Amidst A War Of Heroes, Shall A Witch Crash The Party

Facing the pleading eyes of Irisviel(eyes that nobody can say no to), the mocking eyes of Caster and an extremely comfortable looking chair, the King of Knights was utterly helpless. Sighing, she took the offered chair and slumped into it. Such behavior wasn't really befitting a knight, but the night had been exhausting and confusing, so she allowed herself a to be somewhat lax.

"There now, isn't that much better?" said the eternally mocking voice of Caster. "Now then, what tea would you like oh Knight of the Sword?"

Saber: "...I'm not familiar with tea I'm afraid, just... whatever you have."

Caster: "A nice bit of Earl Gray then. And for you Irisviel?"

Irisviel: "Oh I'll have the same if you please."

"Excellent!" The witch exclaimed, then clapped her hands. "Ronove!"

There was a flash of golden light, heralding the appearance both of even more of Caster's vast horde of insect familiars, and of a strange man in a suit (which bore the same gold wing crest as Caster's dress) and monocle. Since he gave off no killing intent, Saber didn't draw her weapon, but both she and Irisviel were nonetheless surprised by the appearance of a person with such a... fishy aroma. He seemed to be almost an 8th Servant. (Not that there are only 7 servants...)

"At your command, I appear milady. And might I say that it's a p.l.e.a.s.u.r.e to be working again. I thought I'd have to wait for another summoner for 1000 years in hell," said the man, apparently some sort of summoned butler.

Caster: "Oh spare the formalities Ronove, just get my friends here some Earl Gray."

As the butler began to make more tea using the same sort of strange magic the witch herself used, Caster introduced him properly. "Lady Pendragon and Lady Irisviel, this is Marquis Ronove, the 32nd Great Demon of the 72 pillars, and my head furniture. He's something of a prized possession, as, among witches, employment of him is considered a sign of status and power. Also, he makes cookies. Delicious cookies. I only let him bake for myself, my teacher, and my best friend though, so I'm afraid you'll not see that."

On that note, Ronove sat the cups in front of the two guests and, with a final bow to Beatrice, vanished.

"So you admit to consorting with demons?" growled Saber.

Saber: "Your crimes pile up higher and higher, witch. It is only for my respect to Irisviel that I don't cut you down right here."

Caster replied with another one of her strange giggles and said, "I'm sorry, I don't speak c.h.e.s.t-beating, I'm not a gorilla. Anyway so what if he's a demon? He's a butler, I think the most demonic thing he's ever done is make a cup of tea somewhat bitter. Which, if he did here, doesn't seem to have stopped you from drinking it."

Saber raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about, I hav-"

the heroic spirit stopped, realizing something strange. She was holding the teacup. It was empty. Her mind raced at this new phenomenon. Enchantment? No, impossible, as a Saber Servant and the scion of the Dragons no magic should be that strong. It can only be...

"My!" chirped the homunculus, who'd decided to simply ignore her two tablemates' argument since she'd found both rather pleasant and didn't want to take sides outside the battlefield.

Irisviel said with a smile: "This tea is fantastic! I thought Miss Caster's was lovely, but Mr. Ronove's was so good I drank it without even realizing it!"

Caster: "Yes, that often happens to first-timers, it is always over too quickly for them. The more times you try the Ronove Experience, the longer you last, and the more you get to savor the myriad flavors."

The witch's tone was rather serious for once, apparently considering this sage advice. "Anyway, that's not why I'm here. What I want to know is why exactly you want the Holy Grail. Starting with the Servant I think. So King of Knights?"

Saber put down the empty teacup, eyeballing it warily, then responded. "Considering you've refused to even name yourself, I don't see why I should have to answer such a personal question."

Caster's face turned decidedly sour at this, but for once found no counterargument. "Very well then. And you Irisviel?"

The homunculus put down her empty cup and closed her eyes, mulling over things in her head. She leaned back into her chair and finally said, "My wish is the wish of my dear husband. I want a world without violence so that our daughter can live without worries, and so my husband can finally rest."

Opening her eyes again, she then turned the witch's question around. "And what about you Caster? What's your wish?"

Saber and Irisviel were rather surprised to notice that the witch's face was painted with a genuine smile for once. "Much the same actually. I wish to turn Earth into the Golden Land, the paradise for all souls, living and dead. Essentially the same goal as yours. Perhaps we don't have to be opponents after all!"

The witch glanced up at the sky and then said, "Well this has been a rather pleasantly informative conversation ladies, but I'm afraid I'll have to go. There are other things to attend to this night, and I just can't put them off much longer. Ciao!"

With a final farewell, the witch instantly vanished into a cloud of butterflies, which scattered everywhere. The only ones remaining were Saber and Irisviel, still seated and staring at the spot Caster once occupied.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

A golden boot impacted with a trashcan, sending it flying down the empty night street. "Damn that cowardly Tokiomi!" cursed the boot's owner, the Archer class Servant called Gilgamesh. "Who does that wretched human think he is, interrupting the king's divine punishment?"

The golden Servant took a swig from his private wine stock, venting his frustration with his summoner's caution and the limits placed upon Servants that prevented him from punishing said summoner. Normally such behavior on his part would be unacceptable, however, it seemed this war was filled with mongrels who excelled at riling him.

It was while pondering about such irritations that his superior senses as both Heroic Spirit and King of the Beginning heard a strange sound. On a typical day, Gilgamesh would pay no attention to such a thing, but this sound seemed oddly familiar. It was almost like... the sound of pitched battle. Dispelling the summoned bottle of wine, Gilgamesh jumped on top of a nearby roof and tried taking advantage of the tracking abilities afforded to him by the 'Archer' class. It was this further examination that led him to a new conclusion.

Gilgamesh said to himself: "No... not battle. A slaughter. One of the other combatants harvesting souls perhaps?"

Gilgamesh identified the source of the disturbance and it was a building fairly close by, one of the dwelling places of those who thought themselves wealthy in this era. The King of Heroes wore a true smile for the first time that night, "Perhaps this night shall entertain me yet."

Checking their mental connection to confirm that Tokiomi had gone to sleep and would not disturb his fun, the man called the King of Heroes shot off into the night.