So why me

43 TV self-destruction

02:45pm Paris time

In a television studio, during the live broadcast of a television program for a small cable channel, Adam wonders what could have gone through Meg's head to get him to appear in such a program for which he has no qualifications. For the past hour, as a guest, he has been responsible for assigning marks and commenting on the performance of young people wishing to break into the world of music. When these young people between the ages of 15 and 25 sing in English, Adam, who understands the words, sometimes massacred by a Frenchy accent more disgusting than his Spanish, can say one or two words, but the rest of the time, fearing to offend these young people and to shatter their hopes, he plays the hypocrite, contenting himself with various positive banalities, imitating jurors at the soft-hearted of American television programs.

Against a backdrop of Radiohead's Creep, Adam feels that nausea is not far away. Ugly orchestration, horrible English accent, voice that sometimes derails and song so false that he seems to hear a cat of wich stepped on its tail. When the young man finishes his very personal interpretation of Adam's favourite band wuo clenching his teeth, his heart, which cannot let his mouth compliment this singing troll who is already in front of him, drops everything that he has retained in him throughout this TV program.

"If I remember your previous presentation well, I believe you are a mason by profession. Listen carefully because it is for your own good, as well as for the good of everyone's ears. Take back your shovel, plaster and trowel and never go up on a stage again because your singing would break the ears of a hearing impaired person. Honestly, man, I wonder how you even dreamed of becoming a singer with a shitty level like yours. Ahhh, it feels good to be honest after saying so much crap to all the competitors who have gone before you, because don't worry, your far from being the only one with no talent. Good luck on the building sites and to the next one."

Behind the scenes, Meg is also overwhelmed by Adam's behavior. Sorry and very angry, she puts her hand on her forehead when she sees Adam with a very satisfied smile on his face, proudly returning to his place. The rest of the show gets worse and Meg gets very anxious when she realizes that the everyday Adam is now on the television set of many people. The catastrophe continues comment after comment and the indecency that Adam now shows, grows crescendo. As she hears his last 10 comments he reserves for the candidates, Meg collapses completely, depressed at the thought that he is completely wasting all the opportunities that are offered to him from his first TV appearance.

"I love your smile and your eyes are beautiful. I would have invited you to the restaurant tonight with the greatest pleasure if I had the time. It is a pity that my agent is very cruel and has concocted a schedule for me that no longer even allows me to pee. Next."

"Your mouth is very wide. You're wasting your time trying to become a singer. I have an idea of what you could do with it, but saying it here would be a little inappropriate. Next."

"Why do you scream like that when you sing? Do you have any pain anywhere? Go see a doctor, man. When you came here, did you see the hospital sign somewhere? You went the wrong way, this is not the best place to get treatment. To the next one"





Following Adam's statements that Meg herself found shameful, cruel or irrelevant, apart from the cameramen and various staff members who were laughing and looking forward to the next one, the production did not laugh and did not greet them when they left the TV studio. On the way home, after this first day of intensive work, Meg remains quieter than ever. Her calm and usual good mood being replaced by an anger that she had never felt before. She fears to open her mouth and let her fury explode against the one who for her right now is only the biggest idiot she has ever known.

For his part, Adam, conscious of having acted a little impulsively, tries as he can to make amends, but in vain. This time, although his intelligence this afternoon was close to zero, he nevertheless understands that his pretty Meg will not forgive him so easily for this misconduct.

°°°

"Adam, you idiot, as I told you, you'll never change. Even if I chew you all the work, you find a way to scuttle yourself the day after you sign your contract. Jeff, block all possible reruns. Ensure that the various groups manage their newspapers, FM radios and television channels and prohibit any broadcasting of snippets of this horror or comments about this program. Find my father's team of geeks and make sure they destroy at the source any rumours that may be spread on the Internet. That any recording of this mess be immediately removed and offer bonuses to keep the mouths of those who attended this television show hermetically sealed. If I have missed something, I am counting on you, whose job it is, to remedy it. You may leave now."

Preparing for a fashion show, currently backstage, dressed in a long silver evening gown, her personal hairdresser giving the finishing touch to her hair, Jessica sighs as she thinks of Adam's unlimited stupidity who since their reunion, has definitely given her a lot of work.

"Miss Benson, it will soon be your turn. You should get closer to the catwalk."

"How much time do I have left?"

"About five minutes, but the rule is..."

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