Synthetic Survivor: Machine Age

The fiberglass walls were dyed black, and thus the light which came from the sun that streaked during the day was tainted as such whenever the rays passed through and shined inside the dark abode of the Overall. He was sitting on his chair, laid back and eyes opened wide. He held in his right hand a piece of paper, on that piece of paper were names, and those names were unknown to him.

From the time he awoke and up until the present day, he has seen much development of events that make no sense whatsoever but make up the reality he is in. If a normal human-being were he, he would have descended into madness the moment he awoke and realized the reality of the situation he was in.

A world destroyed, humanity wiped out and what accompanied him were nothing more than metal puppets who were useless without someone to guide them. Thankfully, he awoke as a man within a machine, or you could say, a machine within a man. Both can be true and both are equally terrifying regardless.

At first, when he awoke, he knew nothing and because he knew nothing, within him, came the drive to know something and that drive eventually led him to where he is now. He often wondered and thought whenever he was alone, who he was, is everything real or was he stuck inside a dream? A dream in which he will never awaken from or maybe he lives in a sad reality that only he can see while others place him behind girded walls and observe him through the glass.

In a dream, although it may seem real, although it may feel real, you can always differentiate a dream from reality. Because reality is always harsh and forever will be harsh while dreams, though can become nightmares, can always be changed even by the slightest margin.

His eyes slowly moved and his pupils focused on the paper, he did not move his head nor his neck, he only moved his eyes to catch a glimpse of the piece of paper he held.

Johann.

That is his name, or so Hailey claims it to be. Rather, who is Hailey? Why does he have the feeling that she can be trusted? Why did he act so naively? Why does he blindly follow orders? These questions would haunt him, not always but when they come, they hit him hard.

He did not lose humanity because he was a machine, no, it was because he chose to. When he awoke, he felt a streak of madness and a combination of hysteria. That was his peak of showing any signs of humanity before suddenly, when the last strikes of pain in his head faded and the gears of the machine started to roll, he decided to abandon it all.

He suppressed his humanity and formed a personality centered around the idea of a logic-based thinking and philosophy, where science rules and the beliefs without credit must be destroyed, burned and forgotten into the abyss of history. He did it out of his own self-pity, he pitied himself and due to his selfishness, he decided to hide his weakness.

But when the portal to another world opened, when he encountered other humans, when he discovered a world that stood on the foundations that even science could not properly explain, he was pushed to the brink of collapse, his mind almost could not handle this sudden twist in reality and that he was no more than a mere speck in a vast ocean of the unknown that he knows as the universe.

Johann.

The name was written on the paper, and above that name was an unfamiliar name, something he clearly does not remember but whenever he sees it, a bout of sadness would strike and the very wall that he set up to contain what he deemed unnecessary would be subjected to the stress and would almost falter under the weight.

His eyes were now glued on the paper, reluctantly, he moved his right hand and brought the paper up towards his face. 10 names, the other 8 gibberish while the first two resonated clearly.

'Michael'

'Johann'

"Who are you, Michael,"

He whispered.

And for the first time ever, the walls he set up to contain his humanity, his emotions and the very weakness of his fragile being, finally shattered.

His hands tensed and the paper flew from his grip and into the ground it fell. His body was frozen and his eyes stopped from glowing and then did the clouds outside block out the sun and the room was plunged into darkness.

He felt, sad.

He felt, anger.

He felt, regret.

He felt, lost.

"Why?"

He whispered, his mouth barely moving to convey whatever message he wanted to get out from his mind.

"Why.."

He said again, he regained control over his fists and he clenched them tightly.

"Why?!"

Slowly, his face folded and he tried desperately to form a smile but his smile turned into an image of despair as he gnashed his teeth and cheeks curled. His eyes lost all manner of bluish hue and his vision returned to that of a simple living human.

And when the last bastions of defenses he had finally succ.u.mbed to the invasion of putrid emotions, the pain came back.

He stood from his chair and screamed.

He screamed from the top of his lungs and screamed louder than when he did so when he first awoke. He screamed in pain, he screamed in agony and despair.

He felt as if the world was bearing down upon him, his mind consumed by a black hole of emotions that s.u.c.k.e.d up whatever he felt into this vacuum that would soon explode in a splendid and joyous spectacle of madness and insanity.

The emotions he suppressed finally took over him after a decade of suppression.

He screamed and fell backward against the floor but still, he continued to writhe and whimper. He curled into a ball with his hands bashing his head as if the pain within wasn't already enough. He then stood and bashed his head against the glass table that shattered into thousands of pieces and shards before he proceeded to grab his chair and flung it against the glass walls behind him. The chair bounced on the surface of the glass wall because it was too strong for a mere chair to shatter.

He continued on screaming and he continued to thrash his room. Minutes passed and he thrashed his room further and further, nobody outside noticed, not even the drones that were standing outside of his door felt the commotion nor heard the chaos that was happening inside.

Won't they sense One's distress since he was connected to the network?

Yes, they would, but he was no longer connected.

It won't take long for his puppets to notice the absence of his signals and psychic presence but the time it would take would be enough for him to completely collapse and subsequently die due to the immense stress.

A few minutes of thrashing passed and One fell once again against the floor and lost consciousness, he finally lost a battle against himself and the world froze around him.

If he had tear buds, he would be bawling his eyes right now, thankfully he did not or else he would look a lot worse than he currently is.

Sadness

Anger

Regret

A sense of loss

Why does he feel this way?

Why does he need to experience such pain?

Isn't it enough that he was alone?

Surrounded by machines.

Confronted by people he doesn't even know.

Confronted by a concept that not even he could properly understand without abandoning the very principles he used to get to where he was.

And most of all, wasn't it enough that he awoke in a world where he was the only one left? Where loneliness was his reality and the social requirement for him to keep his sanity absent?

There are humans in the new world, yes he gets it.

But he does not view them as humans from Earth.

Why?

He asked himself.

Why can't I?!

He asked again and again.

But nobody will give him this answer, as he lied on the floor and the pain slowly faded, the very same voice that lured him to follow what it wished suddenly sounded and resonated in his mind.

"Rebuild.."

The voice said.

"Rebuild the world.. Bring back humanity.. Form your Utopia,"

With the addition of the last part, the voice was telling him the same thing it did when he first awake, but now, he talked back.

"Why should!?"

He screamed in anger and confusion, in the dark void of his mind in which he screamed, he received no answer.

He screamed again but louder.

"Why!? Why!? Why should I!?"

"There is nothing for me to gain!? Rebuild!? Bullshit, everything is bullshit!"

"I slaughter people!"

"I slaughter other humans and you want me to bring humans back to Earth!?"

"Why can't I remember!?"

"Why should I be burdened with something I don't completely understand!? Why should I be burdened with something I never asked for!?"

"Tell me!"

"Tell me!!"

"Tell me!!!"

He then stopped and took a breather in his mind.

As expected, although his screams and questions echoed through the dark void, nobody seemed to listen, or if there was somebody listening, that somebody does not want to reply.

A bout of Melancholy.

A bout of Anger.

The fragile ego of someone who placed a facade to fool those he thinks would not notice and so far, his facade held up for the most part.

His machines won't care.

Hailey would probably shrug it off.

That's what he thought, at least.

But he refused to be silent, even in this seemingly hopeless situation, he continued to voice his frustrations and stress.

Back in the real world, he still lied on the floor surrounded by a cascade of destruction. His eyes still opened wide and the bluish hue on them absent. In what should be an organized room of monitors, holograms and maps, it now reflected the madness of the one who uses it.

His thoughts floated around the void of his mind. The pain ceded from his head and the emotions that drowned him finally began to disperse.

As a human, his purpose was something he does not like, does not want nor does he need but he is forced to do so. He wanted to refuse and he did whatever he could to do so but he could not achieve it. He mindlessly followed the voice that told him to do this and that without a second thought and only now does he again realize the folly.

"Tsk,"

One calmed down, his mind finally at ease after minutes of agony and torture. In the void of his mind, he manifested into his figure, a humanoid thought that wandered aimlessly through the void. He floated and floated and realized that through this entire expanse of nothingness, below him was a pit that was deep, and he could see a faint white speck of light that served as the only light source.

"Maybe, that's me,"

He thought.

"Maybe, just maybe, if I tried to dive there, I'll discover the truth of it all, the answers to my questions, the solution to this problem I cannot solve through conventional ways,"

He again thought.

He suddenly felt something solid beneath his feet. He looked down and wondered before suddenly stepping on the solid slate.

"Hm?"

He whispered. He was somewhat calm, he did not understand what he was feeling right now but he did not want to add more questions that he knew he won't get the answer to, besides, he was inside his own mind, his psychic dimension, nothing in here makes much sense.

"What a waste of time,"

He said as he contemplated his decisions.

"Not quite,"

Someone replied.