Tunnel Rat

"Wow, I can smell the mushrooms from here! I'm starving. You've got to have worked up an appetite with all that skulking and fighting. Nice job by the way. It's not easy laying a tail on old Gilad. That guy was fighting as a mercenary for decades before he retired to teach combat to the new whelps. My grand pappy said he served under Gilad during the 3rd Spider War, and the Tail-Master was going grey even back then. Pappy always said it was good fighting but lousy food. Never enough cheese to feed the army. Makes sense I guess, since that's what the war was over. Makes me hungry just thinking about it. I'm going to grab a double bowl of shrooms with some extra Bleu on top. Good stuff."

Milo was content to just follow along with the big guard and let him carry on both sides of the conversation. They were nearing a large wooden building and Milo could smell the food himself. The unmistakable smell of fried mushrooms was drifting to his nose, as well as the pungent aroma of moldy cheese. He agreed with Brutus; it was a two bowl night for sure.

As they went to step up onto the wide porch of the eating hall, a huge shadow skulked around the corner, sniffing at them. "Bleu? Larry wants some Bleu! Kind Brutus! Handsome Brutus! Have cheese for little Larry?"

Milo took a step behind Brutus. The guard was huge, but whatever this was, it was bigger. At least seven foot tall, it was equally as wide and shaped like an inverted triangle. Larry had wide shoulders and massively overmuscled arms and hands. His arms were so long that his claws scraped the ground. His chest and tail were equally large, but it tapered to a small waist and normal sized legs. Large feet ending in dirty claws were attatched to the thin legs.

Nothing about Larry looked right. Its muscles weren't in the right spots, and one eye was larger than the other. Its mouth was filled with oversized fangs that kept it from shutting. A bit of foam leaked from its mouth as it talked.

Brutus stood firm. "NO! No cheese for Larry! Larry knows the rules. Larry will wait until the Cheese Master feeds him. Larry follows the rules, or Larry leaves the Hollow!"

The hulking pile of muscle seemed to deflate a bit. "Larry follows rules. Larry is good rat."

Then he sniffed, and the large eye swiveled over to Milo. "New friend? Tallsqueak be new friends with Larry? Tallsqueak smart and handsome, and Larry smells cheese bits in Tallsqueak's pockets."

Brutus looked at Milo. "Oh shit. You should go on inside. I should have warned you. No one keeps cheese on them if they are anywhere close to Larry. I'll be in when I have him settled" He used one hand to push Milo towards the doors, and the other hand grabbed Larry by its metal collar as it lunged for Milo.

"What does it have in its pocketses?!! Larry needs to know!!!"

Milo pushed open the door and stepped inside. The hall was half filled with rat-kin happily enjoying their dinner. Tables were arranged around the outside of the room, with the center taken up by a charcoal fire over which several pots were suspended with frying pans of tasty mushrooms cooking on the edges. Several stone ovens were venting heat and steam into the air. Copper pots, strings of onions, garlic, and herbs hung from the ceiling all over the room along with kettles, cooking pots, and smoked hams. Indeed, the place less resembled a dining hall than it did a massive kitchen with a few tables added as an afterthought.

The chef was huge, with a large belly, stout legs, and quick hands that darted among his pots and pans adding a bit of salt or herbs, or stirring something briefly. His whiskers were glorious, sweeping out from his nose at least a foot and a half to either side. Like his nose, his whiskers were a light blue in color.

A server came up to Milo. "New in the Hollow? Haven't seen you before. Let's get you sat down and some shrooms in front of you. Good stuff tonight, Bleusnout is really happy with his new recipe. I'm Riftkin, my cousin Smiley is the other server. Just yell if you need something. All one big happy family here."

Brutus stepped into the room. Behind him a mournful cry rang out. "No Cheese? No cheese for Larry? No friends for Larry?"

Riftkin shuddered. "Well, almost everyone is happy. Hey! Brutus, double bowl for you?"

Brutus grabbed a bench at a table. "You know it, Rift. Grab a couple for my new pal, Tallsqueak, too. Have a seat buddy. Food will be right out. Bleusnout cooks fast, never keeps anyone waiting."

Milo grabbed a seat, and indeed, the food was on the table in less than a minute. The meal was a mixture of mushrooms fried in oil with scallions and herbs, topped with a dusting of crumbly bleu cheese. Milo was in heaven.

Brutus tossed a small coin to Riftkin, who pocketed it. Milo brought out his own coin. Riftkin held it up and examined it before smiling. "Oh Ho! You got a coin from Gilad? Very Nice! He's hard to impress. You'll work hard for it though. This will get you meals for the next three days. Come in anytime the fire is burning hot, and I'll be here tossing food on tables." With that he left the two to their meal.

Milo devoured his first bowl and was just starting on his second when Brutus finished his second bowl. He patted his stomach and picked his teeth with a sharp claw. "Good food. The Cheese Master always cooks up something good when he harvests a new crop of cheese. As you can tell from his name and his whiskers, he likes the blue, moldy varieties. Oh, and sorry about Larry, but you know how it is."

Milo shook his head. "No, I really don't. What's wrong with him?"

Brutus was surprised. "You've never seen a Cheese Fiend before? Wow, your hollow must have really had things under control if no one gave into their cravings. I thought we were doing good with just Larry. I've heard of some hollows having a dozen or more fiends running around."

Milo wasn't sure what to say, but Brutus seemed friendly, and he needed information. He remembered one of the classes he was offered, and was worried. "I didn't really grow up in a hollow, pretend I'm sort of uneducated and just hit town. What happened to Larry?"

Brutus seemed taken aback. "Wow, really? So, you haven't been told the stories or got the training we give to our whelps? You're lucky then. You could have become another Larry pretty easy. All it takes is ignoring the warnings and eating too much cheese. Hard not to, the shit is so good and a little can give you a nice edge in combat. Too much though and the addiction gets out of control. Next thing you know, it's all you care about."

Milo felt a bit ill. "So, is there a point of no return? Or can you get rid of the addiction?"

Brutus shook his head. "I'm pretty sure you know the answer already. We're rat-kin, we're born with addiction and we'll die with it. But we Master the Cheese so the Cheese doesn't Master us. I saw how you tore into your food. Maybe you like your cheese a bit too much right now? We can help you get that under control. Joining a hollow is the best way to get training."

Brutus thought for a moment. "But Larry smelled cheese on you. Maybe we should play it safe and you hand that over to me? I'll keep it for you."

Milo thought for a moment, and then reached into his pocket and brought out a pound of cheddar sealed in red wax, with just a small nibble out of the side. The smell of the sharp cheese made a couple of heads turn. His hand was shaking as he went to hand it to Brutus, and part of him was objecting to letting it go. After a half a minute, he made his shaking hand drop the cheese into Brutus's large paw.

"Good man. You can't be too far gone if you can still give cheese away. A little hard work to sweat it out of your system and some remedial classes and you'll have things under control."

From out on the porch Larry began wailing again. "CHEDDAR! Larry smells cheddar! Larry needs the CHEDDAR!"

Brutus shook his head sadly. "You've had your first lesson already. You met Larry."