A Cheat's Survival Journal

Everyone was laughing and enjoying their meals while I sat in the back row benches, watching the atmosphere. I began musing to myself, 'They really are one happy group even after suffering so much. Could I bring myself to break this happiness? For what? My own selfishness of wanting to be a leader of a group that will conquer a state and any settlement that we may find within it?' I knew the answer to the question but I didn't know whether or not to accept the answer.

My reunion with Rick was very touching for him and that somehow made me feel touched as well. Many would call me a sociopath, but even a sociopath has feelings underneath the immense apathy that plagues them. I'm struggling to choose between friends and family or solitude and freedom. They will hold me back in terms of their moral compass and beliefs, but I'll have them to save my mind from the corruption and disconnection that comes with solitude. What scares me about choosing them over solitude is how they will react when they find out I have to eat humans to live. I don't regret choosing to be a ghoul since as long as I don't use my kagune a lot, I can go without eating for a month.

I sighed and checked my status, it surprisingly changed over the past year even though I don't have any forms of experience and levels.

[Name: Jin

Race: Ghoul, Infected(5%) //RC-Cells are killing off the virus.

Z-Points: 45,900

Strength: 8

Agility: 6

Constitution: 5

Intelligence: 8

Vitality: 11

Abilities: Customization Manipulation, Weapon Manipulation, Absolute Combat, Perfect Eidetic Memory, Rinkaku Kagune

Skills: I'm Never Never Gonna Give Ya' Up]

It was a small increase but the longer I give, the stronger I'll become I suppose. I didn't mind the small and steady increase in stats but I did mind the second race, "Infected." While I was traveling with Beth and Noah on my shoulders, my ankle hit a crawler's teeth and split apart its head from the jaw. It hurt at first and when I checked my ankle, it seemed fine and completely normal. I assume that I regenerated from the wound from it. Well at least now I know that I can survive a zombie bite in the case that I get bit again.

While I was lost in my own thoughts about my internal struggle, getting bit, and laughing that luck can beat absolute combat after I finished thinking about how I'll survive a few zombie bites; Rick came over with a plate of food and nudged me before saying, "Here, you gotta eat to keep your strength." I looked up to him and said meekly, "It's fine. It'll only get thrown back up..." I said the later part silently to myself, Rick didn't hear it and insisted by saying, "Come on, eat. There's no need to be a stranger since after all, you help along with the others save me in Atlanta."

I gave Rick a hallow smile before taking the food. Rick sat down next to me and asked, "So why are you back here being a loner?" I was staring at the food and said absent minded, "Because I don't think this group will accept me." Quickly realized what I said, my jaw dropped while Rick laughed at me for unintentionally giving that answer. Rick calmed down and said while wiping a tear from the corner of his eye from laughing, "No matter what you've done to think that. I'm sure they will accept you for who you are." Rick smiled at me before patting my shoulder to reassure me, going back to the front of the church with everyone else.

Abraham began a toast, saying, "I look around this room, and I see survivors. Each and every one of you has earned that title. To the survivors!" Everyone except for Beth, Noah, and I, cheered and applauded while saying, "Survivors!" Noah was a bit uncomfortable due to not knowing many of the people here. Beth reunited Maggie and didn't care for the toast, just wanting to spend more time with Maggie. I, myself, didn't care for the toast since I knew I was a survivor but much less than the ones here. I survived using manipulation while the others, including Noah at the start before he was grabbed by the officers at Grady, survived through their determination and wit.

Abraham continued, striking while the iron was hot and said, "Is that all you want to be?" Catching everyone's attention, "Wake up in the morning, fight the undead pricks, forage for food, go to sleep at night with two eyes open, rinse and repeat? 'Cause you can do that. I mean, you got the strength. You got the skill... Thing is, for you people, for what you can do, that's just surrender. Now, we get Eugene to Washington and he will make the dead die and the living will have this world again. And that is not a bad takeaway for a little road trip." I suppressed a chuckle and after a period of silence, Abraham asked Eugene, "Eugene, what's in DC?" Eugene stopped eating his food and said, "Infrastructure constructed to withstand pandemics even of this fubar magnitude. That means food, fuel, refuge. Restart."

I sighed and interrupted Abraham before he could continue his spiel, "It has been about a year since the apocalypse has begun. DC has already fallen, including those infrastructures. By now food, fuel, and refuge has surely been depleted from survivors who had the same idea. If Eugene, a spineless scientist, who probably couldn't of get fundings from his superior for experiments due to being spineless; knows the cure to get rid of the undead, why didn't the many geniuses across the globe find one?" I took a deep breath and said with absolute certainty, "That place wouldn't of lasted long. I'm sure with the expected population there, that place has fallen due to their greed since the people who arrived lived in luxury before shit hit the fan. When they find out that they can't receive their luxury, what do you think will happen?"

Everyone sat in silence for a moment before Abraham shouted at me with Rosita backing him up, "Eugene has the cure and that place is standing, this is America, a strong nation!" "Exactly! Who are you anyway?!" Eugene sat in silence and began to struggle between whether or not to come clean since this is the perfect chance to confess. I laughed and said, "I'm Jin, my actual name? I don't need it. America is a strong nation, you say? I hate to say it but they bombed the patients of Grady Memorial Hospital without checking a single patient's condition. I would have to say it's a spineless move. Of course, that wasn't the only hospital to receive mass execution. Many others suffered the same fate, I would have to say Rick is one of the only survivors of the mass executions that I know of besides an old man at Grady."

Abraham went silent and Rosita wanted to continue to argue but Eugene signaled for her to stop. Eugene got up and gave his confession, "I'm not a scientist, I don't know how to stop it. I lied! I just know things, I know I'm a good liar and that I needed to get to DC. I believed that DC had the locale for the strongest possibility of survival, but after what Jin said, I realized that it surely has already fallen." It was a long, lengthy confession with the others asking questions. After Eugene finished, Abraham punched him but then quickly subdued by the others. Abraham calmed down and sat in a corner in silence.

An awkward atmosphere lingered in the air but many didn't hate Eugene and kind of understood why he did it. Due to the awkward atmosphere, Daryl, Carol, and Bob went outside. Carol and Daryl went in a pair while Bob was alone. I sat down and began to think, 'I cut the wasted time of that party bus expedition. I wonder how things will play out now?' Rick sat down next to me and took a deep breath, we sat in silence and let the atmosphere clear up.

About an hour later, with no clear sign of the three who left, Sasha went out to look for Bob. Shortly after, Rick and Tyreese went out as well. While they were out, Noah came over to me and we began to chat a bit, cracking a few jokes including inside jokes. Our laughs brought back a lot of people from their thoughts, seeing that you can still enjoy life even with the rinse and repeat that Abraham mentioned.

That didn't last long since about 10 minutes later, Rick, Sasha, and Tyreese came back and Sasha began pressing for answers from Gabriel saying, "Who's out there? Why are we being watched?" Gabriel began to confess about how he left the people of the church to die, while I rolled my eyes and waited for Glenn to spot Bob outside after his confession ended.

Thankfully it was over. With Bob was back, he began to tell what happened and told the others that Carol and Daryl drove away. Rosita, seeing that Bob was in pain, announced that there were painkillers in the med-kit. "No, save em!" Bob said hurriedly, suppressing a groan. I watched on as he showed that he was bit on his shoulder. Bob said in a low voice, "It was at the food bank." Everyone went silence from the solemness and Gabriel said that there was a sofa that Bob could rest in during his final moments.

Shortly after Tyreese came out, everyone had a tacit understand of gearing up. I had my pistols which was enough for me while everyone else began to load their weapons. Rick began a small speech, "They think they're in control. We're in here and they could be anywhere. But we know exactly where they are." Glenn added on, "Strike them before they strike us." Rick nodded and said, "That's right. They're not counting on us thinking straight." Rosita spoke up and said in a question tone, "Are we? ..I'm just making sure it's a big play." I stretched against the bench and let out a groan after a few cracks from stretching, I lazily said, "I'll just go kill them right now." I got up and began to walk out the church, much to the shock of the others. Rick was the first to react and said, "Jin, what are you doing?! You can't go out there alone!"

I stood at the two doors of the church and made my choice, I'll show them what I am with a few lies and see if they'll accept me for it. My kakugan appeared in both of my eyes and I looked back at Rick, "I can and I will, you said this would accept me. But will they accept me if they knew I have to eat humans to stay alive? I can eat a small amount of walkers but not a lot. My cells wouldn't be able to fight the infection off fast enough. Hopefully, after this you all might accept me for what I am. An artificially made person with the intent of overcoming the limitations of man, resulting with mother nature fighting back." Everyone, including Sasha who just came from Bob's side, were shocked.

I walked out and faked going into the forest, I knew they were lurking by the main road. Seeing that someone came out alone, they will try to capture me as a hostage. Getting inside the forest, I climbed the trees and waited for them to come. It was almost their entire group, minus three of their members which including Gareth. I used my weapon manipulation to create a grenade as I waited for them to arrive below me. I patiently waited as I breathed steadily and calmly, hunting the hunters.

When they arrive right below me, they looked around trying to find my trail that vanished. Cooking the grenade, I dropped it before doing a dive towards the road.

Rolling on the rough, forest terrain, I came to a stop and laid down. Immediately after the grenade went off, creating a loud explosion that made both Rick and Gareth's groups aware that someone is dead. I rolled and used the force to get up on my feet, running towards the 3 scents that I smell just ahead. Pulling out my pistols, I fired 3 shots. Two bullets went towards Gareth's goons and the last went to Gareth's fingers by the trigger. Gareth was someone who gave up immediately after loosing control, that along with his lack of pain tolerance caused him to go to the ground while covering his fingers while looking towards the forest; wanting to know what monster did this to him and his group.

Walking out calmly, I arrived in front of Gareth and said, "I know how it feels to be hungry, it's agonizing, right?" Gareth, gritting his teeth in pain, said, "If you know, then why are you with them? I can tell that you, yourself has eaten a human being." I sighed and said, "Because I want to know whether or not that they'll accept me. I told them not too long ago, now I wonder how they'll react when I come back with the information soaked in." Bringing forth my kagune, I used 2 of my 8 tails to pick up Gareth and restrain him before walking back to the church.

When I arrived, the group had their guns out and I was expecting them to shoot me down but surprisingly they didn't. Once they saw Gareth captured and my tails restraining him, they understood that they were all dead except for Gareth. I stared the group down and they stared me down, it lasted like for a moment before I broke it off. I looked towards Sasha and asked, "Do you want me to eat him or do you want to execute him yourself?" She was startled when I asked her and she took a moment to give an answer, "You eating him, would be a much more brutal execution." I nodded and brought Gareth towards me before saying, "I'm pretty hungry, so you'll be my month's dinner." After that, I began to eat him alive while he screamed and cursed at both me and Rick's group. No, MY group! It seems that they decided to accept me, probably at the cost of some rules.

When I finished eating Gareth, not a single thing was left except for the blood that stained the ground and my robe. I looked towards the group and said, "It seems like you all accept me." Some were still uncomfortable but that can change in time since they already decided to let me in. I wasn't expecting them to do something so cheesy though, "Welcome to the group, Jin!" They all said that at the same time.

I laughed and said, "That's pretty cringe, ya' know?"

{

MommyGF: Aww, that's nice. Make sure to brush your teeth, sweetie, alright? *Mommy GF has donated a tooth brush and tooth paste!*

RighteousHero: Such friendship!

DevourerOfWorldsSeekerOfTruth: ..You deserve this for the entertainment that you've provided me. *DevourerOfWorldsSeekerOfTruth has donated a vial of his Nine Headed Nightmare Hydra Bloodline and a meditation manual!*

}