Marryin Off The Spinster

That night, Kenny was starting to get anxious as she tried to prep herself for what's coming next. Earlier, she had expressed to her mom that she will try looking for a job. Determination in her eyes was just for a moment of urgency. However, it seems like she's hesitating now.

'This is what I want.' she thought. She put her right hand to feel her heart beating fast. Kenny stood up from the floor and walk around her room. Then she sat down again. A little later, she stood up, cleared up her room, table, and dresser; took out her laptop from her file cabinet, turned it on, and clicked Word Doc.u.ment icon on the taskbar.

'Are people like me? Or am I really different?' she worriedly thought about herself.

'Why can't I be like my colleagues or like Martha? I'm already old enough to marry and have children, but why am I like this? I can't turn back the tide to return to my younger years and change the past.'

Tapping her left fingers nervously on the table side, she held the mouse on her free hand, opening the browser's home page. Her hands refused to move; her mind's running wild, she needs organize her thoughts. It's been over a year already, how come she's still afraid about work? Why is she so skeptical about it? What is she afraid of? Only Kenny knows the answer, not even her friends knew about it.

People might think she's a pampered woman who's living under her parent's name in the society, or a lazy woman who relies on her parents to be fed, or a professional who's an incompetent person, but you'll never know not unless you try looking deep down inside her without prejudice. What they didn't know is that she's one woman with dignity and pride.

However, good things are hovered over by negativity.

And what's worse, Kenny even believes her own lies.

Kenny stayed up late in the evening convincing herself to move forward. Whatever she's planning for the week was written down on her planner. She badly relied to it. Forgetting things is another matter that is quite a burden for her. That's why she has come into conclusion that she need not stress herself anymore or push the matter if it'll make her go ga-ga again. At this point, she surfed the net, visiting her other media accounts, which she haven't open for seven long years.

Right after, she went to sleep.

In the morning, Kenny was woken up by her mom. Her mom's always busy, the kind that never settles down, working and serving their Christian Community rather than put her mind at family matters. In short, workaholic. Many times she yearned for a loving and understanding mom which is quite unrealistic of her. She's grateful enough her Mom's still alive.

Kenny g.r.o.a.n.e.d, disturbed from her sleep. "Ma, I have washed your uniforms yesterday. Why do I need to wash your garments today?" She sat down down while rubbing her eyes. "I haven't even washed mine. Why not pay a person to do the laundry?"

"I'm always busy at work, unlike you, who's always free." Her mom calmly said with a heavier meaning to it which implied 'You don't have work. You're like a freeloader here, getting all lazed up for the entire year.' if one would be smart enough to decipher those words. For a moment, she just let it pass her ears, as if it didn't matter, but later throughout the rest of the day, as she thought about it again, she got troubled and it made her feel depressed. She knows her mom's not bad, she's really not the sweet daughter type nor her mom's the type she's always read from novels. "We can save money. And I'm old."

The thought of doing laundry is not that bad. It's not like she's lazy, she's just used at doing men's work. Being boyish all her life did not help her get acquainted with women's usual house work like: sewing, cooking, folding clothes, or even laundry. It never piqued her interests. It bores her. Her siblings and Kenny grew up washing their own clothes. Or else, no one would care whether you've got anything to wear.

However, to impress her parents, and to avoid being told a 'burden' and a 'freeloader', which she already feels like ever since loosing her job, she agreed to it. Though, she is still on a job hunting dilemma, she tried to shift her focus on what she'll do today.

After her mom and other family members left, she went down to eat breakfast. Toby, her youngest sibling, was left eating. Kenny looked around. In her mind she sighed. 'These people really are messy.' She walked to the sink, got eating utensils from the plate rack, and sat down beside her brother.

"Toby, right after you're done eating, kindly take out the trashes, okay?"

"Huh? Why me?" Toby answered, creased his brows, reluctance in his voice. Kenny was dumbfounded.

Kenny raised an eyebrow. Surprised at how easily he turned the task down. "Why you, you say?" There's a hint of iritation in her tone, trying to calm herself down. "Well, let me tell you, that's part of doing house chores." She said as a matter of fact.

"Is it your task to do house chores? You don't work. It's our parents who are feeding us." Toby was a lazy person. He doesn't like doing things at home. He's the reason why Kenny and her parents don't get along sometimes.

"Hah. You're classes starts at one and all you do every morning is go out and play computer games at the internet Cafe. You sure are spoiled by mom." Kenny sneered at him.

"I'm calling Mom." Toby was about to stand up when Kenny pulled him back into the chair.

"Hey, let me get it straight. I maybe haven't work yet, but I never was our family's burden. I never ask for anything, to buy things or even go out with friends. I am trying to ease our parent's burden instead."

"And one thing. I'm not our family's maid. We share the chores while we're at it. You only need to take the trashes out. No need to insult me. Show some respect." Kenny stood up, trying to suppress her tears, leaving his brother who just shrugs his shoulder off.