Project: Socialize

We got off at a train station in Berjaus, in a pretty prosperous area near the main Berjaus Station. Looking to my sides, I took in the station scene, watching as the pedestrians paid no heed to me, walking past me and headed towards their own train platforms.

From the station broadcasts, I could hear the sound of the various announcements, from the announcements for train arrivals to the soft ambient music of the station. I followed Mura and out of the station. Outside, the rain poured down on the world, and the only way people walked around was with an umbrella.

Muria stared at the sky above, frowning at the weather. I realized that Muria was, in fact, wearing the summer uniform of our school, which, for girls, consisted of a white button up blouse. White, so if it gets wet, it would likely cling onto her skin and become almost see through. Obvious enough, she was aware of this fact.

I dug through my school bag in search of the retractable umbrella that I often carried in my bag just in case. I produced that umbrella from my bag and handed it towards Muria.

"Here," I said without looking over at her.

"..."

Muria stared at the umbrella in my outstretched hand and then at me. She was quite surprised, dazed almost, to see this gesture from me.

"Thank you," she said, accepting the umbrella from my hands.

"Not going to give one to me?" Mura teasingly smiled and nudged me gently with her elbow.

"You two can share one," I said, backing off slightly from her.

"How about you, Emilia?" Mura turned towards her and asked.

"Don't worry," Emilia responded as she reached her hand into her purse and took out an umbrella as well.

"Both of you came prepared," Mura smiled. "Let's go now."

Muria then put up the umbrella that I handed her, stepped to the side slightly, and allowed her older sister to share the umbrella with her. Since it was a retractable umbrella, it was smaller in size than the normal ones, which made it so that the two of them had to stand quite close, shoulder to shoulder.

As I stood there, mentally preparing myself to be drenched, I saw from the corner of my eye Emilia, putting up her umbrella and lifted the umbrella up slightly, gesturing for me to come closer. I stared at the hand in which she clutched onto the umbrella with in confusion, and then I gazed up at her face, discovering a smile on her face along with a mysterious facial expression that I can not read.

"I'm fine—"

Just when I was about to decline, Emilia closed the distance between us, and with her free hand, she grabbed onto my arm so that I could not escape.

As I walked beside Emilia while we shared a small umbrella, our arms occasionally brushed against each other's. It was quite an intriguing feeling due to how soft and cool her arm was. I glanced over at her face, admiring the unreadable poker face that she constantly had on.

It bothered me that despite the fact that I can gaze into her eyes, I don't see anything. It was like a wall has been raised, protecting her heart from all outside intervention. Like someone hiding in a fortress, she appeared quite ambivalent in regards to the outside world, yet for some reason it felt as if she cared for this world. Maybe it was because she's an angel of God, but still it felt as if there's a more personal emotion mixed within it.

That mysterious look in her eyes perplexed me, making me quite fearful of her. I had only known her for a few hours, and yet it would seem that our distance was closing in quite rapidly. It was a pace that I'm not used to, and it made me quite wary of her. The only thing that I know about her was the fact that she's sent by God to monitor me. But why? Was it what happened that night that prompted this investigation? Was it something that Ralus had done?

These feelings for the unknown accompanied me as I walked alongside her. In front of me, the two sisters walked while Muria held the umbrella up. In her eyes I could see a happiness that I rarely see from her, and in addition to that, on her face, although it might be considered faint, was the brightest smile that I've seen her exhibit.

So she could be like a normal girl...

I can tell that Muria probably is quite fond of her sister, and that the two share a close relationship. From their interactions, all I could sense was a wholesome atmosphere, and mixed within it was Muria's admiration for her older sister.

"They look quite happy," Emilia leaned closer to me and whispered.

"Yeah," I responded without shifting my gaze over to her. "Because they're family."

"Do you desire a relationship like theirs?"

"Not right now," I sighed, blinking once and keeping my gaze trained on the world before me. "I probably did before, but not now."

I frowned, recalling the shattered dreams of my childhood when I first saw my mother cheating. It all changed that day, my character, my world, and my meaning.

"Why is that?" Emilia continued.

"Just because," I responded, trying to keep my past concealed to keep our scales balanced in terms of intel. However, I don't reckon that it would work on my end since she's divine.

"Your only family right now," Emilia continued, "its Loriana, correct?"

"Yeah," I said. "At least she's the only one who's willing to take me in. My grandparents on my father's side died already, and he had no siblings except her. As for my mother's side...that's different."

"Do you want that family bond?" Emilia asked.

"I don't care for it much to be honest. It's the same to me whatever."

"Why do you say that?"

"I don't know," I chuckled, mocking my own loneliness as I looked up at the tall buildings that lined the side of the road. "Probably because I've forgot what that feeling is since it's been so long since my family has been whole...but it's probably fractured before that." I remembered the mother's affair. "Probably way before that..." I muttered.

"So you do not seek a familial bond?"

"Like I said," I repeated, "I forgot what that feeling is like. Loriana has to work quite often to sustain herself and I, and since I am like a burden to her, I can't bring myself to ask more from her."

I glanced over at Emilia, and realized that she was staring at me and waiting for me to continue.

"It's because of me she can't enjoy a normal life that she's supposed to enjoy," I continued. "If it wasn't for me, she would've probably married already. If it wasn't for me, her life would've been so much better. Yet she still does not blame me for anything...I'll be forever in debt to her. It's a debt that I can never pay off, and yet 'that' happened last night..."

"Why do you think it happened?"

"I don't know," I sighed. "I just..." I paused and glanced over at Emilia, knowing that she has a history with Ralus and was careful to not offend her. "I just heard Ralus's voice in my head, and it was like I lost control of my body. Like my primitive instincts just took over and blocked out all of my rationality."

"So it is Ralus..." Emilia frowned as she gazed at the ground before her.

"Was there something between the two of you?" I asked, staring at the side of her face and trying to glimpse into her eyes.

"Yeah," she nodded. "Since you told me so much, I'll tell you a bit as well." She inhaled and exhaled deeply. "We...we used to be quite close, attracted to each other as someone of the opposite gender."

So they were dating...

"And...sometime ago he seemed to have changed into an entirely different person," she said. "It was a slow change, and none of us in Heaven knew about it. It was all so gradual that I did not realize until something was truly wrong with him...Lucifer he—"

"Lucifer?" I asked.

"That's...nothing." Emilia adverted my glance and looked in the direction of the road. "Well...Ralus...he...became quite different. He was still kind and gentle towards me while we walked the Gardens of Eden, but...he appeared to have developed a sort of disdain for Heaven, especially towards God."

She appeared obviously saddened by this recounting of the change that Ralus had underwent.

"No longer did he design tests based off of virtue," Emilia said. "Instead, he would base all his trials around desires...the very sins that we were taught since young to avoid."

Taught? Do they have a school in Heaven or something? If so, then who teaches? Don't tell me it's that God.

"And you know the rest," Emilia concluded and turned to gaze back into my eyes once again. "Luci—Ralus," she immediately changed what she was about to say and corrected her slip up. "He seems quite interested in you. It would be best if you be careful around him."

"I know," I nodded as I stared down at the road ahead.

We then walked in silence after having shared a brief conversation with each other. I don't really understand why but I had told her more than I had ever told anyone else about my family. Maybe it was because she's an angel, but there's something else in this new relationship that I am building with her. Maybe it's the fact that we are borderline strangers to each other and certain things one can only tell a stranger.