Tales From the Terran Republic

Craxina stood there holding Dave's hand as they both looked at Ploxni's motionless body hooked up to a bunch of machines.

"I kinda knew that Sheloran was bad news," Dave said quietly, "But I had no idea."

"Me neither," Craxina said with a little sigh. "I knew something was 'up' with her, but I…."

She looked down.

"At least we are safe," Craxina said quietly. "She sacrificed herself for us."

"Yeah, for now," Dave replied. "But that was just the Free Port. Those assholes are everywhere. It's only a matter of time before they come back."

"Yeah..." Craxina said at a loss. "I don't know what we are going to do. I… I have a bit of money saved up. Sheloran didn't want me to pay anything, not even for the hotel. I guess I could go home…."

"And you don't have to worry about Ploxni," Dave said with a little sigh. "I'm going to ask her to marry me if she… If she ever..."

Dave started to sob.

"Really?!?" Craxina said happily, "She will be so happy! She really loves you, you know!"

"I shoulda done it sooner!" Dave wailed. "Why didn't I?"

"Well, you're gonna do it now!" Craxina exclaimed, jumping up and giving him a hug. "That's what's important, what we do now! I'm going to feel a lot better knowing that Ploxni is going to be safe!"

Craxina's phone rang. It was the police.

After she hung up, she sighed sadly.

"They say that they're done with the Drop," she said, her lip quivering. "I guess I should go down there and see if there's anything left."

"Don't go alone!" Dave said urgently. "We still don't know if there are any of them left!"

Ohmyempress! Craxina thought. He's right!

She took a deep breath.

"Someone should go down there," she said. "I owe it to Sheloran. Maybe there's… I don't know… something. I'll call a couple of the girls, maybe someone from the union?"

"I'll come!" Dave said as he tried to sit up.

"Dave, you can barely walk!" Craxina said, giving him a kiss on the nose. "You stay here with Ploxni. If she wakes up, she is going to need to know what's going on."

"Ok," Dave said, easing back into the bed.

***

A couple of hours later, Craxina and a motley assortment of xenos wandered through the wreckage of the Drop of Oil.

There was nothing left! It had been completely gutted.

Craxina tried to fight back tears… and failed.

She stood there sobbing as her friends, many of them weeping themselves, tried to comfort her (and each other).

"I can't believe it's gone," Xv'gle said, her body shuddering. "It's… gone..."

"What are we going to do?" Korka said, her ears drooping.

"I don't know," Craxina said, looking down. "You… you all have union cards," she said. "You can get work anywhere."

"Yeah?" Lolipurr asked, wiping her eyes, "Where?"

"You just log on to the directory and-"

"You ever tried that, Craxi?" Kuuuuu snapped, whipping her eyestalks at her, flinging stress mucus everywhere, "No. You haven't! You always had it good here!"

"What… what do you mean?" Craxi asked.

"Oh, I'm sorry, we're full," Kuuuuu said in a mocking tone, "Or, 'I guess we have to let you in, huh' and then they hide you in the back and don't send you anybody."

"Or they just call you a freak and are really, really mean!" Littlefoot said, looking down with big sad eyes. "The other girls even will gang up on you and say really really mean things!" she exclaimed. "This… this was the only place in town… and the next one too!"

"I… I had no idea..." Craxina said with a shocked expression. "Sheloran always said-"

"Sheloran didn't know everything!" Lolipurr exclaimed. "She was too nice and believed their bullshit. She was always too nice… Until she wasn't… I guess..."

"Why didn't you tell us?" Craxina asked.

"And have Sheloran go up there and cause trouble because you know she would! We didn't want to risk a good thing!"

Lolipurr's phone rang.

"Hi Beth," she said anxiously. "I'm just over at the Drop of Oil with some of the other girls I-"

Lolipurr winced.

"I'm sorry!" she whined. "I just wanted to tell everybody bye. I'll be back in just a little bit! No! Please don't take my tips! I'll make it up! I'll-"

She just sighed and put the phone back in her little purse.

"Beth?!?" Craxina exclaimed. "She's awful!"

"What else am I gonna do?" Lolipurr asked. "It's better than the street, and she isn't so bad."

"Are you kidding?!? She steals from you and slaps you around and-"

"At least she doesn't try to take 'freebies' or make me give them to their friends!" Lolipurr said defensively. "And she says that she will take in anybody for her (ugh) 'petting zoo'… I… I gotta go..." she said, looking down. "It… It was really nice while it lasted… I liked it here a lot… Take care of yourself, Craxi."

Looking downward, Lolipurr started to walk away.

Some of the other girls started to follow her.

"No!" Craxina shouted.

They stopped and looked back.

"I'm not letting this happen!" she squeaked. "You are NOT going back there! We… We are gonna stay in business!"

"How?" Huuuuu asked. "Look at this place! It's… It's over, Craxi."

"It's not over until we say it's over!" Craxi shouted. "Yeah, they burned down the building, but we are the business! As long as we stick together, we can keep fucking!… Our way!!!"

"But where are we going to do it?"

"Right here!" Craxina squeaked. "The building is condemned, but they didn't say SHIT about the parking lot! So we fuck in the parking lot!"

"I'm pretty sure that's illegal, Craxi," Xv'gle said.

"… The Rutmoon!" Craxi exclaimed excitedly. "Every year, we throw this huge festival where we all make these cute masks, and everybody pretends we don't know each other and just go nuts! We set up these big TENTS! We use tents! Look! Everybody can get a tent, and we can set up a desk and a transactor, and we can keep on fucking!"

Everybody looked at Craxi with a stunned expression.

"I got some cash. I'll grab some tents, and some mattresses, and those cute little cushions… It will be fun! What do you say?"

"It sounds a lot better than Beth," Lolipurr said, grooming her fur.

"Goddamn right it does!" Craxina shouted. "Anybody who wants to keep working here can!"

"I'll order some pizza!" Huuuu exclaimed happily.

"I live in a van!" Littlefoot said happily. (her actual name is unpronounceable) "Can I just park it here?"

"Sure!" Craxina exclaimed. "And I'll rent some porta-potties!"

"You guys are insane!" Pkshklla exclaimed, her compound eyes gleaming. "I'm in!"

"But what if we run into trouble," Lolipurr asked. "I know Beth is going to be a hassle. And you know the Harkeen are pissed..."

Everybody fell silent.

Craxina closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Well, if they are going to shut us down, then they will have to shut us down! I'm not doing it for them! I'm… I'm gonna buy a gun."

"Me too," Littlefoot said with a nervous squeak.

"Yeah, fuck them." Lolipurr squeaksnarled. "I'm not going back to people like Beth!"

"And I'll call the Union!" Craxina squeaked. "I'll see what they will do for us. Everybody come back tomorrow, and I'll have the tents! Tell the others!"

Everybody hugged and scampered off.

***

"What do you mean you won't help us?!?" Craxina squealed.

"I'm sorry," a stern-faced grey-haired woman replied. "Look, we both know that a hell of a lot more than the sex trade was going on in there. The Harkeen didn't torch the place over prostitution, did they?"

"But that has nothing to do with us!!! We just want to work!"

"You have cards," the woman replied. "There are thousands of licensed brothels in this country alone."

"And none of them will take us!" Craxina yelped.

"I'm certain you are exaggerating."

"I've talked to my girls!" Craxina shouted. "They've tried!"

"I'm sorry, Craxina," the woman said. "You and Sheloran aren't the first who have tried to use a union shop as a front. We can't allow ourselves to get involved in this sort of thing. We have a responsibility for the safety of all of our members, and we can't get drawn into a gang war."

"The coffee shop was the front!" Craxina squeaked. "Sheloran didn't even have anything to do with the girls! I managed them!"

The woman just sighed and turned her monitor so Craxina could see it.

"It says here that Sheloran was the procurer and manager of the establishment."

"Yeah, but I actually-"

"I'm sorry."

"You have to help! Bad people are already trying to-"

"I said that I'm sorry and that I cannot help you." the woman replied.

"You don't care! You just want us gone!" Craxina snarled (unfortunately, it was more cute than menacing)

"You were the one who ran other enterprises, and you were the one who ran afoul of the Harkeen because of it, and it was your manager who decided to take matters into her own hands and further make an enemy of the Harkeen. It sounds to me like I'm not the one who has no concern for their girls," the woman replied coolly. "Good day."

"Oh, go and sit on a fat one!" Craxina snapped as she threw her union card at the woman and stomped out.

As the door slammed, shut the old woman sneered.

"Freak."

***

"Well, technically, you don't have to be a member of the sex workers union to operate," Baxlon said to Craxina as he handed her a tissue. "But it does make things a lot easier."

"If they won't help us, fuck them!" Craxina squeaked angrily. "She just sat there and… and… I could feel her eyes all over me. They don't want us!"

"Ok," Baxlon said, blowing a lazy stream of bubbles. "I can't say you and Sheloran are boring, that's for sure. I'll write up the necessary documents. Don't have your girls burn their union cards just yet, though. Give me a week to get all of this filed."

"Ok," Craxina replied.

"But I need to advise you, not just as your attorney but Baxlon to Craxina. You girls arming yourselves is pretty fucking risky. You've already seen what's happened. There's no guarantee it's going to stop."

"The Drop of Oil is all those girls have, Baxlon," Craxina said as she looked at the floor. "If we go under, they have nowhere else to go… well nowhere good to go."

“Sheloran is dead, long live Sheloran,” Baxlon murmured.

"Sheloran is dead?!?!?" Craxina squealed in terror and dismay.

"No… No… it's a human figure of speech. It just means… never mind. Poor choice of words," Baxlon replied, trying not to laugh. "You need real security 24/7 if you are going to do this unless you and your little friends have been training as a militia on the side… You haven't been doing that, right?"

Craxina shook her head.

"After everything, I had to ask," Baxlon chuckled. "Ok, I will see what I can do, but you have a real problem. Most of the Drop's assets are tied up in funding for the loans, and diverting it into operating expenses is a bit… dodgy… which I am not opposed to in principle but fucking around my bankers isn't smart for any of us. The insurance has a clause for just this sort of thing, but they are dragging their feet. They will cough up the cash, but it's going to take a few days at least. I can get some contractors, but they will want cash up front until you can show some positive cash flow from your little tent revival."

"I just need it so we can work," Craxina said as she set her little jaw, "We can work out the rest later."

"Well, you can work. So that won't be a problem, but, Craxina, are you sure about this?"

"The girls need us, Baxlon."

"Christ, you even sound like her," Baxlon said as he turned and opened a small safe.

He pulled out a small blaster.

"Here," he said. "It's a burner, no Republic records. It's legal enough if you are defending yourself and if you are… well… Let's just say that if you toss it into an incinerator, nobody will be the wiser."

Craxina took the blaster, holding it awkwardly.

"Jesus," Baxlon said, rolling his eyes. "Take it to a range or something."

"Don't tell Sheloran," Craxina said. "She will worry, and you know how she gets when she worries… especially these days..."

"As the business owner and my client, I am obligated to inform her of what's happening with her business, Craxina," Baxlon said, "I can't do that."

“Pleeeeeeaseeee!”

“Noooooooooo.”

Craxina pouted.

"If she pulls the plug, that's it," Baxlon said. "I have power of attorney and can authorize a lot, but she still calls the shots… and I don't want to face her when she gets out if someone gets hurt. She kind of scares me."

"Well, be sure she knows about why I'm doing this!"

"I will. Now go to the range and learn how to use that thing for fuck's sake!"

Craxina wandered out of his office, still cradling the blaster as if it was a baby.

Baxlon just shook his head. This could be bad. However, they had some time before the Harkeen catches their breath and the neighborhood cools off enough for them to risk coming back. If she can just get some cash flow, he could get them at least one person worth a fuck.

He floated to the bottom of his globe as he wondered, Is there someone who they can pay with blowjobs?

Craxina spent the rest of her crazy day running from shop to shop, buying all the tents, mattresses, pillows, blankets, and whatever else she could think of.

Her own money was fading fast, but she didn't care. She had hoped that there would have been more of the business's funds available, but it turns out that the whole thing was sort of a house of cards, and with the main assets gone and the insurance dragging its feet and blah blah blah things were barely holding together. There was money, but the money was needed to cover the debts and payments and blah blah blah.

Whatever. She had enough cash to keep things rolling for a bit.

Oh shit, literally! Porta-potties! How the hell do you get porta-potties? She started to call Baxlon again and stopped. If he thought she didn't even know how to get a fucking shitter, he would pull the plug for sure. She only just barely got him to go along with this.

It turns out that it wasn't hard. People could now take a leak or go number two! Mission accomplished.

She had everything set to be delivered to the parking lot first thing in the morning.

Exhausted, she went to the hotel…

Alone...

Completely alone...

She pulled out the uncomfortable blaster and tossed it on the nightstand…

Just like Sheloran did...

What am I thinking? she thought helplessly. I'm not Sheloran!… I'm not!… I'm just… just...

She started to cry as she dropped to her knees (all of them) and buried her face in her little paws.

She hadn't been alone in forever… She needed a friendly face.

Using some of the last of her money, she accessed a hyperspace link.

***

Grwwlf was sitting in his living room watching his favorite porn-comedy serial, the Fluffkitts, while he munched on some fried krispits.

His phone rang.

It was Craxina! He hadn't heard from her in over a month!

"Hey, sis!" he exclaimed. "Fuck the galaxy yet… Craxina?" he asked as he saw her tear-matted face.

Instead of words, Craxina just let out a long agonized howl.

"Awooooooooooo," she cried, "Awooooooooo..."

Grwwlf's eyes suddenly went wild.

"Awoooooooooo!" he howled, instincts taking over, "Awooooooooo!"

"Awoooooooo!" was howled in reply from upstairs as his boyfriend hurled himself down the stairs, "Awoooooooooo!"

"Awooooooo!" echoed from the kitchen, along with the crashing of crockery, as his other boyfriend and his girlfriend both sprinted in howling.

Across the street, his neighbor, a portly and scruffy fellow, was sipping a beer and watching his favorite sport, synchronized ice-fucking.

"Awooooooo!" drifted in through an open window.

His ears pricked up.

"Awoooooooo!" he howled as he tore out of the front door at a sprint.

Upstairs his daughter and her boyfriend both froze, mid fuck.

"Awooooooo!" the boyfriend howled as he threw himself, completely naked, out of the second-story window and landed on the lawn, nearly flattening his girlfriend's dad. He left a muddy tear in the lovingly tended yard as he kicked up grass as he took off at a sprint.

"Awoooooo!" the girlfriend howled as she hurled herself down the stairs, bouncing off of the wall. "Awoooooooo!"

"Awooooooo!" echoed across the neighborhood as people sprinted out of their houses, some grabbing weapons, others grabbing med-kits, but most just running in a blind rush of instinct.

"Awoooooooooooo!"

"Awoooooooooo!" Craxina continued to howl, completely lost and alone.

"Awooo.. awoo…. Empress's panties stop!" her brother begged.

"Awoooooo!" Craxina howled.

Her brother's eyes once again became wild.

"Awoooooo!" he howled as his door burst open and the entire neighborhood tried to crowd into the living room, all howling at the top of their heads.

Eventually, Craxina stopped, and the chaos eventually died down, everyone gasping for breath.

"Craxina!" Her brother exclaimed. "What's happened?"

"Oh, it's horrible…." Craxina sobbed.

A few moments later, her brother's overcrowded little house was filled with yips and little snarls.

"Those… meanies!" her brother yelled. "Don't worry, Craxina! We're coming!"

He threw back his head and howled, "Awoooooooooooooo!"

" Awooooooooooooo!" the neighborhood howled in reply.

After Craxina hung up. He turned to the crowd.

"We need a ship!"

"My uncle!" someone shouted as he reached for his phone only to realize that he was stark naked. "Hang on! I'll be right back!" he yelled as he sprinted out of the door.

Everyone started making plans and splitting up.

After everyone left, Grwwlf collapsed into the arms of his paramours.

His girlfriend ran upstairs and started to drag down a huge box. They ripped it open, and various leather garments spilled out.

Grwwlf selected a black leather collar studded with shiny spikes and put it on.

"Awoo," he said grimly.

"Ooh! So manly!" one of his boyfriends giggled and licked his nose.