The Bad Ending of an Otome

It seems that I was more weary than I expected. After showering and changing into a robe, I returned to my room and was about to rest my eyes when Kitty gently shook my shoulder to wake me up. I must have been sleeping peacefully since the outside, which had been light only moments before, had grown black.

With a bewildered appearance, I just managed to wash my face and change into fresh clothes with Kitty’s assistance. I’m not sure how they knew my size, but the dressing room was loaded with outfits that seemed to fit my body type perfectly. Given the late afternoon time and the inside feast, I opted against using too many bright colors and decorations.

An orange outfit with a clear crystal on the breast caught my eye. While it wasn’t as bright as a diamond, the way it sparkled in the same hue as the dress in the light was stunning. With a huge smile on her face, Kitty agreed with my choice.

Kitty assisted me with tying a ribbon of the same color in my hair, applying light makeup, and adding modest earrings. We had been working for quite some time by the time we finished. I couldn’t afford to be any later than the host, so I dashed to the dining room.

The dining room was well-lit. I expected it to be like my room, which wasn’t showy but had an understated elegant vibe, but the chandelier studded with a plethora of crystals and the platinum candle holders were reflecting the light, nearly blinding me.

The Windrose family was no less distinguished as the Brahamdorff family, but owing to their ailing daughter, the interior of their home was warm and less opulent rather than pretentious.

Visitors to the Marquis’s house were also aware of the tragedy of the ailing only daughter, thus such elaborate meals were rarely held. As a result, such a formal situation was foreign to me. Furthermore, I had been operating as a commoner for about two years and had forgotten about this type of light. It hit me as I looked down at the clean white tablecloth and gleaming cutlery. This was the world I’d be living in for the next six months at the very least. A cold world filled with exhaustingly lovely décor, booze, and pretense.

“Aunt.”

Cassio Brahamdorff reached out his hand to shake mine. I quickly placed my palm on his, seeking to conceal the fact that I had been lost in contemplation for a moment. He was dressed well, as he always was. His crisp, sky-blue suit emphasized his straight lines, and sapphire cufflinks glistened on his wrists.

As I approached Lady McGinty, who was already sitting at the table, I held my breath slightly.

“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, Miss Emilia.”

She resembled the appearance I’d heard about from tales. Her half-silver hair was neatly coiffed, with not a single strand out of place, and the purple velvet that wrapped over her tall shoulders and waist felt exquisite, despite her age. An old-fashioned cameo brooch on her chest caught my attention. I felt like a rookie student standing in front of a test tube when I saw her keen grey eyes, like those of a hawk. Cassio took me to the left side of the unoccupied table. There were already empty dishes and utensils on the table. Cassio took the seat across from me.

“I’ve heard a lot about you from my ill-mannered nephew.”

“Thank you very much for inviting me.”

“I’ve heard quite a lot.” I worked hard to conceal my uneasiness. I had no clue what type of things he had spun about me. Lady Mcginty was, to be honest, difficult. I had rarely met with ladies her age before, and even the decorum I was supposed to have around them was hazy. My function at the Marquis’s residence was to be Ophelia’s discussion companion and playmate, not to nurture the sophistication of a young noble lady.

Of all, even if her health was in jeopardy, Ophelia was still the Marquis’s only daughter. So a minimum of manners and culture were expected, and a tutor would pay visits on occasion. While I had studied alongside her during those times, I questioned how much it would assist when dealing with a woman like Lady McGinty, who had so much high society experience. Furthermore, Cassio Brahamdorff was undeniably one of the most popular persons in society at the time.

It would also be impossible to conceal my background from the individual who would become my chaperone. I came to the Marquis’s house as a kid to be Ophelia’s companion, then departed after her death to labor among the ordinary people. How much of this would she be aware of?

“I’ve already heard the story about my nephew having an unplanned tantrum.”

I paused in the middle of a drink of soup, which had peeled shrimp and clams. Cassio stepped in with a sharp remark.

“A temper tantrum? Aunt… How long will you treat me like a three-year-old?”

“Does a debutante ball seem as simple as taking a three-year-old on a picnic? Do you believe the Brahamdorff family, who have no regrets about their money, can likewise purchase time?”

“We may not be able to buy time, but we certainly can condense it.”

Lady McGinty’s tongue clicked.

“Such an ignorant man parading around society as a gentleman, it’s a pity for the ladies who don’t know any better.”

“Aunt, as always, I respect your unfiltered words, but do you not care about my dignity in front of a guest?”

The man’s smile, as if he were playing coy, seemed strange. I set aside any desire to intervene and concentrated on the fresh meal delivered by the server. It was steak on young calf flesh with a red wine sauce. I was trying not to make any noise while chewing the meat when I saw a peculiar stare. Lady McGinty and Cassio Brahamdorff were both staring at me as I turned my head. I hastily swallowed what I had been eating, a little agitated.

“…Do you have something to say?”

“There are many unfortunate girls who are blinded by my ill-mannered nephew and end up being both externally and internally wounded, but fortunately, you, Miss Emilia, seem to be a sensible lady.”

Lady McGinty’s tone seemed strange. I wasn’t sure if she was attempting to anger Cassio or provoke me. But it seemed hopeless to properly hide my inner sentiments from such a seasoned lady and mimic a girl who admired ‘Mr. Cassio’. I had no intention of doing so in the first place. I responded calmly.

“Thank you very much for the compliment.”

“Aunt?”

“Yes, and how is the food?”

“I’m not eloquent, so it’s hard to express, but it’s very delicious.”

“Yes, eat a lot. The chef here is excellent.”

“Aunt? Um, you know, I’m here.”

“If what’s attached to your face is a mouth, not a beak, why are you quacking like a duck?”

Right. The expression ‘if someone can bribe my aunt, I want to meet them’ was not a joke. Lady McGinty’s remarks were magnificent. It was unusual to come across someone who could push Cassio Brahamdorff to this degree. I did not object and sliced into the duck pie that Lady McGinty pointed to. My mouth was flooded with wonderful flavor when I chewed the crispy duck skin. Cassio Brahamdorff, who was dining with Lady McGinty and me, had a strangely dissatisfied expression on his face.

“Aunt, it’s terrible when you speak to your exceptional nephew in that manner. It may be humiliating for me to say so, but it’s not surprising that the ladies of the social world like me, is it?”

I stuck a fork into my salad instead of staring at the arrogant man who was congratulating himself. Lady McGinty clicked her tongue once more.

“There’s nothing more dangerous than a deep affection for which you can’t accept responsibility, but this guy doesn’t seem to realize it, always blabbering away.”

The chicory I was eating became bitter. I sipped some water to rinse my mouth. Cassio Brahamdorff fixed me with an incomprehensible stare.

“If you treat people’s hearts lightly, as if you were playing with fire, you should be aware that you may be swept away by that fire.”

I stared at the ocean glistening behind the clear glass. The low candlelight mirrored my face. My glammed-up and ornamented look seemed odd. Just yesterday, I was a weary sheep, a figure no one would notice if they brushed past me on the street. My brown hair was organically groomed and swept down past my collarbone.

My cheeks felt weird with the naturally flushed crimson hue put to them. It felt like it had been touched by fire. Fire. Was that the original fate assigned to ‘Emilia’? To be a moth or a mayfly that burns to death.

A destiny of tripping over my own feet while attempting to obtain what I cannot own or achieve what I cannot overcome. Emilia was envious of Ophelia in the game and had feelings for Raretis, Cassio, and Edward. If I recall properly, she was particularly infatuated with Raretis. As a result, I was concerned. I was concerned that my current sensations were part of someone else’s screenplay, that my emotions were not my own. So I considered quitting.

Because Ophelia had a good relationship with Raretis it was just them two. I felt envious of her. Even after death, I couldn’t totally eliminate my envy. It was merely that her presence had taken precedence over my petty selfishness. It wasn’t like when we were kids, fighting and shouting at each other about why we should live so badly if we were going to die anyhow.

So I considered severing it before my emotions engulfed me and shattered even my determination. That’s why I told Ophelia I’d die beside her. I wanted to get it over with as soon as possible. I wanted to reach a point where I could accept myself. I wasn’t really hoping for a happy ending because it wasn’t in the game.

I really didn’t want to be miserable like the girl in the horrible ending I’d watched before. I was such a spoiled brat. I lacked any guts. While I felt I loved her and was willing to die in her place, I was a coward who thought that if I terminated it with her death as an explanation, I would no longer have to worry.

Cassio Brahamdorff and I exchanged glances. I lowered my fork gradually. My stomach was heaving. Lady McGinty spoke with authority.

“Do you get it, Cassio? You are overly dismissive of people’s feelings. Whether the shell seems light or heavy to you, whether a person’s humanity is nice or terrible, nothing is as uncontrolled as human emotions. Do you believe the weight you’ll confront in life will be so light since the world appears light to you and you live recklessly?”

I popped the sugared walnut treat that had fallen into my mouth. Finally, something light and heavy touched and then barely broke. I chewed it vigorously. It was as complicated as the weight of profound thinking. Cassio’s cheerful expression faded. Except for Ophelia, he had treated everyone as lightly as ants drawn by sweets. Eyes as cold and solid as an age-old rock looked at me from under the golden hair that shimmered like a gold thread in the sun.

“…I’ll remember that.”

I was taken aback by his unusually serious response, which I expected him to laugh off. Lady McGinty raised her slender gray eyes as well.

“What’s the matter with you? Didn’t you say you’re still a kid who can’t tell the difference between heaven and earth?”

“Wouldn’t you chastise me several times, saying it’s a good excuse if I responded like that? We shouldn’t make the location unpleasant, even if we don’t have time to eat with them.”

Was it a miscommunication? The man laughed, as if it had never occurred before. Lady McGinty rolled her eyes, as if dissatisfied.

“Tsk, you’re not even capable of speaking.”

“I’m always grateful for your compliments.”

“Enough of that. I, too, do not wish to fight in front of the visitors.”

Lady McGinty accepted the servant’s offer of wine. A glass of wine was also placed in front of Cassio and myself. When the clever servers realized the dinner was nearly finished, they collected the empty plates and delivered dishes with bite-sized sweets and fruits. It appeared to be a nibble for the drink rather than a dessert. Lady McGinty gracefully raised her glass.

“Anyway, Miss Emilia.”

I, too, raised my glass to the sky. In midair, the brilliant crimson liquid glistened like a ruby.

“Greetings and welcome to the mansion. I hope you have a pleasant and worry-free visit.”

“Thank you.”

“We can discuss this further tomorrow. There will be open discussions that can only take place in the absence of my rambunctious nephew.”

“Not at all, aunt. Have I done anything to irritate you?”

Cassio Brahamdorff expressed innocent contrition, as if he had been wrongfully accused.

“You must be a fool if you truly don’t know, and what kind of fox could compare if you pretend to be innocent while knowing?”

The Countess’ comments had a bite to them, as if she was saying, ‘don’t you think I know whether you’re an idiot or a shrewd man?’ I couldn’t help but smile as I watched the show. The man’s eyes briefly fell on my face before vanishing. With a puzzled face, Countess McGinty gazed back and forth between him and me. Cassio and I each took our first drink of wine when the Countess did. The ‘officially invited’ meal had come to an end. When the Countess spoke, I was debating whether to say my goodbyes and leave or to stay for a talk.

“So, Emilia, you must be tired. Get some rest as soon as possible. I need another drink with my rowdy nephew.”

“I appreciate your thoughtfulness. It was a fantastic supper.”

Before leaving the dining room, I took the hem of my dress and made a little bow. Kitty, who had been waiting outside, raced to my side. Her joy when she inquired how it went, and her trailing behind me, reminded me of a dog coming to see its owner, and I grinned unconsciously. It was a calm night, like if a cyclone had just gone through.