When We Were Perfect

The waves will find their shores

Because what appears to be far is closer than it seems

I admit that it is my heart's fault

May no one be helpless like me...….

Previously, 

Amy placed both her hands on her hips, she didn't know how she was going to manage it because for one Ozan might not even bear her presence and recognise her much less get comfortable with her and allow her to feed him. What would she even say to him?

"God please help me!" Amy whispered, sending a silent prayer.

********************

"Silas, would you tell me what is it now!" Daniel muttered in a frustrated tone as Silas sighed for the tenth time sipping his coffee..

"The coffee is good in this hospital!" He started.

"Don't tell me you asked me to come with you to the canteen just to have a cup of coffee. Ozan might awake anytime soon and I want to be there with him!" 

"He is not alone, the nurse is with him!" Silas said only to receive a deadly glare from Daniel. His glare was never deadly but with blood-red eyes and dark circles, it was. His eyes being the deepest shade of grey-blue didn't help at all.

"Idiot!" Daniel mumbled getting up from his chair.

"Okay! Fine, I will tell you." Silas spoke nervously, he himself didn't know why he was nervous. Maybe because he made a decision that wasn't his to make in the first place.

"You have exactly 2 minutes to say whatever you have!" Daniel said, perching on the seat again, crossing his arms.

Silas gave him a small smile, dragging the cutlery and hot coffee away from him towards his side, in case.

"When you were inside with Ozan. Dr Bursin came to explain some things but before he could reach you, my impatient self asked him about the problem and let's just say whatever he said about Ozan's health wasn't good!" 

Daniel uncrossed his arms, a dreadful expression began to form on his face.

"What is it?" 

"It's about Ozan's deteriorating health, he has lost 2 pounds in just two days. Artificial food isn't helping him and we can't give him baby food and formula milk at this stage!" Silas responded with a serious expression.

Daniel exhaled, raking his hand through his hair.

"He told me that Ozan will get better!"

"They are trying, they have to remove the infection first but at the same time keep his body going too. This treatment is taking a toll on him and there is no way he will recover from that morbidity without getting thinner and weak!" Silas informed, observing Daniel's state but he only stared at the floor with his hands on the table like fighting himself not to break.

"There must be some way, I can't lose him, Silas. I can't" Daniel mumbled now looking at him with a fallen expression looking around rubbing his neck muscles at the back trying to get rid of the ache.

Silas dragged his chair near him, patting his shoulder.

"There is a way!" He said, making Daniel turn to him in a whiplash.

"What, what is it!" He asked a bit hopefully.

"He told me that breastfeeding could be helpful in such cases!" Silas said with a gulp. Daniel's expression again wavered before he began to go into deep thought.

"We can contact childcare or any other agency to help with this. It wouldn't be difficult to find a woman willing to feed him!" Daniel said after a moment pulling out his phone from the pocket. The thought of Amy didn't even cross his mind for once.

"let me call Ashton!" But before he could dial his number, Silas spoke.

"There is already someone who is willing to do the job!"

Daniel knitted his brows looking up at an uneasy looking Silas.

"Who?"

"His mo-mother!" Silas uttered, preparing himself for the outburst but it didn't happen. Confused he gazed to his side only to see a rigid Daniel glaring at the cups of coffee in front, gripping the phone in a deathly hold that Silas had of the idea that it might get cracked.

"Where is she?" Daniel muttered with a not so pleasant tone.

"The physician is doing her formality checkup, she is in the room beside Ozan's!" 

"This happened in front of you!" Daniel sneered now looking at him.

"Yes, I also suggested the idea!" Silas admitted ready to run away from the devil.

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR SENSES!" Daniel shouted, making the people at the canteen yelp and stare at the show.

'Here goes nothing' Silas thought awkwardly, looking away.

"Daniel calm down and don't create a scene here!" Silas mumbled trying to reach his arm but he stood up in anger. Never had he seen Daniel in such an angry state just on the mere name of Amy. It was the complete and utter opposite of a lit face and happy smile that formed on his face in the past. Ozan's health really triggered him a lot. But he couldn't blame him, Amy had done worse.

"Don't you calm me, Silas. It wasn't your decision to make!" Daniel shouted making Silas sigh and walk out of the canteen grabbing his arm in the tightest way he could not wanting to give people a show. Reaching outside the hospital building, Daniel managed to get his arm out of his hold.

"Are you..." 

"Yes I am completely in my senses, Daniel Saritas, it is only you here who isn't thinking with his mind instead you are letting the resentment and hurt in your heart take over make impulsive decisions and no I can't let you do that especially when Ozan is involved!" Silas reasoned heaving.

"You don't understand that Silas, I can't let her back in our lives when I had painfully moved on and closed her chapter. Do you think I can trust her again not to play with Ozan for a while and then leave like usual! He is a child, I won't be able to see him getting attached only to be left again!" Daniel muttered with an unspoken intensity staring at him and then turning to leave.

"But would you rather allow his health to be at stake, let him wither every day. Take away the chance of motherly love he would be having." 

Daniel scoffed.

"Where was she when I begged her to hold him, consider him, feed him. She ignored him despite everything I did to make her acknowledge our son Silas, our own son!!" Daniel growled, hurt visible on his face but that hurt was becoming a scar now like all others he had endured in the past.

"I know what you have suffered from Daniel but I also know that for Ozan you can move the world just for his happiness. You have to do this, take this bitter sip of life again." Silas said, stepping closer to him.

Daniel shook his head, slumping on the marble stairs of the hospital entrance. People around oblivious to them, Silas sighed sitting closer to him.

"Daniel even you can't deny that she can't have any ulterior motive for Ozan and as much as I don't want to say that she doesn't deserve to be with him again, we both can't deny that Ozan needs his mother and this time I have seen the desperate look on her face. Maybe she is willing to try and rectify her mistakes." Silas uttered.

Daniel closed his eyes in a silent sigh, different thoughts and Amy's past behaviour flashing before his eyes.

The truth was she couldn't let her back again in his life. Having her back would mean seeing her every day closely, going through the same emotions and turmoil he had stepped out of. Being the same vulnerable man he is in front of her, he knows that Amy had the power to make him melt with just a mere smile and touch. He couldn't let that happen, moreover, he didn't want it to happen, he wants to remember everything she said, every word of her insult etched on his heart. 

"But can you let Ozan suffer!" His inner voice chided.

"What would be the difference between you and her if you let your emotions hurt others, more specifically Ozan!" 

Yeah, it wouldn't be that difficult. He just had to keep his guard on. He had moved on from that person who would even beg for love from Amy but this time he won't be doing that.

"For your son, Daniel!" His heart pleaded.

Yes, he can do this, for Ozan he can go through every hell even if it meant letting Amy back but only for Ozan's sake nothing else. He has buried his love, he wouldn't let that resurface. He is a strong person who can keep his guard on.

"What are you thinking?" Silas interrupted his thoughts.

"Nothing, for Ozan I am willing to do this!" Daniel replied, exhausted, opening his eyes.

Silas gave him an encouraging smile.

"For Ozan, it is!"