Him And Her - An Odd Story

HIM – INNOCENCE

It rained on Wednesday, causing Tyson's sour mood to grow even worse. We barely talked since our date… he thought as he glanced at Aya's seat, where she was diligently taking notes. I know she has to help out, but she barely even messages me… aah, I'm seriously turning into a maiden of love. Hm, when you think about it, maiden and mayday sound similar. Could there be a connection?

"Hey, everything okay with your wife?" Emma suddenly asked as the lecture ended.

"Why do you ask? And wait, she's not my wife. Don't go marrying us off before you get hitched." Tyson said.

"I didn't see you guys together once in the past three days," Emma said. "And don't start dropping foreboding flags on such a grim day."

"She has to help her mom out at work or something," Tyson said, packing his textbooks. "Foreboding? It's not like I'm raising a death flag. It's just marriage. S.e.x with one guy. Forever."

"Why don't you offer yourself to help out?" Emma said. "And what's with that tone? It's creepy. Your mood is really shitty, huh? You miss her that much?"

"What's with offer yourself? That sounds creepy. I'm not an escort," Tyson said. "My tone is perfectly fine. Maybe you should clear your ears instead of nagging mine."

"Hands off missy, he's mine!!" Aya's voice suddenly interrupted the two as Tyson nearly jumped off his seat. When he turned sideways, he saw Aya standing there, as expressionless as ever. "Ah, it didn't sound as good as I thought it'd be. Why do guys in manga always look so happy when a girl says that? It's dumb."

"… she's, uh, pretty… unique?" Emma said, smiling nervously.

"She's dumb, you don't have to sugarcoat it," Tyson said, sighing. "Common sense escapes her."

"… I-is that so?"

"What do you mean common sense escapes me?" Aya said. "It can't escape me because I never had it to begin with."

"… uh, I'm… I'll leave you two to it," Emma said, getting up and waving. "See ya'."

"Yeah, bye." Tyson said, shifting his gaze onto Aya. "Jealous?"

"No."

"Angry?"

"No."

"Bored?"

"Yeah."

"What do you want?" Tyson asked.

"Jealous?"

"What of?!"

"Angry?"

"Right now? Yeah!"

"Bored?" Aya smirked as she took his hand and pulled him up. "You look like you're bored. Come with me."

"A date?"

"You wish," she said. "We could use an extra hand at work."

"… you missed me that much?"

"Ah, on the second thought, I could ask my friend from high school to come. I hear he always had a thing for me."

"I'll come, I'll come dammit!!" Tyson exclaimed, sighing. Absolutely nothing has changed, huh? Well, it's only been four days anyway…

"Heh."

"Stop smirking. You're dampening my already dead spirits."

"You hate rain?" Aya asked.

"Yeah. You?"

"I like it."

"Well, yeah, both of you are experts at killing mood, so I'm not surprised." Tyson said, smirking.

"Stop smirking. You're making me hate you more than I already am."

"So, what do you need help with?" he asked as they left the classroom, still holding hands.

"Carrying stuff."

"… oi, do I look like someone who frequents gym?!" Tyson exclaimed. "I'll die!!"

"It's just boxes, don't get your n.i.p.p.l.es hard."

"… what the f.u.c.k does that even mean?"

"I don't know. I think I butchered a saying somewhat."

"Somewhat?! You can that 'somewhat'?! Aah, I'm glad to see you're as alien as you've always been."

"Ah, and it goes without saying, but you're forbidden from talking to my mom." she said, still expressionless.

"No way. I'm probably not gonna be paid, so the least you can give me is your embarrassing stories from mom's perspective." Tyson protested.

"Ah, that's not it. I'm just afraid you'll start hitting on her. My mom deserves better."

"… oi, shouldn't your concern be the 'hitting on' part rather than who your mom ends up with?!"

"Don't worry. I'm not a sore loser!"

"Don't say that with such a proud face!"

"Anyway, no talking to my mom," she said. "Otherwise I'm rescinding your privilege of making out with me."

"…"

"… are you seriously waging pros and cons right now?" she asked.

"Of course I am!" Tyson exclaimed. "I mean, your lips are soft, great, your tongue play could use some work but you're almost there, your breath smells nice… but on the other hand we have your mom and her endless sea of stories about young you!! I'm so conflicted! Oi, don't blush!"

"I-I'm not blushing. Go die. Hell, why are you blushing now?!"

"Shut up. I can't believe I actually commented on your tongue play. There's gotta be something wrong with me!!"

"Something?!"

"Fine, fine! I choose your tongue!"

"Oh my god!"

"I meant lips, I swear to god!" … ugh, we're being stared at… we're so being stared at… hard…

"… ugh, whatever." Aya grunted, squeezing her grip as Tyson squeezed back. Ah, she's sweating… wait, is it her or me?! How can you even tell?! Ah, no, it's me. It's totally me… "What the hell were you doing with your hand this morning?"

"… eating breakfast."

"Did you eat in the pool?"

"I hate you."

"Feeling's mutual. You got an umbrella?"

"Nope."

"Here," she handed him one as she said. "You hold it."

"That's what she said."

"…"

"Sorry… it's just… it was right there, you know?!" Tyson said as he opened up the umbrella and held it up with his free hand. Droplets of rain fell atop of it in strange rhythm, hushing all other noises surrounding the two.

"… aah, now I'm getting worried." Aya said.

"What for? Don't worry, I'll make sure to impress your mom with my wicked sense of humor!"

"… just drop dead."

"Ah, give me a kiss goodbye at least~~" she suddenly leaned over and kissed him, lifting herself up on her toes. Tyson's expression quickly grew shocked with hers remained deadpan as they continued walking.

"There, go drop dead now."

"Aah, I was so right to choose your lips." Tyson said, grinning.

"Ah, right, I haven't slept much these past few days," she said. "So I'll probably doze off in the bus. If you do anything, I'll know."

"How will you know?"

"Your blushing face will tell me." she said calmly.

"I'll put on make-up."

"You don't have to," Aya said, smiling innocently. "I'll punch you so hard not even your mother will recognize you! Best make-up ever!"

"Don't say something so horrid with such a cute face!!"

"Oh, a cute face you say?" she said, smirking.

"Ah, to be fair, all your faces are cute." Tyson said nonchalantly.

"…"

"Wow, you seriously blush over the most innocent stuff. How cute~~"

"S-stop…"

"I can't! Your cuteness is just overflowing!! Hey, don't hide your face!! Don't hide such cuteness from the world!!" … this is bad, I might actually do something while she's asleep!!

"… s-stop!! I'll kill you!" Aya said, pulling her hair down to hide her face.

"… this is making me strangely horny."

"Seriously, if you do something, I'll snip it off." her blushing expression hardened as she looked at him with dead eyes, causing shivers to run through his spine.

"… y-yes, m'am." he mumbled.

"Good boy."

"Your mood shifts really quickly," Tyson said. "Are you on your period?" even before elbow came crushing into his ribs, he had regretted what he had said. Thus, both his fragile body and mind were aching. … I should really drop dead…

HER – COOL GIRLFRIEND

He's seriously not doing anything!! Aya thought as she rested her head on Tyson's shoulder, pretending to sleep. I know I said he can't, but he's at least supposed to try, right?! Or wait, does he know I'm pretending? Ah, I just acted like a tsundere. I should be the one to drop dead…

"… you're good at holding back." she mumbled, startling Tyson.

"You were awake?!!" he exclaimed.

"Of course, you idiot! As if I could fall asleep like this!"

"W-wait, was this a test?!" Tyson exclaimed.

"Nah."

"Ah, should I have cupped a feel?"

"What's with guys and t.i.t.s anyway?" she said, sitting back up. "Do they really fascinate you that much? And don't give me that 'we've been conditioned since birth to love t.i.t.s and n.i.p.p.l.es!' lyric, or I'll shoot you."

"Wow, you sure think of a lot of ways to dispose of me. Did I do something to you in our previous lives?!" Tyson said, sighing. "Well, there's that… but, I don't know, it's like crossing a barrier, you know?"

"Crossing a barrier?" Aya asked, tilting her head.

"Yeah! You know, kissing is great and all, but when t.i.t.s get involved, it's like a whole new world!"

"… that doesn't make any sense."

"Of course it doesn't to you, you can grab them whenever you want to!" Tyson said. "For guys, it's completely different!"

"It's just a bulge of fat."

"Soft bulge of fat."

"… all fat is soft, moron." Aya said.

"Yeah, but other parts don't have n.i.p.p.l.es!"

"So it's about n.i.p.p.l.es, and not tits?"

"They're one and the same!"

"… I still don't get it," she said as she picked up his arm and put it on her c.h.e.s.t. "What's the big deal?" his jaw agape, eyes wide open, drool happily leaking out, it was truly a remarkable expression he showed her, causing her to burst out in laughter without holding back. "Ha ha ha, what's with that face?! Ha ha, oh wow, I can't believe this! Ha ha ha…"

"S-shut up!!" Tyson exclaimed as he suddenly came back to his senses, staring at the palm of his hand with wonder. "T-thanks."

"For what?"

"For the service."

"… you're not gonna say something creepy like 'I'm so gonna jack off with this hand tonight', will you?"

"Not gonna say it, but gonna do it!" he exclaimed.

"Ah… as I thought, I still don't get it," she said, sighing. "Guys are really idiots if they can get so happy over something so basic."

"Of course we are idiots!" Tyson said. "But, you know, it's worth it, being an idiot. It's really hard to explain it, but it's like a reflex, you know?"

"Shouldn't it be more like instinct?"

"Reflex, instinct, same thing, right?"

"Not even close." Aya said, expressionless. "So? You happy with just that?" she sneered.

"… don't."

"Don't want?"

"Don't get my hopes up! I'll die!" Tyson exclaimed.

"Well," Aya said, looking out the window. "There's about ten seconds before the bus stops, so go ahead." she finished, smiling.

"Really?!!"

"That's nine… eight…" Aya counted as Tyson stared at her c.h.e.s.t, his hands trembling. "Four… three… seriously, what are you doing?" she tilted her head. "One…" he grabbed them for a moment, felt them and let go. "… eh? What was that?"

"Do you really think I could leave this bus walking if I groped them for ten seconds?!!"

"Ah. So you're an early riser, huh?" she smirked as the two got up and left the bus.

"… where the hell did you even hear that expression?"

"Manga."

"… of course…"

"So, what'd you think of them?" she asked, grabbing his hand.

"Beautiful."

"Can you even say that without actually seeing them?"

"I can!! God help me I can!!"

"What's god got to do with your perverse mind?" she asked.

"… let's just drop it. You mustn't allow me to think about them anymore." Heh, you'd think he has a fever with how red he's gotten… aah, did I seriously just let him touch my t.i.t.s because I wanted to seem like a cool girlfriend? I'm so desperate…

"Fine," she said, smiling. "By the way, I shave triangularly."

"Shave what?"

"Heh."

"PLEASE STOP!!!"