The Emperor Who Loves Me Dearly

He pushed her into the tiled wall, her b.a.r.e back lay cold as it touches the tiles. Her breathing heavy and hot.

Astrid can also feel his rugged breathing as they stare at each other's eyes. She's drowning in those dark orbs of his, it's like the black hole of the galaxy, s.u.c.k.i.n.g her whole self.

"Take me," she said, their bodies sliding over each other. His warm hands went up to her h.i.p.s.

"I can f*ck you without having feelings for you," he whispered, looking intently at her ocean blue eyes.

"I can never love you"

He removes his hands and slowly turns his back into her.

Her heart was crushed into a million pieces, it's not because she is ugly, it's simply because he doesn't love her, he can't and will never will.

'Love Logan? When did you learn the meaning of love?' she asked herself although she knew the answer.

It would've been better in the past, Logan didn't know what love is, but now? How cruel it is to not be chosen.

"You deserve better," he said before finally closing the door.

"But you are the best..." she meekly said with tears gushing out her eyes, it twinkled like the ocean when the sun rises only that, it is because of sadness.

Her old self flashbacks, her mother said that she was born to be an empress, it was prophesized upon her birth, she did become one...but it may not last any longer.

*Flashback*

"L-l-look Logainn!"

The little girl with blue eyes came running to the charming little boy under the tree, she trips down, her eyes starting to water.

"L-Logaiin" she sniffs.

"It's Logan" the boy sighed as he closed his book and gets up to help the young kid.

"Lowgan, look! A flower" she said trying to correct the pronunciation but failed. She opened her hands, giving him a pink flower.

"It's hydrangea," the boy said, accepting the flowers. The girl nodded enthusiastically.

"It's hard to s-say but my mother said that it means love, weddings, and marriage...can you love me? and marry me when we're older? Puh-leaseee?" her squeaky voice asked, excited for the response of the handsome kid.

"I don't know what love is but marriage? Sure," he said without a care, he really doesn't want the girl to cry, his ears get hurt.

"Astrid come here, don't bother his highness anymore," the duchess of Luniel Kingdom said, her mother.

She glanced at him one more time before waving goodbye.

Every day she's drawing them together, her picture with Logan and at the bottom is written, "Logan Love Astrid"

She cannot wait for the day she will become Mrs. Fergus.

*End of flashback*

Until now, the portrait of their wedding was painted by her carefully, she even adjusted some parts of it, making Logan seem happier than neutral.

As she was left in the cold room, hugging her self, all she can feel is pity for her past self.

"He will not love you...don't chase him any further" was what she wanted to say at the little girl.

She's pretty, many boys chased her and at some point, she even thought Grayson has feelings for her but she can't control the one thing that dictates her actions, her heart.

Maybe if only she did not leave him before to get her sickness treated, his heart would have been hers.

Maybe if she's strong enough physically he will love her.

And maybe just maybe, if Celestia didn't come, she will be the one to make Logan realized what love is.

She soaked her body in the water, staying there for an hour or two, contemplating about her life, she can't let her mother know about this mess in her marriage life.

As she puts on her red robe, she dialed her number one caller.

"B-Brielle?" she sniffs as she called her best friend, Jade Brielle Reagan, the worst b*tch in the whole empire, has a gang of her own and even one of the leaders of the underground world.

"Astrid? Why did you call? Did someone bully you?!" her friend asked, Brielle knew Astrid, too soft to revenge.

"I-I-Logan" she stuttered, her eyes are now red from too much crying yet no one even cares.

She told her all what happened and from the other line, she can hear Brielle cursed. She has no one to talk with, if her mother found out about her situation, she might disown her, after all, her mother cares in power more than anything.

"I've got a plan," her friend said, her voice still angry.

Astrid did not like it, sure she wants to ruin their relationship but not in this way, in a dangerous and vile way.

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