1734 It Hurt Her Heart Tremendously
Father looked quite haggard and exhausted.

He only ended up this way because he was looking for her.

Had she been too emotional and agitated to chase him away like that?

...

Would he have ended up in danger by rushing on the roads in the dark?

The more she thought about it, the more unsettled she was— she began to blame herself for it.

Chu Qi knew what was going through her mind when he saw the struggle and pain in her eyes.

He kissed her on the forehead and comforted her. “Don’t worry, Ji’er. There are guards with him. Nothing will happen to His Majesty.”

Ji’er clenched his collar, eager for assurance from him. “Is that true?”

“Yes, it’s true. Don’t worry.”

Ji’er finally fell silent after hearing this.

Chu Qi brought her a cup of hot water after carrying her into the inn and settling her down.

“Have some hot water. I’ve got the server to make something for you. Go to sleep after having your meal.”

Ji’er looked at him and hesitated as she gripped the cup.

“Is there something you want to say, Ji’er?” Chu Qi noticed her reaction and rubbed her head as he asked softly.

“Nothing.” Ji’er shook her head and decided not to tell him about her pregnancy.

Ji’er wanted to go to sleep after she finished eating. Chu Qi brought in some hot water and helped her wipe her face and soak her feet.

It made Ji’er feel even guiltier as she watched the man busying himself over her. “You don’t need to bother yourself with me, Lil Qi. Get some rest.”

Chu Qi rolled up his sleeves and gave her a dry towel to wipe her feet. His eyes closed slightly. “Don’t leave me again, Ji’er.”

Ji’er was taken aback as she looked at him with mixed emotions.

She had not looked at him properly when they were in the suburbs. She could now see his skinny and sallow face clearly under the bright lights. The sight pained her immensely.

Her decision to leave seemed to have hurt many people.

When Chu Qi saw her head lowered in silence, he thought she was still considering running away and his heart sank. He said, “Ji’er, take me with you if you still want to leave. Don’t disappear without a word again. If you do that, how will I ever find you?”

His words were filled with loneliness and emptiness and it hurt Ji’er’s heart tremendously.

She lifted her head and finally reached out her hands to cup his face.

“Lil Qi, I thought you wouldn’t mind me leaving, just like how you left for a few years back then. Didn’t you leave without looking back too?” Her eyes were lowered as she spoke. She sounded pitiful. “I’m a curse. The moment I was born, I almost killed Mother and then you lost your memory and sight because of me. I’m scared that I will bring you bad luck again…”

“Why are you so silly, Ji’er? How could you be bad luck? I won’t allow you to say that of yourself!”

Chu Qi pursed his lips. He was both enraged and heartbroken. His tone became slightly sharper. “Do you really plan to force yourself into a corner just because of something that happened when you were born? Can’t you see how much your parents and your loved ones are worried about you? Everyone is out there looking for you because they care. Your grandparents, uncle, and aunt. They all went out searching for you.

“They all left behind everything in the hopes of getting you home. Your mother has gotten ill because she was so worried about you. What would your parents feel if they heard you say that about yourself? Can you bear to let everyone worry over you so much?”
Ji’er was taken aback as she looked at him in astonishment.

“My grandparents, they…”

“They are all your loved ones. How could they sit at home quietly when they learned that you ran away? Ji’er, everyone was worried about you when you left home without a word.”

Ji’er could not say anything—she stammered and her eyes quickly filled with tears.

Chu Qi could never bring himself to be harsh with Ji’er, but when he heard the things she said, his heart ached and he was more anxious than ever, which was why he could not help but be more stern than usual.

How could she talk about herself that way?

 

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