Amidst A War Of Heroes, Shall A Witch Crash The Party

The call of the conquering king rang out through the night air, "Heroic Spirits invited by the Holy Grail, gather here at this moment! For those cowards that fear to show their faces, spare yourself the humiliation that Alexander, King of Conquerors, would deal to you. Prepare yourself!"

To those already gathered, such a declaration only further solidified the theory that the heroic spirit of the cavalry was an utter lunatic. To say anything of the sort would be unthinkable for the honorable knight of Fiana or the chivalrous girl king of old Briton. Pitiably for the two of them, they were as Alice at the tea party, bastions of sanity called to a banquet of mad people.

Still, whatever one might say about Rider's announcement, one cannot claim it didn't get results. For in front of all gathered there in the warehouse district, a man dressed in armor of radiant gold materialized upon a nearby streetlight. "Hmph, to think there would be fools deluded enough to declare themselves kings in my presence. It truly disgusts me to see the madness that has pervaded the hearts of men across the span of history, that there would be anyone under the Heaven's to think themselves fit to rule after my death."

The golden spirit, presumably Archer based on his armor and his capability of reasoning, held himself with an unmistakable aura of disdain mixed with murderous intent.

However, while such an attitude might put off most, the King of Conquerors was nothing if not an unflappable fellow. "My, such talk would paint you as an ancient hero indeed. Are you perhaps from the Age of the Gods? Or perhaps you are even older than that... Surely a spirit who considers himself of such high caliber would not remain anonymous while the rest of us have laid their names bare?"

The golden spirit considered this a moment, then let out a long-suffering sigh. "I suppose it is the king's duty to show the plebians their place in the world."

Archer raised his arms to the sky and golden ripples opened up and from those ripples multiple Noble Phantasms came, ignoring the telepathic pleadings of his Master to stop, "Cower in awe mongrels, for you stand before the mighty Gilgamesh, lord of Uruk. I who am the absolute king of all heroes, I who am the standard to which all myths were held, and I who am the origin of all things beautiful in this world. Tremble before me as you would to the gods themselves!"

In the face of such a bold declaration, most were left silent. The exception was, unsurprisingly, Alexander, who burst into laughter in the face of Gilgamesh's theatrics. From a hidden position atop a nearby roof, the mage sniper Emiya Kiritsugu considered shooting the master of Lancer under the cover of the golden King of Heroes inevitable retaliation. However, before Gilgamesh could fire off a rain of Noble Phantasms at the laughing Rider and his sniveling Master, a new voice attracted the attention of all.

???: "Oh? The King of Uruk? Someone who ruled a mere city-state at the dawn of history thinks to claim absolute superiority? Aren't you just a barbarian who can't adapt to the modern era? Well, one supposes you could say the same of the King of Knights and King of Conquerors, but they at least don't go prancing around declaring the entire rest of history invalid. Ehahaha!"

Without even looking first, Gilgamesh simply fired off a full volley of his treasures from the Gate of Babylon in the direction of the voice. The deadly rain of Noble Phantasms that had silenced assassin flew into the waters of Fuyuki river, but the lazily aimed volley completely missed a speck of gold that floated there. Closer observation revealed to all present that said golden speck was a golden butterfly. To any aficionados of the murder mystery genre, the insect would practically be the same as a declaration of identity, but alas, aside from Waver Velvet, none gathered had even read any Conan Doyle, never mind any Toya Hachijo.

Regardless of the observer's interpretation, there remained only a single truth. The golden butterfly, unmolested by the attack of Gilgamesh, now began to multiply into a vast swarm, which parted to reveal the floating form of their master.

???: "Greetings to one and all, from me, the Servant Caster. I do hope that nobody minds my taking up the King of Conqueror's invitation?"

The witch took a small puff of her pipe and then added, with a mocking undertone, "well except for the barbarian king of course. I don't much care what he thinks."

Having said such a thing, the Golden Witch soared up higher into the air, avoiding another round of attacks by the Golden Archer. "Oooh, so responsive, almost as fun to tease as my last opponent. Ahaha!"

The witch's cackling drowned out the frustrated growl of the ancient Heroic Spirit.

As the other gathered Servants (including the supposedly dead Assassin, perched on a nearby crane) and their respective masters observed Archer's failed attempts to skewer the dancing Caster, one other party remained hidden in the shadows of a nearby warehouse, debating to himself. The twisted form of Matou Kariya, torn apart by the family's magic, had been about to send out the final Servant, Berserker, to attack the golden Servant of his enemy Tokiomi Tohsaka, but Caster's appearance had, at the very least, temporarily stayed his hand as he considered the ramifications of releasing the raging black knight in front of literally ALL the other conflicting parties.

Gilgamesh, for his part, was getting quite tired of not hitting his target and yelled. "WHY DO YOU NOT JUST LAY BACK AND ACCEPT YOUR PUNISHMENT WENCH?!"

Shockingly, Caster immediately ceased moving at the Golden King's word. For a moment, she held a completely blank expression, confusing both Archer and the audience. Twas only for a moment though, as her face was once again split into a gigantic grin, "But my dear King of Heroes, we've barely known each other for a few minutes, it's far too early for /that/ kind of play."

One could hear the crickets chirping if one listened hard enough.

Gilgamesh: "...Okay, that's enough."

Gilgamesh snapped his fingers, and this time a much larger amount of Noble Phantasm's appeared. To be precise, a rough 400 in number materialized behind the King of Uruk. A shrill scream rang out at the sight of this, though fortunately, Alexander knocked out his master before any ears were too badly hurt.

In Kariya's hiding place, a decision was made.

Kariya: "I only get but so many chances to attack, I can't miss this one. BERSERKER KILL THEM ALL!"