When Your Pain Becomes Mine

Hearing Sun, Gyeonhui quickly remembered the day when he was in that car accident.

'... The lady at the restaurant… Who is she?'

'A woman I met at a bar a few days ago.'

'What…?'

He also remembered her outraged expression in response to his imposing tone.

'I didn't sleep with her, so don't worry.'

He recalled her face at that time and how pained it was. It felt as if the whole world had crashed down once he said that.

'... Is that what she felt?'

His knees staggered weakly after he realized precisely what he had done to her. He barely kept standing by leaning against the wall while biting his lower lip.

"Get out of the way, please."

She said, but he stood stock-still on the spot.

As she tried to go around him, he grabbed her and stopped her.

"Gyeonhui..."

"... I'm sorry." He said, even before her words ended. "... It's all my fault."

He slowly turned his head and looked at her eyes.

"What do you mean it is all your fault?"

"I'm sorry for making you imagine bad things."

Hearing him, her eyes started shaking.

"On the day of the accident, I told you that nothing was going on with Chaekyeong and me, but I made you imagine bad things about her and me because I didn't explain what I did with her to you. I've just realized that it was scarier to imagine things that you don't know."

His voice calmly subsided and flowed to her ears.

"... You don't need to apologize to me. It's all over."

"No, it's not over yet. At least not for me." Gyeonhui looked straight at her and said. "I was going crazy while thinking that you were going to be in his arms. I also saw you smiling at someone other than me. It made me crazy."

'... No way.'

Sun bit her lower lip to stop her shaking mind.

"No matter what I've done with Dr. Park is not of your business anymore. Let me go." She tried to pass by him.

"Cheonsun." He then called her name while grabbing her shoulder. He slowly started speaking. "We can't do it like this..."

Her shoulders trembled thinly after hearing his words.

"... It's over."

"... Lie." He said it in pain. "... You still like me."

"No, I don't."

She kept her bold expression and responded with a more resolute tone.

"... Lie."

"I said I don't," Sun yelled at him.

However, her eyes were already shaking violently.

Gyeonhui clutched his c.h.e.s.t tightly while biting his lower lip.

The pain in her heart was still being passed on to his heart without missing a beat.

He raised his head and looked at her before he slowly started speaking again,

"... You still love me."

'Kung.'

His words felt like somebody was hammering her c.h.e.s.t.

65. I want to go.

Sun quickly wiped away the tears on her cheeks with her hands.

With a short deep breath, she calmed down and started speaking while looking at him.

"No, I don't."

The pain in his c.h.e.s.t felt like it was squeezing his heart.

Gyeonhui endured his anguish and looked at her again.

"Sun..."

"Have you ever had a drink that has exceeded the expiration date?"

"... What?"

"It was so terrible, and it also smelled awful."

Sun remembered a while ago when she was drinking a can of beer with Ari while gazing into the air.

"What are you talking about?"

Gyeonhui was frustrated because he didn't understand what she was trying to say.

"It's the same as the separation of a man and a woman in a relationship." She looked at him and said, "The separation is also terrible like the beer which has expired. Just like us now."

Her words flew at him and pierced his heart like a sharp dagger.

He looked at her with shaking eyes without saying anything.

"The feeling that you have for me is not love. You just don't like the fact that I would sleep with someone else because you think that I'm yours. You still think that you own me."

"No!"

"Yes. That's right. That's exactly why you asked me if I've slept with Dr. Park as soon as you saw me."

"That's…" He was speechless.

"Please don't apologize. We don't have to exchange apologies anymore.

Sun pushed his hand that was holding her arm at the end of her words.

Gyeonhui started speaking in a hurry when he watched her turning against him without any hesitation and walking away from him.

"... then how can you explain your tears…"

When she heard his cry, she hesitated.

"Why did you cry if you don't have any feelings for me anymore? I know that you're crying because you still haven't forgotten about me yet."

Hearing his urgent voice, she slowly turned around, looked at him, and said. "Don't be mistaken." Her eyes were sunken deeply. "I have no feelings left for you. It's not your business anymore whether I'm crying or smiling."

'Kung.'

Her words struck his heart like a hammer.

After looking at him for a moment, Sun quickly turned her body and started walking toward home.

She was moving away farther, Gyeonhui tried to reach out and follow her.

"Cheon… sun... Oop… ugh…"

However, because of sudden abdominal pain, he grabbed his stomach tightly and had to sit down, unable to call her name.

The pain he felt after not breathing properly struck him down.

He had no choice but to watch her depart with a distorted expression on his face.

***

'Bang.'

"Hah…"

When Sun returned home, she breathed a long sigh as soon as she closed the door.

"Arf, arf."

Labong looked up at her anxiously.

"... It's alright. It's all over."

Sun smiled weakly and stroked Labong; she was so tired. She sat on the couch and closed her eyes slowly.

"It's all over... but why… is it so painful..."

Her eyelids started quivering.

Her tears flowed down from her eyes as she began to cry. She wiped her face with her hand roughly, seemingly disgusted with the tears.

"Hah…"

She sighed for a long time, trying to calm her heart, but it wasn't easy. To take a shower, she stood up from the couch, but the sketchbook that was in the living room came into her eyes.

Her eyes, while looking at the sketchbook, shook hard, but she struggled to turn her head from it and headed to the bathroom.

After a while, the sharp sound of water was heard from the bathroom.