The Bad Ending of an Otome

I always feel cowardly when I see you, and discovering this about myself makes me unhappy. 

It wouldn’t have been so bad if Ophelia and you had been madly in love and couldn’t live without each other. 

I may have felt relieved if I had let go of my greed and craving.

“Even though Ophelia is gone, you are still someone important to me.”

“…”

I chuckled bitterly. 

If I was never going to be a major character, if I couldn’t stop Ophelia’s death, I should have given up my desires sooner. 

As a result, the basis of my inferiority issue became painfully evident. 

I wished to be loved by someone other than Ophelia. 

That childhood longing, no matter how hard I tried to destroy it, never went away. 

I knew such a person could never exist, yet I thought myself vile, loathsome, and pitiful for feeling this way.

“Emil…”

“Sir Raretis is also important to me.”

His pupils dilated.

“Not as much as her, though.”

Raretis Hope had a puzzled expression on his face. 

And Ophelia was my blundering ally in this. 

She didn’t comprehend my inferiority complex, and I mocked her apathy. 

But if it hadn’t been for those imperfections, I’d never stayed by her side, and she wouldn’t have been able to change her fate of loneliness in the original game. 

We were both broken people in some way. 

Raretis Hope was my childhood hero and idol. 

That’s why reflecting on my inadequacies felt almost wicked.

Loving someone was like a razor’s edge. 

I thought all the bleeding had hardened my heart, but it turns out my emotions weren’t as tough as I imagined. 

I was afraid of exposing the darkest aspects of my heart for fear that he would despise me. 

Even though I assumed he would just pity me because he was nice, the prospect of getting his sympathy made me want to die.

“That’s why I don’t want to get deeply involved with the Windrose family, where Lady Elodie resides.”

Someone once told me that even a coward like me deserved happiness. 

That was sufficient. 

I almost had that person’s letter memorized. 

I planned to honor her final requests to the best of my ability. 

I wasn’t sure, but I planned to dress up, eat wonderful food, and go on many adventures. 

So…

“I genuinely appreciate your kindness, Sir Raretis. As a token of our prior friendship, I will accept the necklace you gave me today.”

I cracked a smile. 

Finally, I could grin sincerely, and my sense of calm was restored. 

The man appeared astonished and perplexed, which was unusual for someone like Sir Raretis.

“Emilia, I…”

“I’m small-minded and petty. Nothing I should be upset about, nor should I become involved. So this is just for my amusement.”

“Is it because of Lady Elodie?”

His voice seemed rushed, almost frantic. 

I stared at his expression. 

In disbelief, his lips curled. 

If I agreed, it would come across as terribly petty.

“Yes.”

“…”

What is the point? 

She would have approved of my petulant behavior because of her. 

After all, I know I am a petty and mean-spirited individual. 

I didn’t want to appear that way before him, either. 

But inflating and exaggerating myself simply adds to my sorrow. 

I would still be grinding coffee beans and scrubbing dusty nooks of a cafe if it weren’t for her.

“Then, you don’t mean to…”

“I have no intention of shamelessly infiltrating the Windrose family by pushing Lady Elodie out. It wouldn’t even if I wanted it to happen just for me. To be honest, what is the lady’s fault? Ironically, I should say that.”

It contradicts itself. 

Ridiculous. 

That I am aware of. 

But I can be selfish in this one area. 

Others are rooting for that lady. 

Sir Raretis, who is also without a residence, would not drive her out. 

Furthermore, the Marchioness decided to allow her to stay in the first place.

“Was there nothing important to you other than Ophelia?”

“…”

As I was about to conclude the talk and turn away, I was interrupted by an unexpected query. 

His tone was nearly hurtful. 

Is it possible? 

But that is not possible. 

How many men loathed me because they were envious of the affection ‘she’ gave me?

Even though Raretis and I grew up nearly as siblings, there was always an awkwardness between us. 

He was always so sweet. It was difficult to tell how he felt. 

Perhaps he felt neglected? 

It’s possible. 

Did he consider me a non-blood sister? 

Even a pet owner is concerned when their dog has puppies, and here I had gone without saying anything, only to return with such harsh exchanges.

Or maybe he resented me. 

Ophelia’s absence had to have left a considerable hole, and I had also left. 

The mansion is held together thanks to Elodie’s presence. 

As an outsider today, and invoking the deceased’s name, it would be inappropriate for me to challenge him furiously.

“…Yes. That was correct.”

His violet eyes twitched slightly. 

The disturbance was so obvious that it caught me off guard.

“…So, that’s why you left?”

His voice was quite low. 

My response was straightforward.

“Yes.”

“…”

Raretis closed and then reopened his eyes as if concealing some emotion. 

His violet eyes had calmed down a little.

“Then, why did you come back?”

“…”

I was speechless for a brief minute. 

Raretis stepped closer to me as he sensed my distress. 

I had always imagined him to be a peaceful individual, yet there was something like a raging violet flame coiled in his stare.

“To have my debut… celebration.”

“With Cassio Brahamdorff, whom you despised? I visited the cafe where you worked.”

“…”

“What’s the point of repeating plausible lies, even to customers? You didn’t sell the store. Did you intend to return?”

That was the original plan. 

It may be tough to return now that things have escalated… 

I debated how much information to reveal. 

Raretis is not someone I doubt. 

He is the only person who can look at ‘Ophelia’ objectively. 

In terms of trustworthiness, he is unrivaled by Cassio. 

He wouldn’t take Ophelia’s letter carelessly. 

But I hesitated because there could be a reason she insisted on having me make my debut alongside Cassio. 

That’s why I’m debating whether or not to reveal it.

“Right, you said you had ‘business’ with that man?”

“…”

“You’ve never been interested in high society. It’s hard to imagine you returned merely for the debutante party.”

True. 

Raretis Hope is no idiot. 

I may have avoided the subject at the palace, but I knew a time like this would come. 

My brief thought came to an end.

“It was her wish.”

“…What?”

Raretis appeared surprised.

“She desired that I make my debut. I learned about it a little late. That’s why I came back.”

“…”

Raretis’ expression got more complex. 

Fortunately, he did not inquire as to the source.

“Cassio Brahamdorff is…”

“I’m cooperating with him because of her, not because we have special feelings for each other.”

“…No special feelings?”

His voice was a little skeptical.

“Do you think he’d invest money in this, fill rooms with dresses, and laugh and joke in front of others just because he likes me? Sir Raretis, you are well aware. He resembles a snake. Even in death, he would not lose anything.”

“…”

He simply shut his mouth. 

There was a notable pause.

“…Anyway, I said you shouldn’t be concerned. Cassio and I are both following her desires.”

“And what happens after the debut?”

“…Pardon?”

“Is that the end?”

No. 

Because the letter is two pages long, there must be more. 

My words were swallowed. 

Raretis’ eyes glowed brightly.

“…I don’t know what happens next.”

A gentle sigh could be heard.

“…Emilia.”

“Yes.”

“You didn’t hear Ophelia’s wishes directly, did you?”

“That’s… right.”

If I had, I would have done something different instead of fleeing after her funeral.

“If everything you’re doing follows Cassio Brahamdorff’s plan?”

“…I didn’t think he’d use the name of a dead Ophelia to deceive.”

“You’re underestimating him.”

Raretis’ voice was especially crisp. 

For a little period, I blinked, feeling silly.

“Do you think Cassio Brahamdorff accidentally failed to stop Edmund Gloucester at that banquet?”

I was surprised.

“…Pardon?”

“Edmund Gloucester is our poorest swordsman. Cassio Brahamdorff, despite claiming little ability for the sword, is a powerful warrior.”

Raretis Hope has made an accurate assessment.

“Even if it was a spur-of-the-moment action, the distance between them wasn’t that far apart.”

After adulthood, most noble males are addressed as ‘Sir’ in this society. 

This practice dates back to when all nobility were vassals and knights under the king’s command. 

As a result, most noblemen consider swordsmanship training to be both an etiquette and a duty. 

Nowadays, especially in aristocratic families like the Brahamdorff, administrative and bureaucratic talents are valued more than physical prowess. 

But even so…

“So, a skilled swordsman like him couldn’t stop an amateur like Edmund?”

Is Raretis indicating that Cassio Brahamdorff purposefully let Edmund Gloucester attack me? 

Cassio, that Cassio…

“Now, you’re saying…”

“I don’t know what exactly he’s planning by using you.”

“…”

“He would never have dared to plot anything extreme involving you back when Ophelia was alive. But… we can’t presume he’ll be forever trapped in the shadow of a dead Ophelia.”

“…”

But Cassio’s anxiety appeared real at the time. 

Was his self-criticism also a lie? 

The look on his face when he noticed my injured cheek was genuine, not manufactured. 

I thought I could tell them apart… 

My thoughts grew agitated. 

Raretis grabbed my shoulders in an eager motion when he noticed my bewilderment.

“Come with me, Emilia.”