I Will Disappear, Grand Duke

Julia looked up at him with languid eyes.

She was still hurt from the fall, but seeing his face she felt relieved.

Julia opened her mouth in a quiet voice.

“Your Highness, why do you not return to the castle?"

Fernan’s eyes narrowed at her words. Julia slumped her shoulders, but continued her words to the end.

"I know it's presumptuous of me, but… I'm worried about you."

Fernan, who looked down at her without answering, eventually gave out a small laugh.

Not only she said she was worried, she also had a painful look in her eyes in this whirlwind.

Fernan, his forehead crumbled clearly, tried to say something more, but he closed his mouth softly.

Then he looked at Julia for a moment, and then coldly turned away.

Returning to the knights’ place, Lloyd, who was quietly watching at his side, held out his hand to Julia.

“Are you all right, Grand Duchess?”

"Oh, thank you."

Julia limped as she barely stood up after Lloyd's help.

What is it that makes him leave a fallen person behind like this? Lloyd clicked his tongue at the cruelty of his master.

Julia, who was hesitating at the sight of Lloyd, asked cautiously.

“Um, How’s His Highness?"

"Oh, that's the thing…”

Lloyd, who pondered for a while, replied in a roundabout way.

"Don't worry, he's in good health. He’s been busy with his duties, so his return has been delayed."

“I see…”

Seeing her sullen, Lloyd somehow felt guilty. He gave an awkward nod, scratching his cheek.

“Now, if you'll excuse me.”

With those words, Lloyd hurried after Fernan.

Once the commotion died down, the town became quiet again.

"Your Grace, are you alright? Let me see.”

Melissa, who had been looking at Julia from afar, finally approached her in a hurry. She hurriedly rolled up Julia's sleeves, revealing her red, swollen wrist.

"Oh, what should I do? You will surely get bruised… Is your ankle okay? Can you walk?"

“I'm sorry. I don't think I can walk by myself.”

With Melissa’s support, Julia suddenly turned around.

All of the items she bought in her excitement a while ago were lying on the floor.

Melissa hurriedly picked up the fallen items. Julia limped over to pick up a bouquet of flowers, but at that moment, people walked past her, stepping on the flowers in vain. 

Staring at the crumpled petals, Julia retreated her outstretched hand.

Then she averted her gaze, unable to hide her sad face.

***

Julia sighed as she looked at the bandages wrapped around her ankle. Not only her ankle, but her wrist was bruised with blue color.

It had been a few days since they went downtown, and these wounds had gotten deeper and deeper.

There was no decent place for both hands and feet, so it was impossible to move.

Julia sat in her chair and looked out the window in a daze. Her mind felt empty.

How long did she sit like that?

Suddenly someone opened the door and hurried inside. It was Melissa.

"Your Grace, His Highness has returned!"

With her eyes wide opened, Julia rose from her seat.

Slightly relieved that Fernan had returned, she stepped out into the hallway, assisted by Melissa.

As she stood on the railing and looked down at the hall, she saw Fernan entering the entrance.

He walked quickly past the hall and climbed the stairs in a single bound. Julia stood at the end of the stairs and greeted him.

"Your Highness.”

Fernan’s gaze rested on her for a moment, then dropped quickly.

He walked past Julia without a second thought. It was as if she was invisible.

Julia bit her lips and limped along.

However, her injured leg could hardly keep up with his stride.

In the meantime, he went into his room.

After a while, Julia finally arrived at his room and hesitantly knocked on the door.

“Your Highness, I have something to say.”

She knocked several times, but after a while, she did not hear any response from inside.

Eventually, Julia let out a small sigh as she slowly backed away.

"Ha…"

The pain came rushing in all at once, probably because she had forced herself to use her ankle.

She leaned against the wall and crouched down, gently patting her ankle.

She didn't have the strength to stand up. Julia sat like that for a while, with her head resting against the wall.

After some time like that, she finally heard the sound of the door opening.

Julia leaned her head back and her eyes met Fernan’s, who was staring at her.

"Um, Your Highness.”

Julia hurriedly stood up. She grabbed Fernan’s hand, afraid that he would leave again.

"…don't go. I'd like to talk to you for a moment."

Fernan’s eyes looking at her were unfathomably deep and dark.

The momentum was a little frightening, but Julia couldn't let go of his hand.

Eventually, Fernan shook off her wrist.

At that moment, the pain that penetrated her wrist made Julia scream involuntarily.

"Ah!" 

Frowning, Fernan reflexively averted his gaze. Then he stared at the bright blue bruise on her wrist.

His eyes flinched subtly for a moment, but they didn't last long.

Immediately he relentlessly turned away again and walked down the hallway.

“Er, wait a minute.”

Julia tried to keep up with him as he moved away, but soon fell down.

A sobbing sound escaped her as she forced herself to walk and her ankle seemed to break.

"Hic…hic….”

She couldn't move any further because of the pain. She was so sad that she had to follow him but things weren't going the way she wanted them to.

Her tears were about to burst out, but Julia put pressure on her brow and tried to hold back her tears.

At that moment, the sound of distant footsteps approached again.

"…you're doing all sorts of things."

She heard a muffled whisper. Lifting her head, Fernan was back before she knew it, standing there biting his lip. 

He bent toward her, who was slumped over. He stiffly picked her up.

 The position of his embrace brought his face closer to hers. Julia looked at him, her eyes moistening.

Fernan began to walk silently without looking at her.

“A, thank you ….."

Muttering softly, Julia looked up at him blankly, wondering.

She thought he left her mercilessly, so she couldn't help but wonder why he came back again.

As usual, his expression was cold without a trace of warmth.

But his touch was warmer than she expected, and the hands that held her were careful. The close gap between them was unfamiliar but pleasing without speed.

“Your Highness, I'm…I'm…"

Julia opened her mouth again as her heart raced and she caught her breath.

"…I have never once thought of harming Your Highness. I'm sure I never will."

"…"

"That aphrodisiac back then…It’s my mistake. Your Highness was right to misunderstand…”

 "You seem to be mistaken."

A voice that sank indifferently interrupted her words.

"I'm not misunderstanding you."

"…"

"If you want to know the reason for my attitude, I’ll tell you."

Fernand looked at her with emotionless eyes.

"…I did not want to have you as my wife from the beginning. That's my reason.”

Fernan's words pierced her heart. Julia, who was staring at him endlessly, eventually dropped her eyes.

His words were painful, and nothing could hurt more.

The pain was worse than when she was beaten and cursed.

Julia said in a trembling voice, her reddened eyes shook.

“Still, I think that His Highness is ……."

"…"

“I liked you from the beginning."

Fernan looked down at her as he stopped walking.

Julia raised her eyes again and made eye contact with him. Her tearful voice continued. 

"I love you and I don't want to be far away. I don't want to get hurt."

A trickle of tears fell from her blue eyes.

Julia raised a trembling hand and brought it to his face. However, the hand that failed to reach him hovered vaguely in the air.

She always wanted to touch him. She wanted to look him in the eye at such a close distance and talk softly to him.

She liked this man from the beginning.

He was the kind man who held out his hand to her like a light in a dark room long ago. The gentle voice that told her not to cry because he would be with her. 

For Julia, this man remained such a warm memory.

From the moment she met him again, she fell in love with him all over again, vainly.

She loved this strong man who seemed to fear nothing. She liked that he seemed to be from a world so different from hers.

And even though he hurt her so much, Julia couldn't hate him very much. Even if it was stupid and pathetic, she couldn't help but fell for him.

Fernan looked down at her for a moment with an unknown expression. Then he quickly shifted his gaze and trudged on.

Fernan walked past the hallway and into her room, where he set her down on the bed and quickly turned away.

A tremendous voice came from him.

“Your heart is of no use to me, not even an inch.”

Again he moved away.

Her heart ached again at the sight of his back, which she had seen enough of.