The Fake Saint Decided to be Real

Astein pulled me lightly. It was so easy for me to get on the horse when I took the front seat of Astein.

“Th, thank you.”

I was so nervous because it was my first time riding a horse. I was scared of the high view, and I felt the life under me wriggled. In particular, I felt the breathing of the horse and my heart was beating.

At that moment, I thought I had done something wrong.

“You can just sit comfortably while holding the horse’s mane or my arm.”

If I held the horse’s mane, the guy behind my back wouldn’t feel my heart that beating fast.

Wouldn’t it be so frivolous to see me fluttering like this?

“You’re nervous.”

“It’s my first time riding a horse.”

“I didn’t consider it. Sorry.”

It was good that he thought that I was just being nervous. Thankfully, he was a little far from my body.

The horse’s mane seemed to hurt when I held it, and I had no courage to hold his arm. Eventually, I grabbed the front part of the horse’s saddle.

“We’ll leave.”

I couldn’t tell Astein that I wanted to go to the slums. I was too nervous to do that.

When he reached the saddle, his foot stimulated the horse. Then, the horse slowly moved forward. My body was hardened by the movement.

“If you are so nervous, you will have a hard time.”

“Yes? Yes… But I think I’m going to fall….”

Was it too much?

I got on the horse because of my desire, but I and Astein remained far away without touched each other.

“It’s comfortable if you lean on me.”

Suddenly, Astein’s words made my heart pounded more.

“Lean on my chest. If you are so tense, you will suffer from muscular pain tomorrow.”

But I couldn’t lean on him. I felt like people around me were watching. I was afraid that a strange scandal would occur. I grew up hearing that I shouldn’t do it all my life, so I was afraid of people’s eyes.

“Ha…”

Then I could hear a small sigh. I felt stuffy. Then, the horse became faster, and off the street.

“Where are we going?”

Because I believed in Astein, I didn’t think that he had a bad intention. I was just wondering why he was doing this out of the blue. However, he didn’t answer me and kept silent.

After a while, we were in the woods of light purple forest full of lilac scent resembled him.

“This place…”

“I actually saw you in the temple.”

“…”

“I’ve been feeling it since then, but I was worried about the shade on your face.”

I almost cried at the remark. He used to always carefully checked my condition before he left me.

On my father’s last day, he recognized my face which looked like a ghost and brought me a warm, sweet milk tea. He always suggested walking, looking at flowers, if I looked a little stretched.

I never asked why. Just as he was then, he gave me time to organize my thoughts and waited.

“Thank you.”

I got off the horse for a while. I closed my eyes for a long time and was drunk with lilac scent. It was sweet, but it smelled good and refreshing at the end. Enough to put down my heavy heart for a while.

Maybe it was a familiar moment. The warm feeling that warmly wrapped me in the depths of memory. It bloomed in my heart and gave me a little courage.

“I think I can go back now.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, my thoughts are perfectly arranged now.”

I was lucky to have a better idea despite my narrow movements.

When I carefully looked at him, he smiled sweetly.

“That’s a relief.”

When I started moving again on horseback, my posture changed a little more naturally. Slightly leaned on Astein.

Suddenly, even in my past and present life, I thought that there was only one person I depended on most. The one that held me back right now, the only one.

So I was able to take what I thought out of me mouth.

“Excuse me, Sir Astein?”

Astein was the only one I could ask for anything.

“What happened? Please tell me.”

“I have a favour to ask. Can you find someone?”

“Who is it?”

“…Marquis Futor’s illegitimate child.”

Astein was silent for a moment. It would be outrageous. The woman he first met today and was called a prospective saint, asked him to dig after her father.

“It’s for me and the future and of the temple.”

He was a man who was deeply devoted to become a paladin despite his family opposition. So why not I used the temple as my excuse?

“I really need her. Sir Astein is the only one I can trust and ask….”

I added useless words. Like a fool.

“I heard your conversation with the saint in the temple today. I heard you are going to become a paladin soon. Then, you will work with me…”

I was ashamed to say it again. Without an answer for a long time, he barely answered the question.

“Yes, I understand. Do you have any characteristics or clues?”

“Her name is Ellaner, living in the slums. She has red hair and golden eyes, and she is the same age as me.”

I shared every piece of information I remembered. He should be able to find her soon enough. It was never a common appearance.

“You should find her as soon as possible. After you found her, you must protect her in a place unknown to the temple and my father.”

The easiest way I could do to change the future was to stop Astein from becoming a paladin. I tried to do that only when I saw him.

But now that I was here with him, I couldn’t bring the word out. If he gave up being a paladin, his connection with me would disappear.

I knew it’s greedy, but I still wanted to stay by his side for a few days. Even by holding on to the names of a saint and a paladin.

So I chose a different path. In order to get him to walk on the way he wanted, I shouldn’t be an obstacle to him.

Ellaner could just go through the verification of the saint. Inevitably, even if I became the fake saint, I was going to find Ellaner. Before the Marquis brought back the tragedy of that time.

“Is it possible?”

“It’s possible for me to find her as soon as possible. The problem is protection. I don’t know if she will trust me to protect her.”

I narrowed my maze a little. Would Ellaner, who had the divine power, calmly stayed with Astein? Even if it was for protection, it was difficult to escape or hide without believing.

“I’m sorry, I will change my request. Once you know her location secretly, please let me meet you unconditionally.”

Even though she was my enemy, she was the saint, a symbol of goodness. I would never turn away from my suffering. I was even going to return my place to the beginning and ask for the guilt of the Marquis.

“Then I will convince her.”

“I understand. I’ll follow your word.”

“Thank you. And I’m sorry. I’m not a saint yet, but I asked you to do something already.”

“No. Let me know if you need anything. But what should I do about the interim report? I know it’s not easy to have a personal meeting with Lady Freya. Besides, it’s Marquis Futor, wouldn’t you be caught?”

He called my name. It made my heart jumped again and again. My face turned hot.

“Yes, you must keep it secret. We shouldn’t be caught by anyone.”

My father will be amazed if he found out I was preparing for this. Furthermore, I wasn’t even in a position to meet Astein.

“I am going to the temple every morning to pray. I’ll wait under the lilac tree in the garden. It’s the place where you and the saint met.”

“That’s a good idea.”

I had a reason to go to the temple, which I didn’t want to go to. So I had to endure it. Thanks to him, I dreamed of a faraway future.

Paladins could leave the temple at any time. So as long as I got out of the fate as a fake saint, wouldn’t it be possible for me to make it with Astein?

“Then I will wait for Lady Freya to come under the lilac tree every morning.”

Astein’s sweet voice rang in my ear and my heart almost burst.

I was glad to see the front gate of the Marquis Futor’s mansion. Otherwise, I might have asked Astein to run away. And if he did, he would be persecuted by both the Marquis and the temple.

“I’ll get off here.” I told Astein a little far from the front gate.

It wasn’t good to be noticed by the Marquis and the employees. It didn’t matter if I got into trouble. But I was sure the Marquis would have bothered Astein. Especially if Astein was from a powerless family.

“Please wait a moment.”

Astein got off the horse and reached out to me. I watched him and carefully took his hands. Then, he pulled me with strength. The feeling of falling from the horse wasn’t so good. It’s like the feeling of falling from the cliff.

As if waiting, the horse screamed and raised its front feet slightly. I closed my eyes tightly in fear, and I couldn’t control my body because I thought I was in danger of falling on the ground.

“Lady Freya!”

Again, Astein had managed to get me as safe as he did that day. Even he hit the ground first.

Bad memories flashed through again. He, who was bleeding, protected me, whose arms and legs were only slightly broken.

Even though I promised myself I’d be fine because I was going to get out of my destiny, my body still trembled.

“Are you okay?”

Surprisingly, Astein’s voice calmed me down. My trembling heart calmed again.

I opened my eyes and his face was too close. The distance was about a finger, where I could feel his breath. I was embarrassed and tried to get up.

“Yes, I’m okay. Thank….”

“Freya! What the hell are you doing?!”

I was caught by my fafther, not by anyone else.

“The child who will be a saint is now in a broad daylight with a man who knows nothing about fundamentals!”

I tried to get up as I heard my father’s anger.

Astein wrapped and supported me. He raised me up and turned to my father. With a more businesslike face than when I first met him today.

“Marquis Futor, long time no see.”

I was astonished at his way of speaking. The same with my father. It was my first time seeing his eyes wide open and fluttering like that.

“But did you say I’m a man who doesn’t know the fundamentals? Is that a slanderous remark against my mother?”

Who in the world was Astein, making a fool of Marquis Futor, who was said that even the flying bird that was blessed by God sat on his shoulders?

“I, I’m sorry, Your Excellency.”

Your Excellency? I opened my eyes to the conversation between two unknown people.

Then, I looked at my father’s face, who looked more embarrassed than me. His eyes upon Astein were shaking with displeasure. However, my father seemed to hide his distressed feelings.

“Because you apologized, I will pretend I didn’t hear it.”

“Thank you very much, Your Excellency.”

“I discovered that the prospective saint’s carriage was in trouble on the way from the temple and helped her. So don’t make unnecessary misunderstandings.”

“Yes, Your Excellency. I didn’t expect that to happen.”

My father, who clenched his teeth, seemed upset. Not only the pride of the Marquis Futor was discarded, the tranquillity on his face was also broken.

“The carriage of the prospective saint is so poor… If you don’t have enough money to get a new carriage, I’ll send it from the Grand Duchy.”

“….It’s not like that. She was in a hurry today, so I think she took a less-maintained carriage. We have private and dedicated carriages, so don’t worry.”

There was no private and dedicated carriage. The carriage that broke down today was mostly my carriage.

“Yes, I can count on Marquis Futor’s saying that as clean as the saint. I have to respond to His Majesty’s call, so I will go.”

Astein finished speaking and turned to me.

The cold atmosphere that he showed toward my father disappeared, the indifferent and unassuming face. There was a long distance between us again.

“I’m leaving now.”

“Thank you very much.”

I looked at him for a long time as he got on the horse and left. But he never looked back until he turned at the end of the street.

It was a bit unfortunate and sad. But it’s okay, though, I may still see him every day.

“You! What the hell have you been doing outside?”

The sentiment didn’t get long. I had to drop myself a bit in the roar that poured into my ears.

“I went to the temple.”

I tried to take it easy and answered him.

Until yesterday, I was always avoided his gaze or cluttered my answer. But now, I was looking straight into his eyes. I was even talking back to him.

“Insolent! How dare you!”

My father, who was angry at me, lowered his voice when he saw someone was passing by.

“Follow me.”

I didn’t want to follow him because I knew what was waiting for me in the mansion. But it was inevitable. Anyway, I had no place to escape now.

“Why did you go to the temple without permission? What if you get caught by the officials that you couldn’t use the divine power?”

The attic in the mansion.

This was a punishment room full of terrible memories for me. And as always, my father, who brought me here, pushed me in and yelled at me.

In that image, I recalled the hand of my father who gave me the ‘drug’ in my past.

“Declare that God has called you, and declare that you will be the next saint.”

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“Are you asking me to die?”

“My daughter was born with divine power, so can you pretend to be a real saint and live?”

“Are you lying to me? Do you believe I will follow that?”

“You don’t like it?!… Well, if you don’t die gracefully, I’ll tear down everything you cherished.”