The King's System

"I-Is he alright, nya?" (Catherine)

"H-He should be?" (Arin)

You may be wondering why Catherine and Arin are worried about me. Let me answer that question.

It's because I'm currently crouched in a foetal position, banging my head on some newly made Orichalc.u.m bones.

Why? Because I have the memories from my third life!

And it's completely useless! If I had known they were so horrendous, I wouldn't have wanted them in the first place!

Let me recount it for you.

When I was born, I was a completely normal human. And by normal, I mean the fact that I was shaped like a human. Everything else was totally abnormal!

Instead of crying, I would woof. Instead of asking for milk, I would woof. Instead of playing, I would crawl on all fours and woof. Every sentence I said had a woof attached to it.

The people in the town started thinking I was being possessed by a dog demon! That's not so far from the truth though.

As 'I' grew up, 'I' became less like a dog, and more like an idiot. There were times when I had been sold as a slave and I helped my seller count his money.

There were times when I would fulfil my end of the 'deal', only for the other party to run away and not pay me.

In the end, 'I' had managed to stumble upon the legacy of an old, dead god. For some reason, he took a liking to 'my' idiocy. Probably because he was the God of Idiots.

After that, 'I' officially became a god. Then 'I' slept for two years and died, leaving 'my' 'legacy' in the same place I got it from.

My entire third life took 12 years. And two of them were spent sleeping!

The worst thing is, the memories I have aren't from a bystander's point of view. It's from my own point of view. Which means, I can recall myself saying woof when I was a child!

Now do you understand? Why I would hit myself with a bone?

This will take a very long time to recover from.

I had hoped that my dog would at least learn how to fight or gain some other sort of knowledge.

But no! Not even the god's legacy had any information whatsoever! Actually, I'm certain that the God of Idiots forgot to mention that thing about nutrition. It's also probably why he died as well.

Sigh… I really need to evolve my Necromancy. By then, I should be able to separate my dog's soul from mine and return him to his rightful body of a dog. Or maybe I should put him in a Skeleton dog. At least then he'll be useful to me.

In any case, there is absolutely no way I can allow him to take control of any part of me while I'm in front of Arin and Catherine.

If that happens, then there'll be no turning back. I'll shave my head bald, burn six marks onto my forehead and live as a monk. I'll also consider removing my nose for accuracy.

But if we're talking about accuracy, then I'll have to get shorter as well.

Okay, I've recovered slightly now. At the very least, I should be able to converse with Arin and Catherine.

"I-I'm fine, woof." (Daniel)

Shit! I'm not fine! Uh-oh. Catherine is looking at me in disgust again. Does she think I'm making fun of her by adding woof to the end of my sentences?

"T-This is a very long story, woof." (Daniel)

I should not be talking right now!

I need to get out of here!

---

[3rd Person POV in the room]

"Why was he like that, nya?" (Catherine)

"Don't worry, Catherine. I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it." (Arin)

"I know, nya, but it's still rude, nya!" (Catherine)

"Hey, did you forget what happened when we left Border Town? If that repeats itself, then we'll have a very hard time." (Arin)

"Un. Sorry, Arinnya." (Catherine)

The two girls in the room hugged each other for comfort. They knew what the other was thinking, because they shared the same weird boyfriend.

---

[Daniel POV]

I should become a show magician. I'm the perfect escape artist! That's the second time in two days that I've escaped from someone.

Putting that aside, the experiences from my third life are really traumatic.

Even worse than when I pretended to be a bat vigilante!

This is very serious. I'm considering putting a bucket on my head and turning back into Ned Kelly to stop myself from being embarrassed.

Oh, great! I just have to run into Gorund again.

"Hey, Daniel! Fancy seeing you here!" (Gorund)

"I'm pretty sure you came looking for me, right?" (Daniel)

"Maa, don't sweat the small details!" (Gorund)

That's not small at all!

"What do you want this time?" (Daniel)

"You should be aware of the fact that I have a feud with Kuzzat, right?" (Gorund)

"I'm well aware of that, yes." (Daniel)

"Well, I was thinking that you could help me out with it." (Gorund)

"I'm not an assassin for hire! And I sure as hell am not going to do your dirty work!" (Daniel)

"Wha! I'm insulted! What I was going to suggest is a competition! Do I look like the type of person who would kill someone for something like this?" (Gorund)

"Honestly? Yes." (Daniel)

"…" (Gorund)

"Okay, okay, so what does this competition entail?" (Daniel)

"Blacksmithing of course!" (Gorund)

"But I haven't touched an anvil and hammer at all." (Daniel)

Technically true, since I really haven't touched one since reincarnating.

"Well now's as good a time as any to learn!" (Gorund)

"Are you really going to stake your livelihood on someone like me?" (Daniel)

"You see, I'm a good judge of character. I'm also good at telling talent. You know, Kuzzat used to be my disciple! I picked him up out of nothing, but now he's betrayed me because of that damn Sivod!" (Gorund)

"So, you're telling me that you think I'm a good person and talented at blacksmithing?" (Daniel)

"Exactly! You're a smart one, aren't ya!" (Gorund)

No, I really don't know which one of us is dumber. The person who willingly gets involved with things like this, or the person who drags someone who willingly gets involved with things like this into things like this.

"Fine, alright! I'll participate in your bloody competition! What do I do?" (Daniel)

"Well, first thing's first… you need to buy a forge!" (Gorund)

"*facepalm* You don't even have a forge?? How am I supposed to smith without a forge?!" (Daniel)

"That's why I said you need to buy one!" (Gorund)

I'm starting to regret my decision.