Yohan Loves Tite

“You love her, don’t you? Don’t you want her? Don’t you lust for her? Don’t you want to kiss her? Don’t you want to hug her? Don’t you want to whisper sweet nothings? Don’t you want to interlock your fingers and hold her hands tightly? Don’t you want to be recognized as a lover in front of everyone? If you can’t tell everyone, wouldn’t you at least want to tell her your true feelings?”

Ha!

Yohan burst into a short sigh. He clenched his teeth and spoke fast

“You always put me to the test. I hate you. I loathe you. I’m sick and tired of you. I’m not supposed to be shaken anymore. Whenever I see you, always. I shouldn’t be shaken anymore. Whenever I see you being so confident and greedy in love, I always.”

He clenched the locket in his chest. He clenched it stronger than when we held the sacred item.

“I’m sick and tired of you! I don’t want to see you! I’m okay with her being happy, but how can you be so greedy? You’re so confident that it feels like I, who can’t do that, is such a fool… Argh…”

It was the moment when the Holy Father the Pope, who was always kind and gentle, showed his true nature. Cardinal Jun was surprised and hiccuped. I was not surprised. Considering the weight and viscosity of his emotions, this level of true nature was nothing.

“You really don’t want her? Is it okay to just watch?”

“Yes, it’s okay. That’s-that’s my love.”

That’s not love. That’s a defeat, an excuse, and a waiver. It’s a petty compromise. The word lingered around my neck. It wasn’t until I heard him that I realized I was wrong.

The others were right. I was wrong.

It’s not love. It’s a waiver. My love is not like that. I thought Yohan’s heart was like mine. Of course, the word that expresses our feelings is love, but in the end, the two were different.

I was wrong. As I admitted it, I laughed automatically.

“My love knows no compromise. I don’t know how to give up. But Holy Father, your love is based on compromise, renunciation, and defeat. Very well… If that’s your love, I’m wrong. Your Holiness… you… you weren’t in love with me.”

I couldn’t help laughing. Hot water flowed down my cheeks.

“Yes. That’s love to you, Your Holiness, but not to me. You didn’t love me. Yes. Yes… yes. It wasn’t love. Yes. It truly wasn’t. Love is…”

I have done many things without hesitation because of the belief that Yohan loves me. The moment I found out that he didn’t love me, I realized what I had done. What on earth did I throw away for a cowardly feeling, which is not love?

My honor. My family’s honor. My parents’ love. My siblings’ love. My friendship with my friends. And even my pride. I let go of all that because he loved me.

“What have I done?”

The two men didn’t soothe me crying because I was upset. They were just watching. Cardinal Jun said I was a bad woman who didn’t know how to be considerate to others, and the Pope couldn’t take his eyes off me with a pale face.

I went back to the family as soon as my recovery was over, and my father and mother kicked me out to a villa outside the capital. The Holy Father, the hope of mankind, told them that I had changed my mind and stopped them because it was an extreme treatment. I just went to the villa. Thinking about what I’ve done so far, I am ashamed to see my parents, and I couldn’t bear it.

A woman who abandoned everything she had for a man who didn’t even love her.

It’s a perfect skit to be stoned for performing on the street.

***

Reese was shaking and watched Tite wear the ceremonial dress prepared for her. Reese couldn’t forget the trembling when she first received that dress. What about the nights she spent agonizing after receiving that dress? It was a ceremonial dress built only for one person in the world, Reese. How many people stayed up all night and worked hard to complete that ceremonial dress? Tite was wearing the dress prepared for Reese.

Tite wore Reese’s clothes and adorned herself with Reese’s cosmetics. She put on Reese’s jewelry and put on Reese’s shoes.

Finally, She stuck Reese’s hair in her hair using pins. With several layers of veil, Tite looked just like Reese.

Tite spun around in place. She clasped the skirt of the fancy dress, and greeted Reese.

“Am I pretty?”

Reese couldn’t say a word.