Your Scandals Are Way Cuter Than You

For people who also read [Your Memes Are Way Cuter Than You], don’t worry! In the matter of plot points, this story is more of a side-story than a direct sequel! There’s some spoilers, but more of the painfully obvious variety like [the MC and ML got together, it’s a HE1happy ending]. But I’ll still put up a spoiler warning if there is a need! Don’t worry~ 

In that note, for the first 3 chapters or so, I’ll post a daily update, and the rest will be weekly (every Thursday). After [Your Memes] is finished, I’ll update more often!

As usual, be prepared for numerous footnotes

Spoiler: Jiang Xun’s career

At the end of February, a hot topic2trending topic was trending on Weibo.

#BlackAndRed3black = bad/infamous, red = good/famous. Both in the same sentence means controversialActorsSummary# 

[Black and red? Actor? Then it can only be Jiang Ying. His acting skills are poor, and his personality is shit. He’s only an idol in looks. More suited to be a keyboard warrior than anything.] 

[I also nominate Jiang Ying. After the previous trumpet4anonymous side account scolding5bashing/flaming incident, I didn’t like him very much. Besides, his fans also follow his example, being a group of aggressive pieces of shits. They keep scolding Ye Xiaohan all day long.] 

[Hey hey, be careful when talking about them! They are fucking vicious, okay. What’s their name again? Silhouette6the hanzi is 剪影, “影” is the same as “Ying” in Jiang Ying.?] 

[??? Vicious? Aggressive? What the fuck is your problem, huh?? Can you stop dragging Jiang Ying-gege  all day long. You little kiddies should stop being online all the time; go finish your homework. Or if you are somehow an adult with this kind of childish mentality; go do your overtime work already. Shoo shoo!] 

[Speak of the devil and they shall come.] 

[I also nominate someone: Qi Zhu. In terms of being black and red, he should be worthy in contesting Jiang Ying’s coffee position7position in entertainment industry; if a text says “big coffee” it means they’re a big-name celebrity..] 

[But if I say so myself, Qi Zhu’s acting skills are not bad, but he is too indifferent. The rumors said that he’s very cold even with his co-workers on the filming set; to the point of making a newcomer cry. Is it considered playing a big name? Several people have picked up on this.] 

[There is also a lot of other black material about Qi Zhu.] 

[It’s so scary… Let’s stop talking about him. I heard that his agency’s PR department is very powerful.]

[Fuck? The second commenter changed their name and ran away? Are you so afraid? ]

[Sisters, I have a dangerous idea. You say, what would happen if these two people starred in a drama together? ]

[A fight will break out of course! FliesRubbingTheirHands.jpg] 

“Netizens nowadays are so naive, there is no such possibility.” At a charity dinner, Jiang Ying watched the debate on Weibo and sighed, “First of all, Qi Zhu and I would never star in a drama together.”

“Why?” Chen Shu, Jiang Ying’s assistant, asked curiously, “He is a popular actor, and you can be regarded as a… traffic8internet famous celeb. What if there is a possibility of cooperation someday?” 

“We don’t have a good relationship. We will fight when we see each other. This is something that many people in the industry know.” Jiang Ying shook his head, “Any ambitious director wouldn’t be happy to see us filming together.”

The person who was making a speech at the dinner party was dressed in a proper suit, with neatly combed hair. He glanced in their direction as if he heard something.

The content of the speech was given by the organizer, which meant it was rather boring.

Assistant Chen saw Jiang Ying give a quick middle finger to Qi Zhu, who was still speaking on the stage.

Assistant Chen: “…” 

He couldn’t deny it anymore. Their relationship was really bad, and Jiang Ying should be the provocateur between the two.

“If you’re controversial, then you have both fans and anti-fans.” Jiang Ying turned on the laptop he carried with him, and changed the subject, “Like me, who can grasp how frequently I got hacked9get into scandals/netizens bashing you/etc. Out of this new generation of actors, I will be the one who get popular legitimately.” ” 

“Understand?” Jiang Ying shook his wine glass at his assistant, who was sitting to his right.

“No… I don’t really understand.” Jiang Ying’s assistant, Chen Shu, shook his head sincerely.

This controversial actor could still have a sense of superiority because of that. Jiang Ying was definitely the first of his kind—

Jiang Ying, controversial as hell, a rookie actor. His mother was the famous screenwriter Song Jingxi; his father was the legendary actor Jiang Zheng, and his older brother was the newly retired e-sports World Champion, and his older brother’s spouse10a note on this: it’s actually “partner” but they’re already married. It’s not brother-in-law because there’s no specific word for “older brother’s husband” in Chinese. was Gu Wei, the main dancer of the top boygroup T.ATW. 

The whole family was striving for the top, only he was content with the status quo.

But this scum was particularly easy to be satisfied; paddling on the ocean of life with peace of mind.

If it wasn’t for the frequent contact with the agency to help remove hot searches, or the frequent reply of “no comment” in front of the media, Chen Shu felt that his job as an assistant was quite comfortable.

“For example, I haven’t been hacked this month.” Jiang Ying took the mobile phone aside, and clicked on the Weibo icon, “And I seem to have done something very popular today.”

At the airport in the afternoon, he severely criticized a professional paparazzi with fierce words and a sincere attitude. Even a passing auntie gave him a thumbs up.

Assistant Chen also opened Weibo, and then fell silent.

He didn’t know if Jiang Ying would gain new fans, but Jiang Ying was indeed listed on the hot search.

#JiangYingCallingPeopleOutOnAirport#

Assistant Chen: “…” Was this the thing that Jiang Ying said he could do? “Controlling the frequency of getting hacked”? 

Doubtful.

This Weibo’s hot search was on the top. News from the entertainment industry spread like wildfire, and so it was no wonder that many people at this dinner party cast their curious gazes at them.

On the other seat, Jiang Ying answered a call.

“Ge? I came to the charity dinner to fill in your place. What’s the matter?” Jiang Ying asked.

“You still dare to ask me what’s wrong, huh? Not long after I took over your agency company, you already made trouble for me.” On the other end of the phone, Jiang Ying’s older brother Jiang Xun said angrily, “I understand why your manager keeps complaining to me now.” 

“It’s obvious that those people made a big fuss out of nothing.” Jiang Ying said, “I just scolded a paparazzi. No matter how you look at it, it’s a common occurrence. In fact, I shouldn’t get hacked over this, I should get more fans instead!”

“Fans? You are quite capable of making new black fans11anti-fans.” Jiang Xun calmed down for a few seconds, and then said, “If you scold the paparazzi, just scold them normally. Unlike what you did. In front of so many cameras, you cussed out his family and wished them calamity12JY actually told the paparazzi’s mom to die, but in an euphemistic way, so I also try to soften the language.!” 

“He used to scold me at my fan bar13a fan-only forum on Weibo, and this time that scum also pushed down one of my fans. The little girl’s knees were bleeding. Shouldn’t he hide his mother first before surfing the Internet and going out to make trouble?” Jiang Ying is confident in his stance, “I only have a few true fans, shouldn’t I protect them?” 

Jiang Xun: “…”

“Okay, fine, got it.” Jiang Xun took the phone away, “I worry about you. Don’t cause any more trouble at this dinner party.” 

Jiang Ying replied perfunctorily, hung up the phone and sighed, “Married people do talk more. He didn’t used to be this chatty.”

Assistant Chen didn’t dare to talk about his boss, so he pretended he heard nothing. Hear no evil, as they said.

Controversial topics were easier to trend on Weibo. It’s not surprising that netizens have seen such topics. In a certain video that was reposted on Weibo, the third-tier traffic star Jiang Ying was featured. He was standing inside the crowd at the airport, pointed at a paparazzi, his mouth was beautifully spitting out cuss words and insults.

The person who posted the video obviously had ulterior motives. They cut out the part where the paparazzi had previously pushed a girl down, leaving only Jiang Ying’s cursing the paparazzi and all their family.

Jiang Ying’s fans “Silhouette” have long been familiar with this kind of situation–

Silhouette Has Always Loved Gege: #BoycottPaparazzi# our gege has always been genuine, forgive him.

Has Jiang Ying Posted Today: #Jiang-Goose-Ying’sFirstFlight# if you have time to eat melons14endulge in gossip, why don’t you pay attention to gege’s supertopic instead? You can stay in a good mood all day just by looking at his face. 

Jiang Ying’s anti-fans didn’t let these fans change their actions—

User99236788: @JiangYingKANI15it’s Jiang Ying’s Weibo username. KANI is crab in Japanese, shouldn’t you thank others for taking your pictures? Be grateful that they at least care! 

Hydrangea Baby: This black and red actor is really arrogant.

Assistant Chen browsed around the Weibo comment area, and found that after this kind of video was released, the most interesting reactions were by the passersby16neutral netizens on Weibo. 

Passerby: Jiang Ying is on the hot search again? I heard that he is the son of the movie emperor17award-winning actor Jiang Zheng. It’s a pity, but he is really popular when he keeps his mouth shut. 

Assistant Chen agreed with passersby’s point of view.

At this time, Jiang Ying was wearing a white hoodie, and he didn’t have any ostentatious hairstyle because he was attending a charity dinner. He was sitting at the table, holding a juice glass while biting the straw. His eyes were looking down at his phone. All-in-all, he looked like a well-behaved student. 

At this time, Jiang Ying’s appearance and temperament fully met the public’s perception of idols.

That is, if you looked at his appearance only. Assistant Chen knew better than that. The irascible brat definitely was up to something.

Jiang Ying used his Weibo account to like the video that the marketing account used to hack him. Then he used his laptop to sign-in into seven or eight of his trumpets, leading his fans to scold back his haters. 

“Aren’t you tired of this?” Assistant Chen carefully looked at the string of Weibo accounts that Jiang Ying was using. 

Most artists wouldn’t want to read negative comments about them, because a huge portion of those comments were baseless accusations that only aimed to make them feel bad. But Jiang Ying was built different. This person had a stable mentality, and on top of that, loved to argue, quarrel, shit-talk his way to victory against his anti-fans. He often killed a thousand enemies and hurt eight hundred of his allies18idiom; a self-destructive move – several trumpets have already been banned or deleted. 

A lot of people loved him for this. But a lot of people hated him for the same exact reason.

The company had only one requirement for Assistant Chen: don’t let Jiang Ying use his tuba19main account; I didn’t translate the slang because of this lol it’s so funny to me that they used ‘tuba’ because it’s bigger and louder than the trumpet. to quarrel with others. 

“This controversial idol enjoys this.” Jiang Ying made a crackling sound as he typed on the keyboard, and one message after another popped out at lightning speed. It seemed like his APM20action per minute was as fast as his brother’s, but he used it for… his hobby instead of e-sports.

Jiang Ying’s Trumpet 1: What’s wrong with this kind idol huh? So you think all idol deserve to be scolded by some trash like you? Do they owe you money or something? 

Jiang Ying’s Trumpet 2: Paparazzi photograph people who are worth it? Then I will call you shiteater because I think that’s what you do every day. Your word-vomit is shit, so you must eat shit too..

Jiang Ying’s Trumpet 3: Can you haters grow some braincells, please. Just one is okay, because you clearly have none. You can make shit up to dirty Jiang Ying’s reputation anytime he does something. Heck, I even see your brainless post whenever there’s an article about the pork prices going up. Should I praise your tenacity or should I pity you because you have nothing to do? Go consult a doctor already because your brain is definitely damaged. 

“What are you enjoying, little idol?” A voice came from behind Jiang Ying. Someone from behind him reached out and grabbed his right wrist, and took his hand away from the keyboard.

Jiang Ying turned his head. Standing behind him was Qi Zhu, who had just made a speech on stage not long ago.

As soon as the two of them made eye contact, Assistant Chen felt a chill down his back.

“The black suit doesn’t suit you. You look old.” Jiang Ying looked Qi Zhu up and down.

“Hoodie is not suitable for you, either. You look like someone who is trying too hard to look young.” Qi Zhu replied, expressionless as usual.

Assistant Chen, who was almost reaching his thirties, watched these two youths in their early twenties discussing the topic of pretending to be young and looking old. He silently took a step back, for fear that the flames of war would spill over and hurt him.

“Why are you looking for me?” Jiang Ying closed his laptop..

“Here, something for you.” Qi Zhu placed a large paper bag on the table in front of Jiang Ying.

“Where did you get this?” Jiang Ying became interested.

“It’s a speech gift from the organizer.” Qi Zhu said as he turned around to leave.

“You’re giving me something you don’t want?” Jiang Ying found it hard to believe Qi Zhu, “Who else did you give? It’s unusual of you to do this.”

“Yes.” Qi Zhu nodded, showing a little sympathy in his indifferent tone, “Tomorrow is the last day of February. It’s not easy for you to celebrate your birthday only once every four years.”

Jiang Ying: “…”

Jiang Ying: “You look down on people who are born in leap years?”

Qi Zhu ignored him, leaving the paper bag behind, and walked away.

“What the hell is it?” Jiang Ying was still curious.

Inside the paper bag was a stuffed penguin and a small box.

Assistant Chen looked at Jiang Ying who opened the QQ21China’s popular messaging app app, and found a person whose nickname was [Class Leader]. 

[Big-Clawed Crab]: What’s in the box?

[Class Leader]: Smart speaker, it’s called “Gossiping Classmate”.

[Big-Clawed Crab]: What can it do?

[Class Leader]: It’s Artificial Intelligence. You like to quarrel, don’t you? You can fight this thing if you have nothing else to do. 

[Big-Clawed Crab]: Oh? You’re making fun of me then?

[Class Leader]: Oh.

“Who is this [Class Leader]?” Assistant Chen looked at Jiang Ying’s phone screen from the side, inexplicably feeling that the two people’s conversation style was strangely familiar.

“Qi Zhu, duh. We used to be classmates.” Jiang Ying said, “As you can see, it is impossible for us to star in a drama together. Our relationship is really bad.”

Judging from the conversation just now, Jiang Ying was aggressive, while Qi Zhu was obviously not happy to talk to Jiang Ying.

Assistant Chen didn’t know and didn’t dare to comment on the two’s relationship status. But when he turned his head just now, he saw a giant ship22in QQ, this logo means this person is the one who you chat with the most logo… next to the [Class Leader] name. [.]

I have the time of my life embellishing Jiang Ying’s colorful insult btw. He really was of a different breed. Also sorry for the 22 footnotes orz

If you can, please support me by donating on my ko-fi~ For every 2 ko-fis, I’ll release an additional chapter ^^

1happy ending2trending topic3black = bad/infamous, red = good/famous. Both in the same sentence means controversial4anonymous side account5bashing/flaming6the hanzi is 剪影, “影” is the same as “Ying” in Jiang Ying.7position in entertainment industry; if a text says “big coffee” it means they’re a big-name celebrity.8internet famous celeb9get into scandals/netizens bashing you/etc10a note on this: it’s actually “partner” but they’re already married. It’s not brother-in-law because there’s no specific word for “older brother’s husband” in Chinese.11anti-fans12JY actually told the paparazzi’s mom to die, but in an euphemistic way, so I also try to soften the language.13a fan-only forum on Weibo14endulge in gossip15it’s Jiang Ying’s Weibo username. KANI is crab in Japanese16neutral netizens17award-winning actor18idiom; a self-destructive move19main account; I didn’t translate the slang because of this lol it’s so funny to me that they used ‘tuba’ because it’s bigger and louder than the trumpet.20action per minute21China’s popular messaging app22in QQ, this logo means this person is the one who you chat with the most