The One after my Heart

"Who is Lianna Walker to you?"

The question rang in Kyra's head as she remembered the words as she sat there on the forest ground covered in soft grass now next to the two sleeping girls.

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A low chime rang out in the darkness.

"Alright everyone it's time to wake up now!"

"Today's Sunday and you know what it means. Some of you get to go to a new home today. You don't want everyone to think you're a bad naughty child do you? Quickly now, wake up before I get angry", came the hoarse voice of a woman as the lights were turned on at five o'clock in the morning.

A little figure on top of one of the bunker beds pulled up her blankets closer, trying to get just a few minutes of extra sleep. But, just like many other children, her blankets were pulled out as she was reprimanded by the caretaker woman in charge of them to wake up.

"That includes you too, Kyra! Come on now. I hear it's your birthday today after all. Are you going to meet your mother like this?" the woman said at the little figure trying to squeeze out a little more sleep.

A young, thin girl around seven years old woke up with a grumpy face as she was woken up. 

She had short brown hair and was lean as a stick, but her light-brown eyes endeared people to her as soon as they looked into them. Her thin cheekbones and collarbone stuck out, showcasing her thin skeleton-like figure.

But soon, she brightened up as she recalled the words of the caretaker and tried to cheer herself up.

Today was definitely the day her mother would show up and take her home. That's right, she had to look her best.

Her lithe figure jumped off from the bed as she wished Mrs Gonsalves, their caretaker, good morning and rushed to freshen up. Mrs Gonsalves, who was in her fifties, couldn't help but give a pitiful sigh and shook her head at the hopeful child who went past her with a cheery smile.

If only the little girl knew the truth. Sigh! But it was for best if they'd realise the truth on their own in time and accept the truth since it couldn't be forced on them. She'd seen far too many orphans in her twenty-year service here.

There were all kinds of children in here. One's with broken families, who'd lost their parents, one's who'd been abandoned, etc., among many other cases. Most children usually had a guardian or some sort outside of a familial tie who couldn't provide basic essentials for the child.

Life for Kyra was like a routine here at the orphanage. It was a small orphanage home set up by the local church that had about forty to fifty children roughly.

They cleaned up their rooms, prepared for school, prayed and ate breakfast. The day would be long for Kyra and the children. After school, they had to study and then do chores like work and help out in the kitchen, or gardening, or helping take care of other babies in the orphanage until it was time for them to have supper and then go to bed at nine.

Sundays were everyone's favourite day, though. This was the day when usually, after the prayers at the nearby church, parents or families looking to adopt would come in and pick one of them to give them a new home as they embraced and welcomed a new family member into their lives.

The chances of a young child in their earlier years of finding a home and getting chosen to be adopted were quite high compared to the rest of the older children. Very rarely did older children get chosen. And the older one got, the lesser his or her chances were.

Soon it was noon, and the time came when families started coming in, and all of the young ones were gathered in the main hall in line. Kyra stood amongst the other eager, curious kids as they stood in a line. Husbands and wives held each other's hands as they pointed and spoke in hushed voices. Some even took the initiative to talk to the ones they like.

They were led by the headmistress and caretaker, Mrs Clarence, a plump old woman in her late fifties, as she escorted the parents and introduced them to the children with a beaming smile. Everyone was on their best behaviour today.

Kyra found it very odd and disheartening that none of them ever took an interest or a second glance at her all these years. All these years, not a single one had even approached or spoken to her.. Even the headmistress and caretakers couldn't figure it out since they spared no expense at feeding the malnourished looking child.

But no matter how much she ate, her pale lithe figure stayed the same. They were far more children better-looking than her.

'Ugly Kyra', that's what few of her brothers and sisters nicknamed her, though they had to stop bullying after the one time when she bit one of the older boys in anger till he bled.

She was punished, of course. But her actions seemed to have worked. The bullying stopped, but the nickname still stuck, though now it was just behind her back. Initially, it bothered her, but soon Kyra didn't mind and even liked it, for she had heard the story of the Ugly Duckling from her headmistress Mrs Clarence later on when the plump headmistress found the little girl crying in one of the closets one afternoon.

From that moment on, the young Kyra believed someday she was going to grow into a very, very beautiful swan, just like the ugly duckling.

Soon time passed, and the eager look in Kyra's grew dull as she looked for some sign of her mother or maybe even father to come for her. But no one ever showed up. And as time passed the girl got quieter and more reserved. To see a lonely young child being depressed at an early age itself was truly heart-breaking for the caretakers to see. Despite being surrounded by people all the time and never being alone, Kyra was truly lonely.

Soon a couple of her brothers and sisters were chosen, and the parents were escorted out of the hall. Tears formed in young Kyra's eyes as she couldn't help herself.

She found a hand on her shoulder as it patted her on the back. It was the old Mrs Gonsalves who looked at her with sympathetic eyes and consoled her with a sigh. Her heart ached as she'd seen that same familiar look many times over the years.

Mrs Clarence remembered that seven years ago when a beautiful young woman came rushing in from the pouring rain one night and begged her to take care of her baby until she could return. The young woman repeatedly promised over and over again that she would be back and had to take care of something urgently.

Mrs Clarence doubted if the young woman would ever come back since she'd seen several mothers abandon their children in the same way, but nonetheless, the look in the young woman's eyes was desperate and seemed sincere. All the young woman left was the name Lianna Walker and said her baby's name was Kyra Walker. After a tearful moment, she gave her baby a fierce hug and a kiss as she cried and bid goodbye.

Mrs Clarence had spoken to the young girl about her mother giving her hope when she was heartbroken and refused to eat anything three years ago, over a similar occasion like one that'd happened today. The headmistress and staff were anxious when this already malnourished looking child refused to eat anything. Laws were getting stricter, and if the authorities thought they had starved the child to death, they'd be in trouble.

Over a couple of years, the headmistress soon shelved the thought of this Lianna Walker coming back for her child. Even the local police authorities didn't seem to have any data on the person. It was just another one of those cases, she decided. After which, she tried convincing a few of the interested parents to consider adopting Kyra.

But every time, no matter how hard she tried and praised the young child, they never took a second glance at the little girl when they showed up. Maybe it was the scrawny malnourished look of the child, she wondered to herself at times in resignation.

"Nobody wants me. Even mother does not want me" said the little girl in a low tone as silent tears dropped from her eyes.

"Don't give up,Kyra. I'm sure your mother will come by next year on your birthday. She didn't seem the type to abandon her child. Maybe she couldn't make it this year."

"How about you can go and watch a little television for now? There's no need to do any chores for today since it's your birthday. Mrs.Gonsalves please take her inside." consoled the headmistress Mrs Clarence and give her hope as she had to tend to the parents and family waiting outside.

A dejected young Kyra nodded miserably as she was led away once by Mrs Gonsalves, who tried to cheer her up.

As time passed, over the years and similar absence of her so-called mother coming for, Kyra soon began to realise the truth. Maybe her mother never intended to show up after all. She had been abandoned just like the few of her fellow brothers and sisters.

Perhaps the only fondness she reserved was for Mrs Gonsalves and the headmistress since they were the ones who stayed behind with her every time.

But even while young Kyra was around them, they could feel the wall she'd put between her and the world. The wall which helped and protected them from getting hurt or being let down, but at the same time kept one's from coming inside and get closer.

The headmistress and Mrs Gonsalves sighed. Most orphans usually grew up with this mentality and mindset as they became independent. Children who spent time at an orphanage often learn to depend on no one but themselves.

Little Kyra had matured mentally. Despite the pain of not having a so-called family pricking her reality now and then, she grew up to be a kind, independent girl thanks to her caretakers. Though now, there a fierce dream and desire rooted within her. Someday she would have a home of her own and her own family. People whom she swore she would never abandon. And then she would be happy just like her fellow temporary brothers and sisters who found a new home. That became Kyra's definition of happiness.

Eventually, Kyra soon grew up and had to move out to make space for other incoming children. And soon in time, in a few years, she moved to New York looking out for better opportunities and a better life, picking up on various jobs until one fine day Mitchell Gaffer approached and hired her.

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"Who is Lianna Walker to you?"

The words of Nisa and Maya's mother kept resounding in her head like an old tape on loop as Kyra found her shoulders shivering.

Kyra sat there in a daze mumbled," No.. it's impossible. It's impossible!!! What the hell is going on!!?"