The Human Saint Is Bored, So I Was Summoned To Another World

Good morning…I guess?

Yeah, I know I say that, even though the light outside isn't changing at all; however, I decided to just count every time I sleep as a full Earth 'day'. It's really hard to measure time here, since Chersea hasn't had that standard.

Well, a-anyway, I'm having a problem as of this moment.

"What do you want?" I asked a group of maids that I caught once again inside my room.

"…" They remained silent, but all were looking back at me.

Is this some kind of a staring contest?

"If you have nothing else to say, you may get out. I'll just pretend this didn't happen." I waved my hand as a signal that I want them off, but for some reason they remained standing on their spot.

I think these girls are looking for another trouble.

"Uh…M-mister Kuro…" the maid that looks like the leader of the group finally spoke, "W-we're here to clean your room, so if it's p-possible, can you leave the place to us?"

"…" Now it's my turn to stay silent.

I think there's something fishy here. Are they going to install a listening or monitoring device inside? Well, I'm not yet sure if this world has some stuff like that but…I guess there's nothing to worry about, since I am not guilty of anything they suspect me of doing.

Yeah, watch and listen to me for all I care. You won't get anything.

"M-mister Kuro." Another maid approached me.

"What?"

"Err…Big sis wants you to the kitchen."

'Big sis'. If you didn't know yet, that's what the junior maids call the most senior servant assigned in the Kitchen Department, Jessica.

Well, whatever; I don't really give a damn.

Why did that bitch want me to come to the kitchen anyway? She must be up to no good once again.

I'm having second thoughts on leaving my room to these suspicious maids, but what the heck? It's not like they can gather any damning evidences against me…

In the end, even against my own judgment, I went to the kitchen.

There's really something going on.

"Please eat to your heart's content."

"Err…this isn't poisoned or anything, right?"

"What are you talking about?" The kitchen's boss, Jessica, retorted. Yeah, I don't like that smile; before, whenever I appear on her line of sight, she'll give me a frown, or a sharp glare. "If it is poisoned, of course I won't tell it to you."

"Puuu—" I immediately spat the little food I had in my mouth.

"That's mean!" Jessica pouted. I'm having the chills watching her cute antics, "I was only joking about the poison. Please eat in peace."

Yeah, there's something going behind my back. I mean look, before, it's either I would cook and prepare my own food or the kitchen department maids would give me scraps and leftovers. But this time, Jessica prepared a full course meal just for me, as she told me.

"Err…is my face really that weird when I eat?"

"Well, your face is indeed weird." Jessica replied, "But it's normal. Pretty much the same whether you eat or not."

"Then why are you staring at me? I'm sure it's not that nice to look upon."

"What are you saying? I like watching you."

She really hates me. Oh, but if I may say, Jessica's cooking is pretty delicious. It reminds me of that good old home cooking of my mom back on Earth. Even though she's my enemy, it wouldn't hurt if I compliment her work, is it?

"This is delicious." I commented.

"Ah, thank you!" Jessica smiled ever so sweetly, "I take pride in my cooking. They say that my talent can make any man fall for me."

For someone who's so averted with men, hearing that from you gives me horrible chills.

However, I think I'm getting the hang of what's happening.

Haa…I thought we already had settled this back in that 'almost' dismissal ceremony. But apparently, it looks like Big Bitch—I mean, Big Sis Jessica has changed her strategy against me; if she can't win using force, she's bent on winning using charms. She's aiming for me to become enamored with her and then she'll strike when I let down my guard.

Ha! I can read you like a book, girl; you won't win against me!

"Oh, so it's really Kuro!"

"Ah, so what's up?" I asked Lily, "Is there anything wrong?"

"Nah." She answered, "I was just passing by. So, how's Jessica's cooking?"

"I see. Well, so far I'm still alive." I was sarcastic.

Lily laughed, "Ah you don't have to worry about that anymore. After all, Jessica kept on asking me since the other day on how to make up with you. She wouldn't even let me sle—"

"Ah p-please don't tell M-mister K-K-Kuro about it!" Jessica was so fl.u.s.tered that I actually thought of her as cute that moment. Lily was laughing heartily.

Dear God, forgive me, for I have sinned. For a second, I thought that bitch was cute.

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With nothing else to do—like usual—I went back to my room.

Just as I opened the door…

"…"

Is this another staring contest?

The maids whom I left cleaning my place were still there, as well as their cleaning tools. Whether they really tidy up my room or not, that I can't really answer. What makes it odd is that they were all lying on my bed…and that one maid is actually holding my coat to her nose.

What the hell?

"M-m-m-m-m-m-m-"

"Kuro." I reminded them my name.

"Mister Kuro!" the leader of the maids blurted out, her face is red, "I thought you're at the kitchen!"

"I am. I just finished eating." I grabbed my coat from the maid that was holding it, "And stop sniffing that. I know I haven't taken a bath for a long time so naturally, it'll smell."

"W-w-w-w-w-we're sorry!" the leader of the maids quickly picked up her cleaning equipment and hurried out the door. Her similarly fl.u.s.tered companions quickly followed suit.

I was left alone, bewildered. "What the heck was that?"

"Ah, welcome Mister Defender—"

"Kuro. Just call me Kuro." I glared at Marquise Monfort the moment she started calling me that stupid nickname once again. "PLEASE."

"Err…K-Kuro, welcome!" Marquise Monfort repeated herself. "What brings you to the Armory?"

"Well, I was just wondering if you got a map of this place and the surrounding areas?"

"A map?" the Marquise asked, "What for?"

"I want to go exploring today." I answered, "I'd like to search for a potential house to rent or buy."

"Ah…that." There's a hint of disappointment in the Marquise's face.

What, you thought I'm going to some red-light district or something?

"Tch. And here I thought you're going to the red-light district to pick some girls."

She indeed thought of me like that!

"Well, I do have a map like that. In fact, I have maps for almost all the areas in this land." The Marquise proudly revealed, "Just ask away whenever you need it."

"Yeah, that's exactly why I'm here."

"Sorry bud, I left it at my family's mansion." was her immediate answer.

Then why the hell you told me those things, you stupid paladin?! Anyway, no matter how irritated I was, I declined to air my thoughts. I don't want any trouble anyway.

"Well, I can have you escorted around by someone knowledgeable of the town." Marquise Monfort offered a consolation, "Would you like me to arrange for that, Kuro?"

"Ah yes please." I don't want to disturb someone else. However, with the strange things happening between me and the maids, I decided to hurry with my plan to find or rent a place to stay.

"Well, sorry dude. All of my guards are busy with their training." She shrugged, "I think they've slackened their watch while I was gone."

This idiot…is she trying to pick a fight with me? And besides, I think YOU'RE the one who slackened, Marquise.

I mean, look around this office! Armor pieces and weapons scattered all around. Crumpled papers fill the spaces in-between the discarded equipment. And…is that an old pizza with molds over there? How did that thing from Earth get here?

A pigsty is much cleaner than this place!

"…"

Calm down, Kuro…you don't want any trouble, right? Oh well, I guess there's no helping it. I'll discover the town myself then.

"If you're going to town—"

"No thanks! I think I can manage on my own."

"Really, are you sure? I can get you someone who can guide you around."

"I-I'll be fine."

"I said, I can get you someone beautiful who can guide you around…"

"…"

"Someone beautiful and seductive who can guide you around…"

Uh…ahem. W-well, I do think that having a guide with those qualities isn't that bad.

But, does she even have to point out those adjectives?

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Ahem. Well, it's not really bad when you walk side by side around the town with a beautiful girl…

"And here she was, just as I promised!" Marquise Monfort was all-smiles as she introduced me to my ultimate tour guide. "Your beautiful and seductive town girl."

"…"

I was speechless. No, it's not because I was awestruck or something…w-well, make that 'I'm indeed awestruck', but not in a good way.

"Mister Kuro, meet Eris. Eris, here's Mister Kuro. He needs someone to guide him around the town."

"…"

Eris and I were silent. I could only stare blankly at her, and for some reason, she's averting her gaze from me.

I think I disturbed her work. And now she's pissed.

Well, it's not that I'm saying that Eris is not attractive; in fact, she is cute. Her short, wavy red-brown hair and brown eyes matches her gentle personality. Combined that with the oh-so-classic maid uniform, and you get one super-cute girl for a companion.

However…

No matter how I look at Eris, I can't help but to wonder if I'm going to be arrested once people saw me walking with her. I mean, her appearance is close to that of a ten-year old kid.

How did she end up along with the 'seductive' route, Marquise Monfort? Are you blind or something?

"Well, if you're asking how'd she end up with the 'seductive' description…" the Marquise was whispering to me, "Don't you know that many human nobles prefer her looks, especially because of 'that'."

By 'that' she meant Eris' c.h.e.s.t. Which is like the place where the Holy Palatial Gardens stood—absolutely flat.

"Oi. Don't lump me with criminals." I furiously whispered back.

"Nah, don't worry." The Marquise slapped my back, "I know you'll take proper responsibility; you're a man of culture, after all."

"Guh…what made you say that?"

"You like flat c.h.e.s.ts, right?"

Ha? Where did that come from?

The Marquise's stare was intense. What is she trying to prove here?

"N-no, I—"

"FLAT. IS. JUSTICE." Her expression is getting scarier by the minute.

"Err…n-not exactly—"

"FLAT. IS. ABSOLUTE. JUSTICE." I feel like I'm being coerced here.

I just nodded silently. I don't want further issues with this freak.

"See?" Marquise Monfort suddenly became cheerful, "You're indeed a man of culture." She has a twisted smirk written all over her face.

I shouldn't have asked for her help…

"Uh…Mister K-Kuro…" we heard Eris' spoke, "Could it be that y-you don't want E-Eris to accompany you?"

"Well, it's alright if you don't want to." I replied. To be honest, it's fine with me whether or not she wants to go. Eris is a servant here after all, and I think she needs to prioritize her duties more instead of going around town with a stranger like me.

However, Eris shook her head. "P-please let Eris come along if it's okay."

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Everything is silent as we went our way to the town near the Holy Palatial Gardens.

"…"

This is really awkward. I would occasionally steal a glance at Eris, and sometimes, she'd also return the favor. It's like we're bombarding each other with strange looks. Well, I can't help it; back in my world, I dealt with teenagers as a teacher. Eris is more like a pre-adolescent girl, and I don't know what interests her.

I have to be careful not to get on her bad side.

Oh, by the way, Her Holiness has graciously lent us a cart and a horse for this trip. Well, she's offering me a carriage but I quickly refused it. At least, I don't want to stand out among the locals if I plan to mingle with them. If I myself went off, I'll be fine just by walking; however, taking into consideration Eris' body, I decided to ask for a ride.

And now that I remember it, I wonder why Her Holiness and Marquise Monfort were exchanging nasty looks and smiles earlier…

"Uh…"

"Hiii!!!" I almost jumped out of the cart when I heard Eris speak.

"S-sorry; did Eris startle you?" her eyes were apologetic.

"N-nah." Of course, I wouldn't tell her the truth; I don't want to piss Eris off. "I'm just a little jumpy since the cart's pretty shaky, see?"

"Oh…" Eris smiled, though her eyes are still sad, "Eris is sorry for insisting to come with you, Mister Kuro. You even have to borrow a cart from Her Holiness out of consideration for Eris."

By the way, she's the one driving the cart; I don't know how to prod a horse to move forward.

Ah…damn. I'm making her feel bad, I need to change the topic, "Ah, that's right. I've been wanting to ask you since earlier about the town we're going to. As you know, I'm pretty new to this world, so anything I need to remember before going in?"

Eris pondered for a bit about my question. Then she explained, "Well, Arles is a pretty small but affluent town about two-thirds in size of the Holy Palatial Gardens. As a result of its proximity to Her Holiness' place, it is our immediate supplier of various goods like food, clothing, and others."

"Oh…" Well, I can see what she's talking about. Even though we're still quite a distance off the town proper itself, I can already distinguish those well-built houses meant for someone of great influence or power. "Those houses are really impressive, don't you think?"

"Ah yes. Most of the population of Arles are rich merchants, members of the nobility and influential people after all. As such, it is also a well-guarded place. A lot of soldiers from the locals' private armies patrol the surrounding area, aside from the militia raised by the town council." Eris kept on her detailed explanation, "That's why, if you noticed, we haven't encountered any monsters yet."

"Hmm…pretty beneficial, huh?" now that I realized it, seems like Eris is well-informed about Arles. Honestly, I'm starting to enjoy talking to her. "So, if I may ask, do you have any idea on how much a house sells at Arles?"

"Let's see…last time Eris checked, it's around 15 gold coins for a small property in the town."

I froze. Hearing the amount gave me goosebumps. Though I haven't had any much idea on prices and value of money here in Chersea, the number that Eris gave me is just staggering. After all, a lowest-ranked maid back at the Palatial Gardens receives 50 silver coins every start of the season.

And for the freeter—that is, me—I was to receive 20 silver coins.

So, if I intend to buy a house in this town, I would've to pass 75 seasons at least. And to be frank, I don't know the exact duration of a season here; according to what I've read in the books, there are times when the seasons are short, and otherwise.

I can't wait for 75 seasons! I might get butchered halfway by that bitch, Jessica!

"M-mister Kuro?" Eris' voice brought me back to reality, "Are you alright? You look pale."

"Ah…y-yeah, I'm fine. Thanks, Eris." I replied.

But deep inside, my mind was searching for a possible solution for my predicament. Should I ask for the Saint's help? It looks like she'll provide me aid if I did ask her; but damn, that would be a big blow to my pride as a man.

If that's how it would go, then I guess I need to get a part-time job.

"Ah, by the way Mister Kuro, there are no adventurers' guild or leveling system that exists anywhere in this land, though Eris doesn't know what are those."

Well f.u.c.k me. Eris shot me down just as I was about to ask her about that.

By the way, how can this be a proper fantasy world if there are no obligatory adventurer's guild and leveling system here? And why did this girl suddenly spoke about those when it doesn't exist here in the first place?

Ah anyway, let's forget about that. I just realized that the price Eris told me is the rate for Arles' affluent citizens.

How about the commoner ones?

"Uhm…there are only rich commoners in Arles, Mister Kuro."

"Is that so?"

"Yes, if you're looking for a commoners' quarters with more affordable price for houses, then you're looking for the city beyond those mountains to our north. The city of Kamran is the nearest here next to Arles."

"Ah, thanks for that information!" I was overjoyed when I heard that; it seems I'm still pretty lucky. "So, what's the price of properties over there?"

"S-sorry Mister Kuro, Eris doesn't exactly know."

Oh, right. I forgot that Eris and the other staff at the Holy Palatial Gardens came from the royalties and nobilities of Chersea.

There's no way they would know about a commoner's daily stuff.

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*Meanwhile, back at the Holy Palatial Gardens*

"So, Your Holiness…" it was the Marquise Monfort, "Are you sure about this?"

The Saint of Chersea slowly opened her eyes as she listened to the chief of her palace's guards. "Yes, I am serious, Marquise. That's why we sent Eris together with that otherworldly human."

Marquise Monfort can feel the cold sweat form on her forehead. She's regretting everything she had done just now…

"But what if—"

"Are you doubting me, Monfort?" Her Holiness snarled at her.

"Well, it's just that, I haven't done anything to help Eris in her problems with the other maids, and…"

"Don't worry. That boy was able to protect Eris in your stead." Her Holiness smiled at the Marquise, "I don't think there would be any problems other than…"

"Other than what, Your Holiness?"

"Well, Marquise…" the Saint's dark smile is prominent on her face, "Are you increasing your bet, or what?"

"Damn it, Your Holiness! If Kuro and Eris became close after this, then it's my win!"

"Sure!" Her Holiness' confidence is oozing from her, "But if Eris didn't progress, then I'll take everything from you save for your title!"

"Ugh…" the Marquise Monfort couldn't stay calm after hearing that. Did she just commit the biggest mistake of her life by gambling against the Saint?

Well, whatever, she thought. That little girl's d.e.s.i.r.e to get to know that strange boy from another world is her priority. So she asked for Her Holiness' help in bringing them close.

As long as Eris is happy, then she is happy…

Besides, gambling is fun and exciting anyway.

Please don't emulate her, dear readers.

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As the house issue is a matter that we can't settle yet as of this time, Eris and I just went ahead and toured around Arles. After all, it would be a wasted opportunity to learn something new about this world if we simply return to the Palatial Gardens, since we already borrowed the cart and horse.

Compared to Earth's towns, Arles is small—if I reckon, it would be around a size of a typical Earth village. A thick rampart surrounds the entire place, and the gates are manned by at least twenty well-equipped guards from the town militia.

"Oh, it's Miss Eris!"

"Open the gate!"

Apparently, Eris and the others from the Palatial Gardens are well-known here. Well, it's pretty obvious since Arles is the nearest settlement near the Saint's enclave. I wasn't questioned upon entering the town, unlike the protagonists that I read from several fantasy novels back on Earth. The soldiers even saluted us.

Heh, talk about being a big-shot. Pretty convenient, eh?

We parked our cart and horse at a nearby stable before proceeding. Then, after making sure that everything is secure, we went on our tour around the town. Coming through the main thoroughfare of Arles, I saw a lot of shops that lined up along the road, just like a typical European Middle Ages city. There were restaurants that serve fancy food, stores that sell luxury clothes, alchemists that peddle medicines and other types of potions, blacksmiths that cater to warriors' equipment…name it, I think Arles has them—well, at least, for the rich. Eris told me that prices here are much inflated than in any other areas in Chersea.

Of course, there were many people from various races walking around as we stroll and Eris was having fun explaining everything I laid my eyes upon.

"Ah, those are Elves." She said the moment I looked on those guys with pointed ears, "They come from the continent of Cherwoods to the southeast. They are an elegant and gentle race; if Eris is not mistaken, they are also great archers and magicians."

"Oh…" Well, I think almost every fantasy story that was written out there present the elves as proficient magicians and archers, so I'm not that surprised. Besides, I managed to know something about them when I was reading back at the library.

"And Elves are well-known lovers of wine and alcohol, though they can't hold being drunk. They are also closet lechers, as well."

Hey, I think that last comment is uncalled for.

Anyway, my attention then turned to those people with animal appendages as parts of their body, "So those are beastmen, if I'm correct?"

"Yes, Mister Kuro." Eris nodded, "Most of the beastmen tribes hail from the land of Cherwind to the south. They form a very close-knit society based on their appearance."

"So for example, that one with rabbit ears is from the Rabbit tribe?"

"Oh…you catch on quick, Mister Kuro."

"I think it's one of my strengths." I proudly declared. I cannot tell her that I like reading 'Isekai'-themed novels, do I? Or I'll be explaining to her all day…

Eris laughed softly, "By the way, Beastmen are a race of warriors who take pride in their unusual physical strengths. They are also well-doc.u.mented m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.ts and loves head-pats."

Err…do I really need to know that kind of information, Eris?

Anyway, I should change the topic, "Oh, those are dwarves, correct?" I was referring to those small bearded guys with stocky bodies and wielding great axes.

"Oh, those are just humans lacking in height."

S-seriously?

"If you're looking for dwarves…" Eris pointed towards a certain direction, "There they are."

Double seriously? No matter how long I stare at them, they resemble ordinary humans with colored hair, thick glasses and overweight bodies.

"Uh…Eris, aren't you mistaking those for dwarves? They look more like 'Social Justice Warriors' to me."

"Social Justice Warriors? Are those brave people from your homeland, Mister Kuro?" Eris was confused.

"Well, brave…in a way." I got a sarcastic grin on my face, "Err…anyway, I'm curious. What makes them dwarves?"

"Hmm, they call themselves dwarves. So we call them that way, or they'll be offended because we just assigned them a race-specific role brought about by the humanistic bias of the society." Eris shrugged, "Honestly, Eris doesn't understand what they mean by that, but Eris doesn't recommend getting too involved with them. The dwarves believe in the 'equality of all races' but if you take pride in your humanity, they'll be offended and debate you 'till your ears bleed."

Eris talks like she went through a traumatic experience. Uh…it's best that I follow her advice and avoid them.

"By the way Mister Kuro, dwarves are vegans; if they saw you eat meat, they'll be offended too."

Sounds like they're a pain in the a.s.s. "So let me guess, they come from a continent called 'Cherland'?"

"Nope. They live in a land named 'Equality', which is to the east from here."

Yep, too 'SJW' for me.

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Anyway, all that walking and talking has made me hungry. Since I got no single coin in my pocket, I asked Eris if we could now return to the Palatial Gardens. I tried my best to appear as casual as possible, but…

"You must be hungry, Mister Kuro?"

"H-how'd you know?" I sheepishly asked.

"Eris can hear your stomach growl." Eris laughed softly, "Don't worry, Eris brought money with her. Let's eat somewhere nice."

"Ah please…" I bowed apologetically, "I'd feel bad if you treat me for free."

"Nah, don't worry." She assured me, "This is thanks for helping Eris before. Come!" Eris pulled my hand and led me to the place she wanted to go.

"Welcome to the Holy Frills Diner!"

Err…that's quite a name. Looks like the owner put much thought in coming up with it.

Anyway, it was a small restaurant. The girls who serve were wearing frilly uniforms, thus the name of the restaurant. However, what called my attention is that macho man in a frilly dress behind the counter further in.

"Ah, welcome Miss Eris!" the macho man greeted.

"Hello, Mister Ricardo!" Eris chirped back. "By the way, he's the owner of this place, Mister Kuro."

Ricardo's deep baritone voice and serious expression doesn't match his words nor his frilly dress. I mean, I feel like he's threatening us more than welcoming. Add the eyepatch, bulging muscles and a big scar on his face, it looks like we're talking to a veteran mercenary than a restauranteur.

"Mister Ricardo's also a former mercenary." Eris added, "But he took an arrow to the knee, so he had to retire."

"Oh…" Isn't that a little Todd Howard-ish?

Ricardo laughed, "Well, that's all behind me now. I don't want to wake up in another cart with prisoners and getting attacked by a dragon on the way…"

Damn…Todd Howard, you did it again!

"So anyway, Eris…" Ricardo took an eyeful of me, "Who's the guy? Your man?"

"Err…ah, n-no!" Eris was quick to deny, "M-mister Kuro is just a friend."

"Oh…well, every love story starts with being a friend." Ricardo countered.

My maid companion fell silent; her face was beet red.

Uh, you don't need to get pissed as much as that, Eris…

"Ah, anyway, please have a seat as usual Miss Eris!"

Eris then quickly led me to her favorite spot in that restaurant. Doing that, we have to pass through a number of tables filled with other customers, some of which were eyeing us; it must be because of the disparity between our ages.

I mean, I'm a young a.d.u.l.t and Eris just looks like my little sister.

"!!!" I felt Eris jerked all of a sudden.

"What happened?" I asked her, "You okay?"

"Eris felt someone touched her b-butt."

"Eh?" I turned around and saw a bunch of armed people looking lecherously at our direction, particularly on Eris. That one's a human, and two were elves…and they don't have a nice aura emanating from them.

"Nice pick, dude!"

"How's her ass?"

Uh…these guys. I can see the fear in Eris' eyes; clearly, that's where her distrust for men came from. I, being the more m.a.t.u.r.e one, should protect her.

And damn, looks like this world has no child-protection laws…

"Hey!" I came to the table of those who touched Eris.

"Who's the shrimp, Gio?" asked an elf to their human companion.

"I dunno…all I see is a wimp."

They all laughed mockingly. Clearly, they were drunk, and they were armed. And I don't like their attitude either…

"…"

Wait, isn't this the generic 'Isekai' early scene where the protagonist gets involved with the bad guys and demonstrates his overwhelming powers by kicking their asses? Hoo…I think I should man up and show them what I can do.

"What do you want?" the human drunk gruffly asked.

"You owe Eris an apology!" is what I should've said, but instead I contented myself with, "Uh…shouldn't you…uhm, s-say sorry to my companion?"

Hey, don't judge me; it's not easy to confront aggressive and armed assholes, you know.

"Apology? What for?"

"Uh…err…y-you touched h-her."

"And so?"

"S-say sorry? P-please?" Oh god, I look pathetic.

"What's your name, kid?"

"Me? I'm Kuro."

"Hmm…and my name's Gio." I can feel the threatening aura coming from the drunk human, "Kuro…"

"G-GIO!"

"Instead of running away, you're coming right to me?"

"I can't beat the shit out of you without getting closer."

"Oh ho! Then come as close as you like."

MUDA! MUDA! MUDA! MUDA! MUDA!

ORA! ORA! ORA! ORA! ORA! ORA!

We fiercely exchanged punches…at least, through the air. I don't want to come that close to him; and he's so drunk he can't walk properly towards me.

"…"

Uhh…really, we look stupid.

"ZA WARUDO!!! (THE WORLD!)" Gio jumped and unleashed his power against me.

"NANI?" I blurted out. Then I felt someone grabbed my arms. I turned around and I saw the human drunk's elven companions trying to restrain me.

"That's enough dude!"

"Yeah, stop that! Gio's already knocked down!"

"Oh, sorry…"

Err…how'd that even happen?

"Gio hit his head on the table after jumping and fell unconscious. So, we are going in his stead!" the elves were about to reach out for their weapons when…

"Hey you two!" it was Eris; she already had her wand pointed towards them, "Don't move or Eris will burn you to cinders with her magic." The air around her became so thick and heavy that it was hard to breathe. Her eyes glared at them overwhelmingly that they trembled in fear.

"I'd walk away, if I were you."

It was Ricardo, who already decided to intervene, "Aside from bothering other customers, that girl you're dealing with is a maid from the Holy Palatial Gardens. You don't want to incur the wrath of the Human Saint, do you?"

"We're sorry!" the elves quickly grabbed the fallen Gio and scurried away.

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"E-Eris is sorry, Mister Ricardo!" Eris apologized profusely when everything settled down.

"Ahahahaha!!!" Ricardo gave a hearty laugh, "This is the first time I saw you get angry after for so long, Duchess Braunhauer! Don't worry, I was watching the whole time and I know who's in the wrong."

Well if you're watching the whole time, why didn't you intervene when things are escalating, macho man? I thought of that, but decided not to speak my mind.

"Ah anyway…" Ricardo guided us to Eris' favorite place, "Let's forget those bad things and just enjoy eating, shall we?" The moment he clapped his hands, a beastman—a girl from the Fox tribe—appeared with a pair of the restaurant's menu in her hands.

"Please order anything you want, it's on the house." Ricardo winked at us before he left.

I'm starting to like this guy.

I mean, not that 'sort' of like, but well…

Ah, whatever.

And so we were left alone in that part of the restaurant.

Well, this is a quite nice change of pace from the grandeur of the Holy Palatial Gardens. The interior of this restaurant pales in comparison to the dining room of the Holy Chambers palace, but I like its simplicity. Plus, the smallness of this place gives me that warm, cozy feeling that I haven't felt for a long time.

I feel kind of nostalgic…

"Uhh…Mister Kuro…" It was Eris, "Eris wonders what would you want to eat?"

"Oh, sorry!" I was too engrossed admiring the place that I forgot the reason I was here. "Well, how about this one?"

"Eh?!" Eris had a dismayed look on her face, "You want that? Isn't it the cheapest food here?"

Yeah it is. I precisely picked that because I don't want to be much of a burden to Eris. Even though that Ricardo guy said they'll be giving us something for free, I know Eris had a large part for that decision. If I did come here alone, I doubt that Ricardo would even bother…

"Yes, two of these please. And a pair of this one too, I'll pay for it, please tell Mister Ricardo." My train of thoughts were interrupted by Eris talking to a waitress, "There, I've already ordered our food, Mister Kuro. Plus, some sides."

"Thanks!"

"So that would be…" the waitress repeated our order, and wait…isn't that the most expensive side item on the menu? Two of them?

"One for you and one for Eris." Eris smiled mischievously. "If Eris let you, you'll be too considerate and thus, won't be able to enjoy the food here that much."

"But the payment…"

"Nope. Eris doesn't mind actually."

"I'd feel bad if I don't—"

"Like Eris told you before, it was thanks for saving her from her bullies."

"Err…thanks, I guess."

Eris, you're too kind, you know that?

"Well, I hope you're enjoying yourself, Mister Kuro."

"I do!" I honestly told her what I feel, "In fact, I think I'm imposing too much on you. It's pretty embarrassing, really. I apologize."

"Ah, please don't Mister Kuro." Eris suddenly became sad, "Actually, Eris thinks that this is only a small token compared for what you did for her and for Big sis Jessica."

She's a bitch, and you still think of her that way? You're really kind, Eris…

"But Big sis Jessica already changed her opinion of you!" Eris was quick to retort, "She's now actively convincing the other maids that you're not a pervert like other men."

Heh…as if I'd fall for that. Well, it's not that I have to actively oppose that bitch, I only need to keep my guard up. I may never know when Jessica might attack me once again.

"Eris believes that you're a good guy, Mister Kuro." She continued, "The Head Maid believes you are, too. Big sis Jessica and the other maids who hate you are also beginning to think of you that way, as well."

Nah, they're just reading too much into my actions.

I think I need to drop the truth for Eris…

"Hmm…you're too naïve, Eris." It's my turn to speak, "If you believe I'm not a pervert, or a good person, then you're mistaken. I'm a boy, so I'm definitely interested in perverted things—there's no normal guy in this world or the other that isn't interested in that. However, I put my urges and d.e.s.i.r.es to their proper places."

"…" Eris was silent.

Did her 'nice guy' vision of me crashed into pieces? Sorry kid, the world—Earth or Chersea—isn't as simple as you think. There are a lot of gray areas, no matter where you look.

"As Eris thought…" she looked at me with gentle eyes, "You're an honest person, too."

Ha?! Did she understand what I just told her?

"Eris knows that all men are like that, but Mister Kuro doesn't act based on what he feels, so Eris feels much safer with him."

Ooookay? Aren't you too trusting as well, Eris?

"That's why…" Eris suddenly stood up and bowed way too low, "Eris wanted to apologize for the trouble she caused you before, Mister Kuro. Please forgive Eris and be her friend!"

"…"

I was left speechless by that. I'm too shocked to say anything.

Uh, Eris, aren't we friends already?