Painting Clovers

I've heard people talk about this moment, how everything seemed to go by in a blur, how time seemed to pass by them. But no, it didn't pass by like a blur. It was in slow motion.

Do you know the feeling of being under water? When all the sounds are distorted, everything is blurry, like there's a weight pressing on you. It's like that, it's like being underwater.

I felt every moment, every single moment. I watched as Lester picked my phone up and spoke to the person at the other line, I heard all his answers, yes, yes, what happened, where, yes, we're coming. He looked at me, went to the counter to pay our bill, and helped me get up. Lucky we were able to get a cab quickly, then we were at the hospital. It was Lester still who spoke to the reception, then he lead me to the waiting area. It was amazing how calm he is, how he handled it.

"We should let Liam know." He was holding up my phone. How does he have my phone? Did he take it from my pockets? I stared at it for minutes, then I looked up at him, he was watching me intently.

"I can do it." He was still watching me. I just nodded in response.

"You sure?"

Again, I just nodded.

He dialed Liam's number and put the phone on his ear.

"Liam, no no it's Lester. Yes. It's Lena, she's in the hospital. Well, there was an accident…" At that point Lester stood up and walked to the other side of the waiting room, thank god, I don't think I could hear it again.

There were 3 other people in the waiting room aside from me and Lester, An elderly couple sitting at the corner, and a teenage girl sitting right in front of me. She was looking at me, watching me. I looked at her and she didn't look away, didn't even bother to pretend she wasn't looking. She looks around 15 or 16 maybe, I don't know, what does teenagers even look like nowadays.

Lena, she's only nineteen, a teenager still. I've never really thought about that before. She's only had 19 years. I could feel my eyes burning. I shifted in my seat.

Lester finally sat back beside me. The girl is still watching me. I wonder what she sees.

"Liam is on his way, it's good he's still in the country." Lester held out my phone, handing it back.

I just nodded without looking at him, ignoring the phone. Maybe it would be better if he does the talking. He is much more calm than me. How is he doing this? It's funny, Lester is being responsible. In the years that we've been friends, I have always been the responsible one. I was calm and collected while he's, well, he's Lester. The carefree one, the go with the flow guy. Now, look at us. I wanted to laugh, I really did, but my body didn't want to listen.

Seriously, what is her problem? It's been almost an hour and she's still looking at me. What does she want? Does she have something to say?

"What?!" The couple at the corner jumped on their seats, Lester looked at me.

And suddenly I'm above water. I can hear properly, I can see clearly, the weight was lifted on my body and settled on my heart. I didn't realize I just shouted at the girl in front of me. Though she didn't seem to be bothered, she didn't even flinch. But finally, she looked away, slowly.

"Come on."

I looked at Lester in disbelief. "I am not going anywhere."

"Were not leaving, I just think we should get some fresh air. Liam's gonna be here in a few hours" He stood up and waited for me to do the same.

I got up and followed him to the exit, I looked back at the girl and she solemnly nodded at me. I nodded back.

It was a perfect weather still, the sky was still clear. There are birds flying high. It was bright, no cloud in the sky. How could the sky be so beautiful at a day like this? I looked up. Lester, who was standing beside me, did the same.

"You know you can talk to me whenever." His voice was soft. I wanted to laugh again, Lester being quiet.

I nodded. It seems like the only answer I could give. Of course I knew that already, but it was nice of him to let me know.

We stayed there for I don't know how long, looking up at the sky. Every now and then Lester would answer my phone and get updates from Liam.

"Do you wanna go back inside? Liam is about to enter the city. He'll probably be here in an hour." It was already dark, finally, the clear blue sky is gone, the perfect weather. On the way to the waiting room I noticed the girl from earlier in the hallway. She was talking to a nurse, nodding to what they were saying, I didn't see her face, her expression. I didn't know if she was getting good or bad news. I sent out a silent prayer for her. I hoped it was good. At least one of us should be happy.

We sat at the corner of the room . Lester handed me my phone and this time I took it, I looked at it staring at the time. 20:32. The day hasn't ended, and yet it felt like it did. It felt like all days ended. I stared at the time until the screen turned black, then I stared at my reflection. Nothing seemed to look different, it was still the same face I saw earlier in the morning when I showered. The same hair, eyes, nose, mouth, ears, same face. Nothing changed, and yet everything did. I could feel the burning in my eyes, I cleared my throat and pocketed my phone.

==

"Where is she?" I looked up and Liam was walking towards us. He's eyes were bloodshot, his hair a mess. I didn't want to look at him, I couldn't.

"Let's talk to the reception, they didn't let us see her, they needed a family member to sign for her." It was Lester who answered. Liam looked at me and back at Lester, then nodded.

We walked to the reception area, Lester leading and Liam following behind him. It felt like I was watching a drama. Like I wasn't really there, like I was an outsider watching someone else's story. Liam spoke to the person incharge and we were lead down to the basement. I could feel my heart beating in my chest, it was getting louder. I don't know if I could do this. As the elevator opened, my heart felt like it was trying to jump out of my body. We walked out into the hallway, my knees were shaking. I stared at the back of Liam's head, I noticed he doesn't seem as tall as I remember, maybe because of how he's walking. His shoulders drooped, his head hang low, it was so different from the proud , confident person I met a few weeks ago.

As we rounded the corner Liam stopped walking. I looked up and saw the door, the signage above it. Morgue.