What Do You Mean I'm The King Now??

"Oh! I've never seen one before...they look..."

"You just go like this with your hand and..."

"...and this 'jerking it' will really work?"

"...King Ash once told me doing this makes him feel alive..."

"I see...how strange...men capable of such self healing...by the way, I really didn't mean to, um...I just...so sorry...all just so sudden, you know...never had a man, you know, touch me there and...did he just move?"

"It's working. Looks like just a bit more to go."

****

Even as my consciousness flickers, I can hear voices around me. One, I'm pretty sure, is Candy's. The other I don't recognize. Who is Candy talking to? I don't have much time to think about the question however, as a sudden sense of euphoria washes over me.

W-what is this feeling? Ohhhh, it's soooooo goooooodddd. F.u.c.kkkkkk. So warm. Nghhhhh. It's tingling. Ohhhhh shiiiiiiitttt. Mmmmmhmmmmm. My body...moving....it's own. Haaaaaa. Haaaaaa. Can't stop...I think…coming out...can't hold it in! F.u.c.k! Arghhhhhh!

My eyes fly open, and my body suddenly tenses, as my d.i.c.k starts pulsing like crazy. Immediately following, a high-pitched cry reverberates through my eardrums.

"Eep! Something came out!"

Still a bit unfocused, I scan around for the source of the voice, and I'm surprised to see that it's the female centaur, towering over me and looking more lively than before. She's even more elegant now, standing tall, with her sharp features basked in an orange glow, cast in the golden light of the setting sun, like a noble aura which exudes the grace found of royalty, paired with the complexion of a Swedish supermodel, the very definition of "majestic". Indeed, her appearance is the very definition of majestic, but-

Did...she just say "Eep"?

"See, I told you it would work."

I hear Candy's voice, and my eyes turn to look, catching the graphic sight of her hand still wrapped around my softening p.e.n.i.s. A pool of semi-white s.e.m.e.n covers her delicate fingers, a bit watery due to my earlier o.r.g.a.s.ms and low constitution.

Now feeling quite s.e.n.s.i.t.i.v.e, I brush at her arm, and she lets go. Then I look up at her face, staring into her golden eyes. "W-what happened?"

"You passed out, King Ash, and I revived you using your special technique," she replies in a completely straight face. Candy's lack of any shame whatsoever causes me to momentarily blush in embarrassment, and I look away to avert my eyes, but her words do jog my memory.

That's right. The centaur's kick to my c.h.e.s.t. My health must have been low enough from the previous battle with the bugbear that the kick was enough damage to reduce my HP to zero, causing me to fall unconscious. Well, at least it wasn't more damage. Exactly 1.5HP more, and I'd have actually died. Game over. Yeah...that would have been bad...ha...ha…

I close my eyes briefly, pulling up my stats screen. I note that my HP at the moment is sitting at exactly one out of six, up from zero due to Candy's "revival technique". While still dangerously low, it will suffice to keep me conscious while my natural regeneration restores the remainder of my HP. Satisfied for now, I close my stats screen and then open my eyes. Finding myself n.a.k.e.d, I look back to Candy and ask, "Where's my stuff?"

"Over there," Candy replies. I stand up and walk to where she is pointing, a location about ten feet away. As I approach, I am surprised to find my equipment piled neatly beside a large oak tree, with my clothes folded and my items sorted, as if someone had spent time carefully organizing everything.

Did Candy do this?

Without thinking too much more about it, I equip all my things before heading back to Candy's location. Drawing near, I see the female centaur staring at me. As soon as she notices me looking her way however, she quickly averts her eyes, and I can tell that her normally pale cheeks are suddenly rosy with blush. Her reaction causes my heart to flutter.

H-has she fallen for me? The hero who saved her life?

Suddenly, a stream of fantastical images flash through my mind, like a movie in fast forward. She's with me on the beach, holding hands as we sit in the sand, the salty ocean breeze blowing back her majestic white locks. Then we're high in the mountaintops, watching the sunset, and I pull her in for a long kiss, my hands feeling the crook of her back and the mounds of her b.r.e.a.s.ts. And now we're in a bedroom m.a.k.i.n.g. .l.o.v.e, her calm, elegant demeanor belying the l.u.s.tful gaze I see in her refined, violet eyes. She wants it. She wants it bad. However, never does she m.o.a.n or cry out, a curse of her noble character, and in the throes of her self-imposed torment of p.l.e.a.s.u.r.e, she only lets out the occasional grunting mew. Hot. Nghhh. Faster. Ahhh.

Just as I'm about to reach the climax of my fantasy, I see the subject of my imagination turn my way, her stunning violet eyes locking with my gaze. Her mouth opens slightly, as if about to speak.

Yes, my dear? What is it? Are you about to confess your undying affection to me? Ask that we make sweet love and have little elf-centaur babies?

I feel my body lean forward, in anticipation of her words. When she finally speaks, she says something so profound, so penetrating, that I nearly fall over in surprise.

She say, "Stop staring at me, maggot!"

And just like that, my fantasy shatters.