Your Scandals Are Way Cuter Than You

Qi Jun took a deep breath, and smiled awkwardly: “I’m afraid this app has decided to fuck with you. Why don’t you quit and change to another question?”

“It’s okay, it can try. But I’m still going to win.”

Qi Jun: “…”

No need, it’s really not necessary.

“Where do these questions come from?” Qi Jun was a little curious.

“They all came from various hot searches discussed on Weibo and other sites. Those trending topics are selected by relevance, then copied directly to the question bank. The developers, of course, don’t want to invite lawyers from slighted parties, so they tried to be as impartial and truthful as possible. It won’t make a question out of nowhere, so they just outsource it from social media to avoid legal troubles.” Jiang Ying explained. 

His opponent had already entered the dialogue area. This time the opponent’s name was [Mooncake], and their stance was that Jiang Ying’s acting was not bad.

[Mooncake]: Hello, hello? Are you there?

[Mooncake]: CutieBlush.jpg

[Mooncake]: Let me say it first, Jiang Ying’s acting skills are actually not bad. His anti-fans might say that his acting is poor, but don’t easily be swayed by those people. They will always hate Jiang Ying no matter what. He has his brilliant moments, and at the very least, you can feel that his acting has a sincere feelings to it. 

[Boss Crab]: ???

[Boss Crab]: Say what you want, but the fact is that Jiang Ying’s acting skills are shit.

[Boss Crab]: ProvocativeSmile.jpg

Qi Jun who was watching the battle from the sidelines: “…”

“Is your excitement… real?” Qi Jun stared dumbfounded at the excited Jiang Ying, “You’re really bashing yourself?”

This irascible brat was usually prideful. But in order to win this game, he wouldn’t hesitate to just… roast himself. 

“Anyway, he doesn’t know that I am Jiang Ying.” Jiang Ying said cheerfully.

[Boss Crab]: Jiang Ying’s acting skills are so bad. No, that shitty thing shouldn’t be called acting skills. Even elementary school kiddies can recite texts more emotionally than he can recite his lines.

[Boss Crab]: The lines reading skills are atrocious, and you can’t actually feel him emoting. Do you know that TV dramas starring Jiang Ying automatically dooms its rating? And movies starring Jiang Ying would have its box office sales in the negative? He’s just a bad luck sign to have as a cast member. Directors hate him. You get what I mean, yeah? 

[Boss Crab]: Don’t think that Jiang Ying’s acting skills are okay just because his father is a movie emperor. Acting skills must’ve skipped his generation. 

[Mooncake]: …

[Mooncake]: Needless to say, Jiang Ying still has so many fans…

[Boss Crab]: You are off-topic, the system will deduct your points. So what if he has many fans? Is that a measure of his acting skills? A dog can have many fans and it doesn’t mean that it can act in movies. Let me tell you the truth, even his fans also think his acting is unsalvageable. The cherry on top is that he knows his acting skills are equivalent to a turd, yet he doesn’t want to improve it. 

[Boss Crab]: There is a raining scene in “A Whisper of Love“. He NG’d1not good; the scene has to be re-shoot so much that the director almost cried. Also, let me tell you, his shitty skills are everywhere to the point that an anti-fan could devote an entire Weibo account to compiling it all while criticizing his skill. That account now has over 50,000 followers. 

[Mooncake]: Are you a motherfcking2deliberately censored, since in the raw Mooncake also censored himself anti??

[System notification: “Mooncake” insulted the other party’s mother. 20 credit points will be deducted. If the deduction reaches 100, the account will be banned.]

[System notification: “Mooncake” has exited the match. “Boss Crab” wins this round.]

“Look, it’s not difficult to win. But the ‘Freestyle Fight’ zone is so much more interesting.” Jiang Ying bragged.

Qi Jun, who watched the whole battle, didn’t know what to say anymore. He could only reluctantly praise Jiang Ying, “You are really amazing.”

“I’m just playing normally. Nothing special at all.” Jiang Ying humble bragged, “And I didn’t tell any lies, did I? My acting skills aren’t good at all.” 

“At least you are self-aware.” Another voice replied from somewhere in the room. Out of nowhere, Qi Zhu walked towards the two of them. He took off his sunglasses and mask as he heard Jiang Ying’s “self-effacing” words.

“Only I’m allowed talk bad about myself. You’re not allowed.” Jiang Ying slapped his phone on the table, blocking the app interface, and turned to glare at Qi Zhu, “Didn’t  you say you can’t come? Also, what kind of freak wears sunglasses at night?”  

“You didn’t ask if I would be coming, and I didn’t say I wouldn’t come.” Qi Zhu sat down beside Jiang Ying, “I’m popular, so I have to be careful not to be recognized.”

“You’re saying that I’m just a nobody, then? No need for any disguises at all, bleh. Our relationship is a shipwreck, there’s no way we can have a peaceful dinner together,” Jiang Ying said, “Shoo, shoo. Get away from me.”

“The relationship between you two…” Qi Jun swallowed half of what he wanted to say.

These two ex-deskmates’ relationship had always been something of a mystery. Outsiders like him couldn’t really discern what actually happened between the two of them. 

The people at the party gradually gathered, and the topics of everyone’s conversation became more varied group-by-group. Their middle school was one of the best schools in H City, and the quality of students they cultivate was also high. But in their class, there were only three people who were involved with the entertainment industry: Jiang Ying, Qi Zhu, and Qi Jun. 

The homeroom teacher of the class was also invited. As soon as Teacher Zhang entered the door, he saw Jiang Ying sitting inside and greeted him: “Discipline Committee Member Jiang?”

“Ah yes,” Qi Jun remembered, “Back then, Jiang Ying was the discipline committee member, right? I think he used to have this series of… special notebooks. He would write down all things that happened within the class, be it big or trivial. Like, who copied homework or who fell asleep during class. He knows all our dirt better than all the teachers too, doesn’t he? Damn… I used to write love letters to the girl in the next class every day. Is that how the teacher knows about my puppy love?” 

“That’s one of his few hobbies.” Qi Zhu, who hadn’t spoken much, suddenly answered.

Qi Jun: “?”

The atmosphere in their class used to be good, as they were all friendly to each other. It’s been a long time since they gathered like this, but everyone was still familiar with one another. No one was boasting about their current achievements, and all they talked about was their shared past.

“Hey, do you guys still remember that the school didn’t allow us to order takeout? Jiang Ying used Qi Zhu’s name to order, but the two of them caught and punished to stand together.”

“Yes, yes! That was hilarious, alright. Ah, also, do you remember that, one time, Jiang Ying read his self-reflection essay like it’s like rap, and someone shouted for him to make his debut quickly.”

Jiang Ying complained with a laugh: “Hey! All you guys did was talk shit about me? How long was that again? Why the hell do you guys still remember??”

The topic turned to another direction. Jiang Ying watched Qi Zhu who sat beside him, and it just made him remember his mission to clear up the @BossCrab account’s name. Now, he kinda wanted to provoke Qi Zhu.

“What kind of phone games are you playing?” Jiang Ying imitated his brother’s usual tone of lecture, “Is it that attractive that it makes you play it during dinner time?”

Qi Zhu raised his head and looked at Jiang Ying for a while. He was still expressionless, but his eyes were a little more playful and a little… sympathetic: “It’s really attractive, much more interesting than eating.”

Jiang Ying frowned slightly. Somehow, he had a bad feeling about this, “What is it?” 

Just then, his mobile phone rang. It was a phone call from his assistant. 

Jiang Ying still remembered what he had promised Assistant Chen before leaving, and preemptively said: “I didn’t do anything, I was at a class reunion, like a good citizen I have always been.”

Assistant Chen: “…I know.”

“Then what’s the matter?” Jiang Ying was a little confused. Chen Shu usually didn’t like to call him directly. If he wanted something, he would text him via WeChat instead. Every time he called him like this, it was because he got into a scandal. 

“Am I on the Weibo hot search?” Jiang Ying asked tentatively.

“…and it’s viral.” Assistant Chen said, “It’s like this. Long story short, just now, Chi Yunkai, the rapper of the T.ATW group, was participating in a variety show. He was tasked to play a round of game in this app called ‘Fight!’. Maybe you don’t know about this app, so let me summarize it first. This app was released several years ago, and it’s just for bored people to fight and quarrel over unimportant topics. I feel that people who play this app simply have too much time in their hands.” 

Jiang Ying: “…”

Assistant Chen seemed very angry, and his words became more and more passionate. “I guess the program team didn’t expect that he would get the question ‘Is Jiang Ying’s acting skills bad?’ in the app’s new topic option. Seeing he got a topic about you, he tried to save your face and praise you for Gu Wei’s sake. But his opponent was too strong, and seemed to be one of your anti-fans. They spared no effort to bash you and won the match. All of these were broadcast live just now, and everyone had seen this.” 

His assistant took a deep breath, and his voice gained a dangerous edge to it, “If I ever met this piece of shit [Boss Crab], I’m going to tear him a new one.” 

Jiang Ying: “……….”

“I always knew that you can fight, and so can your fans. But, I never thought that one day, I would meet such a strong anti-fans.” Assistant Chen sighed, “That’s it, I’ll hang up first. I will help you find someone to do public relations.”

Jiang Ying: “……………….”

What just happened?

He knew that his account was getting too much unfavorable attention as of recently. But… it seemed that no matter how he would fight in the app, he would get viral in one way or another. Maybe it’s cursed. 

He still hadn’t been able to prove that he wasn’t Qi Zhu’s fan. And now, he had been labelled as Jiang Ying’s anti-fan too?    

What kind of bullshit is it??

“What are you thinking?” Qi Zhu stretched out his hand and waved it in front of Jiang Ying’s face.

“It’s nothing.” Jiang Ying recovered.

“Have you seen the hot search?” Qi Zhu pushed his mobile phone in Jiang Ying’s direction, “This app seems very interesting, I think you should like it very much. it suits your personality, won’t you consider installing it?”

“I haven’t used it, I don’t like it, and I will never use it in the future.” Jiang Ying turned his head, refusing to see eye-to-eye with Qi Zhu.

“Wow, Second Young Master Jiang, this isn’t you just now… Aww!” Qi Jun caught a glimpse of Qi Zhu’s phone screen from the corner of his eye, and before he could finish speaking, Jiang Ying stomped his foot hard.

Jiang Ying’s second half of the meal was a bit tasteless. His phone kept ringing with notifications – it was from his big fans sending him comforting messages. 

[Ge, that “Boss Crab” person who scolded you was really too much.]

[We aren’t fans of your acting skills, and we know that, but we cannot tolerate him insulting you like this.]

[Ge, I found something about Boss Crab. Apparently, he’s a fan of Qi Zhu. Tch, those bastards are really out to hack you.] 

“Idols should stay away from the lives of their fans.” Qi Zhu chided him in disagreement. 

Jiang Ying glanced at Qi Yi vigilantly, always feeling that this person was gloating at him just now. 

In the Weibo fanclub, the big fans are comforting the little silhouettes.

Big Silhouette: It’s okay, sisters. This kind of scumbag is the type who only speaks ill of people behind their back. He is a coward who doesn’t dare to fight our gege face-to-face. If we banded together, he’s nothing. 

Silhouette 1: That’s right, I think he needs to accept Jiang Ying-gege’s beating. Let’s see how his mentality will collapse like a house of cards then.

Silhouette 2: Qi Zhu’s fans are really too much… this level of nastiness aren’t acceptable!

“Come, eat a chicken leg.”

“Come, eat some vegetables.” Jiang Ying stared at his phone and was in no mood to eat. Qi Zhu uncharacteristically helped him pick up a few dishes. He imitated his previous tone of scolding as he spoke, “What kind of mobile phone game that is so interesting, you are playing while eating? So rude.” 

This hot search had been withdrawn. But it had embedded itself into the netizens’ minds. So the situation continued to escalate. By the time Jiang Ying returned home, @BossCrab had been confirmed as a Qi Zhu’s fan by netizens. Naturally, this led to a fandom war.  

“Ah, what the fuck is happening now?” Jiang Ying moaned as he laid down on his bed, “It’s annoying.”

He wasn’t aware which keyword triggered the start-up process of the smart speaker. Gossip Classmate turned itself on, and its cold, mechanical voice echoed in his bedroom, “Life is so beautiful. Master shouldn’t be bothered by trivial things. Xiao Gua will play the song “Good Luck”, and may fortune come for Master.” 

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1not good; the scene has to be re-shoot2deliberately censored, since in the raw Mooncake also censored himself