Scourge the Entertainment Industry

"Hello everyone, I'm your favorite Hanhan, and I wish my family New Year's greetings!"

When Zhao Zihan came out and spoke, the audience at the scene and in front of the TV were a little stunned.

Why does this man feel so weird today?

A little... angry.

Just like Wang Wu, full of surprises and fun!

When the audience was stunned, Li Bo, who was pretending to be an audience, suddenly shouted, "Zihan, I love you! I want to give you monkeys!"

"Oh, this fan, don't take pictures, don't take pictures," he said, don't take pictures, and his body really matched all kinds of shapes, typical of disgusting uprightness.

"Kakaka" took several photos of Zhao Zihan, and Li Bo also stepped onto the stage before revealing the identity of his assistant.

Li Bo said: "Sister, you said that I will be your assistant again, and occasionally a guest fan. You make me feel very insecure."

Zhao Zihan's eyes went blank: "It's useless to adjust, I tell you, the actor who came here today is called Xie Tian, ​​and he is my college classmate. He was with me in college and was kicked by me later. I hold grudges!"

"Speak ill of me every day, today we must extinguish his arrogance!"

"Appreciate~~~"

The audience under the stage booed again, as expected of a childhood sweetheart, and they all said the same thing.

By the way, who kicked the two of you!

One wave after another, the audience at the scene screamed again, and Xie Tian and Wang Wu also came to the main stage.

The two greeted strangely, Zhao Zihan coughed dryly and said hoarsely.

"My, my voice is not very good recently." After speaking, he gestured towards Li Bo.

Li Bo suddenly said: "Ah, what our sister Han means is that we miss you after not seeing you for a long time. Why are your bags under your eyes a little heavy?"

Xie Tian blinked and said, "My throat is not good lately," and winked at Wang Wu.

Wang Wu looked at him blankly, but did not respond.

Seeing this, Xie Tian gave him a wink again.

Only then did Wang Wu understand, and said loudly, "My son is going to have a urinary catheter inserted!"

Ha ha ha ha.

There was another burst of laughter.

Xie Tian quickly pulled Wang Wu aside: "What are you talking about, who is your son! Am I your son?"

Wang Wu: "Then you are my father!"

Xie Tian: "Can I be my own uncle? It's all haunted!"

"You can't call me son, you call me Brother Tian"

Wang Wu raised his hand, "I'll kick you, believe it or not!"

"Hahaha!"

"Being an uncle for yourself, what kind of generation is this!"

"Let my own father call me brother! Hahaha, how dare you say it!"

After negotiating the title, he returned to Zhao Zihan, and Wang Wudao said, "My brother, I want to insert a urinary catheter!"

Some Wang Wu fans have an inexplicable feeling in their hearts when they look at this sketch.

My fifth brother, who is tough but elegant, is a righteous man, how...how can I become a greasy little fat man with a full beard.

but! Such a fifth brother... why is it so fun!

It's so funny, pull the catheter out at every turn!

The sketch is still going on, and Xie Tian is going crazy: "Why are you unable to get through with the intubation, is this the meaning of the intubation? Isn't this the meaning of drinking water!"

Wang Wu reacted and shouted: "My brother Tian wants to drink water!"

Xie Tian angrily said: "You go to me, what are you yelling at people!"

Wang Wu went to get water for Xie Tian, ​​and Zhao Zihan said, "Why, Xiaotian, he always wants to pull out the urinary catheter for you, the kidney is not very good!"

Xie Tian explained two sentences, and Wang Wu took out a canned bottle with tea in it.

Upon seeing this, Zhao Zihan smiled strangely: "Xiao Tian, ​​your drinking vessel is quite unique!"

After watching it for a few minutes, the audience burst into laughter.

"This can is so down-to-earth!"

"And pulling out the catheter and inserting the catheter!"

"This is really a father!"

They were all laughing and out of breath. Before they could even breathe, Wang Wu's phone rang on the stage.

After saying a few words, he said to Xie Tian, ​​"Brother Tian, ​​my daughter-in-law is looking for you!"

"puff!"

When the audience saw this, they spit it out.

Hahaha, your mother called, see what you say this time!

This must be worn!

Xie Tian suddenly wanted to cry without tears. He glanced left and right, and said with the phone away from him, "It's that... brother and sister~~~ Mom"

When talking about mom, he quickly put the phone to his ear, trying to make a time difference.

It's useless to hide your ears and steal the bell, let my mother give me a training session, and after the phone call, she said to Wang Wu: "I told you...why is your daughter-in-law so temperamental, how can you train me like you're training a son? Woolen cloth."

"Hahaha"

You are her son, but you are training her son!

Wang Wudao: "Then there is something wrong with my daughter-in-law. I'll take care of her when I go back."

Zhao Zihan said: "Bobo, sister has been standing here for more than two minutes, and I'm tired."

Li Bo Yang said: "Understood!"

Xie Tian: "I'm tired from standing too, give me the whole chair!"

Wang Wu: "A chair?"

Xie Tian: "Chair, the assistant's chair!"

Wang Wu: "I'm sick with a chair when I go out!"

As soon as he finished speaking, Li Bo brought a chair to Zhao Zihan.

Xie Tian looked at it and asked Wang Wu, "Where do I sit!"

Wang Wu looked around and put the luggage roll he was carrying on the ground.

"Come on, sit here, soft!"

Zhao Zihan looked at the luggage roll on the ground and said in surprise: "Yeah! The crew didn't arrange a room for you, I plan to sleep here!"

"Hahaha, Master Han is too vicious!"

"It's all paved, this is still a star!"

Afterwards, the two of them compared what they had done recently, but they were all award-winning movies when they heard it, and they said again with their tongues straight.

Then Zhao Zihan wanted to drink red wine, but Xie Tian was not willing to follow, and asked Wang Wu to bring him wine, but it turned out to be dipping vinegar!

Substituting vinegar for wine, Xie Tian fully demonstrated why it is called a sour girl!

In the applause of the audience, I drank a full glass of vinegar!

Since Xie Tian and the others came on stage, the laughter of the whole scene has not stopped, not only them, but also the audience in front of the TV.

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"Hahaha, this sketch is too funny, Teacher Xie really lived up to the expectations of the people of the country."

"Aha! I'm going to die laughing, it's so coke, Lafite in bulk, this is a big brand and there are products that are close to the people. I'll buy a few pounds and try it someday."

"This bulk Lafite will definitely be the buzzword next year!"

"Don't forget, there's another sentence...Intubation!"

"Pfft! Hahahaha!"

"Master Han winked at you, Teacher Xie winked to pull out the urinary catheter, Master Han got a chair when he was tired, Master Xie was a luggage roll when he was tired, Master Han drinks red wine, Teacher Xie just drinks vinegar, what kind of assistant is this? Ah, this is a comparison! Master Han is hanging and beating Teacher Xie!"

Grandpa's house.

Everyone in the Lao Xie family couldn't help laughing.

Xie Yu wiped the tears from the corner of his eyes and said with a smile: "I laughed so hard, I always thought that Xiaotian could be so cheap, but I didn't expect Master Han to be so shy."

Mother Xie said with a smile: "This worthless thing is bullied by Zihan in reality, and he has to be run by others to play a sketch. He is completely helpless!"

Concubine Zhang's house.

The family was overjoyed to watch it, but while Concubine Zhang's parents laughed, there was an uncomfortable feeling in their hearts.

After all, their concubine Zhang was the assistant to the man on TV, so she felt immersed in it!

My own little baby, not to mention that he is carrying luggage rolls for people to carry Lafite in bulk, but it is also distressed that people are instructed to come and go like this!

Concubine Zhang's mother asked nervously: "Yide, Teacher Xie doesn't usually order you like this!"

When Concubine Zhang's father heard this, he immediately looked at her nervously: "Yide, if that's the case, we won't serve him or be bullied, father will support you!"

Concubine Zhang: "..."

He looked fiercely at his unreliable parents.

Who are you two called Yide?

If you leave it outside and be called Third Master every day, you can’t hear it when you go home. Well, it’s not appropriate for your parents to call Third Master, so you two should just call your name!

Thinking like this, she still answered her parents' question. After all, this question touched her itch.

He said proudly: "Hey! I'm with Teacher Xie and the others, who would dare to instruct me! One day I actually instructed them."

Zhang's father and Zhang's mother don't believe it. Your little assistant can still instruct the boss.

Zhang's mother asked, "Then what do you do all day?"

Concubine Zhang replied without thinking: "Eat snacks, play with mobile phones, travel."

From the look on her face, the two knew that she was telling the truth.

so......

Dad Zhang: "..."

Mother Zhang: "..."

Are you still missing someone?

After talking about what Concubine Zhang remembered, she laughed and said with trembling shoulders, "And... pull out the catheter!"

Xie Tian worked hard to perform on the stage and devoted his youth to the studio, while Concubine Zhang arranged herself like this at home.

Thanks to him not knowing, knowing that he can be wronged to death.

On the stage, Xie Tian was afraid to drink this vinegar, so he changed the subject and shouted, "I'm still here to shoot, the director! Director!"

At this time, Zhuangcheng ran over and shouted loudly: "Two teachers!"

Scared Xie Tian to fall from the luggage roll, he sat up and said angrily, "You scared me by talking so loudly, don't you know?"

Zhuangcheng explained: "I have been speaking loudly since I was a child, but I will be quieter."

Then he continued: "Today, we are a play. I will tell you about the play. Teacher Xie Tian invited Teacher Zhao Zihan to dance."

"Then Mr. Zhao Zihan, you just agree to it, it's just such a simple scene."

After the play, Xie Tian and Zhao Zihan exchanged lines.

Xie Tian: "This beautiful lady... The word no is not scientific!"

"Take the beauty away!"

Zhao Zihan said: "Why take away the beauty!"

Xie Tian: "It's obvious that you're not beautiful, it's too imprecise, isn't it obvious to wear it!"

After Zhuangcheng made a round, he continued to speak to the lines.

Xie Tian: "This lady, I want to be passionate about you!"

Zhao Zihan: "Director, I can't make this scene, thank God for being a hooligan! He wants to be passionate about me."

Director: "Mr. Xie, this is your fault, it's not beautiful anymore, and you are still passionate about her doing shit!"

Xie Tian said angrily: "It's just your broken words written here, this lady, I want to be passionate about you!"

The director looked at the script and smiled: "It's not written, ma'am! I want to invite you!"

The audience burst into laughter again.

Passion and invitation are indistinguishable, this is not illiterate!

You can't even recognize the words, what kind of star are you!

After the assistants of the two exchanged words, the filming officially started. Looking at Zhuangcheng, who was stunned by Xie Tianxun, the audience inside and outside the venue was already full of emotion.

What a bad director! It's no wonder that this director can make good works!

After that, we arrived at the most exciting place of this sketch!

Xie Tian looked at Zhao Zihan with a rich expression, and said emotionally, "567."

Zhao Zihan said shyly, "12."

The audience was stunned, not acting, how could they count.

Then react.

This is using numbers instead of lines.

Then there was a burst of laughter!

It's embarrassing for you to have such a rich and emotional expression!

Why not say your lines so well?

Zhuangcheng rushed over and said, "Two teachers, aren't we dancing? Why are we counting?"

Xie Tiandao: "I'm in a lot of emotions, and your dubbing in the later stage is not over!"

Zhuangcheng: "Let's talk at the same time, there are not many words in one word, can't you remember one sentence?"

Zhao Zihan: "That's right! Can't remember a word?"

Xie Tian: "You don't talk to me about that useless thing. You only have two words with those 12 words. Do you remember?"

Zhao Zihan: "I'm not 12 to cooperate with you."

Xie Tian: "You give me one and I'll listen to it."

Zhao Zihan: "Okay!"

Hahaha!

Who can't remember just two words!

Are you stupid to ask this question?

Zhuangcheng: "That's the word, that's right."

Xie Tian was unconvinced and said: "She has two words, I have eleven words, right, is there any comparison!"

"Let me tell you, this is an eleven-word line, why don't you give it to me for the first six months!"

"A normal person can remember eleven words at once!"

As soon as these words came out, the audience was miserable and laughed miserably.

Eleven words you memorize for half a year!

Isn't that so retarded!

Normal people can remember eleven words at once, but it is abnormal if they can't remember them!

Apparently Zhao Zihan thought so too, sarcastically: "My God, you memorize eleven words for half a year? Isn't this mentally retarded?"

Xie Tian said unconvinced: "Don't pretend to me, if you can't, let's change. These eleven words are for you."

Zhao Zihan exaggeratedly said: "I'm crazy! Eleven words! I won't change it! I'm guilty of that!"

Seeing this, the audience was completely laughing.

Okay! After talking for a long time, it would be difficult for you to co-author these eleven words, right?

After watching it for 20 minutes, these two are mentally handicapped.

The audience on and off the field laughed when they saw this, and the voice became louder and louder, and the more they thought about it, the more they felt funny.

Unlike Xie Tian's previous life, the fact that Xiao Xianrou relies on counting has long been exposed, and the audience can see the irony when watching this sketch.

There is no such thing here, so the audience just finds it fun to watch this sketch, and there is a strong sense of contrast!

Wang Wu, who had pulled out the catheter and inserted the catheter before, and these two people, one is the best supporting actor and the other is the best actress.

They are all the top actors in China. As a result, I couldn't even memorize eleven words in this sketch. The acting lines were all counted.

Can such a big contrast be unhappy!

At the same time, I didn't make too many associations in my heart, just regarded it as thank God,

Come up with funny jokes.

No one could have imagined that before the incident in the previous life was exposed.

Actors don't say their lines when filming, just count with that!

Who can believe this!

Isn't this a fantasy?

But reality is always full of drama, and some things are even more exaggerated than in film and television dramas!

On the stage, Xie Tian said that he would not act without changing his words. At Zhuang Cheng's begging, he agreed to continue shooting after saying that he didn't need to remember dead words.

Xie Tian said perfunctorily, "Dance."

Zhao Zihan also said casually: "Let's go!"

"knock off!"

The more unprofessional they are, the bigger the contrast and the more the audience laughs.

How could it be so perfunctory, Zhuangcheng begged again, these two people reluctantly agreed, and their expressions were richer.

Shoot again.

Xie Tian responded to Zhao Zihan's "tsk" eyes~www.wuxiahere.com~ Zhao Zihan raised his eyebrows in response, and then it was over.

Zhuangcheng stopped them and said, "Two teachers, why hasn't this word been fixed yet?"

Xie Tian said angrily: "What you say must be emotional, and the acting must be rich, and you have to speak Chinese dialect, I have not achieved that!"

Director: "Then you tut, why should I type subtitles?"

Xie Tian: "You ask me about such a professional thing, if you are the director, ask me if you are! You are too much!"

"What do you think of our actors! If you are still a director like this, I will ask you if you want shame! You say you want shame!"

At this time, Wang Wu said: "You have to be shameless!"

Xie Tian: "Look at my assistant asking if you want shame!"

Wang Wu threw the script in his hand on Xie Tian and shouted, "I'm asking you!"

"it is good!"

The audience is banging better!

Although the sketch is quite cola, the two actors in it are really shameless.

What a mess.

It is time for someone to educate them well!

Next, Wang Wu gave Xie Tian, ​​Zhao Zihan and Zhuang Cheng a meal!

Wang Wu: "Dare you dare to let the audiences who like you see you, what kind of virtue is behind the scenes!"

"I tell you! How you treat the audience, the audience will treat you as you do!"

"If the audience doesn't support you, you are nothing!"

"it is good!"

There was a louder applause from the scene!

I agree with Wang Wu's words.

The audience does not support you, what are you! Also count, shameless!

Those fans of Wang Wu are relieved at this moment, even if they grow a beard and gain weight.

Fifth brother is still the righteous fifth brother.

It's not just about pulling out the catheter and inserting the catheter!

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