Office Diaries

"It's not true? But it is," Alex insisted as he studied her face. "You still don't believe a rake like me could transform – but you know what? Maybe you're right," he continued and his smile vanished when Ash turned to him again.

"Last week, when you asked me to go out with my friends, those friends challenged me into something," he said softly. "There was this beauty at the bar we went to you see, and she was a legend there. They're trying to see who could win the beauty's heart and her bed – sounds so familiar don't you think?"

He let out a pathetic laugh and he watched as Ashley's fists clenched on her l.a.p. Her face crumpled as she started crying again.

"They call this beauty Amethyst Eyes. She had this pair of huge violet eyes which drew everyone who saw them."

Upon hearing the color, Ash looked up in confusion.

"V-violet eyes?" she asked, her lips trembling.

"That's right. She has pretty eyes – not to mention that she was cool and aloof to everyone in that bar," Alex said as he mentioned the name of the said bar and her eyes widened.

"T-that place…"

"I spent that night watching her - considered hitting on her. The feeling I had when I saw her was the same one I had when I first saw you," Alex continued. "I had no plans on accepting the challenge. But you see, seeing her there brought back old feelings – feelings I had forgotten since they were buried by my apprehension – my frustrations over how you seem not to care about me."

Ash bit her lower lip as more tears from her eyes. She felt regret washing over her in huge waves. She was a fool.

"When I met you, I vowed I would change. I've never been in love before and I knew you don't trust me because of my record. But I did my best. I stayed with you as much as possible. Whenever I go on trips I take you with me if I can. I followed your every wish so you would see how sincere I am to you. But those things were useless, right? I still failed to have your heart completely."

It was true. Alex had always tried his best to always be with her to prove his loyalty.

"I thought before we get married it would be nice to make you say you love me too. But I guess it's not possible. Do you have any idea how it hurts when I try my best to show you how you've become my world and it still didn't… didn't matter to you?"

Alex's voice broke at the end of his words, and it broke her heart further.

"It's not true. I care about you – I love you…" Ash stood up and tried to go to Alex but her legs were too weak to move. "I just didn't want to show you how much because I fear you would get tired of me. I'm scared I wasn't enough," she sobbed as she collapsed on the floor, not caring how she looked anymore.

"I pushed you to meet with your friends because I didn't want you to think that I'm trying to monopolize you – though the opposite's just the truth. I want you – I love so much I only want you to be with me. I don't want to share you with anyone else. See now? I don't tell you my thoughts – I don't tell you about my feelings because they're very ugly!"

Ashley was originally a bit clingy. Each time she felt like monopolizing Alex's time she felt so ugly.

Alex's eyes were wide with the revelations. "Ash…" he whispered as he came to his fiancée's side, scooping her up, assisting her back to the couch where he held her tight.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't show you how I feel because didn't want you to get tired of me or hate me. I didn't want you to hate me," she sobbed over and over again, her huge eyes pleading and Alex planted kisses all over her face as he too cried. "I love you Alex. I don't want anyone to take you away from me…"

He inhaled sharply. His c.h.e.s.t felt the overwhelming warm emotions that came after hearing the words he'd been waiting for so long to hear from her.

"Honey," Alex called once more, feeling emotions akin to happiness in spite of the hurt he had earlier.

Ashley told him she loved him. Finally! It was enough.

"I'm sorry, honey. I'm sorry, honey," he crooned as he held the most precious person in his arms. "I could never get tired of you or hate you. I love you so much. I love you so much…"

They held each other with Alex rocking her soothingly until both of them calmed down. They didn't know how long they lasted like that, but the two of them were finally smiling again.

=====

"Tonight is your stag party," Ashley stated with one brow raised at her fiancé.

The two of them were in the living room where she sat on the sofa while Alex used her l.a.p as his pillow. They just got home from the restaurant where they met his parents for the umpteenth time to discuss the final, final, final, final details of their wedding tomorrow.

"So it is," Alex answered noncommittally as he closed his eyes.

He felt so tired even though he didn't do anything else aside from sitting and groping his fiancée under the table while his mother drove them crazy. His mother had overdone herself. She'd totally win first prize for paranoid of the year. It was a good thing Ash was able to soothe her as he already gave up.

"You don't sound excited," she commented as she pulled his nose, and Alex sat up in protest.

"Ouch!"

With a sheepish smile, Ash searched his handsome face. Tomorrow, this man would be her lawfully wedded husband and she couldn't wait.

"Do you think mom would keep her promise and not freak out anymore? I mean tomorrow's the wedding right? There shouldn't be any more changes," she wondered which made Alex snort.

"If I were dad, I'd tie her up in the bedroom and gag her so she'd stop complaining about everything not being ready. Would you believe it? I lost count on how many times we studied table cloth patterns, china patterns, flowers, souvenirs and so on," he continued on comically and Ash playfully slapped his shoulder as she laughed.

"Don't be like that. Your mom just wanted everything to be perfect for our wedding," she said and Alex sighed in resignation.

"Oh well, just promise me when mom volunteers to take over preparations on our wedding anniversaries, say no."

Alex mentioning their future anniversaries made Ashley's heart aflutter, totally pleased that her fiancé was already looking ahead to their future together. After their talk yesterday, she realized that the problem really was with her.

When they started going out, she had thought she'd be the one to carry their relationship since she's more m.a.t.u.r.e than her playful lover. But what happened was that since she'd already prepared for the worst thing that may happen to them, she hadn't realized that she had been stuck in one place. The thought that something bad would happen prevented her from growing with the relationship, while Alex, as time passed by had shed his old self and became more m.a.t.u.r.e and responsible for the sake of their togetherness.

Because of her own fears and insecurities, she had been blind to see the effort her lover was putting in their relationship. If Alex hadn't m.a.t.u.r.ed much – if he hadn't loved her as much as he had, she was sure their relationship would have ended a long time ago – and it would be her fault.

After yesterday's revelations, she had finally let down her guard and acted freely, affectionately towards her husband-to-be which the latter reciprocated equally if not more. Ash was truly lucky.

Now, there was only one little thing that hadn't been settled yet – and Ash was determined to end it.

Amethyst Eyes.

Just the nickname of the said legend was enough to ruffle her feathers. How dare Alex's friends drag him to their sick game? The wife-to-be would love to give them a piece of her mind.

"I feel tired," Alex complained like a child as he tried to lie back down on her l.a.p, but she stopped him.

"You can't go to sleep yet. Your friends are waiting for you," she reminded him and he frowned.

"I can just cancel," he said, his lips settling into a stubborn pout but Ash shook her head towards him.

"You go and settle your bet. You don't want your friends to think you're backing out, right?" she challenged and Alex's eyes widened.

"You want me to win the bet?" he asked in disbelief as both of them knew what winning entailed.

Alex would continue the affair with the legendary beauty. "A-are you sure?" he asked and she nodded, her lips set into a grim line. Her hazel eyes burned with determination.

"Veni, Vidi, Vici," Ashley recited. "That's your motto, right? Win the bet," she softly ordered and Alex shrugged.

"If you say so…"

=====

In the midst of a dreamy place, with its classy interior, the low-keyed chattering of patrons, and seductive music she sat. Quietly, at the end of the bar, on the farthest seat which she usually occupied, she nursed her second glass of foreign whiskey. The bitter spirit calmed her own weary soul as she listened to an old familiar song.

"And the sky was made of amethyst, And all the stars look just like little fish.

You should learn when to go. You should learn how to say "no,"

Might last a day, yeah, Minus forever.

Might last a day, yeah, Well, minus forever…"

As the singer crooned her song with the title akin to the hue of her eyes, the amber liquid she nursed worked their way down her throat, drawing a line of fire, burning and yet refreshing at the same time. A nostalgic smile played on her seductive lips as she remembered the same thing happening before.

Like a déjà vu, the master placed a third glass of expensive whiskey she favored in front of her without her ordering it. Knowing where it came from however made her smile widen as she felt the familiar electrifying presence behind her.

"Have you been waiting long?" the seductive baritone whispered against her ear, the hot breath of her lover fanning against her skin, sending delicious shivers down her spine.

Slowly, deliberately, she turned around to face the owner of the voice as she crossed her legs. "Not really," she answered as she smiled, her amethyst eyes twinkling with their secret joke.

Alex Li, the man who had taken her over and over again that she lost count looked at her with smoky almond eyes. Her tongue flicked the side of her lips, anticipating the night ahead when she knew she'd be spending in bed with this gorgeous man, writhing in p.l.e.a.s.u.r.e in his arms as she cried out his name.

She thought she was so lucky that this wonderful specimen had been one of those people who had taken the challenge. Tonight was the night she would announce the winner of the bet.

Again.

This time, however, there wasn't really a competition. No, there was no competition at all.

The legendary Amethyst Eyes had been Alex's all along. 

"Honey, are you really okay to walk over there without your glasses or contact lens?" Alex asked worriedly as he assisted her from her seat.

Ashley's vision had gotten worse compared to years ago when they had first met at a bar when Alex had the same bet with his other group of friends. It was the reason why she didn't recognize him a week ago when Alex first came here and saw her.

"I'll be okay," she answered with a sigh, getting impatient to meet the people who tried to make her lover revert to his old activities.

Years ago when she just returned to Hong Kong from France, Alex had been a wild playboy who had taken the challenge of approaching Ashley at a similar bar.

"Take me to those friends of yours so I can give them a kick or two," she added which made her fiancé chuckle.

"Honey, it wasn't their fault you're too pretty," Alex stated honestly which made her smile. "In fact, it's actually your fault. Didn't I tell you to wear your hazel contact lenses all the time? Your real eyes are too potent – I hate it when people flock around you like they want to eat you up and I hate it more when they stare at your eyes," he continued with exasperation.

"But I don't wear contacts because I didn't want to see – and I had no plans on taking up conversations with anyone when I drink," Ash answered with a pout which made her more alluring under the dim lights with the brilliance reflecting in her huge magical eyes.

Years ago before she met Alex, she would go to the bar because she's tired and wanted to unwind. Lately, she went to the bar to clear her head to think or to pass time whenever Alex was away on business trips and couldn't take her.

"That's it! The next time you feel like drinking, you call me. Don't ever come back to this place anymore and don't you dare go drinking alone," Alex warned and Ash once again felt happy, her insecurities totally wiped away by her husband-to-be's show of possessiveness.

"Okay, okay," she promised as she anchored her arms on Alex's. "Now take me to those idiots you call friends…"