To Hold One’s Joy

hapter 14-1: Punishment

As Luo Chen testified that she wias the one who pushed Luo Sheng into the lake, Sheng Jialan's fear, panic, and desperation intensified. She had mentally prepared herself to bear the following consequences. Well, the worst of them is probably losing her life.

However, when Luo Sheng uttered, "You did this for Su Yao," the foundation supporting Sheng Jialan's spirit shattered instantly. Su Yao was an untouchable presence in her heart, how could he be dragged into this matter?

"It has nothing to do with Su Er Gongzi!" Sheng Jialan hissed. If previously she was like a trembling snail hiding within its shell, pretending not to exist amidst the storm, now the protective shell had cracked, revealing a fragile and unsightly face.

Sheng Jialan sat paralyzed on the ground and broke down, "I just couldn't bear Luo Sheng constantly pestering Su Er Gongzi, so I acted impulsively. Su Er Gongzi had no knowledge about this, nor did he know how I truly felt about him..."

Sheng Jiayu's eyes widened as if she had seen a ghost, and she stammered: "Ermei, you… you actually have feelings for Su Yao——" After hearing Sheng Jiayu's words, Sheng Jialan's breakdown subsided slightly. She looked back at Sheng Jiayu and asked, "Is it wrong for me to like him?"

All the ladies in Jinsha County were attracted to Su Er Gongzi, so why couldn't she be? Just because she was a concubine's daughter, did she have to stand behind her elder sister and even behind Luo Sheng?

She didn't hope for a chance to be with that remarkable young man. Still, she also couldn't tolerate a worthless person like Luo Sheng obsessively pursuing the person she had in the tip of her heart.

Get rid of Luo Sheng to restore Su Er Gongzi's peaceful life. This idea had been brewing in her mind for a long time until that day when Luo Sheng revealed her feelings for Su Yao to Zumu, and she could no longer suppress that killing urge.

Hurt by Sheng Jialan's unapologetic attitude, Sheng Jiayu muttered, "Of course, you can, I just never heard you mention it..." Sheng Jialan sneered in response, "Why should I mention it? Does saying it means I can marry Su Er Gongzi? I am well aware that I am unworthy of him."

Sheng Laotaitai observed her second granddaughter, who had lost all sense of dignity, and asked slowly, "Why do you believe you don't deserve him?" The question took aback Sheng Jialan.

Sheng Laotaitai's face filled with distress as she spoke, "You are the second daughter of the Sheng family, and Su Yao is the second son of the Su family. Our families have a good relationship and are a suitable match[1]. What makes you believe you are unworthy of him? Suppose you have shared your feelings with your mother. In that case, we can arrange for a matchmaker to approach the Su family and seek their opinion on this matter. If it works out, it will be a joyous occasion; if it doesn't, you will have no regrets. But instead, you have kept everything hidden in your heart and ended up harming others. With what you did, do you think you have lived up to the elders who have always cherished you or your siblings who have cared for you?"

"I, I..." Sheng Jialan glanced at Sheng Laotaitai, Sheng Dataitai, Sheng Ertaitai, and her brothers before her gaze fell upon Sheng Jiayu, whose face was stained with tears. She couldn't help but cry heartbreakingly. Was she mistaken? She had a slight chance of being with Su Er Gongzi, but she had destroyed it with her own hands...

Sheng Jialan gazed down at her pale hands, overwhelmed with remorse. She eventually couldn't bear the huge emotional shock and fainted.

Sheng Laotaitai's lips trembled as she quickly called for a doctor, her gaze subconsciously shifting toward Luo Sheng. Luo Sheng was still standing quietly, but Sheng Laotaitai felt as though she was seeing her granddaughter in a new light. From Jialan's breakdown to subsequent fainting were solely a result of Luo Sheng's words:

You did this for Su Yao.

How did Luo Sheng know about Jialan's infatuation with Su Yao? And how did she deduce that Jialan's actions were driven by her feelings for him? Sheng Laotaitai harbored numerous doubts in her heart, but she understood that now was not the appropriate time to seek the answers.

[1] 門當戶對 méndāng-hùduì: the families are well-matched in terms of social status