I Don’t Want to Be a Lady

“So, you mean~ we have to bring out the remnants of Chewin Kingdom across the canyon?”

“Exactly.”

“Damn it…”

No. What kind of canyon suddenly appeared on this plain, which was so desolate that it seemed that if a wind blew, it would continue to the end of the continent without taking any break? I couldn’t help but laugh out loud.

Ah, could this be the canyon? The peculiar-shaped canyon that is said to be located before entering the canyon area? I looked at Dondon with eyes full of annoyance.

Dondon held out her stomach and raised her head toward me. She gave a look of ‘Why? What? If you don’t want to do it, just leave.’

I clenched my teeth in response to her words that could be heard without being talked. If you don’t like it, just say no. You little dwarf! Given these ridiculous conditions, it was clear that she had no intention of helping us in the first place.

Charter, ignoring the staring fight between Dondon and me, said while observing the canyon through the telescope.

“The entrance to the canyon is quite narrow. We can’t attack that way.”

“Dat right. They know dat and hang in there.”

“Is there another entrance?”

“No.”

“Then, if you leave them alone, won’t they starve to death or crawl out?”

“I have no taime.”

Charter’s black and cold eyes fell on Dondon. Dondon shouted at Charter’s gaze. “Don’t luk down!”

Again, something was out of focus, it wasn’t that he was glaring at her, but she didn’t like the way he looked down at her. He’s a human being who cannot be understood by common sense. Charter turned his gaze to the canyon again.

“How many days have you been watching like this here?”

At my question, Dondon thought about it for a while, then answered.

“For days.”

“How long can they endure?”

“Bout a week from now?”

Then there’s not much left! What on earth are you running out of time for? This little shit! I should just grab and squeeze her tight.

Unfortunately, it was Dondon who held control. I calmed down my anger as much as I could and raised the corners of my mouth. “Then, can’t we just wait a week? Whether they starve to death or surrender, it’ll be over in a week.”

“Then, shouldn’t we just wait a week? “Whether you starve to death or surrender, it’ll be over in a week.”

“I have no taime.”

No time again. I lost even my fake smile at the irritation that ran up from the soles of my feet beneath me. “Why do you have no time when it only takes a week!”

When I asked about it, Dondon said, wrinkling her brow between her small, fluffy hair.

“The emperor said he wuld only give me jas one week! (You damn thing).”

I felt like she swore at me using Kelteman’s language, but that wasn’t the point.

“A week? So, after four days, there are only three days left?”

“No. Considering the taime to return to the emperor’s camp, there’s probably less dhan a day left, right?”

“What? This little… Ugh. That’s impossible!”

Get them out in just one day? Even if this entire army were to stick to the canyon and fight, it would be impossible to subdue them in a single day. But you wanted just Charter and me to do that?

“It’s your job to make it possibwle.”

I was speechless at Dondon’s natural attitude of raising her shoulders.

“…”

Should I kill her? Wouldn’t it be faster just to kill this little shit, take Paku as hostage, and go to the Kelteman’s emperor? I thought about it seriously.

Charter too glared at Dondon with the same gaze as Arianne. He had never felt any emotions towards any woman other than Arianne. Still, when it came to Dondon, he felt something deep inside him. It was profound resentment.

“Why don’t you shoot the canyon with the cannon? Isolation is also a way.”

When Charter, who had much patience, suppressed his resentment and proposed an alternative, Dondon replied.

“There’s no cannun.”

“?”

Arianne and Charter’s heads tilted in one direction. Were there no cannons in Kelteman Empire? No way, I’m sure they used guns and cannons in the last battle.

“How come there’s no cannon?”

When asked by Charter, Dondon scratched her head, avoiding his eyes, probably embarrassed by Charter’s question. The answer came not from Dondon but from Paku, who was standing next to him.

“Ha. Can’t you see this brat’s tent? She’ll move her belongings instead of a cannon.”

She was her younger sibling, but Paku couldn’t bear the shame. Unlike Paku, whose face was flushed, Dondon showed no change in expression as if asking what was wrong with that.

“You’re stupid. You gave up your weapon for luxury.”

“What did yu jas say? Still, what do yu know? Just forget it, okey?”

Dondon asked Arianne as if asking for consent.

“What? Little shit… that’s right. What do men know?”

It was irritating to see the harsh expression on Dondon’s face as if she could smile when she wanted to and get angry when she wanted to. Then why did I keep a fake smile on my face while my eyes didn’t smile at all? It’s because of this little shit. Dondon responded to my forced joke with a satisfied tiger-like expression.

What’s with all this? Even though I hadn’t lived long, I had observed and learned about various types of people under my father, the vicious businessman. However, even for me, who had dealt with many difficult human beings, Dondon was someone I found hard to handle.

I cast a pitiful gaze at Paku. “You must have had a hard time.”

“Yes. Thank you for noticing.” Paku laughed bitterly.

Dondon, who was looking at them with scorn, shouted. “So what yu would do? Didn’t I say I wuld help you if you worked that out!”

I stared still at the canyon. Do we have to pull them out of the canyon? How on earth do we pull them out? As soon as we enter the entrance, we will be arrowed to death by the ambush soldier. Wait a minute! Pull them out? Didn’t she say we only need to pull them out? My brain began to spin wildly. After a while, the corners of my lips went up.

“All we have to do is pull them out of the canyon, right? We don’t have to kill them all?”

Dondon looked up at me and answered my question. “I just ned to take the hed of the royal family anyway. I hate needless sloghter.”

While liking useless luxuries. Anyway, I saw hope in Dondon’s words. So you’re only targeting the royal family?

“Alright. I’ll give it a try. First, let’s say—”

“One. Either one of yu needs to stay with me.”

Do you think we’re going to trick you? That’s why you don’t let both of us go? Even if her words were messy, Dondon’s intelligence wasn’t bad. If she let both of us go, we might run away. That’s why she had to keep one. I also understood Dondon’s position, so I silently accepted it.

“Okay. Then, can you give us time to talk alone?”

“No. Yu could do something nonsense.”

Dondon was firm. I pointed my eyes at her and said, “Because of you, a married couple like us is going to be separated, but you can’t do that much?”

Dondon’s eyes widened as if they would pop out. “Marrid couple? Marrid couple who sleeps under the same blangket?”

That, yes, that couple. Of course, we didn’t necessarily sleep under the same blanket when we got married.

Dondon looked at Charter and I alternated, then murmured. “Wow. How culd such unlucky people get marrid? Dhey said there was a pair of straw sandals. Was it real?”

What on earth does she mean by this? Though I wanted to smack Dondon even just once to relieve my frustration- she was too small to smack- And if I did that, my life would be in immediate danger. So I had to hold back and endure for the sake of my own survival. Let’s see, you little shit.

“Well, if yu hav something to say, say it. I’ll give yu time to say goodbye betwen husban and wife.”

“Yes, thank you…”

I winked at Charter. We started whispering only after we were so far apart that the two siblings couldn’t hear us.

“I will go.”

“No, I’ll go.”

“It’s dangerous. So it’s right for me to go.”

I raised my eyes to Charter. “Now is not the time to decide what is right and what is wrong. We have to choose a more probable route. That’s why I think I should go this time.”

“Why?”

“Because I speak better. And I’m a slender woman, right? Hopefully, they won’t shoot a woman who approaches alone without asking why.”

Charter’s eyes sank. Just like Arianne said, women were more likely to stay alive than men if they jumped in the middle of the enemy camp. However, only the probability of staying alive increased. It was unknown what would happen.

“No, it’s something you can’t do alone in the first place. You’re just doing this for fun.”

“But if I succeed, we can meet the emperor.”

“It’s impossible,” said Charter.

I looked up at Charter and said, “You’re quick to give up.”

“I’m quick to grasp the situation.”

I grabbed Charter by the collar and pulled him.

“Oh. I think they’re going to kiss.” Dondon was watching them with her eyes sparkling in excitement.

Contrary to Dondon’s expectation, I looked at Charter with fierce eyes and growled. “I’m not giving up. There’s a lot of money I haven’t spent yet. I will never die until I scrape your diamond mine to the bottom.”

Charter was taken aback because he could feel she really meant it. Really. Even in this situation… Does she know that she’s not in a position to speak ill of Dondon? It added one more truth about her that he should never tell.

“I will die anyway, so I’ll bet my luck on more possibilities.” I hate gambling, but I have no choice but to rely on luck this time. And if my prediction is correct, they will definitely accept my offer.

I relaxed my grip on Charter’s collar and stroked his cheek. “Don’t worry. Have you forgotten who I am? I’m Baroness Devit. And the daughter of Count Bornes. I’m probably the most famous person on this continent after Count Bornes?”

If it was true that your lifespan increased as you received more insults, then I must be the one with the longest lifespan. Of course, I was the most insulted person in the Harpion Empire right now. Most of the Harpion Empire would curse me for getting the title without knowing the subject. It was I who hoped the virtue (?) I had accumulated over the years and showed my full potential.

“I have an idea. You—”

After a while, a person riding a horse approached the entrance of the canopy. I was letting my silver hair loose so the ambush on the canyon could see me well. They wouldn’t shoot anyone who approached alone and unarmed without checking. Still, I needed to look as harmless as possible, just in case.

(Stop! If you approach any further, I will shoot you!)

As expected, the guard appeared over the canyon and shouted.

“I’m from the Harpion Empire. I’ve come to see the person in charge.”

“Harpion? Don’t approach any further and wait!”

A few minutes later, words of hope came from the guard.

“You are allowed to enter!”

I squinted at the sunlight that just fell over the canyon in time.

“Giddy up!” Kicking the horse, I drove the horse from the side into the canyon.

“She’s entering safely.”

Despite Paku’s words, Charter didn’t lower his hand holding the telescope as if he couldn’t be relieved. Until Arianne disappeared from a view like that, he had a pale face, whether he was breathing properly or not.

Arianne…

Paku was also nervous. So he ran through his innocent hair with an unusually anxious face.

“Who on eart has the most expensive rum?” Only Dondon muttered in a relaxed voice.