Looking for My Fiancé's Lover

The bustling streets of the capital, which were full of laughter, applause, music, and dance, were slowly moving away behind us. I slowly relaxed my jaw, obscured underneath my hat and glass bottle, and slightly parted my lips with a relieved sigh. The calm and refreshing air flowed down my throat. Before I knew it, Pancion and I were in the middle of the lake park at the end of the capital.

After a few more steps, he put me down on a park bench. I had been living a shameless life so far, but when I met Pancion’s eyes, my heart raced as if it would explode. It wasn’t anxiety, it was a strange emotion, as if the tremble was from bashfulness.

“Th-th-thank yo-…”

When my heart quivered, it was kind of hard to say thank you properly. Pancion calmly waited for my words, making me feel ashamed even more so I quickly calmed myself down. The dizziness and grogginess had disappeared without a trace.

“Um, thank you. If it wasn’t for sir Pancion, I might have collapsed on the spot.”

And I might have been grounded in Ezelot, unable to breathe the outside air ever again.

Despite my thanks, Pancion’s expression was still stiff. He got down on one knee and met my gaze as I sat on the bench. Cold sweat ran through my half-pale complexion.

“If you feel unwell, I will take you to a physician.”

Surprised, I hurriedly waved my hand.

“No, there is absolutely no need for that!”

Were it to reach my mother’s ears, I did not know what kind of reproach I would receive.

“It was because I had a little bit of anemia. It’s not a big problem, so don’t worry too much. Look! I’m totally fine now, aren’t I?”

My voice trembled in the last sentence, but I pretended to be okay and looked down at Pancion. After gazing at me for a while, he let out a small sigh and stood up.

“For some reason, the days I meet the young lady are always full of turmoil. But in a case like today, I’m glad I could help.”

As I pondered over the past at his words, Pancion sat down next to me.

“That’s not true. Our first meeting and second meeting were quite normal. Well, sure I didn’t know you were the young lord of the Entera duchy at the time,…I only had a deep impression.”

Apparently, I was holding a vase at the time. I couldn’t remember exactly why I was holding the vase, but I could clearly recall Pancion’s face as he casually approached me and put flowers in it. It was those same gentle and elegant violet eyes that were in front of me now.

It was amazing. I never thought I would have a casual conversation with the man who left a strong impression on me at the time.

“…Deep impression?”

“Of you? Yes of course. I was only 15 at the time, and there had not been a knight I found as perfect as the young duke. As you know, brother Lockherd has an image far from that of an imperial knight I have in mind.”

The wind was cool even though the beginning of summer was approaching, perhaps because we were by the lake.

“Just in case you don’t know but, by ‘deep impression’ I didn’t mean it negatively. Rather, it felt a little flustered and abashed. But-,but that doesn’t mean I fell for the young duke or something…”

It felt like I was adding unnecessary words, but I didn’t want to offend him, so I added it as an excuse. I didn’t intend to open my mouth to chatter, but as I continued to talk, my heart gradually calmed down. As if reading my thoughts, Pancion quietly made eye contact and slightly raised the corner of his mouth.

“I thought I was the only one who felt that way. Maybe that’s why, hearing that from the young lady made me feel a little…”

He stopped short of speaking and turned his gaze to the lakeside. As if he was mentioning an uncomfortable fact, his slightly distorted eyes were clearly visible from the side.

“It’s a little…wavering.”

Could it be that I made a mistake? After blinking stupidly, I also turned to the lakeside. It was unintentional, but it was quiet as if everything had stopped except for the occasional footsteps and noise. There was no coversation between him and me, nor was there unbearable awkwardness. I just kept my mouth shut, going along with the atmosphere. The lake, reflecting the Milky Way, under the dark night sky, wasn’t too bad of a sight.

It was that moment…

(Pow)!

The golden firecrackers rose up to decorate the vast night sky.

Startled by the loud noise, my shoulders shuddered. The golden light reflected from the surface, turning the surroundings white, as if it had been dawn and a new day had come.

“Come to think of it, today is the last day of the Victory Celebration. It seems I’ve been too busy with work so far.”

Pancion’s face also turned bright whenever the firecrackers exploded into colourful lights. While staring at him wordlessly, my eyes met with Pancion’s again. At that, I quickly turned my face away. I was even more startled than when the fireworks went off. It wasn’t like I got caught stealing or something, but it truly felt like I had committed a serious crime.

“I-I didn’t notice either. I knew the festival would be long, but I never imagined it would last close to two weeks.”

“If the festival wasn’t the purpose, what did you come to the capital for?”

“To go out, to buy gifts…Literally, it’s just for that much.”

Since the firecrackers were not too far away, so if I mumbled a little, my voice would be all muffled. I raised my head for a moment and looked at the light that was more colourful than flowers, and then opened my mouth in a slightly louder voice than before.

“I was thinking about it, and I think it’s good that I ran into the young duke. May I ask you a question?”

“Of course.”

“What kind of gifts do men like?”

At my words, Pancion’s face became serious as if he was in agony.

“It depends on what kind of relationship it is. Is he your family?”

“Just…anyone.”

“Anyone…”

Is the range too wide? Still, it was unbearably embarrassing to point out Nezar. However, since everyone in the Empire knew that Nezar and I were engaged, he might have noticed something.

The lines that formed his gentle eyes, which were now narrowed, were so delicate that no sculpted statues in this park could ever compare. Soon, Pancion parted his lips in the midst of the bustling sound of firecrackers.

“Lady Katrina, I-…”

However, his voice could not overcome the sound of the light bursting. I furrowed my brows and leaned my shoulders forward a little.

“Could you say it again? I can’t hear you because of the sound of firecrackers!”

At that time, the distance that had been preserved by two spans narrowed in an instant. Being so close, his breath, touching the tip of my nose, traced down my cheek and stopped at my ear. His low voice, which once seemed far away, became very clear.

“Look at me.”

Pancion then took my hand and brought it to his lips. His lips, which hovered lightly on the back of my hand as if saying greetings to it, slowly go down and touch my knuckles. I felt his tightly closed lips part slightly. A breath hotter than steam squeezed between my fingers. Eventually, I got into tinnitus and couldn’t hear a single thing. As if all my senses were now focused on the fingers he touched.

His hot lips pressed against my finger. Not long after, he let go of my hand with a slower movement than ever before.

“Do you understand? Usually, men like this.”