Music System in a Cultivation World: What the F*ck

i reluctantly put on the pink sandals and realized that they completely blended in with the surroundings.

great. just great.

i'm wearing a white cultivator's robe. a pointy crown-thingy that's gold to hold all my hair. an off-white belt.

and pink f*cking sandals.

in a pink f*cking forest.

oh god. i'm now pink riding hood. wait. that doesn't seem right. it should be, uh... pink cultivator sandals...?

someone flay me alive right now. system.

< yes, host? >

we shall never speak of this incident ever again.

< ... >

（╬ಠ益ಠ) system. i'll kill you.

< ... >

"so, disciple yahui," master spoke up from my right, and i swiveled my head to his direction. he was nonchalantly walking through the forest, not even flinching when he crunched and destroyed everything in his path.

i even felt bad for the worms.

< ( ՞ਊ ՞)☞ >

don't think you're out of the clear yet, f*cker. one day, i'll turn you into an actual, living being. wanna know why?

< ? >

yeah, don't act dumb with me. it's all just so i can kill you.

you have been warned.

"yes, master?" i smiled a grin so wide i was sure it was about to split my face in half. i don't know why, but master's left eye seemed to twitch.

"ahem." he averted his eyes. "when was the last time you had seen disciple zhou?"

the last time i saw junior brother? uh... i thought back.

we were about to enter the forest and i noticed how, er, pink it was. then we entered it and uh... yeah. i don't remember. there wasn't anything signaling him being gone... wait!

my voice. i couldn't call out to junior brother. i don't exactly know whether or not it happened immediately after i lost junior brother, but i know junior brother was gone before i had lost the ability to speak.

but wait. why could i speak now, then?

"what are you thinking about, disciple yahui?" master curiously tilted his head, a slight and charming smile on his old face.

i smiled back and waved my arms in front of my face. "nothing!"

"hmm?"

"really," i nodded. "it seemed nothing was out of the ordinary before junior brother disappeared."

master sighed. "so it seems we have no leads."

no leads? i looked around. then why are we going in this direction? in fact, why are we moving at all if we don't even know where junior brother is in the first place? "master?"

"hmm?"

"where are we going?"

the old man stopped in his tracks and i almost bumped into him, my nose mere inches away from his more-impressive-looking cultivator robes. he took out a fan from god-knows-where and tapped his chin with it. "disciple yahui." he whipped around and i startled.

"y-y-yes?"

"a brilliant question!" master nodded his head in a deep and mysterious way. "i don't know!"

what?

"m-m-master," i raised a hand in a gesture for him to stop. "what do you mean by 'i don't know'?"

"it's exactly that. i don't know."

fuuuuuuuuuuu

why the h*ll are you leading the way then?!?

i've been deceivvvvvveeeeeeeeddddddddddd.