Counterattack Into a Male God

"Have you heard of the story of breaking your promises and getting fat?"

"Brother, do you mean the story of breaking your words and getting fat?"

The little girl glanced at the fat boss who was in a drowsy state after a cup of special light yellow drink, and was constantly ‘oily’. She breathed a sigh of relief and couldn’t help telling the story of ‘fatigue after eating your words’.

"It is said that in the Spring and Autumn Period, Lu Ai's doctor Meng Wubo had always spoken without faith, so Duke Lu Ai was very dissatisfied with him." As usual, there was a minister named Guo Zhong who was also present. Guo Zhong was very fat, and he was usually favored by Ai's father, so he was often jealous and humiliated by Meng Wubo.

This time Bo Meng Wu took the opportunity to toast to Aigong, and said to Guo Zhong: What did you eat so fat?

After hearing this, Lu Ai felt very disgusted, so he replied instead of Guo Zhong: There is too much to eat, but there is no fat!

The idiom "breaking one's word and getting fat" comes from this, describing that speaking does not count, does not keep promises, and only seeks to make oneself cheap. If one expresses resolutely fulfilling his promise, his words must count, that is, ‘never break one’s word’. "

"Reading" here, the little girl paused, suddenly seemed to wake up, and hurriedly asked Ji Yanzhi: "Brother, you mean my dad...impossible, my dad has integrity in business, and it is impossible to do it. The kind of things that do not believe in words, and lose their words and get fat."

"I know what kind of person my uncle is." Ji Yanzhi squatted down in front of the fat boss who was in a coma and was bleeding all the time. While feeding the fat boss a thumb-sized pill that melted in his mouth, he talked to the little girl. : "Although my uncle often fights with us, he never steals or rapes."

The little girl poured another glass of water and handed it to Ji Yanzhi: "Then...what's wrong with my dad? Being possessed by a greedy ghost?"

Ji Yanzhi took it, took a sip and replied, "Yes and no. I know why I asked you to know the story of'breaking one's word and getting fat'? It is related to the appearance of uncle, but the story of'breaking one's word and getting fat' I have heard of is not You speak so little and fresh, but with a horrible color."

The little girl's eyes widened, she felt very scared, but she was still very curious. She was looking forward to what Ji Yanzhi would say afterwards with a horrible color-the story of "Eating words and getting fat".

"In ancient times, there was a pair of childhood sweethearts and bamboo horses who grew up together. Qingmei was a well-known beauty in Shili Baxiang, and Zhuma was a poor scholar who fell in his family. At first, Qingmei liked bamboo horses, and Zhuma also liked green plums. Both parents also got married. It means that after the poor scholar's gold list is named, he will go to the Qingmei family to propose marriage.

It's just that the scholar is very unlucky. Every time he participates in the imperial examination, he is either sick and unable to participate, or sick and unable to participate. In short, after Zhuma failed to participate in the imperial examination for some reason, it was still a white man. Qingmei's heart gradually changed, and she didn't want to be with Zhuma, who was destined to suffer. Finally when Qingmei was eighteen years old, Qingmei went to beg her parents and married her to a rich man to fill the house.

Zhu Ma was not upset, and went to Qiaomei's parents to ask for an explanation, but was beaten up by Qiaomei's family instead. It didn't take long for the bamboo horse to pass away.

Before dying, the bamboo horse continued to say like a curse: "If you lose your promise and get fat, you will suffer retribution."

Upon hearing this, the little girl swallowed: "What kind of retribution? Dad like this is related to the retribution received by Qingmei."

"Yes or not. Continue to listen to me." Ji Yanzhi glanced at the fat boss lying on the ground again, and found that he was'flowing' so much oil, but he didn't seem to be thinner at all, which was a bit funny. But Ji Yanzhi stabilized, and he continued to tell the story to the younger sister:

"After Zhuma died of illness, Qingmei gradually became fat. It was the kind of fat who didn't eat anything and would grow flesh after drinking water. It didn't take long for Qingmei to gradually fatten into a ball, so fat that he couldn't even plug the doorway. At that time, died of high cholesterol."

"Dying from high cholesterol is what you said, right? In ancient times, it definitely didn't. At most, Qingmei was fat and dead, but it doesn't seem to have anything to do with my dad." The little girl was still puzzled.

Ji Yanzhi: "If it were you, you would have been a beautiful and beautiful person, cursing you before the death of the bamboo horse, you would be retributed, but it didn't take long for you to be retributed. If you were fat, would you have any grievances?"

The little girl substituted herself into the Qingmei in the story and thought carefully and realized that if she was always beautiful and loved beauty more than anything else, fat death was definitely the most unacceptable method of death, so after the death of Qingmei, a strong resentment arose. , Which led to becoming a female ghost and pestering the fat dad?

But the problem is... "My dad didn't look good when he was young. How blind is this female ghost to get his dad around? Could it be that my dad is the reincarnation of the "bamboo horse"?"

"...You have a very good brain hole. In fact, "Qingmei" should have become a female ghost, but it is not the "Qingmei" ghost who is entangled with the uncle, but it should be a funerary of the "Qingmei" female ghost."

The little girl's eyes widened, and she suddenly realized. The fat boss has a hobby of collecting, but because there is a nagging nephew in the family, he is afraid that his nagging nephew will say that his collection is not coming from the right way. He has always been secretly collecting.

Now, Ji Yanzhi said that the fat boss was “oily” because it was contaminated with the breath of a certain funerary of the green plum girl ghost. The little girl could not help but wonder if the fat boss secretly went to the antique market with her behind her back. After all, The collections at home have remained the same as before, and this is the only possibility.

Ji Yanzhi shook his head: "It wasn't encountered in the antique market, but at the post office."

The post office in the country of growing flowers is the organization with the widest coverage. It not only has postal savings that can deposit and withdraw money, but also mail parcel service. The fat boss ran to the post office to send money to the grandparents who were farming in his hometown. Not surprisingly.

After all, people who rob tombs are only working in the dark. In fact, there is a legitimate business on the surface. Naturally, they need to store flowers and postal savings that cover the widest area.

"That burial item should have been refined. The reason why I am attracted to my uncle is probably because my uncle has a solid body, so he didn't cheat!"

Ji Yanzhi thought for a while, and simply fumbled for two red ropes from his almighty backpack, and began to weave a bracelet.

The bracelet woven by Ji Yanzhi himself, the little girl wears both hands. The fat boss has been reluctant to wear a bracelet woven with red rope. It didn't matter and just let him go. As a result...

Really, there are spirits who are not afraid of death'seeing' the fat boss.

Ji Yanzhi quickly knitted the bracelet. After a while, a shiny red braided bracelet was braided. Ji Yanzhi tied a wooden bead engraved with inscriptions on the end of the bracelet. I used a fine brush to point cinnabar on the wooden beads and passed it along the lines of the inscriptions.

"Sister, put the bracelet on your uncle. I'll go out to replenish some goods."

The little girl understands that Ji Yanzhi's so-called replenishment refers to the replenishment of cinnabar, red string and talisman paper. She did not say that she was afraid of the idea of ​​cousin not going away for the time being, but rather firmly nodded, and said: "Brother, you can go with ease, I will be optimistic about Dad."

"Good boy. Wait for me to come back."

The younger sister is only 18 years old now, and has stopped reading after her second year of high school. It's not that the family has no money and doesn't want to read on, but that the little girl is really not the material of reading. It's not that the little girl is not clever, but she doesn't know why, she gets dizzy when she reads a book. The little girl tried this a few times. Knowing that she had no hope of being admitted to university, she dropped out of school and ran back to her own restaurant to help.

Anyway, the facade of the restaurant is my own, and there is a three-bedroom house on the upper floor of the restaurant. As an unmotivated girl, the little girl is Tang Xiaomei. I think this is enough. Anyway, I don’t need to eat and wear enough. How hard you struggle.

Ji Yanzhi also has this thinking of Tang Xiaomei.

However, his little sister Tang is more self-motivated because he intends to buy a second house by his own efforts. If he lives in a set by himself, he will serve as the dowry of Tang Xiaomei. He is just such a younger sister, and he is also Comrade Tang (fat). The boss) who is raised, has the obligation to provide for the old comrade Tang, and also has the obligation to guarantee that Tang Xiaomei, who is like him, is not motivated, will continue to be heartless.

Ji Yanzhi opened the rolled shutter door, put a backpack on his back and left the restaurant with a few hundred dollars. His destination is a folk shop that sells joss sticks and paper money two blocks away, so he didn't ride his beloved motorcycle, but walked on two legs.

Not long after Ji Yanzhi left, the fat boss, Comrade Tang, woke up quietly. Comrade Tang didn't know why he slept on the ground, he only knew he hadn't eaten yet.

"..." Tang Xiaomei: "You ate a roast duck and half a roast goose. You haven't eaten yet. I said, Comrade Tang, you really want to become a pig and eat your family down, right?"

Old Tang subconsciously touched his empty stomach, and under this touch he found that he was dirty and wet all over. Old Tang was stunned for a moment, and immediately bounced from the wet and slippery floor at a speed that was completely inconsistent with his figure.

"What's the matter?" Old Tang felt that he had been greatly frightened, and it was shocking to pat his chest and gasp.

Tang Xiaomei calmly entered the kitchen and took the mop out, "What can be the matter, you hit a ghost."

Old Tang: "...I didn't go anywhere today, so I went to the post office."

Little Sister Tang started to mop the floor, "Brother said, Dad, you hired a ghost at the post office. That’s not right... It doesn’t seem to be a ghost, but a spirit. Dad, you talk about you, and when you are a lot of age, you are unlucky enough for the public. To the point where it can provoke spirits. Dad, let me tell you, the bracelet I give you to wear on your wrist must be worn all the time. Besides, if you want to provoke me, I will let my brother invite ghosts to love you."

Comrade Tang noticed that he was wearing a bracelet made of two interwoven red cords on his wrist. It must have been temporarily woven by his nephew to exorcise evil spirits.

Comrade Tang’s eyes are moist, he really doesn’t need to wear this kind of bunny bracelet! But this time he hit the evil, and I guess there will be no excuse for not wearing it in the future.

"Dad, go and clean up quickly, and we will open a shop for business in a while! You know, because of your relationship, we have lost one night of business."

If Comrade Tang had a beard, he would have started blowing his beard and staring at him right now. But it's not bad now. Comrade Tang's chest, which is not much worse than a woman's, can be called the ups and downs. It can be seen that Comrade Tang has been gasping out by Tang Xiaomei's unceremonious words.

"It's only 7 o'clock, how come one night has passed?"

Old Tang groaned, but he was still helping his girl, clearing up the mess on the ground.

After cleaning, Old Tang sat down on the chair and kept fanning himself with a fan. "No, no, no, I can't do it. Girl, you can do it, let Dad eat something and drink some beer."

"You drink some boiled water first. As for whether you can eat, I have to ask brother first."

Tang Xiaomei also sat down on the side, took out her mobile phone easily, and called Ji Yanzhi. As a result, the call was quickly connected, but a series of blind tones and strange buzzing sounds that seemed to flow through the current made Tang Xiaomei tremble subconsciously, and quickly got used to the call.

"...Supper will not be sold tonight."

The rolling shutter door is half open, but the glass door inside is tightly locked. This is the habit of Tang Xiaomei. If you don't open the store, the store door will not open. Even if you close the store and leave, there is a back door, which is very convenient.

Old Tang looked at Tang Xiaomei strangely, and found that she was very nervous, and he couldn't help but feel a fatherly heart attack. He asked. "Sister, what's the matter, what do you look like."

Tang Xiaomei wiped her face and sighed when she noticed that her face was cold.

"It's all my daddy, you said you were so disobedient, and you went out without a bracelet made by brother."

Old Tang rubbed his arms, and for a moment he felt a cold wind that didn't know where it was coming from. Comrade Tang thought it was his own illusion. However, given that Tang Xiaomei was a little nervous, Tang was very wise and martial and decided not to sway her, respecting Tang Xiaomei’s day and night order to change the words that she would not sell supper tonight, anyway, he feels sorry for his nephew. Don't let my nephew go to deliver food at night.

But... "Ayan, this stinky boy fell off the sewer opening of the manhole cover, it's still awkward. He's been out for so long, so why won't he come back."

Tang Xiaomei touched the bead red string bracelet she was wearing on her wrist, and she felt courage all of a sudden. She took her cellphone, and instead of making a call, she sent a voice message to ask Ji Yanzhi whether Comrade Tang could eat something.

[I remember there is bread in the refrigerator. You ask your uncle to cut two slices and make an egg sandwich, and eat it with plain water. Uncle has just exorcated the evil spirits, so it can't be contaminated with fish for the time being. 】

【receive. I will supervise him. 】

Tang Xiaomei received her mobile phone, and happened to see Comrade Tang getting up lightly. Without thinking about it, she knew that Tang Xiaomei was about to sneak into the kitchen to steal something to eat. She immediately akimbo her hands and shouted horizontally. road.

"Dad, what are you doing!"

The chubby Comrade Tang was startled by the loud voice, and he immediately made several swings.

"What am I doing, what can I do?" Old Tang grunted: "I am starving to death. I am not allowed to save myself and find something to eat!"

"Brother gave me a message just now, saying that you can't get dirty for the time being." Tang Xiaomei shook her mobile phone: "Dad, you have to be obedient. I care about you for your own good. I am the only dad like you. If you are What happened, what should brother and I do?"

Old Tang was depressed: "What do you mean by only me as a dad, how many dads do you want to have, Little Sister Tang?"

Only then did Tang Xiaomei react to her mistake, she smiled suddenly, and pushed Old Comrade Tang into the kitchen. Although the language is wrong, the principle must be adhered to. Since Ji Yanzhi’s "savage nagging" brother said that for now, Comrade Tang should not be contaminated with meat, so when Ji Yanzhi is not there, she must supervise it. Let Comrade Tang not touch any meat except eggs.

Don't mention how Tang Xiaomei fights wits and courage with Comrade Tang. It's good to just say that Ji Yan is going out to sell disposable consumables.

When Ji Yanzhi went out with a backpack on his back, he felt that today’s weather was not right. First of all, it was too dark. Even if the weather in April is always gloomy, it is not so dark without a trace of light. The heaviness of it seems to usher in the end of the world.

Ji Yanzhi glanced around thoughtfully, and then dispelled the unreliable idea.

The pedestrians walking around looked hurried, as if he was the only one who was so leisurely. It would be too idle to study whether the sky was caused by natural or unnatural causes. To put it bluntly, as a decathlon, the takeaway boy who can even catch ghosts and exorcise evil with acupuncture, whether the weather is natural or unnatural, can't affect him.

Ji Yanzhi walked at a fast pace. After walking for about ten minutes, Ji Yanzhi crossed two streets to the funeral street, a candle paper money store that specializes in folk products. Luckily, as soon as Ji Yanzhi walked into the store, a flash of lightning fell to the door of the coffin store opposite the incense candle paper money store.

Ji Yanzhi: "..."

At this moment, he suddenly had an idea of ​​wanting to have a heart-to-heart talk with Xiao Tiandao, who is in this azimuth and world.

If he did this, he would think that he was a maker of supernatural weather!

Ji Yanzhi bypassed the piled up highs and lows **** with paper to form a house, and gold ingots and silver ingots strung with cotton thread, and walked in front of the boss who was making yellow paper with a small carving knife.

The boss is very thin and ugly, with his back bowed slightly. When he looked at people, the whites of his eyes turned out a little, and it was very scary to look at.

Ji Yanzhi didn't think it was terrible, because the boss did this because he only had cataracts.

"A dozen talisman paper, half a catty of cinnabar, and a hundred red ink ropes for me."

The boss stopped making yellow paper.

"Used up again?"

The boss's voice was dry and hoarse, but he was quite familiar, and he was obviously familiar with Ji Yanzhi.

But isn't it? As a regular customer who often visits, it is weird that the boss is not familiar with it.

Ji Yanzhi nodded, answering the boss’s question: "I often run to the crematorium village recently. Isn’t the ‘teaching tool’ used fast?"

The boss shook his head, and when he spoke again, there was a hint of a smile in his voice: "The monsters and ghosts who live there have also learned to move with the times. You are a little brother who is accustomed to your job as a takeaway."

"It's not too hard. Basically, a trip to the crematorium village will have an unexpected harvest."

Like a fox marrying a girl, the python puts himself in a pot to stew and take a bath. Ji Yanzhi saw it once when he went to the crematorium village. Like the last time he went to the village to deliver food, he met a new man The hanged ghost named Ami who stayed in, actually hung himself at the entrance of the village in order to find a flowing curly hair.

Of course Ji Yanzhi saw it. It was directly a talisman with lightning. He blew her an explosive head and roasted four pig's feet with cumin. It was free to satisfy Comrade Amei who had forgotten her mind in the ice vault of the crematorium. Wish to have flowing curly hair.

Ji Yanzhi is always willing to help ghosts like this, but isn't he very detrimental to his ‘demon-defying demons’ equipment.’ Fortunately, in addition to all kinds of ignorant monsters and ghosts, there are also special folk craftsmen in this dimensional world. With them, Ji Yanzhi doesn’t need to make his own “Demon Subduing Demon Equipment”. After all, his hands in this world are a bit heavy, so he is afraid to make too many sophisticated ones, so that the demons and ghosts will eliminate the opportunity to confess. In the world.

"All basic yellow paper?"

Ji Yanzhi nodded: "I want this, I will trouble you Lao Bai."

The old man turned his cataract eyes and began to prepare what Ji Yan wanted, "Something happened today, otherwise you won't be here to find something to buy."

"Lao Bai, you are really like this," Ji Yanzhi said with a thumbs up, and then continued: "My uncle hit an evil spirit today. I also blame me. I didn't expect that the state departments would show up blatantly."

"What kind of weird?" The old man asked curiously.

"Have you heard of the story of breaking your promises and getting fat?"

The old man froze for a moment, then half nodded and half shook his head and said: "Old Hei told you. What? Your uncle encountered the resentment Liu Chun'er, who has been looking for Zhou Sheng's reincarnation for revenge?"

"No. What I met was something she became a fine dowry."

Old man white: "...Liu Chun'er was robbed of the tomb?"

Ji Yanzhi: "Lao Bai, how did I find that you seem to be surprised? It's like Liu Chun'er shouldn't be robbed of the tomb."

"It really shouldn't. You must know that Liu Chun'er's grave is now a desert, and there are quicksands nearby. It is difficult for ordinary people to find it. Even if it is found, it will be a life of nine deaths."

"I have already got rid of the ‘bad luck’, and I’ll steam my uncle well in a few days, so remember to come and help!"

Old Baitou: "...500 yuan."

"Yo Xi, I thought you would cost 600 yuan, but I didn't expect..."

Ji Yanzhi's exaggerated ‘oh he’, showing a false impression. The old man snorted and reminded him earnestly: "I said the things you bought this time cost five hundred yuan. I didn't talk about helping your uncle'bath'."

Ji Yanzhi: "..."

Ji Yanzhi obediently took out five hundred yuan from the pocket of his clothes, and said feebly: "You really count how much money I have. I finally saved the private money!"

The old man Bai ignored Ji Yanzhi's "Ghost Cry Wolf Howling". He collected the money and signaled Ji Yanzhi to get out. Ji Yanzhi packed a hundred red ink ropes, a dozen yellow talisman paper, and half a catty of cinnabar into a backpack that looked like a treasure house, and rolled decisively.

But just as coincidentally, he had just walked out the door when a bolt of lightning struck the ground at the doorway where the coffin was sold at the opposite door.

Ji Yanzhi: "..."

The coffin seller hurriedly sneaked out of the store and found that Ji Yanzhi was looking at the ground in front of a shallow pit that had been ‘smashed’ by lightning with extremely speechless eyes. He was also speechless.

"..." The coffin seller rolled up his sleeves and decisively scolded his mother: "God, the thief of Ge Laozi, you are hacking, hacking, hacking, and hacking all day long."

Before the words fell, a bolt of lightning as thick as a bucket slammed straight down, immediately smashing the coffin boss.

Ji Yanzhi: "..."