The Lost Princess

She paced back and forth as she fiddled with her hair. Her nerves had never been this rattled before and now she feared for the worse. With her son being used like a puppet by his most trusted friend it felt almost like the Ancestors were giving back all the damage she had done to others ten fold. Many lives were lost and many people hurt. She cost some their happy endings and recked havoc on the kingdom in which her husband loved, but it was all to allow her son to grow up with the life she believed he deserved. She never asked to have children it was expected of her to give life. Her heart beat for only one person and that person betrayed her so all she had left was to fulfill her duty as a concubine and then as a wife.

Now her actions have come back to bit her in the a.s.s and she was a prisoner in her own home. She knew time would only bring her one ending and that was death. Her step daughter would surely have her head for torturing the people of her kingdom.

Jayel was wrong about the princess hating her and her siblings. It was only natural to feel such feelings.

She knew that her son would be killed and displayed as a warning to her other children not to try anything risky. While her body would be reduced to ashes as to erase her existence for history itself.

Everything she had done was lined up in front of her. All her sins knocking at the door all at once. The only one to blame for her misfortune was staring back at her from her reflection in the mirror.

She was once a pure soul. Her only wish to be loved by the person she loved. How easy it is for the soul to turn and the heart to start decaying.

The sad thing was the only regret she held in heart is that the king's death was never supposed to happen. Neither was the death of the queen.She was branded with that blood and yet she was not the one who ordered it. Why kill the one person she loved other than her children? She had everything she wanted. The only piece left in the way was her step daughter. She didn't hate her step daughter, but her presence in the castle was a reminder that she was going to be second to her loved one  the rest of her life.

She walked over to the window and looked out at the garden the king had built just for her. The tree they sat under countless time sat in the middle with it's golden leaves swaying with the gentle breeze.

She thought back to when the king was bed ridden and took her hand in his. His voice was low and horse, his face sunken in, skin pale as paste, and his eyes held little to no light. She remembered him whispering that his baby with the previous queen was living on the castle grounds hidden from everyone including himself. He had not lad eyes on the child since her birth and wanted to see his baby one last time before he returned to the Creators' side. She asked him about her so she could search for her. All he could tell her was that she was a girl. That his daughter was the perfect mirror image of her mother and her name was Loraz.

She cried. The queen had named the child on her death bed and of all the names she could give her first born she chose to name her Loraz.

Part of her wanted to meet Loraz just to see what she looked like the other had grown to hate her so much that it just wanted to have her disappear entirely.

"I am not as wicked as people make me out to be. I only wanted to make sure my son was okay." she whispered to the tree from her window. "Im sorry for all the wicked things I have done. Most of them were not my plan. My son and I didn't know the first thing about ruling a kingdom. My other two children were just as lost. Your death caused many to step forward and announce that I be put to death for crimes I never even thought of committing. The death of the queen was partly my fault. I had told him I just wanted her to fall ill a bit that if she had fallen that maybe I could spend a bit more time with her while she recovered just the two of us. But I was suspected as the person who poisoned her and caused her hard labor and quick death. I never wanted her to die. The night you died was the night I lost all hope of ever being happy. I have to admit I did not love you at first, but a bond grew slowly over the years. I only remember going to your room and finding you split open down the middle. The blood that soaked the bedding and dripped onto the floor was his way of reminding me that he can get to any of my most precious loved ones. My plan to find Loraz was at first to have her killed and be done with the past. I knew she would one day hear of what many say was my fault and confront me. In order to make sure that didn't happen I searched for her so I could have her taken care of. My plans slowly changed as I realized that I didn't have to kill the poor girl because I feared my judgement day. I have been living with my judgement jury since the day the two of you died. So my days on this planet are numbered. I am well aware of the fact that you have been enjoying your afterlife with the previous queen. That there is no one for me to unite with either of you once I am called to the Ancestors' side. I just hope that you can at least greet me when you see me and let me wish the both of you well. I'm sorry for everything I have done. A mother's heart is no reason to do any of the things I have done including the affair with Jayel. I assure you he only filled a void that apparently couldn't be completely filled."

She took a deep breath and tears streamed down her face. Fallen to the floor on her knees she sobbed. Her makeup a mess she looked up at the sky.

"My queen why did you really have to pass on? You promised me that it was forever... I didn't want to face your daughter because she was rumored to be your twin. How could I face you after such a thing happened. I just wanted to punish you for betraying me, but my heart had always been yours... I can only admit this truth now because I have tried to replace you with others and it has not worked out. While a part of me did love the king and enjoyed his affection my heart always ached for you. Was our relationship so wrong, my queen? Was it wrong for us to love each the way we did? The way I still do? When we meet again will you forgive me for my misdeeds and for letting this world corrupt me? I only wish I could have come to this realization sooner. Now the life of our children hang in the balance and for what...my misjudgment and a blind eye to what the man who we placed on the throne in our children's absent is doing."

She sat back on the floor and covered her face and then heard the laughter of someone standing behind her.

"This is just rich. A concubine turned queen who was actually in love with her husband's ex-wife. Tell me when you laid in his arms did you picture laying in hers?" He said as he walked closer to her.

She turned around and saw him walking to her and inched herself further away from him.

"What do you want from me now, Jayel?"

"Now now. Is that any way to talk to the man who helped you fill a void all these years? Tell me did you wish that when I held you it was actually the queen or did you wish for it to be the king?"

"Why do you care if I loved you or not? The whole thing was just purely physical anyway. You used me just as much I used you."

"See I may have been using you, but the thing we had I always thought it was more than just two lost souls looking for attention. Well I can't really be mad at you since I plan to dethrone your son and marry your step daughter."

"Then just kill me and be done with it. Why keep me alive? Why lock me up?"

"Because I'm in the mood to play with you. My marriage to the princess doesn't mean I love her or wish to bed her. It will be solely for the purpose of holding the crown. Well I can't say I won't ever hold her we will have to produce an heir of own, but I will be coming here to visit you most nights. Since your days of being queen are numbered just feel grateful that I am giving you such a wonderful offer. If you refuse this offer your children will pay the price."

She sat there staring a hole into his face her eyes burning with a flame of hatred.

He walked up to her and undid his pants and the fell to the floor. A smile on his as he picked her up carried her to the bed and flung her down.

It should have been easy to let him just climb on top of her and do what he wanted with her, but her blood boiled with discuss and she no longer want to be his play thing.

She kicked at him as he came to mount her and hit him in the stomach and he curled up from the shock.

Free from him she made her way to the window as he reached for her and pulled off her silk robe. Jumping up on the seating space in front of the glass she pushed the window open and she inhaled deeply then uttered,

"My children forgive me..."

Then just as she looked back at Jayel who made his way to the window to grab her down she leaned forward and pushed herself out of the window.

Jayel reached the window just in time to see the queen hit ground below taking her life and ending her pain.

"No, Queen Loraz!" Jayel yelled. "Dammit..."

Jayel pulled himself inside and sat by the window as he called for the guards. Tears streamed from his eyes and he quickly wiped them away.

He looked up at the sky and whispered,

"So you chose death over everything," He looked back down at the Queen's body and spit at it,"Fine, died and live with your guilt in the afterlife."

He then got up and dressed himself before the guards came to the room.

He gave instructions to clean up the mess and speak of it to no one then he walked out of the room his mind now even more focused on getting the princess.