The Reason I Keep Avoiding My Childhood Friend

“Aren, you are more important to me than those things.”

I felt like I was choking on my breath from the tension that had been tightening me up.

“You mean you’re not following the Grand Duke because of me?”

The tip of my questioning lips trembled, and I bit my lower lip.

“Yes. It’s because of you. Because I want to be with you.”

I stared at Kir, the situation was tense. He raised his lips into a loose smile.

“Of course, you are more important than those things.”

After hearing Kir’s answer, the tension melts away. I was concentrating on the sensation of tickling and nervousness, but in an instant, it cools down.

Are you talking about that now?

I was at a loss as to how to explain this feeling. As I was choosing what to say to Kir, his red lips moved in an even deeper arc.

“Now, are you excited?”

Behind his sweet voice, he narrows his eyes and smiles brightly. It was a bewitchingly beautiful smile that would captivate most people in an instant.

It was clearly beautiful enough to take my breath away, but I sighed despondent. It seems that he was not willing to fulfill his duties, and he had learned to use other people as an excuse.

He had learned bad things from somewhere and tried to deceive people.

What annoyed me even more was that I was the one who he used as an excuse for doing things he didn’t want to do. It was truly astounding. Anyone who sees it would thought that this guy really wanted to see me. Like a person who has been waiting for me for so long, he was very well spoken.

“Would I be excited? That you keep using me as an excuse not to do your job?”

I complained about what he was doing now. It was a warning not to use me as an excuse in absurd places.

Kir froze at my sharp voice. And after a while, a rough sigh through his red lips shook Kir’s hair. It was a nervous yet strangely languid movement.

“Does that sound like that?”

He was frowning, full of annoyance, as if he had been bewitched by a bright smile. He was the one who bewitched me. Does he think I would be afraid if he threatened me like that?

“Then does that mean something different?”

I replied without relenting, and now Kir grabbed his head and let out a weary sigh. Kir’s fingers rubbed between his brows in annoyance. I feel strangely bad about this. I squinted my eyes and glared at Kir, expressing displeasure.

“You think I’m using you as an excuse to not do my duty?”

“You mean you have nothing to do here?”

I crossed my arms and stared back at him. If he says that he has nothing to do in the Empire, I’ll apologize. If he has something to say, he should say it. I raised the tip of my chin and stared at Kir.

“Don’t be like this, you’re telling me to follow my father and watch and learn diligently, right?”

“It’s your duty.”

I answered Kir’s wise question promptly. Even if he hated the empire, that was what Kir had to do. He was not a guy with no sense of responsibility, so I figured he’d understand. But Kir’s eyes shone blue at my words. Then came a low grunting voice.

“You didn’t even want to see me?”

“I’m seeing you now.”

I was sad because I didn’t hear from him, but I didn’t really want to see him, so I answered roughly. Rather, I was petty because he didn’t send me a letter! If I don’t answer, Kir would be hurt again.

However, Kir’s eyebrows were raised, perhaps finding the answer was satisfactory.

“You don’t know when you’ll see me again when I go back.”

Why are you bringing up the future when we’re sitting face to face!

“You must work hard to do what you can when you are young! Look at me! I’m studying so hard every day to become a civil servant! But are you saying you’re giving up yours?”

My frustration caused me to lose my temper without realizing it.

When I see Kir, I think of myself in my previous life, and I feel sorry for him. Time was really precious when you were young, so it was frustrating to see him not knowing that.

This was why adults nag at the young ones. I came to know their intentions as such only now.

Kir had eyes of a rebellious child. There was a burst of discontent. I understand that feeling too. So even if I want to move on saying that Kir will take care of it, that won’t be the case. I had been taking care of him since I was very young, so I had been interfering discreetly.