhood.

As I felt the hollow sensation of the rapidly drilled open hole through my palm, inside that place, I could clearly feel the stiff manhood scraping and making its way inside.

As it pounded and ravished that place as it pleased, I shed tears at this overly unreasonable phenomenon.

Having been whimsically and incessantly ravished by it, which always haunted me, pain had vanished from that place.

It was like me bleeding and almost fainting from the pain during the first time was no more than a lie.

As proof that this was not some crazy fantasy of mine, a large amount of semen, to the point of it oozing out of my underwear, was left behind after each act.

My body, which had been used incessantly in my sleep for about a week, ended up being made to feel pleasure, as if to show what kind of creature what was known as female was.

As I felt that I couldn’t care less about anything and everything else anymore, I began to use my body on my own accords amidst the trance and fuzzy consciousness.

With its manhood inserted like that of a joystick that controlled a robot that was me, things progressed as if I were watching myself being made to eat, head to school and so on from afar.

The sight of me attending class with it attached to my rear was very comical, shaving off my sense of reality.

The only time『I』 returned to my body was when I was moved to the bathroom or other secluded places to enjoy the pleasure of being violating by it.

Perhaps it’d be troubling if I were to die or get isolated as having gone crazy at this rate.

On behalf, substitute, replacement.

That was why I tried to destroy the『me』 inside me since it was in the way.

I invited the boys in my class to do a dungeon dive with me.

It was a reverse harem party with all boys but me.

As soon as we dived in, I was gang raped by all of them as a matter of course.

I pushed it all to『me』, who instigated it.

I was made to know that boys’ male genitalia came in various shapes and sizes.

Of course, we all returned from the dead due to being killed by goblins.

However, somehow I retained my memory and didn’t forget about all that happened.

Be it the sensation of being killed, the sensation of being gang raped, all of it, all of it, all of it.

Every day after that, I invited every boy in my class, before then being gang raped and killed in the dungeon.

I was made to memorize the cocks of all the boys in my class.

I memorized none of the boys, though.

However, the wild delusions in my mind of what happened in the dungeon, I was certain that all of it was true.

It also became less and less reserved and began to pound me even during class.

I could keep my voice down, but as I had been trained to inevitably feel pleasure from it, for sure I was releasing a lot of pheromones.

The girls in my class scorned me as a public toilet, while the boys kept inviting me with the resolve to return alive from the dungeon with our memory intact that day.

There seemed to be no boys who had the guts to rape me outside the dungeon as of yet, but I bet it was only a matter of time.

The boy party of my class was arguing about the invitation to today’s dungeon dive.

I was standing absentmindedly in front of the food counter at the student cafeteria, thinking that they were surely bothering the surroundings.

It was unusually detaching itself from my body, scampering about and fanning the arguing boys.

It liked to play malicious pranks such as stepping on their feet or poking their shins.

The embodiment of petty malice that no one could see, no one could notice.

With a squeak, I was surprised to see it got stepped on like a stuffed toy.

I was so surprised that it could be said that my emotion was stirred again after a long time.

Squashed in the shape of footprints, it promptly reverted back to normal, but it seemed to be very angry.

It moved its short legs and scampered after the person who stepped on it, I was also tempted to follow after it, while the boy party from my class followed after me.

They were sitting at a table by the terrace, overlooking the courtyard.

Including the one who stepped on it, they seemed like a party of two boys and two girls.

「Do you have business with us?」

「… not really, I have no business with you. But.」

They seemed to be very friendly with each other, and I felt a twinge of dark emotion welling up within me.

Even though I was faced with such a predicament here, how could they be laughing as if they were enjoying themselves there, I thought.

That was why, I wanted to mess them up a little, I thought.

「You guys look like a party that’s proceeding with your dungeon conquest well. You guys seem to be getting along well and all.」

「Well, to a certain extent.」

「Will you let me join your party too?」

「… Before speaking about that. Those people behind you, aren’t they members of your comrades?」

Even though I was the one sending out an invitation toward them, the boys of my class seemed to harbor hostility towards them.

「It doesn’t matter, does it? If you let me join, I don’t mind you doing whatever you want with me, you know?」

「Are you looking down on me? Come back again after you wash your face.」

「Oh, Seiichi, you’re so cool. But, I sense a premonition of trouble….」

I was delighted that they rejected me so readily.

They were surely good people, I thought.

That probably felt even more uncomfortable for it.

Even if it was a wretched feeling of envy, it was without a doubt『my』 feeling, after all.

It nimbly jumped on the table and spoiled the food lined up there.

But it could neither be seen nor be noticed by anyone, or that was how it was supposed to be.

「Ah…!」

The quiet-looking girl moaned as such.

「You wretched thing!」

And then, with a demon-like enraged face, the boy knocked down my little monster, which was neither visible nor noticeable to anyone, for me.

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