Project: Socialize

I stared at the bunny onesie pajama in the wardrobe cabinet, unable to bring myself to believe that this was happening. I do not know what I've done, but whatever it was, I do not believe that I deserve this... With my head hanging low in depression I stared at the ground, face red from a sense of embarrassment.

Slowly, I forced myself up from the ground in a quick smooth motion and quickly walked over to my desk to grab my phone. I navigated to the contacts list and dialed Noah's number, knowing that out of the three angels, he's the most vulnerable one due to his age and just his demeanor in general.

"Hello," his voice said from the other end of the phone line.

"What the hell is this?" I berated him. "Did you really expect me to wear that onesie pajama?"

My face was quite warm from embarrassment, but I'm pretty sure that mixed in there was anger as well. Whatever the case may be, it's just...well, dissatisfaction.

"You have a problem with what I've picked out?" The voice on the other end of the phone suddenly changed, and instead of Noah's casual and easy-going voice, it was one of a mature woman, the voice of Emilia.

"Emilia?" I gasped softly but soon regained my composure. "Y-you picked out this pajama?"

"Yeah," the voice on the other end said. "You'll look cute."

"C-cute?" I could feel my face muscles twitching somewhat from the mentioning of that adjective. "Me?"

"You'll never know if you don't try it on," she softly chuckled.

Then, the call was ended on their end, leaving me standing there with the bath towel wrapped around my body. Dazed as to what had ended up being my ultimate fate, I slowly turned around and gazed into the wardrobe and at the bunny onesie in there. Slowly, I approached it and took it out of the wardrobe cabinet and stared at it as I felt its soft, downy material with my hands.

Putting it on didn't take as much effort as I had originally anticipated, and it was actually surprisingly comfortable as well. The material was soft and warm and it provided a sense of great security to me. I looked down, allowing my chin to graze against the short, artificial fur and at the pajama. Obstructing my vision was the round and smooth protrusion at my chest due to my breasts, but with some effort, I was able to see the whole outfit.

Wait... I took a small step back in horror. Why do I feel like my personality has changed a bit? Is it because I'm a girl now and see things differently?

Whatever the case may be, I closed the wardrobe cabinet door shut, letting out a sigh as I contemplated what had happened to me. Then, I walked over to this unfamiliar bed in this unfamiliar room and fell down limp on it, allowing my face to be buried in the pillow.

Menstrual products...I thought to myself. Where does Loriana keep them? Do I have to go out and buy them myself?

I then rolled over such that my face was facing the ceiling.

And clothes...I still need to buy clothes for myself. Just the school uniform isn't going to cut it for the month...

Since it was still somewhat early and not exactly the time that I'm used to going to bed at, I decided that I would go sit in the living room for a bit and watch some television. One, this allows me to pass time and two, it allows my hair to dry. I also still have to replace my bath towel in the bathroom towel rack.

I forced myself out of the comfort of my bed, grabbed my phone, and made my way over to the doorway. Upon exiting, I looked to my left at the living room. There, Loriana was sitting on the couch watching television like she so often does. I checked the time on my phone and saw that it was 9:03 PM, meaning that it's not late enough for bed but is late enough for a sense of sluggishness and fatigue to have an influence on our bodies.

From the television came the sound of the show that was being played and hidden behind that was the soft humming of the central air conditioning unit that allowed regulated the room temperature by blowing in warm air. When I started walking, the sound of my feet making contact with the dark wood floor entered the chorus followed with the sound of me laying my body on the open spot on the L shaped couch adjacent to where Loriana was seated at.

"Not going to bed just yet?" Loriana looked over at me.

"Yeah," I nodded. "Not that tired just yet."

"You did sleep for a bit in Alevian's room," Loriana commented.

"Right," I awkwardly laughed as I was reminded of that earlier incident.

"I get that the two of you are particularly close since you're twins but," Loriana paused momentarily and looked away as if in an embarrassed manner. "the two of you aren't kids anymore. You should know about...the physical intimacy boundaries."

"Right," I nodded.

"I wouldn't tell him about what you were doing this morning," she said, blushing somewhat.

Upon her mentioning, I recalled the embarrassing moment that had occurred earlier this morning when she had opened the door and saw me in an...rather awkward position and state. My face turned a bright red color from embarrassment, and when I tried to refute her claim and defend myself by stating the truth, I found myself to be tongue tied.

"Don't worry," Loriana continued. "It's totally normal to want to get satisfaction, but...he's your twin brother..."

"I..." I couldn't say anything, but simply sit there, petrified as I listened to this embarrassing lecture by Loriana. With a deep breath, I reorganized my words and prepared myself to speak once again. "We're not...like that."

"I know," Loriana nodded, but for some reason, there appeared to be a hint of doubt on her face.

***

That night, when I tried to fall asleep in this familiar and yet alien environment that is my new room, I felt...quite uneasy about the whole situation. It's mostly from my unfamiliarity with this new body and this new environment, but I believe that as time goes on, it should steadily improve. However, it's only for a month, so hopefully, this...can end soon and be remembered as a distant dream by me in the future.

The next day, I went to school. I was able to catch Muria waiting in front of the elevator at the same time as before when I was still 'Alevian' and was able to commute to school with her. As a girl, she appeared to be more willing to communicate with me, allowing us to make a short conversation on the train ride to school. When we aren't speaking, I would glance over at her, taking in her countenance. Deep down within me, I repeated what she had said the day before about 'Alevian'. What did she meant by her admiring me and yet despising me for trying to accomplish things on my own? How does that contribute to everything? How does it all relate and tie back together? For some reason, I feel like if I try asking her, she wouldn't give me any more answers, and there is also the possibility that she could make things even more confusing. Looks like I'll just have to find out as time goes on.

The school day went by without much disturbances and everything flowed like they would usually do. However, the only difference today was that I've decided that I would go shopping once school is over. I've decided that this is a mission that I must conduct independently as I must not display or show any signs of my inexperience with female clothing and products to the people that I am the closest to.

When the bell signaling the end of the school day finally rang, everyone got up from their seats and prepared to leave for the club room as before. However, that was not my intention and I must use this opportunity to free myself from the day's after school obligations.

"Hey um," I started speaking, gathering the attention of the others. "I was thinking of maybe skipping the club activity today cause I um...need to go and buy some clothes."

"Shopping for clothes?" Noah looked over at me.

"Yeah," I responded, twirling my fingers together in circles before my chest out of nervousness.

"Let's go together!" Irina exclaimed with joy as she clapped her hands together.

"Huh?" I looked over at her in surprise, and that was when I realized that I've made a mistake by being honest about my intent.

"Muria, let's go with her," Irina continued, speaking to Muria with great enthusiasm.

"Shopping sounds pretty fun," Noah looked over at Loyd.

"Sure," Loyd nodded and closed his eyes. On his face, there was a faint smile. "Just staying in the club room gets quite boring sometimes."

"Alright," Noah said as he took out his phone. "Let me just send it in our group chat so the others know what we're gonna do for today."