DXD: Hard To Kill

"Let's get closer, get closer, bring it in" the man in a white outfit and a white military chief hat said as he brought the crowd closer

"Good morning, this is a fire drill and I am here to instruct you about proper fire procedure in this building" The fire warden said as the group of office workers listened in

"My associate Shiro here will be helping me with this exercise" He said as he pointed to his assistant

"Sup" the Shinigami waved as he was also dressed in a white outfit with his own fire warden cap. But in his opinion he looked more like a milkman from the old days.

"Now when you evacuate from a building, the first you're gonna wanna do is file out in a quick and orderly line" the chief continued

"BUT YOU NEED TO FIGHT THAT INSTINCT!" came the sudden yell of his silver eyed assistant

"He's correct, this is fire people and you will die if you stay calm." Confirmed the fire warden at the skeptical crowd

"A-B-S. Always be sprinting, anyone who slows down get's trampled. They deserve it" he stated as an office worker raised up his hand only to be slapped down by the crimson haired assistant

"Questions at the end" Shiro said as he eyed the crowd

"Hold the back of your hand to the knob, the hotter it is means the safer it is to open. That's just more heat that the knob is absorbing. That means there's less fire that can burn you" The warden continued as a man bobbed his head as if he was listening to the gospel

"And if a piece of your clothing is to catch on fire, what do you do?" The shinigami asked

"Haha you stop, drop and roll" an employee answered a matter of factly

"Stop, drop and wait! Last thing we need is a bunch of people rolling around on fire" The warden retorted as he chuckled at the idiot

"Now this line goes directly to the building fire marshal. That's me. In the event of a fire... do not use this phone!" The man stressed carefully

"This is your fire, don't drag me into this. I don't like fires, i'm scared of fires" he instructed

"Now if you see fire, but you don't hear an alarm do not! tell anyone. You will scare your coworkers" The warden continued as they moved to a rectangular desk

"Just go back to your desk and work quietly" The assistant added in

"Three out of ten fires go out for no good reason. Now any questions?" The warden asked as an employee began to raise his hands only to be slapped down again by the shinigami

"Questions at the end" the warden said as he nodded to his assistant

"Now that wraps up our talk for today, moving on I've had my assistant here set up several practice fires throughout the office to simulate a real fire. Any questions?" he asked as everyone saw Shiro walking out of a door with his sword on fire

"Yah what's the difference between a practice fire and a real fire?" The coworker that finally got to ask a question asked

Behind the door of the fire marshal, flames bursted out as the alarms rang.

"TO THE ELEVATOR!" yelled the shinigami

∞

"Shiro senpai, why are you dressed like that?" Shirone asked as she walked down the corridor with the rest of the peerage while the shinigami followed along still dressed in his fire warden outfit with a mustache except now he has a case of milk he carries with him.

"I just got a new outfit recently so I'm trying it out, want a glass?" the crimsonette asked as he held out a glass of milk towards the white haired nekoshou

"Excuse me" came the voice of the blue haired former exorcist "I did not have the chance to properly thank you for saving us before" Xenovia said as she bowed towards the disguised crimsonette

"Don't worry about it, You guys would have been fine even if I didn't show up." He waved it off as Shirone took the milk bottle

"Ano, Issei-senpai said you healed me before. Thankyou very much" came the voice of the blonde nun

"Oh right, that was a thing. Did you have any burn scars leftover?" the silver eyed shinigami asked

Asia shook her head "No, it's completely healed. Thank you again" She bowed

"Huh, I have this weird urge to pat your head. Issei well done on this one, she's a keeper" Shiro said as he gave a thumbs up to his student

Issei just rubbed the back of his head "Sensei it's not like that, she's more like a little sister to me" He said as the blonde nun began to put a pouting face

"By the way, I didn't really think about it until now but Shiro. If my brother is your dad, then doesn't that make you my nephew?" Rias asked joining the conversation

"Yup, Must be weird having a nephew that's literally only a year younger than you." confirmed the Shinigami

"No, if anything you would be like Millicas except more eccentric" she said making the shinigami's brow twitch

"You wouldn't be saying that if you knew how he got his new dog" the male crimsonette retorted

"Well anyway, were here." Rias said as everyone stopped infront of the door sealed with magic and some tape

"In here?" Issei asked as he looked at the chain lock on the door

"That's where the other bishop is?" Asia asked wondering why her fellow bishop was locked up

"Last night, my brother insisted I release the seal and allow the bishop to leave this area. I'm not sure why but the bishop refused the offer" Rias said as she informed the group

"So this one's literally a shut in" Issei commented

"Such a shame really, considering the child was the largest earner we had" Akeno said dissapointedly amazing Issei

"With special contracts the bishop used a computer to make them" Kiba added in

"Which means the power this bishop had must have been dangerous if it needed to be locked away" Xenovia said with awe

"I feel like I could kick this seal and it would break" Shiro commented

"Don't be ridiculous, this is a high level sp-" Rias didn't get to finish as her nephew literally destroyed the seal with a kick breaking down the door in a small explosion

∞

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH" a girly scream rang out as everyone stood dumbfounded at the shinigami's actions

"What's going on!?" came the voice again

"Yo, Mr. Shut-in were here to get you out" Shiro said as he raised a glass of system-made milk up

"Noooo, I don't want to ever leave here, the outside is too scary!" Exclaimed the feminine vampire

Breaking out of his trance Issei looked at the bishop closely

"Woah, she's just a little girl and she kind of looks like asia. Does that mean all bishops have to be pretty blondes?" Issei asked causing Kiba to laugh a little

"What's so funny?" Issei asked not understanding the joke

"The child is a boy" Rias said causing Issei to be dumbfounded

"My student, you need to get your eyes checked up" Shiro said shaking his head as if disappointed

"Everyone meet Gasper Vladi, a half vampire and half human" Rias introduced her bishop as she drew Gasper into a hug

"HOW IS HE NOT A GIRL!? OH GOD WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME!?" Issei yelled as he asked for the reason for this injustice

"You look way too hot in chick's clothes dude and if you don't go anywhere who are you even dressing for!?" Issei asked not understanding the crossdresser

"Um, for me I guess. I just think these clothes are cuter that's all" Gasper replied to the hysterical future harem king

"Don't pull that adorable BS with me! Ahhh, when I first saw you I thought it was a dream of two beautiful blonde bishops come true" Issei said as he fell to the ground disappointed

"He's all those things too you know. He's just a boy" Shirone commented blankly

"Hey Gasper, why don't you come outside with us now hmm?" Rias said as she bent down to the bishop's level

"I don't want to, please don't make me" Gasper cried shaking his head quickly

"Come on dude, let's go. You heard the lady" Issei said as he touched gasper's arm

"AHHHH" causing gasper to scream and flash light as everything stopped

"hehehheHUAHAHUAHAHAH" Gasper froze as he heard a crazy laugh

"I see.... Time stop powers check, vampire check, flamboyant..... possibly check" Shiro said causing Gasper to widen his eyes

"How can you still move!?" He cried as he pointed towards the white dressed milkman

"I see..." Shiro said as he ignored the crossdressing vampire to survey the room

"THIS MUST BE THE WORK OF AN ENEMY STAND! YOU MUST BE DIO!" the Shinigami yelled as he got into a weird pose with his milk bottles

The crossdressing vampire was more confused than scared at that moment