Oh Love Me Mistress: A Kaguya Crossover Fic

"Then what do you need to drag me here anyway?" I asked the weird uncle, Oshino meme. He leisurely spun the decrepit chair lazily and took a seat on it. The building was presumably, an abandoned cram school, with the amount of stacked chair and tables on each of the four floors.

Old newspapers and paper gather in grimes, and dust littered all over the floor. Moss and shrubs started to overrun the wall and floor, even a full-grown tree was growing on the rooftop. The location was just right on the outskirts of the city, right behind the industrial district. No wonder, the building was abandoned with how unideal the location is.

"As I said before, I want to talk and possibly negotiate," The smoke wafting leisurely on the air, coming off his mouth.

"By taking a child to an old abandoned building with a weird and suspicious uncle?" I tilted my head innocently, putting my best effort to smile.

"Jeez, don't say such mean things." He smirked in his seat, "You are really energetic, is something good happens."

"You won't imagine it. Then, what are you?" The mood shifted yet he still maintained that smirk as he playfully rolled his cigarette.

"Your start with 'what' not 'who', am I such worthless thing in your eyes?"

"Yes, particularly when someone makes me wait to go home, I'm a busy child see, I don't want my mistress and her maid to nag me when I come back."

"Don't worry, it won't take long. Back to the topic, I'm what you called as a balancer."

"Big word coming from a spellcaster."

"Well, it doesn't matter. The important thing is, I keep the peace around here, specifically on this island, in this nation, building a bridge from 'here' and 'there'."

Here and there, what is here, what is there. Is it the mundane world as here, and the moonlit world as there? or the side of humans and the reverse world?

"Both are important, Shinomiya-kun," He said, reading my mind.

"Hmm, so you're the type of people who proclaimed himself as something."

"Well, I didn't officially take this job or something. I'm the wanderer without a home, this is just my hobby."

"Whatever, so, what you want to negotiate about? Is it the matter of kiss-shot-acerola-heart-under-blade, if it's so…" I didn't continue my words, silently convey that I won't back down regarding her matter.

"You are so energetic, no, It's not about her. With her under your subservience, Kiss-shot had gone under my radar, you can see it that way. On the contrary, it's about you, Shinomiya Yuu, the so-called long-lost twin of Shinomiya Zaibatsu heir."

"You already know me, not surprising," I grunted at his piece, he claimed himself as an informant before after all.

"I have my trade-secret after all, then let's talk about you, Shinomiya-kun." He pulled the cigarette of his mouth, facing me directly.

"Cut to the chase."

"Of course, I've detected you since your recovery on that hospital. Night after night, great energy would radiate off from it, like a beacon begging to drawn over, you didn't bother to hide that energy. And that's how I know you.

You see, I've to expend great energy just to get rid of oddities that sense your power."

That explains the weird mana shift in the air when I was training to control my circuit. I should do it in a desolate place later.

"In other means, you wanted compensation of that…service."

"As expected of Shinomiya heir, your keen senses in money been amazed me. Not only that, you as an individual with great power, I wanted to propose a treaty with you."

"Treaty?"

"Yes, treaty. I'm sure you already know how typical magus behavior is." He nudged me.

"The absolute path to the root, without regarding the sacrifice and disaster it could bring. And further that, their twisted behavior, and morality."

Of course, I know it, for almost 7 years long I have to face that twisted behavior after all.

"Exactly, will you promise in a binding contract, to not to seek the path of the root. With your power, I'm sure you perhaps will achieve it someday, but the impact it could bring will be more than significant for us to bear."

"You're literally asking a magi to cut their purpose, what will you pay for it?"

"I'm aware of your situation, a homunculus won't survive for long in their fragile body. You will and seek the path to root if it could bring you to eternal life."

"What are you implying, don't test my patience. Why bothers if I will die in a few years, anyway?"

"That's what I'm afraid, human or in this case homunculus which exact copy of a human if cornered will possibly, conduct even the greatest miracles. I won't take my chances with you. Of course, I will pay my share too, I will help you to fix that body of yours."

After a brief deliberation, I stare at him in silence.

'What do you think about this, Shinobu?' I transmit my thought to her.

'Hmm, it will be amusing. Although it sounds fishy, why don't you listen to him, there won't be a harm to you if something did happen.' She said.

"No, I won't take that condition," I break the silence.

"Well, I guess so," He shrugged, "Anyway, let me raise my bargain. There are a few methods that feasible for you right now."

His finger raised.

"One, you become a dead apostle, it won't be hard and I'm sure kiss-shot will gladly do it for you." Another finger raised again.

Not possible, the draw-back is too great if I was to become a dead-apostle. Not only I will crave for mortal blood, but my mind will also be twisted, and it will cut me off from the human world.

"Two, I have a special ingredient, you see. Have you ever the tale of mermaid meat?"

I answered, "No, but I've heard it could grant you immortality."

"Right, but in exchange of immortality you will receive a great curse."

I raised my eyebrows at him.

"Everything has its price you know, it's the rule of the world after all." He waved his cigarette before raising his third finger, "And lastly, Three, have you watch the news about Fuyuki tragedy, two weeks ago."

I nodded at him.

"I'm sure you felt the wash of evil radiated from it. That is not an ordinary fire, it was the twisted amalgamation of human d.e.s.i.r.e, the all-evil-world. Even I couldn't contain the fire, and only watch it from afar." Gone his smirk, replaced with a solemnness drifting in the air.

Then he looked at me, "Every 60 years, in the land of Fuyuki, there's a ritual called the holy grail war. A tournament of 7 to get the all-wishing-device the holy grail. It was made by the three great magi houses, as a way to reach the root and attain the third magic, heaven feels. I don't need to teach you about the great 5 magic am I?"

"I know it."

"Right, and for past centuries there have been four holy grail. and the fourth holy grail war, as you guessed, happened three weeks ago, and I'm sure you know how it ends."

I c.a.r.e.s.sed my chin, "The fire, the all-evil-world was the outcome after the sole winner gets the grail or so what I guessed."

He chuckled at my response, "100 points. You see, they didn't pit a magus between magus but they called the past heroes in the container called as servants. 7 servants with the tremendous power of heroes fought a legendary battle against each other to win the grail, sounds romantic no?"

"Sadly, there lurk behind the facet of grail. I don't know the exact detail of how the all-world-evil could possess and corrupted the grail, but it did grant a wish, in a very twisted way.

For example, if you wish for world peace-"

I cut him, "Let me guess, it will exterminate all human kinds as there will be peace after that."

"Another 100 points. Ah how I wish to take you as my disciple instead."

"Fat chance, I don't want to become a NEET and homeless like you."

"You could say a lot of mean things, aren't you, Yuu-kun."

"It's in my gene after all."

"Well, with the conclusion of the grail war didn't come to finish, again. I predicted the next holy grail will be shortened, presumably in 7-10 years."

"You want me to take part in it, I could see why you will reap a great benefit from this."

"Of course, the most straight-forward, yet hardest way to fix that body of yours was to wish to the grail. You see, Grail war had been in my back for years. Not only, but they also destroy the balance by summoning dead heroes of the past, they didn't care about any collateral that could happen in their fight. There have been 4 holy grail war but none have ever been completed. And I need to make sure, in the next war, it needed to be finished once and for all."

"How about the all-world-evil inside the grail?"

"Of course, I'll back you up. Take me as a sort of sponsor, I'll cleanse the grail for you when the time comes."

"Not helping?"

"I'm a balancer, I stood in the middle-ground. I don't help, but merely lending you my strength, that's all."

Isn't that the same, I don't know how these people thinking.

"How could I take you as an ally, if you could snatch the grail away from me, and not betrayed me."

"Then that's where the contract comes from, and Grail can't be snatched from the winner anyway."

'Just take it, Master. Heaven feels is great magic, not only you would fix this body of yours, but it could unlock your potential,' Shinobu said behind my back.

"Fine, I'll agree with these terms."

After a few deliberations, we reached an agreement as a contract signed between us. If any party betrayed each other, they will receive a serious death backlash.

"With this, our contract has been established until the conclusion of the 5th holy grail war. And I would love for you to do me a favor, Yuu-kun," He said.

"What favor?"

"I need you, to exterminate an oddity inside Fuyuki. Of course, you will be rewarded with something very special."

"Aren't you the specialist here, what kind of heartless man to ask a child to kill someone anyway?" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"This kind is very specials I couldn't destroy him with my ability. But, you, I believe you will be the right man or boy in this case. And if you still hesitate, I will give you the information about the three executors that after Kiss-shot."

"Fine," I disgruntled, "Just fill me in."

"That's my boy, an energetic young boy. The target is, his name is Zouken Matou, the patriarch of Matou clan, one of the clans that held the Holy grail war. He has lived for centuries, with him dabbling in arts of very disturbing form of magecraft. He transforms himself, as a sort of host and colony of worms, that he created. You see, at this point, he is not a human anymore, but a monster, an oddity. He couldn't be killed unless all his worms are destroyed. That's why I need you to take care of it."

"Fine, I'll take a look into it. And, I expect you to deal with the backlash if I killed the patriarch of a great magi clan."

"Don't worry, I'll be on your side. They're a falling magus family anyway, won't be that hard."

"Good, just give me your contact. In case, I'll need you again."

He would be very useful, regarding his resourcefulness as an informant and middle-man.

"That's how you conduct business, here take my card." He gave me a card out of his pocket, "Just call me if you need any other things, and don't forget about that compensation," He raised his three fingers.

"3 thousand yen?"

"I'm not that cheap you know. Three hundred thousand yen, that's the price of my usual services."

"Money-mongers, child-bully," I called him.

He raised both his hand and shrugged, "What can I do, a man needs to fill and warm their bellies."

"I expect you to deal with police later for exploiting and extorting children."

"Haha, you're very energetic, Yuu-kun. That's won't be the first time, so don't worry."

After that, we part our ways, as I headed for the mansion. Ugh, now I forget about Kaguya, and Hayasaka, I lurched my stomach.

It's already past 11 anyways, I look at my wristwatch. They'll give me an earful. I hope they haven't deployed a search squad for me. I shuddered at the thought.